Archive for the ‘Self-Sabotage’ Category

Pallas-Pluto New Moon

December 8, 2015

Conveniently, we only need to do one chart for the upcoming New Moon and Pluto-Pallas Initiation, because they occur only three hours apart – and because they are intricately intertwined.  The Initiation is the primary Focus of the chart, but the New Moon isn’t too far behind.  Let’s start with the Pallas-Pluto Cycle.

We have some Boundaries that are…

  • too tight – our Judgments, which Limit our Experience, and some that are
  • too loose – the places where we Give Away our Power.  

The five-year Pallas-Pluto Cycle is always a major Teaching about how we Sabotage our Self by…

  • holding what we Want at arm’s length because we have Unconscious Judgments that interfere with our ability and willingness to Receive it
  • lacking the ability and willingness to strive toward our Goals because we Give Away the Power we need to achieve them. 

In a usual Pallas-Pluto Cycle, we find ourselves being “forced” to tighten and loosen Boundaries to deal with circumstances that arise, but we often over-react, tightening where optimally we’d loosen, and vice versa.  For instance, for the last five years we’ve been encountering situations where we have unfinished Emotional business.  If we were Conscious of this, we’d have been Braving up to Lovingly and Gently Embrace the Emotions involved so we could Transcend them.  Without the Consciousness we’d be more likely to Choose Avoidance.  This Choice, to Embrace or Avoid, will have had a big influence on how we adjusted our Boundaries with People and Situations and Things, and those adjustments will have had a big influence on whether we’ve Manifested what we Want.

The prior Cycle Initiated at 6 Capricorn (the Pisces Duad) in January 2011, “Ten logs lie under an archway leading to darker woods“; the new Cycle Initiates at the Midpoint of Capricorn (in the Gemini Duad), “In a hospital, the children’s ward is filled with toys.

This next Cycle is about continuing to Heal through being willing and able to Play with new processes and variations on the processes we’ve been using.  We can expect Alternative/Complementary Medicine to expand more than we’d otherwise Expect, for instance.  And Being now Conscious, we’ll Choose Humor and Excitement over Gravity and Fear and Hesitation – it wouldn’t hurt to remember the anthem that Fear + Breathing = Excitement.  The Challenge to Support our Yintegrity will be more accentuated, but easier, than it has been, and we’ll be more likely to Choose to develop the hidden Genius that we’ve been Ashamed or Frightened of, than to maintain the Masks we’ve used to create the Illusion of Popularity.

The Pluto-Pallas Initiation is the focus of a T-Square across a Mars-Uranus Opposition (Braving up to Support our Yintegrity, or not), but the Opposition is Trine-Bridged (Graced) by the New Moon, which at 20 Sagittarius (“Pelicans, menaced by the behavior and refuse of men, seek safer areas for bringing up their young“) Conjoins dwarf planet Ixion (Pathological Genius).  The Mars-Uranus Opposition is also Trine-Bridged by Ceres (Sustainability), which with Chaos (Unlimited Potential) forms a Grand Trine (Dumb-Luck Grace) – making Uranus the head of the resulting Kite (Ease in seeing the Prize to be gained by Choosing Yintegrity, and hence ease in pursuing it assertively).

The Pluto-Pallas Initiation is also the focus of a Golden Gnomon…

to use the Sacred-Geometry term for what we’ve been calling a Quintangle – two planets Biquintile to one another with a third planet at the near Midpoint; the Gnomon is “Golden” because like the Golden Rectangle it’s constructed using the Golden Section…

With Juno Biquintile the South Node as its base (Learning about our Suppressed Emotions).

The New Moon (Reboot) is also the head of another Kite (Ease) with the Mars-Chaos-Ceres Grand Trine (Dumb-Luck Grace with Sustainable Projects of Unlimited Scope), which we can hope will apply to the Paris Climate Talks.  Taking out Ceres and adding back Uranus gives us a Golden Rectangle, with Mars-Uranus and New Moon-Chaos as the Oppositions.

While Golden or Mystic Rectangles provide much Grace, their Gifts are multiplied when we Respond to the Oppositions by Paying Attention to the “Coins” implied by their Contradistinctions.  

While the New Moon-Ceres Sextile is short, a few additional Degrees would give us five of the six points of a Grand Sextile (Ease, especially when we take the first step deliberately), with the Vacancy near the Midpoint of Leo.

The implication is that we can Reboot ourselves into an Unlimited Future by moving Assertively toward greater Yintegrity.  If you get stuck, just Ask yourself, What would I do if I had Unquestioned Self-Confidence in this situation?  While we don’t want to broadcast it far and wide, we’re likely to find that our immediate Community will be delighted to Support our casting aside of the Masks we’ve been hiding our True Self behind.  After all, they already know who we Really are, and they’ve been Wondering why we don’t seem to know it!

One last Configuration: a Novile Yod (Pay Close Attention but Don’t Make a Big Deal out of It) points to the North Node (Our Truth) from Uranus (True Self) and Neptune (Our Culture).

The Avocado Seed

December 6, 2015

If you’ve seen an Avocado seed sprout, you know how they split into two very solid Half-Spheres.  Like Isaiah 24.  Delores Cannon and others have advised that the Earth will split in two as well.  If we are tripped right off the cliff as the 1% complete their TPP/TTIP coup to eliminate civil government and replace it with corporate sovereignty, and finish propagandizing the rest of us to worship the God of Quarterly Profit too, will there be another Half-Sphere that we can jump to, the way at the last minute Indiana Jones or James Bond would have?  Or an Ascension like the license plate brackets “In the event of Rapture this car will be unmanned”?

A characteristic of Neptune, recall, is that Confusion reigns when we see through Avocado Eyes, but Clarity when we use our Third Eye.  The Third Eye reads Energy rather than Matter, reading the Wave-Partical Duality.  If we look at the Shimmering rather than the hologram of the Shimmering, can the Energy split into two Waves, like the Tibetan Monks singing two notes at once…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCFCeJTEzNU

Unless we study with Bryan (http://www.bryandeflores.com/NewParadigm.html) or Drunvalo (http://www.liloumace.com/Plasma-Beings-are-showing-us-ascension-part-2-of-3-Drunvalo-Melchizedek_a2302.html) or Delores (http://www.dolorescannon.com/blog/) or Gene (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jDFI87zn9t0) or the like, or remember how we got here, we don’t have the conceptual framework to understand how to translate from Matter to Energy.

Nevertheless, we need to do the best we can to try to imagine it (thanks to Soulspeak for the link)…

https://newhumanitypress.wordpress.com/2015/12/05/dimensional-doorway/

It’s a fundamental part of our “Cognitive Dissonance” Both/And practice – in order to keep our brain from ossifying, we practice holding Mutually Contradictory Perspectives at the same time.  It also helps to keep our Perspective from sinking into Fundamentalism, where we Believe our metaphors are literally True rather than useful descriptions.  If you know nothing more than the electromagnetic spectrum, you understand how incredibly limited Huper perception is, and you can’t help but understand that ALL mental descriptions are metaphors.

Of course we all hold Mutually Contradictory Perspectives, but most of them are Unconscious.  How else could someone call themselves “Christian” while spouting Hate and Fear?  Bringing our own personal Mutually Contradictory Perspectives into Consciousness is how we reduce Self-Sabotage.  But it also behooves to seek new Mutually Contradictory Perspectives beyond our usual domains.  The more Perspectives we can learn and maintain, the better our chances of staying Grounded and Present and being able to Respond instead of Reacting, no matter how strange the Avocado gets.

Heiros Gamos

November 1, 2015

Here’s a great review for Monday’s Mars-Venus Conjunction.  As you read it you may be asking, “Where’s the Mars half,” but that’s the point.  With 2007 OR10 – Becoming Conscious of our Unconscious Beliefs – Stationary in a Culture where we’re programmed by the Patriarchy, of the Patriarchy, and for the Patriarchy, the Magnetic is largely Unconscious even for many folks of the Feminine persuasion.  And for folks of the Dynamic persuasion this is all the more important, because without Sovereignty for your Inner Female, mind leads you astray into all manner of Self-Sabotaging and Planet-Destroying Traumadrama, and we aren’t that far from another Atlantean Tripping Point…

https://judithkusel.wordpress.com/2015/10/31/1050/ 

With thanks again to Soulspeak for the introduction.

While OR10 doesn’t Stand Still till 19 November, in fact these Plutoids and Sednoids could be considered to be Stationary all of the time – at its current distance from the Sun, OR10 averages only one Degree every four years.  It took three years (2005-7; it was “Discovered” in 2007) just for it to transition from Aquarius (Becoming Conscious of our Unconscious Idealism) to Pisces (Becoming Conscious of our Unconscious Emotions).  That’s why these dwarf planets are Unconscious – when something doesn’t change, or changes very slowly, we take it for granted that it’s a constant.  Till it changes.  Growth in Consciousness occurs not by Discovery, but by Differentiation of new shapes from the Background that’s been there all along.  As long as the Wolf didn’t move, you didn’t distinguish it from the trunk of the Tree next to it.  Two of the corners of the Grand Sextile in the OR10 “Discovery” chart are Conjunctions between Lilith and Chariklo, and between the Moon and Venus.  That’s a strong emphasis on the Feminine.  

Sustainability

October 31, 2015

No guarantees that this free series of videos on Sustainability starting today (1 November) will be dynamite, but I can vouch for several of the interviewees…

http://theshiftnetwork.com/blog/2015-10-23/creating-heaven-earth-search-sustainability 

A bit early for the Saturn-Neptune Square, since it’s not exact till 26 November and there’s a lot going on between now and then; it’s likely to be at least 20 November before we feel it unadulterated, and that’s only if we’ve Embraced and Let Go of all of the other intervening Energies.  But Saturn is within two Degrees of Squaring Neptune, and we usually arbitrarily draw the Sensitivity line for interplanetary Angles at three Degrees, so we have to consider the Waning Saturn-Neptune Square to be Present in the background.  The Saturn-Neptune Cycle is about Redefining the Culture.  Neptune today (1 November) is only five Arcminutes from its 18 November Station, and we usually arbitrarily draw the Sensitivity line for Stations at one Degree, so we’re well within the realm of the Neptune-Station Energy as well.  Neptune Stations are about Shifting our Perceptions of the World around us, particularly our Relations with our Culture.

Astrologers call it “orb,” we call it “Sensitivity,” and another apt name for it would be “slop.”  Most of us don’t feel astrological Angles as discrete points, we feel them as Energies gradually increasing up to the point where the Angle is exact, then falling off rapidly after that.  If we’re Conscious of the Energy.  If we aren’t Conscious of it and we Blame it on some element of our Material Lives, and make Decisions based on that Blame, we can carry the Energy into the Future, sometimes a long way into the Future.

21st Century II – Boundaries, Forgiveness, Mirrors

October 21, 2015

A reader asked what I meant in the previous post by “Expanding Boundaries,” whether that meant “Loosening Boundaries.”  I responded…

“Could go either way – Boundaries are tricky.  Expanding them might mean for instance less generalization or ‘profiling’ but fattening them against an individual.  It could mean moving the fence closer to the sidewalk.  Or it could mean ‘Loosening’ but in specific circumstances.  How’s that for Waffling?  Got any Maple Syrup? 

“Forgiveness isn’t a Choice, it’s a Discovery; one day we notice that we seem to have Forgiven someone.  Safety First.  And Trust Instinct.  Then (when Safe) examine Judgment to see if it has merit or is an obsolete Pattern.  If somebody keeps Sliming you, Expand the Diatomaceous Earth zone.”

They wrote back to describe an encounter with a local Bully, summarizing with…

“Luckily I had my mirror with me and discreetly maneuvered it into position to face them, trying to breathe while staying present and grounded.  I’ve really never encountered anything quite so nasty, even in my years in politics.  It’s weird, but clearly it seems to be what’s on my plate, for now at least.”

The problem with Intimidation, from the Victim side, is that when the significant adults in our childhood Bullied us traumatically or chronically (“for our own good” or “because they loved us”), they didn’t just leave a cognitive scar that we can “talk ourselves out of,” they carved a Hole in our Aura.  As we get closer to the Yintegrity Finale in June 2016, our Guidance may well put us in positions of “never having encountered anything quite so nasty,” simply because when we don’t get the Golden Apples the first several times, our Guidance has to escalate.

It was never fair to begin with, and we still Resent having to Claim our Space “by hand” rather than automatically.  In addition, while we were being programmed, we were punished and threatened and shamed when we did try to Claim our Space.  And, not wanting to focus on the bummer, and punished when we did (“straighten up or I’ll really give you something to cry about”), we forced it into the Unconscious, so now all we remember is that we can’t do that, it’ll be worse if we do.  And there are probably ample mostly-Unconscious reinforcements from Parallel or Past Lives.

So it’s not easy to push ourselves to do this.  But we have to do it, and we have to persist at it, because that’s how we develop new Habits.  When we were Bullied or worse by those who had Power Over us, we Opened that Robot-Control Hole in our Aura in order to make our then-Life easier.  Current-Moment Bullies can “see” the Hole, probably Unconsciously, and enjoy the Power Over when they reach through it to pull our puppetstrings.  We have to see the Bullies as Guidance.  We aren’t “Blaming the Victim” here (another popular Defense against Claiming our Power), we’re helping the Victim to begin paving a new Life Path.

One way to plug to Hole is simply to fill it with our own Energy.  Holes like this are often in the back of our Third Chakra, behind the Solar Plexus (Power).  Bring Starlight from your favorite Star down your back, and Earthlight from the center of the Earth up through your feet and legs, and allow them to tumble together once or twice in the bowl of your pelvis.  Then bring the combined Energy up over your Belly and right through your Solar Plexus, booming out the back like a jet engine.  Practice this when you aren’t being Bullied, so you don’t have to think much about it when you are Bullied.  Some Energy Schools would rather you ran the Energy back to front.  Try it both ways and see which one makes you feel more Solid.

Do this a lot, and you’ll get in a lot of fights.  So move the Energy through some of your other Chakras as well, especially the Fourth or Heart Chakra (Compassion) and First or Root Chakra (base of the Spine, Worthiness).  If you want to continue to have a Relationship with anyone who seems to purposely make you feel “bad,” including your partner, lover, boss, kids, employer, parents, friends, etc. – Heart Shaped Eyes tells the story…

https://heartshapedeyes.wordpress.com/2015/10/21/passive-aggressive/ 

– then fill your Second (Belly, Emotion) and Fifth Chakra (Neck, Communication) as well.  You don’t want Analysis and Empathy yet, you want Protection, so leave out the Sixth (Third Eye, Intuition) and Seventh (top of the Head, Spirit) Chakras for now.

Once when I was on the phone with a Bully to whom I was very vulnerable and with whom I didn’t want to argue (a losing proposition with Bullies, and boring), I carefully and persistently ran jet engines through both my Third and Fourth Chakras.  The Bully kept stammering, not getting the reactions they were looking for, and didn’t know how to proceed.  Meanwhile, I was sweating like a pig, not because I was alarmed or scared, just from the Energy.  It’s not their fault – they were raised that way.  It may be their Responsibility to eventually notice how it impacts their Life, if that fits into their plans for the Lifetime – maybe their Soul’s Plan is to Change the World by expressing their Pathological Genius, like Steve Jobs, and they need their Bully to pull it off.  

Our reader mentioned having their Mirror handy.  This is another Powerful technique.  Imagine a wardrobe Mirror, and imagine holding it up between you and the Bully, facing them.  Their Energy bounces off and goes right back to them.  I’ve had people tell me they can’t do that because it will hurt the Bully!  Excuses abound!  Many Bullies are so used to this that they’ll just go around, so be prepared to Expand your Mirror if need be.  Many will just “come around to the back door.”  For some Bullies you’ll need an Igloo or Superdome of Mirrors.  

You’ll Feel Guilty.  Ground yourself, and send the Guilt down your Grounding Cable, back to the Earth where it can be used for compost.  You can’t Choose Forgiveness, but you can Choose between being Bullied and Feeling Guilty, and I hope you’ll Choose the latter, because it’s easier to slough off.  You may have any number of other Feelings arise.  If your Bully says “Whatsamatta, why you sweating so?  Scared?”  just say it’s a fever.  The less you say the better, as Bullies use conversation to trap you into the Language part of your brain, where you’ll forget to hold your Mirror.

There’s a lot more to say about Mirrors, which we’ll get to later.  For instance, when you’ve tapped bruises into yourself and you still can’t Let Go of a nagging bummer, the Emotion may not be yours.  Take the first person you think of, imagine Mirroring them for a few minutes, and see if your Feelings Change.  If they don’t, take the second person.  Or the person you’re telling yourself “It can’t be them!” – spun sugar tongue.  Or too much Dependence.

No one knows you’re doing this except you.  So there’s no reason this has to alter the rest of your relationship with the person – if it’s your boss, say.  You won’t Change them, you’ll only stop Dancing to their fiddle.  What you’re Changing is the way you React.  If they’re addicted to Bullying they may get bored with your non-Reaction and turn their Attention elsewhere, which might frighten you, and you’ll have to sit with that Fear, or Tap it out (Remember Tapping works just as well when you Imagine it, so you still won’t have to blow your cover).  Most likely they’ll just turn to others for their Bullying and direct a more civil part of their Personality toward you.  If they don’t have a more civil part, and/or your own Pathological Genius isn’t on the same jetway as theirs, you probably need a change of venue anyway.

Another friend had an experience yesterday that was similar to our reader’s, dealing with a local Bully.  They did a Theta Healing on themself, and it worked like a charm; the Bully happened to have a more civil Personality part, and they flipped into it.  You could surround yourself in Light, surround them in Light, Tap on your Feeling of Intimidation, or any number of other “tricks” – whatever works for you.  

Of course the critical juncture, in addition to finding the Motivation to actually Claim your Space, is the part about noticing.  For the first several tries you may be too deep into being Bullied before you remember the Mirror.  Try it anyway.  Even if it’s too late this time, every time you do remember, you’re building a new Habit, and making it easier the next time.  Every time you use the Mirror, it builds the Pattern, and makes it easier next time.  The easier it gets to remember and do, the sooner you’ll remember next time.  It’s a Virtuous Cycle, and it builds on itself quickly.

 These are the Cycles involved with the Pallas  corner of the 1/1/2000 Grand Cross:

  • Moon Waxing Square Pallas (Challenge to Trust Instincts around Judgment – “The storm ended, all Nature rejoices in brilliant sunshine“)
  • Pallas Waxing Square Saturn (Challenge to Change Boundaries around Discipline – “A fully decorated Christmas Tree“)
  • Pallas Opposite Uranus (Apparent dichotomy between Safety and Yintegrity – “A Child is seen being born out of an Egg“)
We can see the root of much of the Fear and Hesitation that we’ve been Experiencing over the last three years around dropping our Masks, and we can see how it’s not just the Uranus-Pluto Cycle, but also an integral part of the Century’s Evolutionary process.  The Christmas Tree may represent the idealized positive Images from our childhood that we Chose to remember over the less savory memories.  Pallas will Square (Mastery through Challenge) the Nodes (Life Path) and Vesta (Unconscious Beliefs) next week (28-30 October, but it makes a Grand Cross with the Moon on 31 October at 2am PDT – http://www.jbuss.com/tt/pdt2.htm ), so this is an excellent time to practice these Skills.

Pathological Genius and Ixion

October 15, 2015

A reader inquires…

“What do you mean by ‘Pathological Genius?’  I sort of feel it, but am still confused about it!”

Which is an excellent question.

The dwarf planet Ixion was named after a fellow who intrigued Zeus because he had no moral compunction whatsoever.   So Zeus made him a God, and he proceeded to try to rape Zeus’s wife Hera (aka Juno) – a perfect metaphor for the Shadow.   Recall that Zeus’s Mission was to destroy the traditional Matriarchy so he could replace it with the Patriarchy. 

I’m not addressing mass murderers or serial rapists here, I’m addressing US.

Whenever we repress any part of our Self, we submerge it into the Unconscious.  It doesn’t go away.  It typically constellates with other repressed material and negative Archetypes and becomes a Sea Monster that appears to constantly try to attack us, or at least persistently try to intrude into Consciousness.  Taurus Freud saw this phenomenon as disruptive to the Ego’s attempt to craft an acceptably acculturated Persona.  If we’re stuck in Scarcity, we may need to pay Attention to this Perspective.  Leo Jung on the other hand saw this phenomenon as the Psyche, seeking Wholeness, attempting to bring the repressed Energy into Consciousness and enlist the Ego to help re-integrate the repressed material.  Freud’s ideal is that a person should “fit in,” while Jung’s is that a person should seek Wholeness.  In Mazlow’s Universe, Freud’s Perspective would come first, Jung’s second.

It’s easy, if your orientation is toward “fitting in,” to see Ixion as symbolic of what we need to be Ashamed of, make Amends for, and otherwise generally keep under the blankets – Lord of the Flies.  On the other hand, if your orientation is toward Wholeness, Ixion represents our Inner Orphan, Victim of Abandonment.  Of course parenting and religioning and domesticating are writ all over these processes.  To distinguish the two we have to back up to the origins of the repression.  Abusive children learn their tactics from abusive adults.  Orphaned children mirror the Abandonment they received.  

Neither one started out as a Monster, except perhaps in the eyes of a severely repressed adult.  The deeper the repression, the more Monster-like the Shadow becomes.  As Karma, repression can accumulate and deepen over a series of Lifetimes.  The deeper the repression, the harder the Shadow tries to get into Consciousness, creating Self-Sabotage and eventually resorting to illness.  That’s a radical Perspective, not to be Confused with the notion that we are to Blame for our own illnesses.  Instead we have to Take Responsibility for our illnesses, and tracking them back to repressed Energy is a Powerful and potentially “Miraculous” part of that process.

Remember always that Responsibility means Able to Respond rather than React.  It does not mean Blame.  Blame looks to the Past to try to attribute Cause; Responsibility looks to the Future to try to improve Outcomes.  Blame is a Manipulation, an attempt at Intimidation, Power Over, and Competition.  Blame is a Bully.  Responsibility is an aspect of Power With and Collaboration.  Blame is a Universe unto itself; when you’re IN Blame, it’s very difficult to see out of it.  Learn to Discern it.

Ixion is these days traveling in the company of dwarf planet and Centaur Pholus, which represents Taking Full Responsibility.  We are Healers, which means that above all we should do no harm.  So if our Inner Monster has done harm, Taking Full Responsibility does mean a searching and fearless inventory and Amends where necessary.  To do that we’ll need to carefully Discern Guilt over “victimless crimes” and other places were we violated someone’s irrational rule but did no actual harm, from places where we actually did harm someone.  That Discernment and Self-Forgiveness is a bigger part of Healing than the Amends.  

But there is another strong intergenerational process that we haven’t considered yet.  Consider the astrological Square, or Mastery through Challenge.  Working with our Squares is never Satisfying.  But it is always Educational.  “We” (on the Soul level) Chose Squares in our current Lifetime because we really wanted to Explore some subject very thoroughly.  We don’t generally give ourselves credit for the Mastery inherent in our Squares, because it never feels like a job well done.  But if we look at our Squares objectively, we see that our root objective has been to Explore the subject at ever deeper and ever more subtle levels.  The lack of Satisfaction simply provides the Motivation to do so.

“Our” (soul level) choice of parents and other significant adults works in a similar fashion.  If we really want to bring something up into Consciousness in a Lifetime, arrange for it to be repressed.  It won’t leave you alone until you Consciously Embrace it as your own.  So we “hire” parents to help repress our Deepest Desires and our Greatest Skills.  We flail and flail against those repressions till we finally realize that we’re fighting ourself, and surrender to allowing our Orphans to come home and take their proper role at the head of our internal household.

So while a small portion of our own personal Ixion, our Pathological Genius, will be Amendable harm that we have perpetrated, the largest portion of it will be the Skills and Desires that we wanted most to bring into Consciousness in the Lifetime.  

You can think of Ixion as a photographically negative image of your North Node.  

“It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.  Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.  We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?  Actually, who are you not to be?  You are a child of God.  Your playing small does not serve the world.  There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.  We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.  It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.  As we are liberated from our own fear, Our presence automatically liberates others.”  —Marianne Williamson, Return to Love

We repress our Genius by “hiring” significant Others who will Shame us for it, so it appears to us to be Pathological.

Sustainable or Else

July 14, 2015

PlutoMinus5The Angel of Pluto, from five days away (NASA-JHUAPL-SWRI).

About half a day before the New Moon, and about a day after the New Horizons trolley sails within several thousand miles of Pluto, the Moon crosses Mercury and Mars, which closely Oppose Pluto.  Of course that’s about the time when NASA will first unveil some of the portraits that New Horizons snapped at close range.  So we’d expect that…

Pluto will have something very distinct and very adamant to say on July 15th.

Meanwhile, that New Moon!

I hope we all graduated from our Self-Love SATs with flying colors.

Because the New Moon falls right into the same Degrees!  Jupiter’s now in the 25th Degree of Leo, so it’s no longer within our usual 3 Degrees of Sensitivity to the other members of the would-be Grand Sextile.  But with the New Moon at 24 Cancer the focus of the current chart, we take three Degrees on either side, or 21-27 Degrees.  Which gives us nine out of twelve points on a Grand Unx.

The Unx, recall, is the Twelfth Harmonic, or the Angle between two planets that are one Sign apart.  The Grand Unx then is a planet in the same (or close to the same) Degree of all twelve Signs.  The Twelfth Harmonic is the Pattern-Breaker, or the Hanged Person; not hanging by the neck or fingernails, but hanging by the ankles and hence seeing the World through different Perspectives.

Last week’s Grand Sextile was ruled by the Station of Haumea – Rebirth, and the Vacancy – the warm and comfortable rug in the nursery; a Rebirth into Self-Love.  This week it’s Eris that’s Stationary, now within three Degrees from Uranus and now turning Retrograde to move back toward Uranus, and almost exactly Square to the New Moon.  Eris turns Direct on July 19.  This is one focus of the would-be Grand Unx…

A major theme this week will be the Revelation of Denial.  Don’t hide from it behind embarrassment or Shame.  Seek it out.  Use your Curiosity, Actively.  “I wonder what I’ve been Denying!?!?  I’ll wager if I open up to it Lovingly, and Ask for Grace, I can stop sabotaging myself and get on with my Dreams, eh?  Won’t that be Grand!”

And sure enough, there’s Chiron in the almost-Grand Unx.  That’s exactly what Chiron’s about, transcending Limiting Beliefs by Breaking up Patterns that have been sabotaging and discouraging us, and exposing us to the Miracles that lie on the other side of the Limiting-Belief curtain.

The other focus of the Grand Unx is the Ixion-Pholus-Quaoar Stellium in 22-27 Sagittarius.  It’s a major focus because it’s the outlier – the other eight points are one Sign apart, and the Stellium is two Signs distant on one side and three Signs distant on the other.  The eight adjacent points form a bowl or curved mirror, focusing everything back onto the outlier, like the focus of a Reflecting Telescope.

The Ixion-Pholus-Quaoar Stellium, all of which are Retrograde, says…

We are Required to Take Responsibility.  It’s no longer optional.  Our Survival depends on it.  No matter how many of our philosophical or moral or political or hedonistic precepts it violates, we have to take Responsibility.  It is now The Law, and it will be enforced by the Power of the Galaxy.

We didn’t notice, but Quaoar, which itself represents The Law-Giver, slipped past the Galactic Center on January 12 of this year.  After turning Retrograde, it crossed again on June 19.  It’s third and final crossing will be November 24.  Quaoar represents Natural Law, Law of the sort where violations don’t get you in trouble, they get you dead.  That’s just Quaoar by itself; now it has the Authority of the Galaxy behind it.

We intuit the theme of Sustainability because that’s the sort of Law that Quaoar gives.  Ceres (Sustainability), though, is the focus of a Mjolnir (Epiphany) across the Square from Lilith (PIAVA) to Chaos (Unlimited Potential).

We had our Can-Opener in January, and our Exposition in June.  By now we should have learned a good deal about what Unconscious contents are forcing themselves out into the Light.  We have until late November to allow those urges to permeate our Life.  It doesn’t matter if we’re Ashamed of them, or if they violate what we believe to be Sacred, or if they open a chasm between us and our Community.  We have no choice but to honor them, or they will rip us to shreds.  There is great Grace available to us here; take advantage of it, as it will last only till about July 26.

The Stellium makes a Grand Trine with Uranus-Eris and Jupiter, but Jupiter moves beyond three Degrees from Eris around the 26th, just as Uranus is Stationary, and Venus is turning Retrograde in the first Degree of Virgo.  The first Degree of Virgo is itself a Pattern-Breaker, though it usually feels more like an Ego-Buster.  Which is exactly what a Pattern-Breaker is, since it’s Ego that we have invested in our Limiting Beliefs.

We need to be practicing our Skill at recognizing Ego Death.  When it feels like “I am Dying,” shift your focus.  It’s “I am Dying,” as in “My Old, worn-out Ego is Dying.”  May it rest in Peace.  It’s served me well, getting me this far, but Lord Knows it’s tired out! 

Okay, it doesn’t feel like a Sunny day in the park, but that’s what Rebirth feels like.  I Loved my Old Ego, and it Loved me, and I’ll miss it.  We were best friends.  It’ll take a while to get used to this new Ego, and I won’t always know how to Act or Feel.  I’ll be Confused and clumsy.  I guess that’s what it’s like Learning anything new though. It’s okay to be embarrassed; we’re newbies.  I need to be my own best Cheerleader. 

“Hooray New Ego!  We’ve got some Learning Curve to get through here, but the Future is Wide Open, and we’re looking forward to Manifesting some great things that we’ve been Dreaming about for a long time.”  Set your Doingness aside; that’s your Old Ego.  No Stress allowed here; it’s Rest you want to pursue instead.  Sure, some folks pop up off the Birthing table and go right back to their CEO jobs the next day – and in the process Abandon their progeny – which here means Abandoning yourself. 

Let the Future come to you; if you strive to go after it, you can only do that under your Old Ego’s terms, and you’ll revert back to your Limiting Beliefs.  Use your PIAVAs instead

Confusion is the first stage of Growth – don’t try to overcome it or think your way out of it.  Celebrate it!  “Oh gosh, there’s Confusion!  Happy Day!  We’ve escaped our Birdcage and we’re flying free!” 

Which of course could mean the Cat isn’t far away – “Oh gosh, there’s Fear!  Happy Day!  We’re encountering unfamiliar turf and about to Break Through to New Heights – all we have to do is Breathe, and maybe Tap a bit, eh?” 

And maybe backpedal a little – Safety First!  We want to take Risks, that’s what Learning is about, but we don’t want to overextend ourself, because that will set us back.  We may want to PIAVA a Loving and Gentle Learning Experience, Growth, Rebirth, AND Safety.

Wait – is that Discouragement, or even Despair?  Where did that come from?  Oh yeah, all Losses must be Grieved, even the Loss of an Old worn-out Ego suit.  Hey, I remember!  I need to Empathize with my Despair – “You poor Sweetheart, you’re feeling down, aren’t you.  That’s okay, Honey, I won’t Abandon you, take as long as you need to Feel into that.” 

Don’t try to talk yourself out of what you’re Feeling; instead, step outside yourself, look back, and Witness what you’re really Feeling, but from outside of it.  Shift from “I am Discouraged” to “I feel Discouraged” – it’s a tiny semantic shift and a giant step for personal Growth. 

There are two of you occupying the same Body – the first You Feels Discouraged, and the second You Feels Loving Kindness toward the first You that’s in Despair.  There’s no attempt to Change what you’re Feeling, only a shift in your Perspective, a Loving Witness, a shift in your Assemblage Point, an instant Rebirth.

The Sky is the Limit here, as Chaos (Unlimited Potential, not Disorder) Opposes the Ixion-Pholus-Quaoar Stellium, and the Lilith-Chiron Opposition joins it for a Grand Cross.  The Stellium says, “This is the Law“;  Chaos says “Go for the Gold“; Lilith says “Let it Come to You, don’t chase it“; and Chiron says “Be the Witness.”  The Grand Cross says “There’s too much going on and too much at stake for us to get stuck on any one thing here; we have to Let Go and Let God!”

And don’t forget all that Grace, in the Grand Trine between the Stellium, Uranus-Eris, and Jupiter, in the Fire Signs – in Spirit.  The Grand Cross is in the Mutable signs – Mutable as in Mutation…

We’re Changing here, we all are.  All bets are off.  Look for any Expectations, and Cancel-Neutralize-Upgrade them.  Cancel the Expectation, Neutralize the Vibration it Created, and Upgrade the Expector – Expectorate your Expectations.  All Expectations arise from your Old Limited Ego, whether they’re cynical or hopeful. 

Hopeful Expectations are Fantasies, and Fantasies are not PIAVAs.  Fantasies have Limitation at their core.  Otherwise we would have Manifested them all along.  You don’t know how the Future will unfold, because we haven’t Co-Created it yet.  Intentions and Desires, by all means, but Expectations are Manifestation killers.

Makemake (Manifestation) and Vesta (Belief) both meet the North Node (Mission), on the Cusp of Libra, in mid-September.  The Cusp of Libra is where we meet Other for the first time, or as if for the first time.  As we integrate the newly emerging formerly-Unconscious contents into our everyday Lives, we’ll begin to newly integrate them into our Relationships as well.

Without Curiosity there is no Love.  If your Relationships are based on Expectation, they’ll be mired in Judgment rather than Celebration and Freedom and Exploration.  Begin to watch for Expectation in your Relationships, and Expect your Expectations to be incomplete, if not downright incorrect.  “Aha, there’s Expectation!  I wonder what that would look like if I opened to Curiosity about what was really going on for them?”  Not Curious as in “I need to find an answer,” but Curious as in “Wow, that’s Awesome!  I wonder what I’ll discover next?”

The Grand Cross and the Grand Trine make up six of the nine points of the would-be Grand Unx.  The corner they share is the Stellium – another reason to consider it a major focus of the chart.  It would be the major focus were Eris not Stationary and about to make a once-in-a-century Initiation of Uranus, which will open a whole panoply of new Channels between us and our Soul.

The seventh point is the New Moon – which is itself a major Focus, as a New Moon is always a Rebirth.  The presence of the New Moon in the almost-Grand Unx is what calls it forth into our Attention.  And speaking of Rebirth, the eighth point is Haumea, the Stationary focus of last week’s almost-Grand Sextile.

The ninth point is Sedna – Actions taken out of Fear.  It’s well placed, the focus of a Yod from Haumea and the Stellium.  The Yod says,

“Be mindful of Fear, and don’t let it control your Actions.  It you’re Present with your Fear, Witness it, Empathize with yourself when you Feel it, and don’t try to think yourself out of it or make it Go Away, then you’ll find its source, and Clear it, and it will no longer Limit you.”

Sedna and the New Moon are the roots of the Diamond Star that’s focused on the Stellium and its T-Square with Chiron and Lilith – another reason to make the Stellium a major focus of the chart.

A final note – Responsibility is not Blame.  Blame looks at the Past and tries to attribute Cause.  Responsibility looks at the Future and tries to improve Outcomes.  They are totally different.  It’s very difficult to escape the concepts of Blame and Cause and Effect, because we’ve been trained from infancy to Believe that they’re the Operating Principles of Reality.  They aren’t.  They’re the Operating Principles of the Left Brain, and the Operating Principles of Immature Emotions.  Reality Operates on the Principle of “This just Is, and that’s that.”  If you can approach the World with Perennial Curiosity rather than Expectation, you’ll find it to be full of Surprise, Delight, and Awe, not Blame or Causality.

Turmoil and Sickness and Pain

July 1, 2015

ucite4996bpUranocircite – Barium Uranyl Phosphate Hydroxide.  Quite a lovely Crystal, tempting us to try to harness the Power of the Uranium in it.  Pluto was discovered about the same time as the Bomb.  Like the hubris that destroyed Atlantis, attaching the Ego to Powers that are larger than we can handle, will destroy us.

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A reader asks,

“There is so much turmoil and sickness and pain going around these days.  Is it something in the stars?”

There’s a hypothesis that all Pain is caused by Resistance.  I confess that I intuitively lean toward viewing the World that way, but I also recognize that the idea can be used Politically for untoward purposes, and many (who don’t actually understand the hypothesis) refer to it as “New Age Guilt.”  And I don’t assume that everyone runs on the same processes.  So it would be more accurate to say that some folks experience Resistance as Pain.  I do know that for myself, when I’m able to devote my entire Attention directly into Pain – which is to say, when I quit Resisting – the Pain dissolves.  But Curiosity is always a much better approach than Generalization.

And there are a lot of things going on “in the Stars” that could generate Resistance.  For instance, we referred to Portal 1-5.7.15 ( https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/2015/06/26/portals-1-7-15-and-5-7-15-self-love/ ), which Energy persists for the first ten days of July, as Healing any lack of Self-Love.  Lack of Self-Love doesn’t arise spontaneously; it arises because we’re taught that parts of ourself are not Lovable.  So when “the Stars” suggest that Self-Love is being Reborn, that may create Conflict with our Programming and our Identity, and could, if we weren’t prepared or if the Conflict was strong enough, dump us into Ego Death, which we may well Experience as “turmoil and sickness and pain.”

Even today’s Full Moon has a good deal of Energy that could generate Resistance. 

The Sun is on Mars and the Moon on Pluto, and the Full Moon Squares the Nodes.

By and large, Resisting Pluto is seldom a pleasant experience, and Mars calls us to Action.  Under this Moon we could easily Act in ways that graphically illustrate for us our Limiting Beliefs.  If we Experience “the Stars” as our Teachers, we’ll be Grateful for the opportunity to bring them into Consciousness where we can reconsider them.  But if we Resist that Perspective for any reason – because we have another agenda, we resent Surrendering Control, etc. – then we could Experience this as the Universe sabotaging us, rather than our Limiting Beliefs sabotaging us, which they do continually in order to help us become Conscious, since we can’t Change them while they remain Unconscious.  We could easily Experience that as “turmoil and sickness and pain.”

The Full Moon Grand Cross is ameliorated by two Tricolors across the North Node to Sun-Mars Square: Sun-Mars Quincunx to Ceres and North Node Quincunx to Neptune.

And two Tricolors across the Sun-Mars to Vesta-South Node Square: Vesta-South Node Quincunx to the asteroid Atlantis and Sun-Mars Quincunx to the asteroid Hybris (Hubris).

The Tricolor is a Square and a Quincunx and a Trine connected end to end, so named because we happen to draw those three Angles with different colors.  The Tricolor is a Bridge across the Square, because by maintaining Curiosity about how the three planets will interact, we invoke the Grace of the Trine.  When we try to force Understanding instead of ongoing Curiosity, we remain stuck in the Challenge of the Square.  That can contribute to Mastery, but it makes Life more difficult than it need be.

For instance, the Tricolor Mars Square Vesta Quincunx Atlantis Trine Mars would be interpreted as suggesting that we focus on Curiosity about how our Beliefs (Vesta) may be granting ourselves and our Actions (Mars) too much Power (Atlantis), or Curiosity about how we might Surrender into Merging with a Power greater than ourself.

Since our preferred approach is to suggest ways to Heal “turmoil and sickness and pain,” we would suggest that we strive or PIAVA to maintain Curiosity around…

  • Actions that might Permanently eliminate Self-Sabotage
  • How we might Surrender into the Learning Opportunity that’s available
  • How our Unconscious Beliefs sabotage us by granting too much Power to the Ego and not enough Power to the Soul
  • How we can direct our Actions to breaking Patterns of assuming our Ego has more Power than it actually does

Like Love, Curiosity is Sacred because it eschews Judgment – as long as we maintain it as ongoing Curiosity, rather than as a drive to try to make sense of the World intellectually.  The intellect is Dualistic; the World is multidimensional.  The intellect can imprison Reality, but it lacks the tools to make sense of it.

We’re now firmly in the second phase of the Uranus-Pluto Cycle.  How many of us are totally Committed to some form of Yintegrity or Radical Honesty or uncompromising Self-Love?  Or do we still occasionally give away our Power and allow someone else to have Sovereignty over our Life?  If we’re still in Resistance to our Yintegrity, that could easily be a source of Pain.  And Uranus is only three Degrees and seven Minutes from Eris today – so we can expect to begin Experiencing all manner of Identity-threatening Insights about where our Commitment to Yintegrity isn’t complete.

Then there’s the intriguing possibility that the New Horizons spacecraft, which will buzz within a few thousand miles of Pluto in two weeks, is having a Psychic impact upon us.  As without so within.  Throughout prehistory and history Humans have personalized external objects as sources of Power and volition.  While modern religion and science disparage this as “superstition,” that’s simply an Either/Or Political reflection of their small Egos.  If we respect the Perspective of folks whose relationship to their environment was a lot more sustainable than our own, we need to take this process of granting Power to Symbols seriously, just as a substantial portion of modern psychology does.

Pluto represents the darkest portion of our Psyche, the Portal through which we move from one Lifetime to the next, figuratively or literally.  And we’ve entered that secret Portal with a flashlight, like having a probe – or an icepick – inserted into the deep recesses of the brain, without understanding what we’re doing.  How will the Living Portal respond?  Are we really ready as a species to uncover these secrets?  I took an NLP course once and in the second session one of the participants described having three car wrecks since the first session.  The instructor said she “couldn’t imagine what that might have to do with NLP” – which was either a bald lie or illustrated her total ignorance of psychology. 

The Psyche is always in Balance – whatever is out of Balance in Consciousness is Balanced in the Unconscious – and vice versa.  Opening up the Unconscious without preparation and guidance invites a psychotic Break – wrecking your car is actually “getting off easy.”  We manifest Exterior Reality, with its turmoil and sickness and pain and joys and adventures and surprises, as a buffer, so we can pretend like we’re dealing with exogenous Forces and avoid Responsibility for what would Overwhelm us.  But one of the Transitions that occurred in 2012 was Gaia’s retirement as the Identity of our Planet, and her replacement by Pi, and Pi is all about Responsibility.

This is the background behind the 2012-2015 Uranus-Pluto Square and the 2016 Eris-Uranus Initiation.  As the Illusion of Separation between Matter and Spirit fades, Material “Reality” as a buffer between Ego and Soul – the Veil – becomes transparent.  If that process happens too fast, or if we dally too long in Denial, then to remain in Balance, the contents of the Unconscious have to force their way through into Consciousness.  The stage of “turmoil and sickness and pain” is a phase where we still have the option to Take Responsibility, become Conscious of Ego Death, and focus on the Rebirth.  If we insist on Resistance, “Breakdown” eventually follows.  You can see that happening on the cultural level in many places on the Planet.

Responsibility is not Blame.  Blame looks into the Past to try to attribute Cause.  Responsibility looks into the Future to try to Change outcomes.  Taking Responsibility for turmoil and sickness and pain is in no sense the same as Accepting Blame for it.  Taking Responsibility for discomfort involves Stopping what we’re Doing, Paying Attention to the source of our Discomfort, and Embracing it Lovingly.  There may be an intellectual component to that, such as accepting a Fever as a “cleansing Fire” that’s purifying our Body.  But it’s mostly Attentional. 

Stop right now and Ask yourself, where in (or not) my Body does my Identity, my sense of Self, reside just now?  For instance, most of my own Self-Identity currently resides in my First and Sixth Chakras, as my butt is heavy in my chair, and I strain through my forehead to Intuit what to write.  There’s a whiff of Me in my Heart too.  Any discomfort in my Body?  Yes, a burning sensation at the back of my throat, up toward the nasal passages, a vestige of my recent bout of flu (which I did not Take Responsibility for at the time) and allergies.  So what happens when I put all of my Attention into that discomfort? 

That’s what Taking Responsibility means here – instead of trying to ignore it or medicate it away, to Stop and Be Lovingly Present with it, to see what it has to say to me.  When I do that for a few moments, the pressure in my skull (which other than the strain to Intuit I hadn’t noticed) drains out through my nose, and my Psyche gently says, “It’s time to Rest!”  And the discomfort fades away.

Portals 1.7.15 and 5.7.15 – Self-Love?

June 26, 2015

krk14Who else but Richard Brautigan.

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Gay Hendricks has a concept called “Upper Limits,” where, if you start Enjoying Life more than your Limiting Beliefs would like you to, you self-sabotage.  His suggested response is that, when we get into new Enjoyment territory, we slow down, take it easy, rest a lot, pay attention to our physical requirements like food and water, and give ourselves time to Integrate.  If we start slowing down when we get Excited, rather than waiting till we self-sabotage, we may be able to avoid the sabotage entirely.  Not to back away from the Excitement and Enjoyment, just to mellow into it. 

Anybody hitting a wall here?  Or sailing high? 

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The fastest corner of our Almost-Grand-Sextile is Jupiter, so it will stretch at least through the first ten days of July.  The corners are Uranus-Eris, Chaos, Venus-Jupiter, Haumea, Pholus-Ixion, and the “Nursery Rug” Vacancy, “so the children can play in comfort and warmth.”

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Jupiter Initiates Venus at 1am PDT ( http://www.jbuss.com/tt/pdt1.htm ) on 1 July in 22 Leo, “A carrier pigeon fulfilling its mission.”

We can read Venus-Jupiter as Self-Love.  Or alternately, especially considering the other players in the Grand Sextile, Healing any lack of Self-Love.

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Haumea is Stationary, and on 5 July it turns Direct in 21 Libra, at half-past 2am PDT ( http://www.jbuss.com/tt/pdt2.htm ).  This isn’t Haumea’s first venture in the Gemini Duad of Libra – that started in December 2012 – but this Shadow Period pretty well spans the Gemini Duad, which begins the Gemini Decanate.

The Shadow Period is the time, and Zodiacal space, that a Retrogradation takes, including the planet’s first crossing the space before it goes Retrograde, and then traversing the space for the third time after it goes Direct.  Suppose a Retrogradation covers 21-23 Libra.  That’s the Shadow Period in space.  The Shadow Period in time begins when the planet first gets to 21 Libra, before the Retrograde Station, and ends when it clears 23 Libra for the second time, after it has gone Retrograde and then gone Direct again.  So while a Retrogradation might cover a month, the Shadow Period will be closer to three months.

Haumea itself is about Rebirth.  As Pele’s daughter, Haumea is red hot and very raw.  We want to give her lots of space, so she can cool off and congeal.  We can map Haumea through the Libra Decanates…

  • Libra Decanate of Libra – Rebirth into Meeting Other – 1995 to 2005
  • Aquarius Decanate of Libra – Rebirth into Community – 2005 to 2015
  • Gemini Decanate of Libra – Rebirth into Experimental Uses of Community

Haumea began this Shadow Period in October 2014, and turned Retrograde in January 2015.  So we’ve had two iterations of this exercise, and now we’ll put the finishing touches onto what we’ve learned.

A critical issue has been how much we’re willing to compromise our Yintegrity for the sake of Community.  Or alternatively, how much we’re willing to risk Community for the sake of our Yintegrity.  Ideally, Community and Yintegrity would be mutually supportive, Win-Win.  How many of us are close to that?  We might think of it as testing our Community.

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The other three corners here are not slouches.

Pholus-Ixion is about how much Responsibility we take, how much Power we take (for good or ill), how much Privilege we demand, how much Abuse we take, how much Consciousness we maintain.  Lots of interaction terms between these parameters, Self-Love, and Rebirth in Community.

Chaos is about Unlimited Potential.  We’re Co-Creating a New Planet here.  Where are the Edges between our Demands and our Requests as we negotiate the Boundaries?  As we dance between Yintegrity and Community, why aren’t we Demanding everything we Want?

Uranus-Eris is about clearing away additional layers of Denial so that our Yintegrity deepens by leaps and bounds.  If our Community doesn’t support our Yintegrity, our Community will get the short end of the stick.

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Then there’s the Vacancy.  It says…

Remember Upper Limits?  Take darn good care of yourSelf, your physical vehicle, and your Inner Child as you move through all of these Rebirths.  Your skin – physical and Identity – will feel molten for a while, and you want to give it time to solidify before the next wave hits.  If you can!  Be very gentle with yourself for the next several weeks “so the children can play in comfort and warmth.”

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Then there’s the Grand Cross: Chaos, Pholus-Ixion, Chiron, and Lilith, though Lilith moves out of the Grand Cross by early July, leaving just the Chiron T-Square, and Finger of God from Venus-Jupiter and Haumea – an extremely Powerful Chiron Diamond Star in other words.

Without the Yod, we’d have Chiron Square to Chaos and Pholus-Ixion…

Miracles without Limit, if we can overcome a wad of Self-Doubt – Am I taking too much?

With the Yod, we have that “bowl of Grace” under the Opposition between Chaos’s Unlimited Potential and Pholus-Ixion’s Healing of Self-Doubt.  And the bowl of Grace is formed by the two most powerful players in the chart, Venus-Jupiter and Haumea…

Rebirth into Self-Love is available if we’re willing to make the shift to Miracles.  How to do that?  Empathize with yourself while you Feel your Self-Doubt.  Do it as many times as it takes.  Step outside your Feelings and look back in at the part of you that’s overwhelmed by those Feelings.  Look back lovingly.  How old is that Abandoned part of you?  Hold their hand.  Let them know that it’s okay for them to Feel everything they Feel.  Show them that you Love them no matter what. 

Self-Rejection is the deepest part of anyone’s Karma.  It’s a contest between how many times you fall down and how many times you get up.  Tap if it will help, and use your PIAVAs.  But the critical part is who outlasts the other – will your Self-Rejection overcome your Self-Love, or will your Self-Love endure longer than your Self-Hate?  Like pushups, this is about “reps” – be Loving with your worst Self-Rejection, over and over again, till it gets so easy that it’s automatic.  That’s how we build new, “good” Karma – reps.

New Doors, Insights, and Rebirth

August 3, 2014

neph5687bpA Nephrite Jade boulder from Jade Cove in Big Sur, California.  While it seems sad that Jade Cove is no longer home to Jade because all of it has been “collected,” it is powerful that all of this Healing Energy has been distributed around the Planet instead.  Jade Cove still holds the Energy Source, it’s just the Form that’s been sent out to Heal.  While these boulders are the receivers and re-transmitters, the master transmitter still resides at Jade Cove.

Jade is the Witness that allows us to acknowledge and Let Go of the inevitable Grief that naturally follows from Change.  We have to Grieve all Losses, even Loss of Self-Sabotage and Negative Beliefs.  We can’t move forward into the new dawn till we Grieve.  Jade is the Medium that helps us make the transition painlessly.  Jade also stills our Anxiety so we’re better able to hear the “still small voices” that convey our Intuitions and inhabit our Channel.

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As our Venus-Saturn-Chiron Grand Trine rides off into the sunset, a couple of other windows open up.

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Opening New Doors – The Mars Angles

The loudest window, especially if you have natal planetfolk within hailing distance of five degrees of the Fixed Signs, will probably be the Mars-Jupiter Square, with Mercury augmenting Jupiter.  We’ve been through this one twice before, though, so it shouldn’t be a big deal.  It might have undertones of your experience of April, whatever that was.

We’re mopping up any unfinished Yintegrity issues here.  Watch for any sign of Resistance to Shoulds or Have-To’s.  There really is no natural Conflict between our Yangtegity (doing what we said we were going to do or what Others expect us to do) and our Yintegrity (doing what we feel like doing, moment to moment).  The apparent Conflict arises from our childhood Programming, which is almost always a Mirror for our “Past-Life” Patterns, which are almost always Mirrored in our Natality.

Natality being a fancy word for your Birth Chart.

April 2014 was about the close Mars-Jupiter-Uranus-Pluto Grand Cross, which was a major milepost in the 2012-2015 Uranus-Pluto Square – all of which was about Yintegrity.

While this may not always be literally true, it’s a very useful metaphor…

From the Soul’s perspective, “we” chose our parents or other adults that were significant in our childhood, so they could “Program” (or train) us to be Conflicted about our major Life Issues, to keep them “in our face” so we couldn’t waste a Lifetime on trivialities or Other People’s Karma.  

When we encounter “impossibilities” we only need to look around to see that there are many people running around who don’t face the intractable problems that we routinely struggle with.  Sure, they don’t have our Karma.  But the point is, there are a zillion ways to sidestep our persistent Self-Sabotage; we just need to do it in such a way that it Changes our Programming on a fundamental level.

Encountering an obstacle, we PIAVA our way around it.  We just need to keep doing it (with variations and extensions) till the strength of our Intention is greater than the strength of our old Patterns.  Be prepared for your PIAVAs to get more and more complicated.  You may be PIAVAing Abundance one week, Freedom the next week, and Security the week after that.  Don’t just PIAVA Freedom the second week, PIAVA Freedom and Abundance.  In the third week, it’s Security and Freedom and Abundance. 

Karma is complex, or we’d have Let it Go Lifetimes ago.  If you understand you’re Karma intellectually, you’re probably wrong.  You might be seeing one view of one side of it very clearly, like Rashomon or the Elephant and the blind folks.  If you allow the Intellect to adhere you to that one view of that one side, the rest of the Sisiutl will eat you alive.  We need to respond in the moment to each issue as it arises.

I’ll steal this paragraph from a client’s transit reading…

“Mars-Jupiter-Mercury by itself represents an Active (Mars) Curiosity (Mercury) about how to Expand (Jupiter) – for instance by Letting Go of Self-Sabotaging Patterns (even though South Node-Eris has passed its peak, the Curiosity would remain, and since SN-Eris is still well within “orb” or sensitivity, we’ll be inspired to work on anything we didn’t finish in July fairly assiduously.  Mars-Jupiter-Mercury could also mean (and probably will) Active pursuit of Expansion using our new Understanding that we’ve gained from SN-Eris.”

And its translation…

Expect an Active Curiosity about how to Expand for the first week or so of August – for instance by Letting Go of Self-Sabotaging Patterns.  Even though our July Karmic adventures have passed their peak, Curiosity will remain, and since these adventures are still very warm, we’ll be inspired to work on anything we didn’t finish in July.  We can probably also expect to be Actively pursuing Expansion using the new Understandings that we gained from our recent Karmic adventures.

Mars-Jupiter Mirrors April because it’s a further development (the “Confidence-Builder” stage) of April’s astrology.  It mirrors July because we’re being asked to Expand in August after Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs in July.

The Mars-Jupiter Square was Exact August 1, and is within three degrees of Orb from July 21 to August 10.

When two planets form an exact Angle to one another they’re said to be, logically enough, “Exact” or “Complete.”  That event is more or less instantaneous.  However, the impact of the astroevent usually extends over a period of time.  For “Transits,” or planets in the Sky contemporaneously, which we deal with here, we use three degrees of “Orb” – that is, we consider the event to be in effect while the two planets are within three degrees of one another. 

Since folks vary in how they react to an event, and different events impact different individuals differently (often depending on their Natality), we often refer to “Orb” as “Sensitivity.”  One degree of Orb is frequently used for Transits.  We use three degrees in general because by and large, we’re writing for more Sensitive people.  We do sometimes use one degree, for instance, when we’re dealing with Stations.  In a natal chart, the usual Orb is eight degrees for major Angles, less for minor Angles.

When we’re dealing with more than two planets, which is usually the case here since we focus on Configurations (several planets making significant Angles to one another), “Exact” is a more complicated concept.  The span of a Portal is usually the period when all of the planets in the Configuration are within three degrees of making the Exact Angle to one another.

We consider the three degrees when the two (or more) planet are approaching their Exact Angle to one another, to be different from the three degrees when they’re separating from one another.  If we’re conscious and cooperating with the extant Energy, the Angle is “Complete” when it is Exact.  If we’re in Resistance to the Energy, then the Energy drags on.  If we make decisions to protect our Ego while the planets are approaching one another, then it can take years or Lifetimes to unwind – that’s how we create Karma.

For example, this Mars-Jupiter asks us to Actively Expand.  If that’s too threatening to the Ego, we could attempt to protect ourself with Blame or Doctrine.  Suppose we have a deep desire to change the way we obtain our Daily Bread, for instance, only to discover we’ve been made redundant at our current job.  We could easily just Blame immigrants, or make a Decision which devolves to a Doctrine, that Security is not possible on this planet. 

If we make that a recurring Pattern, we add it to our Karma.  As long as we stay in Resistance, justified by our Blame or Doctrine, Mars-Jupiter will keep tapping us on the shoulder.  The impact will dull after the three degrees of separating Orb expire, but it’ll still be there.

The classic example is “9/11.”  The Saturn-Pluto Energy behind it was Exact earlier in that summer, so if we were conscious that we were being advised that The Most Important Thing Was to Pay Attention to the Way the World was Changing, we would have responded with Curiosity about how it was Changing, and recognized that the Crisis Point had already passed.  Au contraire, the Neocons responded by trotting out their pre-written Patriot Act, and initiating a huge – and ongoing – propaganda effort around the themes of Terrorism and Perpetual War.

Mercury’s involved for only a few days.  The bigger process is the Tricolor, as Mercury-Jupiter Quincunxes Neptune which in turn Trines Mars.  In other words…

If you encounter any Hesitation to Expand, or Resistance to it, or Uncertainty about how to proceed (or Anger that you have to Change), respond by going directly to Spirit with PIAVA – that will unlock Grace for you.

The Mars-Jupiter-Neptune Tricolor is with us till August 11.  On August 9, though, Vesta moves into the Mars position, and the Vesta-Jupiter-Neptune Tricolor Portal runs through August 22.

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Insights and Rebirth – The Venus Angles

While Mars-Jupiter will probably be the loudest influence, the more impactful Angles and Configurations revolve around Venus.  Venus teams with the North Node to make a Mjolnir pointing at the Neptune corner of the Mars-Jupiter-Neptune Tricolor.  And of course Venus Squaring the North Node means that it makes a T-Square across the Nodes.  Any T-Square across the Nodes is momentous.

So we actually have two major foci in this chart – Neptune as a corner of the Tricolor and the focus of the Mjolnir, and Venus as the focus of the T-Square and co-conspirator on the Mjolnir.  We know there’s Magic Afoot, because Venus Biseptiles Mars.  The Mjolnir hangs out with us till August 7, and the T-Square till August 8.  The heat comes down on the neighborhoods of Pisces 7 (Neptune) and 20-23 of the Cardinal Signs (Venus-Nodes), should you have any natal folk thereabouts.

The impact is heightened by two dwarf planets on the Nodes – Eris (Exposing Denial) on the South Node, and Haumea (Ms. Manifestation Herself) on the North Node.  The North Node backs across Haumea on September 18.  The gap between them reaches three degrees on August 6 and one degree on September 4.

First off, Epiphanies are available to us this week around our relationship to Spirit, Walking in Beauty, and Manifesting what we need to pursue our Mission.

Second, we’re being asked to make Choices this week.  Some Choices will further our Mission and allow us to learn new ways to Co-Create the tools and resources that will move us closer toward our Mission.  Other Choices will lead to Self-Sabotage.  The important thing to remember is that these Choices are not Either/Or.  They’re Both/And.  If that leads the mind to Confusion, that’s great, because Confusion is the first stage of Growth, and Expansion is the order of the day. 

We haven’t been sabotaging ourselves because we’re masochistic.  We’ve been sabotaging ourselves because some rejected part of our True Self has been trying to get something done that seems to conflict with what our Ego wants, or trying to get our Attention.  Whatever seemingly negative Patterns arise this week, Pay Attention to them.  PIAVA to discover the original reason for the Pattern.  The original reason was positive, even if it was only self-protection.

When you find what appears to be the original positive reason behind your seemingly self-defeating Pattern, identify the Desires that seem to be sabotaged.  Then PIAVA to find a way that these two movements – the positive reason behind the self-sabotage and the sabotaged Desire – can not only co-exist, but help one another achieve their goals.

Suppose for example we want more money, so we have more free time to pursue our Mission and our Yintegrity.  But we don’t want to spend more hours working for The Man.  That’s because we’re lazy and not seriously committed to our Mission, right?  No way!  We want more time to do what we Want and Need to do, period!  Not what someone else wants us to do!  The World is in rapid Change, which puts Humanity into Protect-the-Status-Quo mode, and the more there is to Protect, the greater the Resistance, so we have to expect few benefactors who have their sights on the Future and beyond. 

Your mind can probably come up with lots of solutions…  Work more now so you’ll have more time later.  Change jobs so you get paid for working on your Mission.  You only need one benefactor, why not go find one on Kickstarter.  Strongarm a stage coach.  Nothing there is breaking any Patterns – the Dualistic mind is not in the business of Breaking Patterns, it can only rearrange the deck chairs.

It will take a PIAVA or several to box our way out of this conundrum.  Maybe we’ll PIAVA to Let Go of negative Beliefs that it’s not possible to get paid well for doing that we Love and what serves our Mission.  You know that most intellectual Manifestation techniques try to exclude the Negative, and for good reason – “No” is not a term that the Unconscious understands.  But Tapping thrives on Negativity.  Tapping acknowledges the Reality of the dysfunction, while stimulating the Meridians necessary to bring the Energy back into Balance.

* * * * *

Bonus – Miracles

For the next several days we’re also blessed with a Quintile Yod focused on Chiron, with North Node-Haumea and the Sun as its feet.  Which makes Haumea another “ruler” of this chart, as it makes five significant Angles with other planets, while Neptune makes only four and Venus three.

The next few days give us an opportunity to make real progress over our Beliefs that getting our Needs met and our Wants satisfied are Impossible.  Remember that we define Unconscious Despair as a Belief that what we Want is not within the realm of Possibility, and we’re scheduled for a clinic from the very planet that facilitates conversion of Despair into Miracles.  The key is to remember Einstein’s assertion that a problem cannot be solved with the same thinking that created the problem. 

The intellect won’t get us there.  PIAVA will, as will Intuition and Insight.  PIAVA is a generator for Intuition, and Yindependence is a generator for Insight.  Yindependence means that you Respect your own Authority over your own Life.  Other people don’t tell you what to do and what not to do, unless their advice aligns with your own path.  When you catch yourself thinking this week, especially if you’re thinking about how to move forward, thank your mind for trying to help, but disregard its input. 

The mind will be a great tool for attending to details and planning-executing ideas that PIAVA and Insight bring to us, but after a PIAVA we need to Change the Subject, so we can be Clear and Open for receiving new material from our PIAVA channel.

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The Chart

080314The Venus T-Square is the dark red triangle, top left.  The Mars-Jupiter-Neptune is the red-green-blue triangle.  The thick gold lines (with a red line connecting them on the left) that make a wedge pointing center right, represent the Mjolnir.  The thinner orange wedge pointing just above center right is the Quintile Yod.

We haven’t drawn the Semi-Square (Eighth Harmonic, or Realignment) between Neptune and South Node-Eris, just because we don’t usually include them.  But it indicates that…

Our Spiritual Epiphanies are likely to help a great deal with our efforts to divine the positive function of our Self-Sabotaging Patterns.  Once we do that we’re free to efficiently negotiate Win-Win between our current Ego and this newly revealed portion of our True Self!