Archive for the ‘Ego Death’ Category

New Project Week II

June 6, 2021

As we move into our New Self (asteroid Klotho Stationary 4:30 am PDT 7 June 2021 in 18 Libra), it will behoove us to Attend to our Relationships with Abuse and with Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus Stationary 9:24 am PDT 14 June in 16 Pisces). Though it’s only one of many Challenges that will Confront our Newbie shortly after our Rebirth, Unconscious and Conscious Changes in our Relationship with Abuse and Privilege is probably the biggest one. The intervening Challenges…

  • Emotional Intensity (Moon moving Out of Bounds for four days starting 10:57 pm PDT 9 June in 18 Gemini). This hits a peak on 11 June (Moon Stationary in North Declination 25:39 and Longitude 11 Cancer at 9:08 pm PDT), and fades on 13 June (Moon moving back In Bounds at 6:19 pm PDT in 4 Leo).
  • Ego Death(s) Required to Let Go of Karma (asteroid Karma moves into Virgo 2:34 pm 9 June). If you have a Journal, Karma was previously in the Sign of Ego Death (Virgo) between 1 December 2020 and 23 January 2021), before it backed back into Leo till 2 April. It’s been moving forward in its third Dance over the last five Duads (2½ Degrees) of Leo since then. This deserves a post of its own.

💥 For now we’ll just say that Virgo is what happens between the Cyclic Culmination of our Individual Identity (Leo) and Meeting Not-Us or Other (Libra). Just as Pisces is about Letting Go of Emotional Baggage so we don’t have to drag it with us into our next Adventure, Virgo is about Letting Go of Obsolete Identities so we don’t mess up our Relationships with Others by “Pretending” (usually Unconsciously) to be someone we ain’t. “Others” includes not just People, but since Everything in the Universe is Conscious, it also includes Everything that we aren’t Being or Owning in the Moment. For example, if you Identify with Loving Nature, prove it to yourself by Inviting a Bird to perch on your finger, without pooping on your hand or giving you Salmonella.

💥 We also need to say that our most troubling Karma is where We Would Rather Die than Feel That Again, aka our “Held Emotions” (South Node). Because most Hupers Believe that we’re Once-Born or Twice-Born, we misinterpret “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That” as “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That,” while it’s really “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That” – Ego Death. We’re just sawing through one of the legs of the three-legged stool we usually sit on. If we Want to minimize Pain, we’d stand up before we did that. But if you know what it means to Go Without an Identity (ie, stepping out of your Identity) for a few minutes, I’d love to know. The Emotion of Confusion is the closest we can come, and we regard Confusion as one of the best Emotions because it’s the Doorway to Evolution. We usually try to suppress it by Figuring Out What’s “Wrong, which is one of our most Self-Destructive Habits.

  • Illuminations about the State of our Planet and the Likelihood of our Survival if we continue on our Current Trajectory (Annular Eclipse of the Sun 3:52 am PDT 10 June in 20 Gemini [Sabian Symbol “A modern cafeteria displays an abundance of food, products of various regions“], primarily impacting the several weeks following it). It will be visible if you happen to be crossing the North Pole (bring a Boat, that’s cold Water). An Annular Eclipse is one where the moon is far enough from the Earth that it doesn’t quite appear to cover the face of the Sun – an Almost-Total Eclipse. Consciousness Grows by Discovery, not by Invention, and under Eclipses we Discover what’s now missing, that we hadn’t noticed previously. For more details, see https://svs.gsfc.nasa.gov/4910.
  • An Increase in Selfishness (Mars enters Leo 6:33 am PDT 11 June). Which is not always a Negative thing. We can’t Love Other Fully until we Love Ourself Fully. Given our Illuminations about the State of the Planet and its Huper inhabitants, though, the Greedheads will probably be making another Power Grab. If we Pray enough for it, they might Betray their Heartlessness and be met with Rotten Tomatoes, or better yet new laws about, say, voting, taxing, and legal theft, and new Cultural Norms about Worshiping Wealth. The few Greedheads who aren’t Sociopaths might even have Epiphanies about their own antisocial Greed. Mars will stay in Leo till the end of July.

While we usually just dwell on the Back-of-Hand/Palm dynamics of Abuse and Privilege, we should actually look at the Pros and Cons of each. For instance, having Privilege can make so many things so much Easier. Rather than Gloating about our supposed Superiority as the source of our Privilege, or arming ourself to the hilt to keep the Rabble from “stealing” back what we’ve stolen from them, or Resisting Privilege because we’re Conscious of the Abuse that results and Guilty about it, we might instead find our Gratitude for our Privilege. In 5D where Collaboration outduels Competition, we’ll no long be in a Zero-Sum World, but back in a Natural World where the Sum is Much Greater than its Parts. From a place of Gratitude for our historical Privilege we may be able to Share it or Teach Others how to Enjoy it without creating more Abuse – not like the Missionaries that enabled the Conquistadors, however. How would we avoid that?

As for Abuse, until enough people Unite against the Psychopaths and Sociopaths and Missionaries (which will require that we no longer Worship Wealth and Greed) and enforce a meaningful Equality, the most positive feature I can envision for Abuse, is for it to Inspire us to Delete our Abuse Karma. History of course was written by the Abusers, who were by and large proud of their Conquists, so the Horrors of our Karmic History may be Exaggerated by their Pride, though I’m not naive enough about the Cruelty and Sadism of our Species, or the extreme Privilege of the Abusers, to Believe that any such Exaggeration has been more than slight.

“Trust but Verify” is good advice. During the 1980s, when Pluto was in Scorpio and Recovery was all the rage, I Learned to Ask, “What color is the wallpaper?” to remind myself that most PTSD episodes are Flashbacks and not Present-Moment. The Jungle “wallpaper” of Vietnam, and the Bare Metal “wallpaper” of the Ships, contrasts with even unadorned wallboard, so we could distinguish hallucinations from real napalm, torture, anal probes, and implants. Grounding is always a helpmate (running an imaginary cable from the base of your spine to the center of the Earth), Eating, and Orgasm are reliable Grounders.

Mirrors are always useful, especially when you’re trying to Heal Feelings that aren’t yours, which is not possible. Mirrors are even useful as a first response – when you’re Feeling awful without obvious Triggers, take the first person who comes to mind, and for five to ten seconds hold a wardrobe Mirror between you and them, facing them. If your Feelings become more acceptable, you know you’re trying to run their Emotions through your Body – or, they’re Manipulating you. If you’re being Manipulated, even with the best Intentions, it’s never fun. Most folks are totally Unconscious that they’re Manipulating. Mirrors are a good strategy for dealing with Climate Deniers, Mask Objectors, Gun Freaks, folks who want to Deny your Vote and Control your Body, and other Antichrist Lovers. You won’t need to get into a hopeless morass of Conversation with them, and if you position your Mirror so it Reflects their Energy back at them, they’ll get a bit of their own toxic “Medicine.”

The Big Advantage of using “Then versus Now” tricks, Grounding, and Mirrors, is that they’re Habit-forming. When we’re Vulnerable to Manipulation by Other People’s Energy, it’s because our Programmers “Intentionally” (though probably Unconsciously) carved a Hole in the back of our Aura, so they could reach in and pull our strings whenever they wanted or needed to. It often looks and feels like Shaming. Habitual Manipulators “see” those Holes, usually Unconsciously, so we can be Manipulated by strangers we pass on the street. Our Programmers just thought it was good parenting, and you may do it yourself when your own kids threaten to drive you Batty. As these “tricks” become a Habit, the hole in our Aura actually Seals Up, so not only do the “tricks” become second-nature, they also Heal the Source of our Dis-Ease. When our Will is Healthily Self-Serving, Habitual Manipulators pass us by without a second glance, because we’re useless as an Object for their Power Games.

Issues such as these may Confront our Experiential Infant this coming week. It never hurts to recall that we’re actually an Eternal Energy Nexus (often called an “Immortal Soul”) borrowing a Material Body. Energy can never be Destroyed, only Transformed. Revelation of Denial (dwarf planet Eris) remains Out of Bounds through all of this (until 4:12 am PDT 18 July in 20 Cancer), so don’t be Surprised if New Information about your Personal or Karmic History or Herstory comes into your Consciousness during these Adventures. If you’ve noticed that almost everything above occurs in 16-20 Degrees of one Sign or another, you’ll be checking your natal chart to see what will be Lit Up for you, as your own Energy System meshes with the Planet’s.

All of this is Important, because as we get past the 14 June Exaggeration of Abuse and Privilege (Nessus Station), we drop into a week of very Intense Manifestation Energy, as three Big Energies are simultaneously Emphasized. When Energies Conjoin in Time, it’s as if they’re Conjoining in Longitude – and these Big Fellas are also actually in neighboring Degrees of their respective Signs. The three Energies are Manifestation Itself (dwarf planet Makemake Stationary 6:42 pm PDT 19 June in 6 Libra), Expansion (Jupiter Stationary 8:04 am PDT 20 June in 3 Pisces, and The Opportunity to Jettison Karma Early (asteroid Lachesis Stationary 2:42 pm PDT 20 June in 6 Scorpio).

If as is the case hereabouts, you’re Wondering why the Foundations of your Personal Infrastructure seems to be Falling Apart, each Failure is a Big Clue about the Unconscious Energies “you” are running but not Owning, that Block what you’re trying to Manifest. Take time to Sit with each Failure of Intention or Function, and Merge with it Energetically. The Objective is to Meet each of your Unconscious Blocks as Energy Clusters in the Unconscious, Meet them in Neutral territory without Bias or Judgment on your part, and with an Open Mind Ask the Question, “Is this Energy really My Own, but I’ve been Denying it?”

Fearbruary IV

February 7, 2021

By now we’re bearing down hard on Fearbruary’s namesake, dwarf planet Sedna, which is about Converting Fear to Power. We’ve been reminding that Fear plus Breathing equals Excitement, Fear plus Tapping equals Grounding and Presence (which is intimidating to would-be antagonists), and Fear plus Kegels equals Power. In addition to a hefty dose of Terror, the Sedna story also contains strong elements of Anger and Competition.

I was into my forties before I realized that Anger was my Habitual Reaction to Fear. Useful when it’s a Fight you can Win, but when Flight or Freeze is Safer, let alone Negotiate, not so much. All Karma is a Powerful Skill, but only when we can Choose to use it when appropriate and not use it when it ain’t. If Karma is a knee-jerk Reaction, it’ll get us in trouble more often than not. We Heal that by getting Conscious about it.

Sedna is at its Strongest (Stationary) as we come up to 1pm PST 8 February, in 28 Taurus. The chart is pretty benign…

The basic Configuration is a “Square Fez with a Chinstrap” – a red-sided trapezoid with a fifth planet at the midpoint of the base. The Chinstrap – dwarf planet Ceres (Sustainability and Sustenance), is where the Power emerges. The two naked Squares (red lines) are where potential Challenges will be spawned – Sedna (Fear) to asteroid Karma (Karma) or Fear about Letting Go of What We Know Best (our Karma), and Pluto (TranceFormation) to dwarf planet Haumea (Rebirth) or Failing to Discern the Difference between Physical Death from Ego Death.

If we could train ourself to instantly Discern an Ego Death from a Threat of Physical Death, and Realize that Resistance is Futile when it comes to Letting Go of the Known (it’s inevitable, and it’ll probably be harder later), our Lives would be so much more Sustainable (the chinstrap), wouldn’t they. So we could Pray for Physical Safety, Pretend we’re Acting in a Play, Enjoy the Drama from the Perspective of the audience, and make the most out of these Opportunities to Practice these two Cosmic Skills (Ego Death and Letting Go of Karma). Letting Go of Karma usually requires an Ego Death anyway, so this is really an Amazing Opportunity.

Note: If you use a Theta Prayer, you can check to see if your prayer will work, modify it and check again, iterating as many times as necessary, till you find just the right Prayer to give you in-the-Gut Confidence in your Safety.

But a Square Fez offers an Alternative to its Challenges, namely its Diagonals (the green lines, which are “Quincunxes,” or 5 Signs long). Notice that each Square is simultaneously in two Tricolors (a triangle made up of a red Square, a green Quincunx, and either a Trine or a Sextile – a long or short blue line). A Tricolor allows one to Liberate the Grace in the blue lines by Embracing the Permanent Curiosity in the green line, which can Resolve the Challenge in the red line.

By Permanent Curiosity we mean Avoiding Trying to Figure It Out – Recognizing that Confusion is one of our most Valuable Emotions and not an invitation to “Left-Brain” Research and Analysis. If we can stay Present with the Confusion Emotion and Learn to Celebrate it, it will lead us to much more Powerful places. Someone once said (Einstein? Maybe) that “We can’t Solve a Problem using the same Thinking that postulated the Problem.” Confusion, if you can Embrace it as the Emotion that it is, will open your Intuition to a kind of Thinking that will Solve the Problem, or more likely, Perspectives that will Reframe the Problem into Opportunities.

A Quincunx is a miniature Mystery School, like a Zen Koan or a piece of a Yin Gate, a Portal to the next step in our Evolution. When you try to contemplate the sound of one hand clapping, for instance, if you take the effort seriously, you’ll be Expanding and Reframing your notions of Sound, of Hands, of Honoring, of Action, and who knows what else, and you might even discover why Beatniks used to “clap” by snapping their fingers.

The Major Tricolors (Square-Quincunx-Trine), like…

Pluto-Square-Haumea-Quincunx-Sedna-Trine-Pluto or TranceFormation Challenging Rebirth which is Curious about Fear and Power and how it might make TranceFormation Effortless,

and Sedna-Square-Karma-Quincunx-Pluto-Trine-Sedna,

…lead to Dumb-Luck Blessings that are typical of Trines. The Minor Tricolors (Square-Quincunx-Sextile), like…

Haumea-Square-Pluto-Quincunx-Karma-Sextile-Haumea or Rebirth making TranceFormation difficult while TranceFormation is in Awe of Inertia, and if we Step into it we can sort of see how Inertia facilitates Rebirth,

and Karma-Square-Sedna-Quincunx-Haumea-Sextile-Karma,

…lead to greater Engagement and probably more Wisdom, as a Sextile doesn’t unlock its Grace till we take the First Step, Participating instead of just Observing. Notice that we’re just following different paths around the lines inside the twelve-sided circle. Each path offers a different Curriculum for us, and if we have the time, we could maximize this Opportunity by following them all. Eventually we’ll end up at Ceres, the chinstrap, and make our Life more Sustainable. We’d just be adding -Sextile-Ceres to the end of each Major Tricolor, and -Quincunx-Ceres to the end of each Minor Tricolor.

So the keys to the Tricolors are Haumea-Quincunx-Sedna, Karma-Quincunx-Pluto, Pluto-Quincunx-Karma, and Sedna-Quincunx-Haumea. And then, if we Chose the more Rewarding but more Effortful Minor Tricolors, we’ll have to add Haumea-Quincunx-Ceres and Karma-Quincunx-Ceres in order to “Cross Go” and Earn our Sustainability Merit Badge (if you haven’t Learned to Fully and Lovingly Embrace All of your Emotions yet, you may not Realize that Earth is just a Very Deep board game). Let’s take an example, say, Haumea-Quincunx-Sedna.

So we have a Koan about the Relationship between Rebirth and Fear/Power. (It might help to remember what Artemisia said about Power in The Findhorn Garden.) Certainly we Fear Rebirth. Our Ego is probably very Attached to our Toys and Colleagues in the Current Incarnation, and loathe to give them up. Those are Intellectualizations, and the Intellect doesn’t have the Power to Evolve us, because it’s basically a Logic machine. Give it some rules and some starting conditions, and it can dummy up a pretty fair simulation. But where is the Evolution in that? We’re just rearranging the deckchairs in our Existing Concept Set.

How might there be Power in Rebirth? How might it Feel to be Conscious of all of our Parallel Lives? Now we’re starting to get into some Koan-like Questions, which may Open us to new Intuitions that Expand our Concept Set. “How might it Feel…” is particularly Open-Ended. If you don’t just find the list of Emotions in the back of your Alexanders book and highlight a few, but Open your Emotional Body to the actual Experience, what might happen? You probably Relive some part of your Past every day. Can you be there in the Cafeteria Line, and also Be Here Now? It might be more inviting to Remember what it was like to Make Love with your All-Time Favorite Lover and also Be Here Now.

Does that feel like fuses blowing in your head? That might be a good sign. One – just One – part of what’s involved with actual Permanent Curiosity (aka Awe or Wonder, but not Wondering about, Wondering at instead), is that we have to Conceive of more Dimensions than we’re used to working with, and different Rules. Since the Universe is Both/And, what is a Contradiction to the Intellect is a Paradox to our Curiosity. Do we even know what a Paradox is, or is it just something unexplainable? It should be something that defies our Concepts of Reality, something that forces us to Choose between what we See and what we Know, or somehow Embrace them both.

A number of the folks in the Antichrist’s Cult may be doing that now, Knowing that just a month ago they were Legends in their Own Minds, but Seeing that now they’re Criminals. Many may Choose to be Martyrs, where both Stories can seem to be True, rather than Expanding their Concept Set to include the possibility that not everyone appreciates White Supremacy, or Expanding their Concept Set to include the possibility that Other People may actually have a right to Exist. But again, these are Intellectualizations. We can’t Predict how any given person will Expand their Consciousness if and when they do, because they’re an Organism much more Complex and Multidimensional than our Observing Mind.

The point is that we may be going through a similar process, where some of what we See and what we Know are splitting apart. If we find ourself trying to figure out how to put Humpty-Dumpty back together again, we may want to Change the Program, and begin to Appreciate Curiosity as the Blessing that it is, as it is, without having to Dissect it. You might also find yourself in a place where you’re being Reborn and your Trances Reformed and your Karma is backing off, you Feel Empowered and Delighted by the process, and it Feels Sustainable. More Power to you!

Warmup for the Digital Age 2

December 20, 2020

Sheila asks, “So does the Age of Aquarius start Monday?”

The answer is, “Kinda sorta.” The Digital Age lasts about 2 Centuries, while the Age of Aquarius spans more than 21 Centuries. It’s a lot harder to pinpoint a Threshold for a 21-Century Cycle than a 2-Century one. We’re using the term “Digital Age” to apply to a time period very specifically bounded by astrology, and we’re labeling it based on Huper History and Herstory.

The Age of Aquarius is astronomically bounded. We know how long the Ages are (given certain assumptions), but if we have a firm date for when the current 25,920-year Great Year began, I don’t know what it is. I know there’s a lot of disagreement and many estimates, which vary by Millennia. It’s okay with me if you consider the Aquarian Age to begin on Monday. We could also choose the beginning of the 21st Century, or the first performance of Hair.

If I was going to research a firm date on an unlimited budget, I’d have AI review all of the World’s news media for the last many years, and score all news reports on whether they emphasized Intellectual Issues (Aquarius) more than they emphasized Emotional Issues (Pisces), examine the results by daily average to see if they described a smooth curve, and if so choose the year when Intellectual Issues first dominated. If they didn’t describe a smooth curve, I’d look for modes (clusters of similar data), and if none emerged, I’d say it was N/A.

Aquarius is Fixed Air, so it’s not just more Intellectual, it’s also more Opinionated. The 1/1/2000 chart foresaged Polarization, which has been the case in spades, as folks Confuse their Immutable Truth of the Heart (asteroid Aletheia) with their Debatable Truth of the Head (asteroid Veritas) and get sucked into Life-or-Death Ego-Association with Ideas, forgetting that everyone’s Truth of the Heart is Unique, and everyone is a Front for an Immortal Soul, so Killing them will only prolong the Agony of Ego-Association. Pity that the greatest Joy some Hupers seem to savor is Self-Righteousness.

However, these Polarized Opinions are all heavily Emotionalized, so I’d have to suppose that we’re still in a Transition period of indeterminate length. If the Digital Age produces a Lie Detector that gives binary answers that everyone Trusts, then, Perish the Thought, we might be able to definitively declare Aquarius to have arrived, though we’d have to rename it the Age of ‘Bots. We may have to anyway, if Ray Kurzweil has it right.

While we refer to it as Truth of the Head, our Intellectual Truths are really Truth of the Solar Plexus, because that’s where Thought is actually Centered. Small wonder that Thought is Confused with Anger, Judgment, and Hatred. Blame Descartes and Newton and everyone else who Believes that Thought can be dissected out of the Whole and become anything except a small bloody chunk of a Corpse, or a dead Butterfly impaled on a pin. You won’t be far off to envision an Argument as two people plucking out their giblets and throwing them at each other.

Sign Changes

Last time we mentioned that a number of planets Change Signs as the ~Aquarian Digital Age begins…

Asteroid Lachesis is named after the Greek Goddess of Fate whose job it was to Measure the Length of your Karmic TimeLines. Each Karmic Habit you brought into your current Lifetime came with an Expiry Date. Well, we know that Karma is Dead, so how does that work? If we’re Unconscious of a Karmic Pattern, it defaults to our Fate.

Once we become Conscious that we’re Repeating an Obsolete Habit that doesn’t really serve us in our current Lifetime, then we can Choose an Alternative rather than continuing to “beat that Dead Horse” all over again. Since we’re Addicted to our Karma because it’s What We Know and what we’re Comfortable with, we’d have some Inertia to overcome, but again, with Awareness and Motivation we can do that.

So we give ourselves the Benefit of Consciousness and interpret Lachesis as Consciously Choosing to Shift our TimeLines, where a TimeLine is anything that unfolds in Time – a Habit, a Job, a Relationship, a Trip, a Nap, a Residence, or a Jail Term. Lachesis is a kind of Get Out of Jail Free card, if you’ve ever played Monopoly.

Asteroid Atropos is the Goddess who actually Cuts the Lachesian Chords. So Atropos is about TimeLines that end on their own, without our Conscious intervention. Maybe. Karma is addictive, so we can sleep through an Atroposian alarm. We’d probably eventually wonder why in the devil we did that and Choose to shift the Momentum.

On 15 December 2020 (2:40 pm PST), Lachesis moved from Libra (Meeting Other) to Scorpio (Getting to the Bottom of Things). It was in Libra for only three months, but it’ll stay in Scorpio for almost a year, as it does Remediation (Retrogradation) next Spring. So you’ve been Inconvenienced in your Relationships with Others for the last several months.

You’ve probably been Blaming it on the Custardovirus, or on dastardly abrogations of your precious FREEDOM to not have to wear a Mask, but in Scorpio you’ll be searching everywhere for what it was that got you so upset, especially if you inadvertently kill somebody with your callousness. We hide our True Feelings every day, yet we object to wearing a physical Mask? Maybe it’s because a Mask inhibits our Ability to Manipulate others with disingenuous facial Expressions. No Accusation, just a Speculation or even a Projection – what’s True for you is for you to Discover through your Scorpionic Deep Dives next year.

Asteroid Juno (Growth in Consciousness) left Scorpio for Sagittarius on 18 December (9:20 am PST), which should make our Lessons Feel a lot Easier. Juno’s timetable is similar to that of Lachesis – it was in its prior Sign (Scorpio) for only about three months, but it stays in its new Sign (Sagittarius) for most of 2021, with Remedial work (Retrogradation) during the summer.

I’d guess we’ve been clawing at our scabs for the last several months while Juno was in Scorpio, to try to Expose as many Limiting Beliefs as we could find, so we could carry less Baggage into a Digital Age where who knows how much of Life might become Virtual. Much of our Life is already Lived through Fantasy anyway. Sagittarius is Mutable (Changeable, as in Mutation) Fire (Spirit), so it’s the Sign where we Let Go of what we no longer need for protecting our Material Ego from Scarcity.

And of course Saturn (The Most Important Thing) on 16 December at 9am PST, and Jupiter (Expansion) on 19 December at 5am PST, waved adieu to Pragmatic Just-Fix-It Capricorn and moved into Idealistic NoNotThatWay-ThisIsHowToFixIt Aquarius. It’s Catty of me I know, but I imagine Aquarians sitting in a bar arguing about how to Fix Society. We have the poster child for Fixed Air (Rigid Ideology) in the US Congress.

To be Honest, we have to wonder what planets have been in Aquarius for the last while already, as Congress has been unable to Negotiate with itself at least since the Tea Party came ashore, if not since Newt crawled out from under his rock. Asteroid Aletheia (The Heart’s Truth) has been in Aquarius since April 2020, which makes sense relative to the closure of the Federal purse since the March CARIES Act. Asteroid Pallas (Boundaries) has been in Aquarius since Indigenous Peoples’ Day, 7 December, and will be till April 2021.

But actually, if Hupers Learn to differentiate their Heart-Truth from their SolarPlexus-Truth and find the nanobit of Awareness and Empathy necessary to look in the Mirror and see how Upset they get when someone else Forces foreign Beliefs on them, and then Realize how Odious it must be for them to Force their Beliefs on Others (Duh!), they might Loosen Up a bit. Pour me another before closing time, ok? – an Aquarian anal-ysis if there ever was one. Aquarius is completely capable of figuring this out, it’s just my cynicism about Huperity that Limits my Optimism.

I get it, that’s my Karmic Pattern that, if I don’t look in the Mirror, will lock me into a Future of Competition to the Death. I’ll have to turn it around, so I can Manifest a Future of Peace and Collaboration and let the rest of the Hupers Manifest whatever they want in their own back yards. You know the First Law of Manifestation, Whosoever Farts in Church, sits in their own Pew. Or is that the Law of Karma. Can’t be, that one’s been Repealed.

Saturn averages two and a half years in each Sign, and Jupiter one year. Saturn in Aquarius should Teach us that The Most Important Thing is to Avoid Taking our Metaphors Literally. That’s the definition of Fundamentalism, and it applies to just about everybody, including us if we don’t constantly Let Go of our Natural tendency to want to have Burnt Umber clearly differentiated from Beige (Black and White are no longer PC).

What’s difficult to remember is that It’s All Metaphor. Even with our Best Multidimensional Intuition and our Most Outrageous Channelings, we Perceive such a tiny sliver of Reality, that while our Heart’s Truth defines Our Own Values, it doesn’t have anything to say about the Nature of Reality. Our Solar Plexus-Truth is even less descriptive, even though it’s Useful for helping us find Food and Shelter.

Saturn’s last sojourn in Aquarius was 1990-1993. Remember Daddy-Bush’s First Gulf War? Collapse of the USSR? The End of Apartheid? The first breath of the World Wide Web?

Jupiter in Aquarius can lead us to Tolerate, and even Embrace, Cognitive Dissonance, the Practice of being able to hold Contradictory Beliefs in mind, as equally Valid, at the same time. Huper Mind Perceives Duality, Either/Or, while Reality is Unitary and Multifarious, or Both/And. If we Allow our Thinking to Define our Concepts about Reality, we’ll never escape Judgment, and Love Dissolves when Judgment Replaces Curiosity.

We don’t get to 5D without Unconditional Self-Love, so Embracing Cognitive Dissonance is a Critical Skill. Every Perspective contains valuable information (even Mask Denial), so we can’t afford to Reject any of them, even though we probably want to rank them in order of their Utility.

Jupiter last visited Aquarius in 2008-2009. Hard to believe that was a dozen years ago. We had the H1N1 Swine Flu. Obama took over to sweep up the shards of the US Economy after the Derivative Crisis, often misnamed the Housing Crisis. Sully landed in the Hudson. And Bitcoin took its first breath.

Easy to forget in Light of the Jupiter-Saturn “Christmas Star,” but of course the Sun moves out of Sagittarius and into Capricorn at 2:05 am PST on 21 December. Our Perception of our own Essence should become less Scattered and more Pragmatic. That’ll be welcome.

Dwarf planet Ixion (Forbidden or Hidden Unique Genius) sticks its toe back into Capricorn on 27 December (1:20 am PST), for the second of three times as it stutters it’s way out of Sagittarius. It enters Capricorn “for good” (till next time, 250 years hence) in November 2021. We’ve hopefully used its 15-year passage through Sagittarius to Let Go Of our Inhibitions on Allowing it to Exist and Bloom, so we can use its 19-year trip through Capricorn Putting It To Work Healing the Planet, or at least building a very large Ark.

Cusps are tricky. Planets that are four Signs apart (Trine, Dumb-Luck Grace) get on well with one another because they share the same element – Water to Water and Fire to Fire. Planets that are three Signs apart (Square, Challenge) create Stress because they don’t share the same element – Air to Earth or Water to Fire. But look at these Cuspy Angles in the Saturn-Jupiter Initiation chart above…

Sedna to Karma is three Signs (with a little slop) so it should be Difficult, yet it’s Earth to Earth (Taurus to Virgo), which should make it Easier.

Moon to Juno is four Signs so it should be Easy, yet it’s Water to Fire (Pisces to Sagittarius), which should be more Difficult.

Some of each, perhaps? Both/And? An Opportunity to Practice our Cognitive Dissonance? Maybe a completely new kind of Relationship, neither Easy nor Difficult, but Orthogonal to that Dimension? A Paradox?

Ego Death and Insomnia

December 5, 2020

A reader writes…

Your posts have been immensely helpful with this transition. Really lining up with what I’m experiencing. Curious about why insomnia happens with big ego death. Is there any literature or understanding you can point me to understand it better? It has passed since I’ve allowed myself to feel, move, integrate, draw, accept, forgive, and do a composting ceremony, but I still had to use rhodiola and GABA to help my nervous system not go bonkers into oblivion.

My first thought when reading this was Yintegrity. Yangtegrity is when we Do what we said we were going to Do, and Do it when we said we were going to Do it. Yintegrity is when we Do what we feel like Doing, moment to moment. Living Yintegrity in a Yangtegrity World, however, requires that we minimize our Commitments, Renegotiate when we’re able to, and Make Amends when Renegotiation isn’t possible and the Relationship is worth Keeping, Yintegrity is associated with Uranus, as Living in Yintegrity is the Soul’s Preference because being more Multidimensional than Yangtegrity, it’s more likely to put us where we Need to be when we Need to be there, to move toward our Goals and our Life Mission.

And, Uranus is all about Sleep Disruption. When Uranus is Lit Up, we need to Sleep when we’re tired, and Create when we aren’t. Uranus don’t much cotton to Clocks and Calenders and Yangtegrities. But it’s not Uranus that’s Lit Up, it’s Neptune. So what gives? What’s the Angle between them in the Sky now? Well, Uranus is in a Waxing Septile (49 Degrees ahead, Seventh Harmonic, about Timing – what a Coincidence!) to Neptune.

The Cycle began on 2 February 1993. a day I remember well. As is often the case with Uranus, there was a huge Windstorm, and it blew over an ancient 200-foot Walnut tree near where I was Living. The Cycle is about “A hidden choir sings during a religious service.” It’s a 157-year Cycle, so it’s still warming up.

How does the Uranus-Neptune Septile map out? Like so…

(Pretend those lines are Lavender, not Grey.)

We had to add a Star or two and get a bit Erotic, but a very reasonable Grand Septile emerges. The Septile family of Angles are about Timing – putting us where we Need to be when we Need to be there. Doesn’t matter what we’re Doing, Timing is critical, and sometimes referred to, appropriately, as “Everything.” I hadn’t connected the two words before for some reason, but the Synchronicity that Dr. Dispenza talked about in his video, is exactly that, Timing!

We don’t have any problem adding Betelgeuse, it’s a major Star and means Joy and Success (in spite of the movie). The Star Pherkad is more of a stretch, but as the Little Bear’s right paw, it’s one of the Guardians of the North Pole, and used by Navigators to tell the Time at night. It’s known as a Jovial, Expressive, Creative Crown Prince. Minor planet (TNO) Praamzius is also a stretch, but the Mythic Praamzius was The Lithuanian God of Time, and the chief God of the Lithuanian Pantheon. The Lithuanians once ran an Empire stretching across the Breadbasket of Europe from the Baltic Sea to the Black Sea. We haven’t included asteroid Eros before, but who would ever want to exclude Eros except some tightass Religionist who’s trying to cover their own perversity by Shaming others. Sappho/Self-Love and Pluto/Trance round out our Septemvirate.

Notice that Neptune is also making a Waxxing Septile to Pluto. That Cycle began 2 August 1891 in 9 Gemini, “A quiver full of arrows.” Cupid’s, undoubtedly. We’re familiar with the “Ouija board” Uranus-Pluto Cycle from it’s Waxing Square in 2012. A lot of folks were skeptical that 2012 signified The End of the World as We Knew It. Little did they know that they were just Impatient – the Earth moves on a Geological time scale. Eight years is a twitch of an eyelash. Uranus is Biseptile to Pluto, combining the Seventh and Second Harmonics – Timing with Rules! PIAVA is sort of a set of Guidelines for Timing Magnetic Manifestation – Rules in a sense, and so is Dr. Joe’s Work.

Is Uranus involved in our Correspondent’s nativity? Well, the current Neptune Station is very closely and auspiciously placed relative to their Mission in the Lifetime (North Node), which in turn closely Relates to their own natal Neptune, which in turn close Relates to their own natal Uranus. The Suggestion is that this is a Gift that they would greatly Enjoy if they stopped Resisting it. Psychologist Gay Hendricks talks about Upper Limits – having Too Much Fun, or Too Much Good Fortune, so we have to Manifest something, usually Unconsciously, to bring us back into the range of Emotions we’re Comfortable with.

Big Ego Deaths are associated with the South Node (Held Emotions) more than the North Node. That Religionist we mentioned is a good example – they try to Hold their Erotic Emotions back by tightening their Sphincter. Held Emotions are Emotions that we’d rather Die than Feel, and they Hide Skills we need in order to Achieve our Mission in the current Lifetime, Skills which we developed to a high Degree in other Lifetimes, but which eventually became associated with some serious Trauma (like William Tell sneezing and missing the Apple on the low side), leading to a Never Again Vow that must be Reverted in the present Lifetime.

So I suspect that our Correspondent has recently Broken Through an immense wad of Karma, and the Vast Void of Limitless Potential that follows such a Feat, is Frightening. Not sure what Gay recommends today (I’ll be reading his The Big Leap next week), but R&R is what he once Suggested as a remedy for Upper Limits, and being very gentle with our New Self, treating ourself like the Newborn that we are. Our Held Emotions are usually Held just outside of our Consciousness for Self-Protection, so it’s common for us to be Unaware of them. We can often get a hint about them from our favorite Criticisms of Others.

Let me back up a step and talk a bit about Ego Death, as I’m not sure the average person on the street would know what the term means, and might be intimidated by the second half of the phrase, if not insulted by the first half – Ego in popular language usually means either Narcissism or Selfishness. We use it in a quasi-psychological sense, as our Identity or Sense of Self. The verb “am” signifies Identity. I Work because I am an Employee or Entrepreneur. I Eat because I am Hungry. I Sleep because I am Tired. Or because I am Enslaved by Clocks. I Write because I am Inspired to Share.

By the end of a week I am a lot of different Word Pictures. Our Ego is Complex and Constantly Changing, yet it carries a Consistent Flavor. Our Friends and Associates will easily Identify what we do or say that’s “Out of Character” or not, based on their familiarity with Who I am in their Experience. Our Ego is quite Vague, but at the same time Curiously Distinct. In any given moment, whatever I am not in that moment is The Unconscious. Whatever I am never is my Karma. Those are very simplified definitions, as “Reality” is much more Complex, but they’re the Core of it.

Hupers are Thinkers and Communicators, which Chains them to Words. Words are Symbols, but too easily Confused with their Referents – with what they Symbolize. If someone calls me an Asshole, that’s just silly, because I know that I am a lot more than my Anus. If I Respond to that moniker with Anger, which would not be unusual, that’s a whole ‘nother story, and an example of Confusing the Map with the Territory. Confusion though, is Good; it’s the first stage of Growth in Consciousness – as long as we Recognize it and Eschew Anal-ysis.

That never business we mentioned as our Karma is important, because we line the Cage that it represents with Words, and we Understand that venturing beyond the walls of our Cage is Dangerous. We Feel the Danger in our Guts. When we’re Forced to, or Decide to, step out of our Karmic Cage, we have to Confront our Physiological Reactions to that Danger. We have some Tools for that – Fear plus Breathing equals Excitement, Fear plus Kegels can equal Power (if we do enough of them), Fear plus Reframing can equal many things. We’ve talked several times about alternating Thetas and Tapping to distinguish Flushbacks from Intuitions. Being Aware of the Fear – rather than the alleged Danger – is a critical first step.

I just finished reading Annie Hopper’s Wired for Healing: Rewiring the Brain to Recover from Chronic and Mysterious Illnesses – any of the Alphabet Soups that the Medical Cartel is finally beginning to Recognize but has no idea what to do with except to ring their cash register. The book is an introduction to Annie’s techniques for using neuroplasticity to rewire the Limbric Brain so we Recognize false positives in the Fight/Flight/Freeze department, and Reframe them. Injuries of various kinds – including environmental toxicity and Trauma, can create miswirings there that give us little respite from the Ghosts of the Lions and Tigers that we used to be in Competition with.

Annie’s miswirings started from a “minor” traffic accident, and accelerated into debilitating after she moved her counseling office into a toxic moldy building. I haven’t done any of her formal rewiring exercises (they aren’t in the book, they’re on her DVDs), but I’ve been playing with the idea that some of my Anxieties may be false positives. I believe because of this, and because of watching Joe Dispenza’s video a few days ago (I know Joe is a Powerful Healer who would give me “my money’s worth” for my $50, and his video covered the same ground in a very different way), I had a very unusual Experience yesterday.

I had an errand in another town an hour’s drive away, and it was a bright sunny day. As the road turned southbound with the sun in my eyes I noticed how difficult it was to see into the parts of the road that were shaded by trees. I squinted into the road a ways in front of me, and, talking to myself silently, I decided that I could see well enough to tell that there were no bicycles or other obstacles lurking there.

I was very surprised when someone answered me! The Voice was from the back of my head, but in my spontaneous imagination it was in a Body, as if it was in the back seat. It said, “Well, it’s Clear now, but it may not be by the time you get there.” Neither the Voice nor the Body were any person I knew, but the Body was like a cartoon character that was familiar, though I couldn’t place it. Maybe reminiscent of Humpty Dumpty. I Realized that the Voice was mine and was always there, but for some reason in this moment, it was distinctly Separate from me. “My own” Consciousness was Dual – part still focused on the road, and the other part in the back “seat” talking to this Entity.

There was no animosity between us, more like camaraderie. I asked him if he was able and willing to fly on ahead and tell me if the road was clear so I could relax and focus on the immediate future, and he was delighted to be of Service – Service has obviously always been his Intent, but too often Conscious-I Felt him as a mild paranoia. When another car or truck in front of me obscured the road ahead, I was able to ask him if it was clear in front of them. I was able to ask him if traffic lights up ahead were going to turn yellow before I got to them. Judged by my Belly, his answers were trustworthy. His Separate Existence is no longer so clear, but I’m still able to ask him to extend my Second Sight.

Today as I’m reading, I see that Dr. Joe has turned the concept of Ego Death inside out. We can call it Thaed Oge – sounds Irish, don’t it. From Dr. Dispenza’s Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself (p.22)…

Our routine, known thoughts and feelings perpetuate the same state of being, which creates the same behaviors, and creates the same reality. So if we want to change some aspect of our reality, we have to think, feel, and act in new ways; we have to ‘be’ different in terms of our responses to experiences. We have to ‘become’ someone else. We have to create a new state of mind … we need to observe a new outcome with that new mind.

From a quantum standpoint, we have to create a different state of being as an observer and generate a new electromagnetic signature When we do, we will match a potential reality in the field that exists only as an electromagnetic potential. Once that match exists between who are being/what we are broadcasting and the electromagnetic potential in the field, we will be pulled toward that potential reality, or it will find us.”

If you want a new outcome, you will have to break the habit of being yourself, and reinvent a new self.”

As Gary Craig does with his Unseen Therapist, Joe points out that to Manifest a new Reality we need to both, at the same time, Focus our Intention, and Raise our Vibration by generating Feelings of Love or Gratitude or Joy, perhaps by recalling positive Experiences. Experiments have shown that neither, by itself, is sufficient, and both are necessary.

Abuse Flushbacks IV

November 27, 2020

As we said in the previous post, “We aren’t done with our Abuse Flushbacks yet, as the 30 November 2020 Full Moon (1:30 am PST, in 9 Gemini) is Challenged (T-Squared) by Abuse and Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus).”

What we didn’t mention is that it’s a Self-Resolving Challenge (a Diamond Star, indicated by the green wedge or Finger of the Goddess that creates the “Bowl of Grace” blue lines below the T-Square’s red triangle)…

Our Allies in the Self-Resolution are What we Choose to Manifest (dwarf planet Makemake) and the Gift of Eliminating Habits that Impede our Vitality (asteroid Atropos Stationary 27 November 12:50 pm PST in 8 Leo, Conjunct dwarf planet Varuna) – these are the two folks on the base of the green wedge.

Eliminating Habits that Impede our Vitality (Atropos-Varuna) is the Focus of a second potential difficulty in the Full Moon chart, as it Challenges (T-Squares) the Dance (Opposition) between Our Soul’s Demand for Self-Sovereignty (Uranus Conjunct Lilith) and Our Ability to Recast Ego Death in a Loving Light (minor planet Zhulong [the Red Dragon of Enlightenment] Conjunct Venus [Heart] and asteroid Nemesis [Ego Death])…

But this Challenge is more complicated than that, as the Dance between Our Soul’s Demand for Self-Sovereignty and Our Ability to Reframe Ego Death in a Loving Light is actually a Mystery School (the central Opposition in a Yin Gate, indicated by the two green Xs surrounding it). A Mystery School aims to Teach us that this Dance is a Paradox, a Relationship that Operates above and beyond the realm of Cause and Effect. That means we have to Learn to rely on a methodology that’s more multidimensional than the 2D Mind, such as our Intuition and Guidance, and our Heart’s Truth. Rote Learning won’t work, as that’s also 2D by nature.

What might Our Soul’s Demand for Self-Sovereignty look like in “Real” Life? You may have a sense that Your Time is not Your Own – you have Obligations that aren’t Unconditionally Loving, or People in your Life who have Expectations that you have to Compromise yourself to Fulfill. You have those Obligations for a reason (for instance, they may provide you with shelter and food!), and for any number of reasons you may not want to Confront your People’s Expectations, or it may just not be Practical to do so (for instance, their Expectations may be Unconscious, and if you brought the subject up they’d just say it was your fault – or one of their Expectations might be that you’ll never Confront them!).

This is the Lilith-Uranus Conjunction, which we’ll actually be dealing with for another several weeks, so this is a good Opportunity to start working with it. Yintegrity is an important part of the Descent of Soul (Uranus in Taurus) and of 5D, and this Opportunity might help us Finesse the Transition, rather than having to make a Sudden Break.

As for Our Ability to Reframe Ego Death in a Loving Light (Zhulong-Venus-Nemesis), we may have Sovereignty issues like the above, or any number of other issues with Others, where we need to make Changes to our Boundaries, but we don’t know how, and our mind frequently Helicopters around the Arguments – “You need to Change that” – “No, I can’t Change it” – “Yes, you need to Change it,” around and around ad infintum. You don’t Believe you can Change it because it seems like it would take a huge Ego Death to do so, and we see Ego Death as something We’d rather Die than do.

What if it wasn’t? What if Ego Death became as routine as commuting to or from Work – after all, every time we do that we Transition from one Identity to another. Or Falling Asleep – now that’s a Big Ego Death, and may have a lot to do with our Insomnia! If you Love your Work and you Love your Home Life, and they’re In Balance, then you’d be swapping Identities twice every Workday, and you’d be Loving every minute of it. Like your Puppy with a tennis ball – Oh Boy Oh Boy, we get to go to Work now! Oh Boy, Oh Boy, we get to go Home now! Wag, Wag. Focus on the Yintegrity of the New Self waiting for you on the other side of your Molt, and you may be Able to easily Reframe Ego Death in a Loving Light.

As this is a Mystery School, you don’t want to try to Decide anything or Pin anything Down. You want to just Ponder, with Curiosity. “I Wonder what would happen if [this or that Miracle occurred].” The Challenge is to Heal whatever these Unresolved Issues might be doing to your Health and Vitality. If we Need to but Can’t, that can have a nasty impact on our Stress Level and the Hormones that are supposed to keep everything in our Body Running Smoothly. It can also easily create Lackawanna, which can have all manner of Negative Consequences.

The Bottom Line is that we Don’t Want to try to Solve these Issues. We Want to Get Clear on What We Want from them, and then Get to Work Imagining it Happening. A Mystery School should get us out of Male Doing Mind and into Female Magnetizing Mind. Once you’re Clear about What You Want and Imagining How You’ll Feel when you’ve Manifested it, you won’t have to Do anything – it’ll take care of itself. Even if you have to Do it, it’ll Feel more like Fun than Work, because the Positive Outcome will be in your Mind.

Abuse Flushbacks III

November 26, 2020

Alas, we aren’t done with our Abuse Flushbacks yet, as the 30 November 2020 Full Moon (1:30 am PST, in 9 Gemini) is Challenged (T-Squared) by Abuse and Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus). The Full Moon also includes a second significant Challenge. While not done pouting, and probably not done seeking revenge, at least the Antichrist has allowed the Future to proceed. Interesting coincidence that he did it the day after his favorite planet, Nessus, finished being Exaggerated (Stationary).

We have a couple of Thresholds today (Sign Changes, on 25 November). The asteroid of Trust (Eurydike), having dipped his toe into Majesty (Leo) for two weeks, discovered that the World was not ready to Embrace Respect (Leo) yet, and at 8am PST hightailed it back into Compassion (Cancer). He’ll try again in early June to see if we’re able by then to have Confidence (Leo) in our Trust for one another. I hope everybody remembers that if one party plays Win-Win and the other plays Win-Lose, the Win-Lose party Wins.

And at around 1pm PST, the asteroid of Self-Love (Sappho) finished her Investigation of Hidden Impediments (Scorpio) to Unconditional Self-Love, and moved into the space where she can Shake them Off (Sagittarius), Tenderize the scar tissue, and fully Embrace herself. This period only lasts till the end of January, but then she Gets to Work in Earnest (Capricorn) on the many new projects that her newfound Wholeness permits, before she does a Deep Review of the Social Contract (Retrograde in Aquarius) starting in April and taking up most of the rest of 2021.

Meanwhile, back to the future, as we’re already Deep in the Arms of Material Confusion and Spiritual Clarity (Neptune Stationary 28 November 4:30 pm PST in 19 Pisces). The most important thing to Remember while Neptune is Acting Out, is that Confusion is the first Stage of Growth. Confusion means that the intellectual justifications for our Limiting Beliefs are Breaking Down, and these Beliefs are like a Birdcage that keeps us Locked In, but also provide Comfort because it’s Familiar. It’s Scary when the bars in the Cage loosen, as if Granny gave Sylvester the keys to Tweety’s Cage, and we’re Tweety. If it’s too Scary, try Kegels. Or just Breathe – Fear plus Breathing = Excitement.

Simultaneous with the Neptune Station we’re Blessed with an Exaggeration of our Ability to Reject Obsolete Habits (Station of asteroid Atropos 27 November 12:50 pm PST in 8 Leo), especially with regard to Health and Vitality (Conjunct dwarf planet Varuna). The Atropos Station occurs two and a half days and one and a half Degrees before the Full Moon, and Atropos-Varuna is the Focus of the second Challenge in the Full Moon chart. We’ll describe the details of that Challenge later.

Be Mindful that Rejecting Obsolete Health and Vitality Habits often coincides with “Healing Crises,” when symptoms worsen. Many of us got special treatment when we were sick as children, and we Learned that getting sick was a way to get an extra vacation, even if we had to tolerate the symptoms of it. Though the “modern” Scienterrific and Capitalist view is that Illness is a Biochemical process, Biochemistry is really a Perspective, not an Objective Absolute.

Illness is actually a Trance, and with enough Power and Skill it’s possible to Take Off an Illness the way we Take Off a coat, though so far, relatively few people have that much Power and Skill. You may know someone who’s Experienced such a “Miracle Healing,” or Experienced one yourself. I’ve mentioned a few in these pages. They’re common in Homeopathy and Acupuncture, because we’ve been Programmed to Believe in the Allopathic Birdcage that excludes low-profit modalities.

The Bottom Line is that, if you’re Feeling Unwell and your symptoms worsen this weekend, wait until after the 30 November Full Moon to get Scared about it. You may discover that your Fear would have been wasted, as you were just having a “Healing Crisis.” But meanwhile, we have a fabulous Opportunity to watch ourself argue with ourself over which Mental-Emotional Reality we Want to Subscribe to – “I’m gonna Die!” or “I Wonder if I really can Take this Off like a coat.” Have Fun with it.

When you’re in the “Wondering if you really can Take this Off like a coat” role, make the Effort to stay in Curiosity, and Avoid Anal-ysis and Answers and Yes-Buts, and Especially Avoid looking for Mechanisms. If you know the Mechanism, it’s not a Miracle, and you Want to Cultivate Miracles so you can go Directly from Objective to Outcome through enlisting the right Allies and Perspectives, as we will in 5D. More like, “Wouldn’t it be Awesome if I could Take this Off like a coat.” Indulge that “Fantasy,” and see how long you can stay in that “Daydream.” You might start to Recognize other Lifetimes where that sort of Healing was routine.

We’ve been busy working on other Issues and haven’t been talking about it, but don’t forget that we’re only three and a half weeks from the Beginning of the Digital Age (Jupiter-Saturn Conjunctions in Air Signs, this one 21 December 9am PST in 1 Aquarius, 7 hours after the Capricorn Solstice). This replacement for the 200-year Industrial Age (Jupiter- Saturn Conjunctions in Earth Signs) that faded in 1980 to make room for a 20-year Digital Teaser (1980-2000) and a 20-year Industrial Debriefing (2000-2020), will span the next two centuries.

Remember what Life was like when computers only lived in Institutions? The desktop computer became useful for more than hobbyists and feasible on a wide scale when IBM introduced the “PC” with Microsoft “DOS” software, just about the time of the first Jupiter-Saturn Air Conjunction in 1980. At about the same time, clumsy “1G” cellular phone systems were introduced in Japan and Scandinavia (the first iPhone didn’t appear till 2007). A primitive version of Microsoft Windows appeared in 1985. The World Wide Web (then commonly called the “World Wide Wait”) and the “web browser” were introduced in 1991. The “Dot-Com Crash” in 2000 coincided almost to the day with the end of the Digital Teaser (last Earth-Sign Jupiter-Saturn Conjunction).

The Digital Teaser was about more than computing, though most of the other new technologies that came along were enhanced, or even made feasible, by computing. The “rare-earth” Neodymium Magnet, which makes modern electric cars and wind power generation feasible, was developed in 1984. The Lithium-Ion Battery was prototyped in 1985 and commercialized in 1991. Toyota combined these with a small gasoline engine, controlled by computer, in the Prius, the first mass-produced modern electric car, introduced in 1997. Without the higher power output of the Nd Magnet and the light weight of Li-ion Batteries, electric cars never got beyond the golf cart.

On 29 November (4pm PST in 14 Virgo), Vesta (Unconscious Limiting Beliefs) Conjoins Orcus (Breaking Karmic Vows and Decisions). We’ve talked about this a couple of times recently, and it’s a window where Letting Go of Obsolete Habits may be Easier than they would be otherwise. On the other hand you may have to Re-Experience some of the reasons you made those Karmic Vows and Decisions, which could be a Bummer. Be Mindful of this, so you can Focus on the Letting Go instead of being Sucked into the Emotional Drama of the Memories.

Also on 29 November, asteroid Karma leaves Leo and moves into Virgo (6pm PST). The upside here is that Virgo is about Ego Death, and we need Ego Death in order to Jettison our Attachment to Karma, because our Karma is a big part of that Birdcage that keeps us Comfortable but Limited. “Ego” is just Identity. One minute you’re a Nurse or a Construction Worker or a Cook, another you’re a Spouse or a Parent or an Employee, the next you’re Watching TV. “You Are” is a statement of Identity, “You Are X” means that you and X are the same thing.

If you have a heavy Mental-Emotional Investment in being a Nurse or Spouse or TV-Watcher, then that Identity (Ego) will Limit your Ability to Shift your Identity. That’s Ego Death, where our Investment causes us to think “I will Die!” instead of I will Die!” (ie, “My Identity will be Transformed!“), with all of the Emotional Baggage that comes along with Fear of Death. I hope you’re starting to see how we’re tied into a huge Gordian Knot this weekend, where everything is all tangled up with everything else. Keep Fantasizing about how much you’ll Enjoy 5D, where you’re so In Tune with Nature that you know exactly Who to Ask to Manifest any Outcome you Want, without having to Force anything.

Handmaids and Handbaskets

October 28, 2020

Other than the fact that it actually is, there are several astroenergies about these days that can “make” us feel like the World is going to Hell in a Handbasket.

On 22 October 2020 for instance, asteroid Vesta, which symbolizes our Unconscious and Semi-Conscious Limiting Beliefs, entered Virgo, which, representing as it does Ego Death, is big on Criticism. Without Self-Criticism, where would our Motivation arise to propel us into Ego Death? — Which ranges from mostly Unpleasant to, more commonly, I’d rather Die than Do That! In between Self-Criticism and Ego Death, before we muster the Motivation to Actually Change, we Protect our Ego by Projecting our Self-Criticisms onto Others.

When we base our Ego on our Pet Peeves – “I’m not one of those People who…” – we can’t really say that our Limiting Beliefs are Unconscious, we just don’t Own them. So we have to refer to them as Semi-Conscious. If we put some thought into it, and/or enlist our Honest friends, we could all easily catalog our “Unconscious” Limiting Beliefs. They aren’t hidden. They’re writ huge in the current Political Polarity, where some folks are Choosing Homicide over Ego Death. The people with a Compulsive need to Control your Behavior preach about Freedom, while the people who are Compelled to Do what they Want preach about Control.

In my own back yard, I’m Praying that all of the ways my father predicted my Failures are Lit Up because They’re Leaving Town, not because they’re coming home to roost. Meanwhile I’m sure wasting a lot of Energy Fighting them Off. I should be Accepting them, not because he was right about me, but because I have to Accept them as Self-Criticisms before I can Motivate my own Ego Death and Let Them Go for good. Till then I’m driven by the Trance that his repeated disdain installed in the Unconscious that I Live with.

Because I Experienced his Energy as a wet blanket on mine, I used to think that his Saturn must be on my Sun. Once I knew how to check though, I discovered that it’s my Saturn that was on his Sun! Growing up in the Depression, where there were always a hundred people lined up to take whatever job he could get, he had to suppress the Lightheartedness of his Gemini Sun in order to avoid being seen as a flibbertigibbet. Growing up as I did in the 50s and 60s, after his Generation had busted their butts to rebuild a World Economy (not that it’s a solid measure of anything, but it wasn’t until 1954 that the stock market exceeded its 1929 high), my own Gemini Saturn flibbertigibbet was a source of Pride.

Since we’re only a Deflation-Delaying Ongoing Heroic Monetary Stimulus or a Hyperinflation away from our next Great Depression – many are already there – it’s appropriate that my father’s Information would emerge for me now from the Unconscious. I even had a vivid dream yesterday of setting up a homeless camp for myself in an empty corner of a strip mall. My camp wasn’t protected from rain or cold, it had no latrine or provision for food or sleep, but because it featured what have more or less been prize possessions for me for much of my Life, I was happy with it. Bookcases! It was made of Empty Bookcases. Clap your hands! Till strangers feigning Authority started prying them apart looking for contraband and woke me up.

So Virgo will be Lighting Up all of our Self-Limiting Beliefs, until mid-July 2021. Mostly we’ll Experience these as Judgments of Other People. It’s Safe to assume that whatever we Judge in Others is a caricature of an important part of Ourself that we don’t Allow to Express itself. These caricatures are Funhouse Mirrors and are seldom easy to decypher, especially anal-ytically. Since we’ve banished them to Live in the Unconscious, we’re more likely to find success by PIAVAing them.

We may be particularly Open to Insight around 9-10 November, as Vesta is Strong then (Standing Still), while the Moon crosses it. That begins our real Ego Death Curriculum, as Vesta enters what astrologers call its “Shadow Period,” the window of its Retrogradation. Between 9 November 2020 and 27 June 2021, Vesta Dances across 7-22 Virgo three times. If this process unfolds like it often does, our Troublesome Semi-Conscious Evil Twins will Act Out between 9 November 2020 and 19 January 2021. They may be especially Active around 7 December and 4 January, when the Moon visits Vesta.

Vesta first crosses 7 Virgo on 9 October, and then on 19 January, in 22 Virgo, it turns Retrograde and starts moving Backwards. It Retrogrades from 22 back to 7 Virgo until 20 April 2021. During this period we should be gaining Insight into our Projected Self-Judgments, with a boost from the Moon around 1 and 27 February and 26 March.

Finally, after 20 April, we enter the “Confidence-Building” phase, as Vesta moves forward (“Direct”) again, crossing 7-22 Virgo for the third time – by then we’ll have become “Old Hands” at using Ego Death to Claim our Projected Self-Judgments as Our Own, and if we Succeed we’ll be much closer to the Unconditional Self-Love that we need to move into The Light. The Moon will again Clarify things around 23 April, 20 May, and 17 June, and we Graduate from the whole Retrograde Adventure on 27 June 2021.

And when any planet Dances across the same patch of astrological surreal estate thrice, it’s going to get pretty Intimate with any other planet that happens to be Dancing in that same patch at the same time. So, anybody Sitting Around in the middle half of Virgo these days?

Yes, dwarf planet Orcus. “Does anybody remember Orcus,” as Robert Plant famously almost sang? The Fearsome Mythic Orcus worked for the Pre-Romans, Punishing Oath-Breakers. With Women closer to Property than People in those days, Relationship Oaths weren’t the Issue so much as Loyalty Oaths for soldiers and servants and perhaps business dealings. The problem with Oaths, and their equivalents Vows, Promises, Commitments, and even Decisions, is that they’re Sticky. These days, many of us Swear a lot, casually. We may want to reconsider what we’re Doing there.

Since we Feared the Punishment for Oath-Breaking, we worked hard to Avoid it, and the Easiest way to do that was to “Forget” that it was a Decision (which could theoretically be Renegotiated), and instead consider it to be Just The Way Things Are. If we can succeed at that, Reneging doesn’t even seem possible. And while we may not be able to take Money with us from one Lifetime to the next, we can certainly take Attitudes. So when we Forget a Decision and it becomes Just The Way Things Are, it becomes Karma, and will Follow us around till we figure out What we need to Renounce, and How to do it.

The How is actually Easy, we just need to Realize that a Limitation isn’t Just The Way Things Are, it’s Just our Karma, and Karma is only Sticky because we’re so Comfortable thinking that it’s Just The Way Things Are. The What is a bigger question, being another Funhouse Mirror that we’re probably Projecting on Others. If we aren’t always in Abundance (Having Enough to Share) in our current Lifetime for instance, When and To Whom might “we” have Sworn an Oath of Poverty or the equivalent? Maybe that Convent in France in the 7th Century? Or was it even on Earth? Maybe we were a Coyote and felt sorry for the Squirrels.

That kind of info isn’t always the Easiest to Retrieve, especially with “Left Brain” methods. We’ll be rooting in the Unconscious, so we’ll need PIAVA again. Maybe something like a Theta – “God/Goddess, Creator of All There Is, I Command that I Connect to All of my Vows of [e.g. Poverty] in All of my Lifetimes. It Is Done, It Is Done, It Is Done. Thank You, God/Goddess. Show Me!” We don’t need to Remember them all – there may be a bewildering number. We just need to Flash on our Frame of Mind and Heart while we were Swearing the Oath.

Then, while we’re there, we may need some sort of Renunciation Ritual. Writing and Burning perhaps, or “Revert!“, or whatever works for you. Another Theta might work, maybe “God/Goddess, Creator of All There Is, I Command that I Now Lovingly, Gently, Rapidly, and Completely Renounce All of my Vows of [Poverty] in All of my Lifetimes. It Is Done, It Is Done, It Is Done. Thank You, God/Goddess. Show Me!”

If you don’t Feel a sense of Immediate Liberation, check to see if you skipped over a Yes-But or two. Then Tap Out any remaining Resistance – “Even though I have Resistance to Letting Go of [Poverty], I Deeply and Completely Love and Accept Myself…” Then repeat your Renunciation Theta, and alternate Theta and Tapping till you Feel the Liberation you Want. If it’s not working, sleep on it and try again tomorrow. We can’t always Change Lifetimes of Habit in a single sitting.

Vesta first crosses Orcus on 29 November (4pm PST), in 14 Virgo, while both planets are Direct (moving forward). Considering the Players, this may be a fairly Explosive Experience, as our Unconscious Limitation literally “Meets its Maker.” We usually refer to this first of the three events in a Triple-Crossing as a “Can-Opener,” as a Can of Worms often appears in our Life, sometimes fairly Traumatically. If you have any natal planets in mid-Virgo, that’ll Complicate matters and make the Experience more Intense.

We can often dodge Trauma just by knowing that such an event is about to occur. If, say, our natal Mars is in mid-Virgo, and wee’re Conscious that an “Event” is about to Go Off, we can be Alert for any sign that Anger or Physical Injury is about to happen, and Revert it. A few days prior, we can Theta that we’ll be particularly Alert for the next week. A few Kegels can Slow Time for us so we can be more Aware. Sometimes nothing happens just because we’re Aware. Even if a Trauma sneaks up on us, as they often do, knowing what was going on astrologically can help us interpret “our own” role in the event and Neutralize our Victimhood.

We aren’t “Blaming the Victim” for Traumatic events, we’re Recognizing that Life is Fully Interactive. We actually Invite our Experiences, sometimes Consciously and sometimes Unconsciously. When we can Intuit or Figure Out Who in the Underwhere is Inviting our Unpleasant Experiences, we can Ask them what their Needs and Wants are, remind them of our then-Ego’s Needs and Wants, and Renegotiate with them to move toward Win-Win, where each of our “parts” is helping the other Achieve their Goals.

In this process “both of us” are usually Changed, as we move toward Knowing that We Are They and They Are Us and eventually Drop All Separation. This is the Growth in Consciousness that asteroid Juno presides over. What’s Juno got to do with all this? As we speak, Juno is Quintiling Vesta, and Quintiles (one fifth of the Zodiac or 72 Degrees) are about Teaching and Learning. On 29 November, Juno will Quintile Vesta-Orcus.

Also on 29 November, Neptune will be Standing Still (Strong) in Pisces, roughly Opposite Vesta-Orcus. Neptune likes to Confuse everything Material so we can Clearly see the Spiritual side of things. We may also be Letting Go of Abuse Patterns (Nessus Opposite Vesta-Orcus), Discovering Unexpected Heart Truths (Aletheia Quincunx V-O), Breaking Patterns that have Inhibited our Rebirth (Klotho Unx V-O), and Enjoying Clarity on Guilt and Codependence (Nemesis Sextile and Hylonome Trine V-O). Busy day – mark your calendar!

We refer to the second event of a Triple-Crossing as the “Exposition,” because it usually Exposes much more about whatever occurred at the Can-Opener. At any Exposition, the faster planet (here Vesta) will be Retrograde, which will Slow whatever processes are occurring so we can see them more Clearly. In this case, Orcus will also be Retrograde. The Vesta-Orcus Exposition occurs on 13 March 2021 in 13 Virgo.

We call the final of the three crossings a “Confidence-Builder,” because by now, if we’ve been Paying Attention, we’re Experienced with the Collision and Collusion of these two Energies, and we know how to Respond. The Vesta-Orcus Confidence-Builder happens on 25 May 2021 in 12 Virgo. Orcus is Standing Still and Turning Direct (Strongest) when this occurs, so we can Expect it to be particularly Powerful.

That’s one of the astroevents that can help us feel like the World is going to Hell in a Handbasket. The other Biggie is asteroid Nemesis (Guilt and Ego Death) moving into Scorpio (Fearlessness about Getting to the Bottom of Things). That happened a few days ago, on 26 October (2:40 pm PDT). Actually, both Nemesis and Scorpio can Feel a lot more ominous than either Vesta or Virgo, so hopefully we’ll have time to write soon about how this will Unfold. Nemesis only stays in Scorpio for three months, though it returns for seven weeks next summer.

And while we’re on the subject of Sign Changes, asteroid Klotho (Beginning New TimeLines) moved into Libra (Meeting Other) on 17 October for three months. That was probably a Relief after nine weeks in Virgo, where we would have been Clearing Resistance to Being Reborn.

Charts of the Portals XV

September 27, 2020

In Charts of the Portals XII we were talking about the chart of the 28-29 September 2020 Saturn-Chaos Stations (The Most Important Thing Is to Look Beyond Your Perceived Limitations – If You Could Do Miracles, What Would They Be?) chart…

and its red-triangle Challenges (T-Squares), particularly the Saturn-Chariklo-Pluto Challenge (The Most Important Thing may be to Remember that any Sign of Self-Doubt will be a Red Alert that our Thoughts are leaning toward the Old Paradigm, just when we need to Remain Conscious that the Paradigm is Shifting and we need to Shift with it).

We were about to talk about the Complicated “base” of that Challenge, the Opposition between Mars-Lilith-Eris (Actively Rooting Out Places Where We Deny to Ourself that We Give Away Our Power) on one side and Sappho-Juno-Haumea (Rebirth into Greater Consciousness about the Unconditionality of Our Self-Love) on the other.  We were suggesting that this Opposition should provide Clues about Why It may be Difficult to Maintain Our Confidence that we can Respond Resiliently to the Big Changes that Are Going On.

It’s really Easy to dwell on the minor details of our Daily Lives and Miss the Big Picture, especially when we’re Enervated, as the Big Changes themselves are likely to do to us.  How many of us Understand after all what Kundalini Rising (Varuna-Karma in the Global Climate Change chart) is Supposed to Feel Like.  We’re Hypnotized by Big Pharma to reach for a Drug whenever we’re Uncomfortable, because they’ve made us Believe that Discomfort is to be Avoided at all costs.

If we looked to Cause rather than Symptom, we’d Know that we’re in the middle of a Huge Ego Death (which is why we sometimes feel like we’re “dying,” and occasionally wishing we were).  Rebirth – into Greater Consciousness about the Unconditionality of Our Self-Love – is the flip side of Ego Death.  Unconditional Self-Love includes always Loving whatever is Going On for us in the Present Moment.

Can we really Love Ourself Unconditionally while Aching All Over?  Well, that’s the Assignment.  Find the place in your Body where your Discomfort is Greatest, and just Focus your Attention on it Intensely.  Attention is kind of Love Step One.  Hold your Attention there.  Fear is Hard and Cold, Love is Soft and Warm.  Put your hand on your Discomfort and Warm it Up.  Imagine Softening around it.  When your Attention Wanders, bring it back.  When your Discomfort moves, which it will do, Follow it.  You’ll be Surprised by the Miracles you Create doing this.

Actively Rooting Out Places Where We Deny to Ourself that We Give Away Our Power isn’t much more Fun than Ego Death.  We have Ego Invested in those Places, often Deeply Invested.  Ego is very often Embedded more Deeply in our Body than our Teeth are, and you know how much Fun it is when someone Roots around Trying to Pull Out your TeethIf we Deny these Places to ourself, unless we’re Graced with Insight (which is entirely possible, given the astrology, but we’ll have to Recognize it), that means they’re Unconscious, so we’ll have to use PIAVAs to reach down into the basement and find them.

Since we’re working with Self-Love, you’ll want to add Lovingly and Gently to your PIAVAs.  For instance, a Theta might be something like…

God/Goddess, Creator of All That Is, I Command that I Lovingly and Gently Begin to Recognize the Places Where I Give Away My Power, and that I Begin to Intuit How to Lovingly and Gently Claim My Power Instead.  It Is Done, It Is Done, It Is Done.  Thank You, God/Goddess.  Show Me!

Heavy Fortnight 1

June 1, 2020

Marilyn Raffaele’s Channeling of the Arcturians for today is a fabulous summary of our recent Expansion of Consciousness Adventure…

https://onenessofall.com/newest.html

 

“To help children feel that they aren’t alone with their feelings,” my friend Kalli Dakos, an acclaimed children’s book author (see https://www.amazon.com/s?k=kalli+dakos&ref=nb_sb_noss_1 and http://www.kallidakos.com/), educational consultant, and thoroughly delightful person, offers as her generous Gift to the World these wonderful poems for children about COVID-19.  I sobbed all the way through them.  Please share them with parents and teachers, and anyone who works with children, that you know

http://www.kallidakos.com/covid19.html

 

Heavy two weeks coming, on many counts.  It’s 5-12 June 2020 that’s likely to be Heaviest, but the more Sensitive among us will already be Feeling it Beginning.  Here’s a skeleton outline of our June Gauntlets…

  • 5 June (12:12 pm PDT) – Heavy Full Moon (many reasons; in 16 Sagittarius).
  • 6 June (11:15 am PDT) to 8 June (8:15 am PDT) – Probable Excess Emotionality (Moon Out of Bounds in 30 Sagittarius-25 Capricorn).
  • Until 10 June (11:15 am PDT) – Probable Excess Polarization (asteroid Aletheia [Truth of the Heart] Stationary in 15 Aquarius).
  • Until 12 June (6:30 am PDT) – Abuse and Privilege are Prominent (dwarf planet Nessus [Abuse and Privilege] Stationary in 14 Pisces).
  • Until 15 June (2:50 am PDT) – Opportunity to Let Go of Karma (asteroid Moira [Fate and Choice] Stationary in 8 Scorpio).  Two weeks after the big demonstrations.
  • Until 18 June (11am PDT) – We Get What We Ask For, literally, with the Unconscious Asking as well (dwarf planet Makemake [Manifestation] Stationary in 5 Libra).
  • Until 19 June – Invitation to Liberate our Hidden Genius (South Node [Karma] crosses dwarf planet Ixion [Forbidden Genius]).
  • 20 June (9:30 pm PDT) to 22 June (8pm PDT) – Probable Excess Emotionality (Moon Out of Bounds in 30 Gemini to 25 Cancer).
  • 20 June (10:45 pm PDT) – Self-Love New Moon in 1 Cancer.
  • Until 22 June (9:30 pm PDT) – Confusion (Neptune [Material Confusion, Spiritual Clarity] Stationary in 21 Pisces).
  • Until 29 June (11pm PDT) – Regression to 5 April (Jupiter Conjunct Pluto [Expansion Required] in 25 Capricorn).

Those many reasons for the Heaviness of the 5 June Full Moon?

#1. The Full Moon in 16 Sagittarius Channels (sits in front of) a Cosmically Immense Weight (a place we can’t see, because it’s behind the Milky Way, that has such Immense Gravity that it’s sucking everything toward it; it’s called the Great Attractor, in 15 Sagittarius).

#2. Our Essence (the Full-Moon Sun in 16 Gemini) is sandwiched between the symbol for Ending Timelines (asteroid Atropos) and the symbol for our Held Emotions (asteroid Karma), those we’d rather Die than Feel.  That is, We would rather Die than Feel – Facing these Emotions requires an Ego Death.

#3. The Full Moon is Challenged (T-Squared) by Abuse and our Angry Memories thereof, and by our Guilt about our Privilege (Stationary dwarf planet Nessus [Abuse and Privilege] Conjunct Mars [Anger] in 14-16 Pisces).

However, the Abuse and Anger are Merged with the symbol for Sustainability (dwarf planet Ceres).  How would we make Anger and Abuse Sustainable?  We’d use PIAVAs and Healthy Anger – ie, Good Boundaries – to Recognize and Revert Abuse without Creating unnecessary Limitations for ourself and without Alienating non-Abusers.  Subtle and Sophisticated, but this Combination gives us the Opportunity to Practice Finessing such a thing.

It can also be an Opportunity for us to Practice Actions (Mars) that Sustain (Ceres) our Willingness to Receive Abundance without painting it with Privilege (Nessus) and Guilt (Mars).  To work on Letting Go of having to Deserve Abundance, and Recognizing it as our Birthright.

#4. The Full Moon is also Challenged (T-Squared) by Guilt (asteroid Nemesis) and Karmic Limitations (dwarf planet Orcus [Oath-Making and -Breaking])Karma is formed by making an Oath or Vow or Promise or Decision, working hard to toe the line, forgetting we made the Oath, and coming to Believe that toeing this line is not just a Decision, but the Right Thing to Do or even the Only Thing to Do (Orcus)A formal Oath adds Social Pressure.  This puts us into Either/Or Dualistic Morality, which excludes not just the Other Side of the Duality, but the Other Dimensions as well – Unconscious Limitations in other words.

We interpret this Energy (Nemesis) as the Painful Experience of Ego Death, or the Need for Ego Death because it’s our Olde Ego that stands between us and our PIAVAed Goals.  The Ego’s justification, Consciously or Unconsciously, for Avoiding a worthwhile Ego Death, is often Loyalty to a long-forgotten Oath (Orcus).  In other words, this is an Opportunity to Practice Liberation via Oath-Breaking.

That however, will bring the wrath of both Nemesis (Mystic Punisher of Wrong-Doers) and Orcus (Mythic Punisher of Oath-Breakers) upon us – which we will then have to Recognize as Ego Death, and Endure it while Focusing on the Unknown Freedom that lies on the Far Side of it.

But there’s Good News – this Heavy Issue #4 is Self-Resolving (a Diamond Star Configuration), so any Work we do on it is Extra Credit, and we may not have to do any Work at all.

Many of you have already figured out that we’ve described a Grand Cross, with is usually about many smallish Hassles that end up Complementing one another while we end up very busy keepin’ on keepin’ on, and practicing our multi-tasking.

But it’s still a very heavy chart for very heavy times.  The 5 June Full Moon, the 10 June Aletheia Station, and 12 June Nessus Station are all on the same chart (ie, their impacts may not be easily Separable from one another) because they all happen in the same week in nearly the same Degrees, 14-16 Degrees of their respective Signs.  As the beginning of a Lunar Phase we’d expect the Full Moon to impact at least the following two weeks; as an asteroid Station we’d expect the Aletheia Station to impact the preceding several days; as a dwarf-planet Station we’d expect the Nessus Station to impact at least the preceding week, and Overlap usually means Merging…

The Most Important Thing 4

May 21, 2020

 

In the land of the Deaf, the One-Eared is King.

 

For the 22 May 2020 (9:30 am PDT) New Moon in 3 Gemini, which applies to the next several weeks, we’re back to the 10 May Priorities Energy (Saturn Station) that we described in The Most Important Thing 2 post (the chart with the one-eared Flying Squirrel).

That was a week and a half ago, so some of the Players have Changed.  For instance, at that time Self-Love (asteroid Sappho) was the major Challenge (T-Square).  For the New Moon, the major Challenge is Manifestation (dwarf planet Makemake).  While the Object of the Challenge has changed, the Source (base of the T-Square) has not.  It’s our Life Path (Nodal Axis).

Yes, we absolutely believe in Destiny.  If you insist on remaining Unconscious.  The more Conscious we become, the more we replace Fate with Choice.  We each have a Life Mission (North Node), but it’s waaay more Multidimensional than our Dualistic Mind can grasp.  It doesn’t hurt to try, as long as you add “…or something like that” to every attempt.  In order to move toward our Life Mission, we need tools that we can only get by facing down our Held Emotions (South Node), the ones that We’d rather Die than Feel.

Oops, we put the accent on the wrong syl-ob‘ble (syllable).  It’s We’d rather Die than Feel – we don’t do Held Emotions without an Ego Death.  Ego Death is of course the second stage of Growth in Consciousness.  The first stage is Confusion, though there’s a lot of interbreeding between Ego Death and Confusion.  After the pregnancy, we Birth a new, more Conscious Ego, if we’re willing to do the Work.

Doing the Work has two parts.  The first is being willing to Tolerate our Confusion without Killing It – Killing Confusion means Trying to Figure Out (thinking) Why (again, thinking) we’re Confused so we can make it Go Away.  Confusion is an Emotion in its own right, and one of the more Powerful, if subtle, Emotions we have.  The Patriarchy gets its toxic aversion to Change by banning Confusion from polite company.   It’s not macho.

The second part of the Work is being willing to Sit Through our Ego Death without Running Away from it.  Sitting through Ego Death means Opening to whatever Emotions arise (not macho) and being Loving and Gentle (again, not macho) with them .

Yes, there will be Stories, but they aren’t necessary.  We can briefly Appreciate them, but we want to dismiss them quickly, so we can Pay as much Attention as possible to the Emotion.  The Stories are more thinking, and like Chocolate-covered quicksand, they’re totally Compelling, and difficult to escape from.  Addictive even.  How many people do you know who are Addicted to their Victim Stories?

What Victim Stories are You Addicted to?  They might make good material for you to practice on, Separating Emotion from Thinking, and using Sensation as a Guide to keep you Feeling and not Thinking.

There’s a good reason why the word Feeling applies both to Sensation and Emotion.

A good way to Open to an Emotion is to Locate it, or any Discomfort, in our Body, and put All of our Attention on that spot, while we watch what’s happening for us Emotionally.  Put your hand on that spot to warm it – Love is Soft and Warm, Fear is Cold and Hard.  If you can’t find the Emotion in your Body, or there are many Discomforts, just pick the most likely spot, while trying not to think about it.  You want to Feel it, not Think it.

Emotions don’t have grammatical Objects.  You’re never Angry At [xyz], you’re just Angry.  You’re never Sad About [abc], you’re just Sad.  The grammatical Objects we love to add to Feelings are thinking, not Feeling.  Putting an Object on an Emotion freezes you in Time, and Emotions are Timeless, especially Held or Karmic Emotions.  And if an Emotion is difficult for you to Tolerate, and difficult to Let Go Of, you can bet it’s Karmic.

When an Emotion is Karmic, its roots are not in the Current Lifetime, so dwelling on some Current-Lifetime Chagrin will never touch it.  And a Karmic Emotion will be cemented in by a zillion iterations, so if you have a Story about it from a different Lifetime, dwelling on that Story is just more Karmic masturbation.  It won’t Impregnate you with a new Ego that sports Expanded Consciousness.  Just more Thinking when you need Feeling.

When our Attention Wanders, as it will, frequently, we just Lovingly and Gently bring our Attention back to where there’s Discomfort in our Body.  No Judgment.  It Is What It Is.  When the Discomfort Moves, we’ve succeeded.  We can Follow it, if we still have Attention to spare, or we can Change the Subject, wait a while, and see that happens.

From https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/2012/11/05/curiosity-and-the-void-ii/

PIAVA, in case you’ve forgotten or tuned in recently, stands for Pray-Intend-Ask-Visualize-Affirm.  Each is basically similar, but some work better for some of the people some of the time…  The Magnetic Feminine manifestation process runs PIAVA, Change the Subject, Pay Attention.  You have to Change the Subject (or as the Buddhists put it, Lose Your Mind) because if you keep thinking about it, your Old Birdcage will constrain your Reality to be the way it’s always been.  And you have to Pay Attention because whenever you PIAVA anything, the first thing that the Universe provides is information about why you haven’t had what you’re asking for all along.”

As it was in our Priorities Energy, our Karma in the New Moon Energy is all about Recovering our Hidden and Forbidden Genius (South Node [Held Emotions] Conjunct dwarf planet Ixion [our Unique Genius]…) so we can “fix” Climate Change (…and dwarf planets Pholus [Are we Missing anything?] and Quaoar [Survival]).  This is a Unique Opportunity that occurs only every nineteen or so years, when our Hidden and Forbidden Genius and our Held Emotions Converge (South Node Conjunct Ixion).

We’re all troubled by Serious Problems that are much bigger than our usual Span of Control, be they Climate Change, outacontrolavirus, bumpstocks, coyotes, politics, clearcutting, Roundup, in-laws, oligarchies, taxes, overpopulation, locusts, food insecurity, pigshit lagoons, coal ash, people running around nude under their clothes, undsoweiter ecosìvia adinfinitum.

The fact that our Forbidden Genius is Verboten is almost certainly Karmic.  If you’ve ever had a Fantasy about having Superpowers and Fixing some Problem much larger than your usual Span of Control, or even publicly Expressing your Frustration about the Problem, you’re Touching your Forbidden Genius.

The World Mirrors our Inner Balance, so we all have our own Inner Climate Change process happening – we’re all Denying chronic Problems that we Believe are beyond our Span of Control because they’re hiding behind our Limiting Unconscious Beliefs.  We Deny them because it’s a healthy way to deal with Issues that would just overwhelm our current Ego.  And there’s a strong correlation between our Limiting Unconscious Beliefs and our Held Emotions.

To touch the Edges of your Held Emotions, Focus on What You Feel when you contemplate your Obsession with the Global or Personal Problems that seem to be beyond your Power to Change.

To touch the Edges of your Forbidden Genius, Focus on What You Feel when you have that Superpower Fantasy.

Then Change the Subject, and tune in tomorrow to see if anything Feels different.  Then rinse and repeat.

More to follow…