Archive for the ‘Identity’ Category

Karma Repair 5

May 21, 2019

A friend of mine recently intended to say “I’m Hungry” and it came out as “I’m Angry” – that’s how Subtle these Energies are.  They’re Opportunities; often our Karma is a lot more In-Our-Face, and it will be again if we continue to pass on the Subtle Opportunities.

Here’s the chart for the 23 May (5pm PDT) Station of Orcus in 10 Virgo, drawn in the lighter lines.  The heavier lines show the closely related 19 May Merger of Saturn with the Mean South Node in 21 Capricorn (see the previous Karma Repair posts)…

You can see that the T-Square (red triangle) containing Orcus is focused on asteroid Ceres (which would be called “Cup-Hook” if we named planets after their glyphs).  In other words, the main issue here is Sustainability.  Not just Can We Let Go of Our Karma, but also Can We Continue to Choose Otherwise?

The third corner of this T-Square triangle is dwarf planet Nessus – Abuse and Privilege.  So it’s not just Letting Go of Our Karma, it’s Permanently Letting Go of Abuse, which means Naming it what it is, and Setting Firm Boundaries around it.  And yes, asteroid Pallas (Boundaries – the diamond on a cross) is involved, in a very positive way (a Quincunx Bridge – green lines – across the Orcus-Nessus Opposition; a Quincunx Bridge means it’s Grace unless we try to Anal-yze it).

But who is this Orcus fellow?  He was a pre-Roman Etruscan God-figure whose job was to Punish Oath-Breakers.  Strikes Terror, eh?  How many times have we been threatened with Dire Consequences if we Break an Oath?  The Yangtegrity Patriarchy made a big deal of Oaths, but hereabouts we lean more toward Yintegrity, as does our 5D future.  Oaths are spawn of Duality, and we prefer to Relate to the Universe as Unitary and Multifarious.  It’s the Limited mind that has great difficulty getting past Either/Or Duality.  When we aren’t In the Flow and Living Intuitively, then Yangtegrity is useful.  But it keeps us in 3D; Either/Or is Political, Both/And is Spiritual.

It turns out that our Unconscious Limiting Beliefs have their roots in forgotten Oaths that we made a long time ago, often in other Lifetimes.  The All-or-Nothing, Unconditional nature of Oaths is a side-effect of Duality.  The rest of Life is Situational.  We don’t Vow never to cross the street, we Vow to look both ways and cross only when it’s Safe – we use the “rule” if it fits the Situation; if it doesn’t fit, we look for Alternatives.  One way to interpret the impact of Ceres in this T-Square, is that it Invites us to Let Go of our Unconditional Oaths – the last thing we want to do is Sustain our Self-Sabotage!

With Nessus involved, we have to consider examples involving Abuse.  When Uncle Andy violated us and warned that they’d kill Mom if we told anyone, of course we Vowed never to tell.  And of course we Forgot it, because we worked our butt off to Forget the whole Trauma.  So how does that Vow impact our Lives now?  What if we PIAVAed to Open up that Wound so we could Let it Go?  Would this Vow prevent that Opening from happening?  It would probably do its best to try.  Meanwhile, what Experiences does the Vow prevent us from Indulging?

Unfortunately, the Unconscious often agitates for its own Clearing.  So we may be attracted to Abusers, or to the Abused, and we may have difficulty Breaking this “Habit” until we Clear the origin.  We may not Trust other people, or we may need to keep them at a Distance.  We may have to deal with Suffocation issues that aren’t really “ours.”  These Limits may interfere with What We Really Want out of Life – our Souls are more than clever enough to set up Life circumstances where the only way we can get what we Want most is to Confront our Limits.  That’s the nature of the Nodal Axis.

But, the Orcus-Nessus Opposition (Reverting Oaths involving Abuse or Privilege) is also Bridged by blue lines, or Grace (the Trine Bridge to asteroid Nemesis, which symbolizes Ego Death). Ego Death doesn’t need to be Traumatic, though it depends on our Beliefs about how much of our Life is critically Dependent on that particular Ego.  But Trust me, there are a thousand other potential Egos waiting in the wings to take over, and most of them will do a fine job.

The Egos that won’t do a fine job, will connect you to ancillary issues that you also need to Clear in order to Liberate yourself.  You can even Modulate the pace of your Ego-Clearing – all you need to do is Ask.  “God/Goddess, please lead me Lovingly, Gently, Rapidly, and Completely through the process of Liberating myself from Abuse Memories and any resulting Oaths I (or a former Incarnation) may have made as a result,” for instance.  This is a Trine Bridge, it’s the Easy Path around the difficulty.  Asking for What You Want is a fabulous way to Accept Grace.

Karma Repair 2

May 17, 2019

Not a lot happening with the 18 May (2pm PDT) Full Moon, except that it could make a big dent in our Fear of Opening Up to the Truth about our Hidden Forbidden Unique Genius, the one that will Singlehandedly Save the Planet, along with all the other Single Hands that this Full Moon will help Liberate from their Fear of Opening Up to the Truth about their Forbidden Genies.  Our Hidden Forbidden Unique Genius is the missing piece in the Jigsaw Puzzle that is our 5D Future, and so is Everyone Else’s.

Which is to say that the symbol for Endings (asteroid Atropos) Resolves (Trine Bridges) the Full Moon that prominently features the symbol for Converting Fear to Power (dwarf planet Sedna stands behind the Sun) and is Supported by (Finger of God-ed by) the symbol for our Forbidden Genius (dwarf planet Ixion) and the Merged (Conjoined) symbols for Rebirth and Truth (dwarf planet Haumea and asteroid Veritas)…

All in all an excellent chart, if we Remember our Kegels.

This Full Moon though is greatly overshadowed by the 19 May Merging of the symbol for The Most Important Thing (Planet) and the symbol for our Karma (the Mean South Node).  If you feel like you’re Sitting Pretty, look behind you.  There’s something lurking there that may not be Negative, but will Certainly help you Clean Up your Current Lifetime.  Remember what Alan Watts said back in the 1950s – it’s a lot harder to Let Go of our Good Karma than it is to Let Go of our Bad Karma.

Because we’re so fond of Patting ourselves on the Back for our Good Karma.  But we’ll be a lot more Effective at Changing the World if we’re Neutral.  Self-Love ain’t Positive Self-Judgment.  Self-Love is Unconditional, no Judgment involved.  The Demon lurking behind you could be Pride.

And of course it could also be all manner of Self-Sabotaging Habits, the kind we usually think of as Karma and Blame on “the Universe,” or Mom, forgetting that All of our Habits are Choices we’ve made in the past.  Is this a Free-Will Universe or not?  Free Will cuts both ways.  Of course we don’t Remember making that Choice, it was a hundred Past Lives ago.  Or a Parallel in a Galaxy far far away.

But as Seth put it so Clearly in The Nature of Personal Reality, our Karma is actually Obvious – it’s writ large in our Personal History in our Current Lifetime.  What in your Personal History do you not claim as your own Choice?  Those are the places where you’re Betraying your own Soul.  Of course your Current Ego didn’t make that Choice, because if you think of “You” as your Current Ego, you’re missing 99% of your Life.

If there’s anything in our Personal History, Good or Bad, that we don’t claim as our own Choice, whose Choice was it?  It was part of our Soul Self that our Current Ego doesn’t include.  We need to do some Ego Yoga.  It’s not as hard as it sounds.  Our Ego’s in it for Pleasure; our Soul’s in it for Experience, including Experiences that will – and have – Terrified or Horrified our Ego.

This is what a Free-Will Universe means.  If you aren’t in a Free-Will Universe, you’re just another automaton on the treadmill, where everything happens to you, and you have little or no Control.  That might be Liberating, since what you do won’t matter.  You may as well Take whatever Pleases you.  But can you even Conceive of a Universe without Cause and Effect?  That’s pretty Deep Programming.  Easier to Conceive of a Universe where we don’t have enough Information to sleuth out Cause and Effect.  And more Honest.

Let’s look at the Saturn-South Node chart tomorrow.  That’ll give you time to see what’s behind you.

Earth Repair 2 and Karma Repair 1

May 12, 2019

The Global Earth Repair Conference is YouTubing its sessions so we can watch them free.  Since there were about 200 sessions in seven or eight time slots, there are lot of sessions I wasn’t able to attend either, even when I hopped from one session to another in one time slot, which I did whenever I wasn’t Learning a lot.  Not that the sessions lacked quality – I just read a lot and Earth Repair is one of my favorite topics.  I’m much more Optimistic after the Conference than I was before – many of the presenters are already Living in 5D.

Here are a couple of samples…

“When it comes to survival and sustainability, there’s only one story for the human species, and we’re all in this together…  We know when we see a forest, a lake, the ocean, a natural river system, the atmosphere, that it’s more valuable than computers, cars, airplanes, which are valuable for a short time, then become trash and pollution…  If we truly value natural systems, then Nature would truly become the basis of our money and our economy.  To protect Nature then would not be a luxury, but a necessity.”  –John D. Liu, in…

“We’re extremely conflicted and I think it has something to do with two levels of development – our brains are wired for survival, which means anger, jealousy, fear, territoriality, self-esteem, all the things that cause trouble.  And our brains are also wired for beauty and connection and spirituality, and I think it’s a crisis time for us to begin to overcome this hardcore biological survival wiring and begin to activate our spiritual wiring – the forebrain.

“Buddhism does that well with mindfulness and meditation, and the other traditions that do this.  It’s almost like we’re at a crisis point, not just of the Earth, but of our own human journey.  Are we going to give in and basically dissolve?  Will we be a failed experiment?  Or, are we at the beginning of an incredibly exciting part of our journey as we begin to become more human in the sense of truly connected to loving and nurturing all life?”  –Susan Eirich in…

Find out more about Susan at https://earthfireinstitute.org/our-story/, and about John at https://www.commonland.com/en and https://www.ecosystemrestorationcamps.org/foundation/john-d-liu/.  The Conference sessions that have been YouTubed so far are listed at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNPSTkjWIrl7FD31xbJ5STg/videos.  Planning is underway for followup Earth Repair Conferences in Chile, Africa, and India.

Meanwhile, in another galaxy far far away…

https://danielscranton.com/galactic-energies-within-you-%e2%88%9ethe-9d-arcturian-council/

“We are very excited about the progress that we see you all making in regards to the accessing of more of your galactic energies.  You are all receiving activations all the time to awaken within you those parts of yourselves that are not from Earth, or your solar system.  And we can see how these activations are affecting all of you in a positive way.  Much of what you are attempting to resolve there on planet Earth at this time is related to those journeys that you have taken through all the different star systems in our galaxy.

“And so, by becoming more of the whole you, you are better equipped to handle the challenges you face right now on planet Earth.  We see you getting activated and then taking what energies you are accessing from within to the different challenges that you face in your lives.  Even though you still have much to resolve there on planet Earth, you are also bringing a lot to the party because of all that you have already experienced in your lifetimes in other parts of the galaxy.

“You draw from those Sirian, Andromedan, Pleiadian, Arcturian, and other lifetimes, and when you bring those energies forward, you make it easier for yourselves to reconcile the differences that you have there on your planet.  For example, most people are split politically.  They either go in all into one political party or all into another, and they see the others who are putting all of their energy into a different political party as the enemy.  This is a much more toned down version of the battles that have existed throughout our galaxy for millions and millions of years.

“When you recognize that you contain all of those energies inside of you, and you make it your mission to be integrated, then you can be a walking example of what it is like to bring different energies, different beliefs, different star systems, together.  And if you can do that, you certainly can resolve the differences between you and the others there on Earth who have very different beliefs.

“This is why you often find that you are the [sheep of color] in your family.  Those of you who are awake are often the only ones who have the beliefs that you do, and it then falls upon you to make peace with the fact that everyone else that you are related to by blood thinks differently.  And when you can do that, and you can make peace with the differences between you, then you know that you are becoming more integrating with all of the galactic energies that you have inside of you, and you are moving closer and closer to that fifth dimensional reality where all beings co-exist harmoniously.  So keep up the good work.”

And on a galaxy much closer to Home, our Cosmic Recess window is beginning to close, as we’re now only seven days from the planetary equivalent of The Most Important Thing Is Your Karma (Saturn Conjunct the Mean South Node).  “Mean” here means Average, not Cruel, though from the Ego’s Perspective, Cruel wouldn’t be far off the mark.

John Liu reminds us that when our Ecosystem Collapses, nothing is more Important or Valuable than some degree of Restoration.  Jack Rosenberg (in Body, Self, & Soul) points out that when the Ego shatters, nothing is more Important and Valuable than Restoring a functioning Ego, because you’ll just make a big mess of anything else you try to do.  And I (among others) aver that when we’re trying to Manifest something Difficult for us, nothing is more Important and Valuable than Examining our Karma.

There isn’t a lot of astrological Interaction between the 19 May Saturn-South Node Conjunction (Karma demanding Attention) and the 23 May Station of Orcus (Breaking Oaths), but in addition to their Temporal Proximity, the Topical Connections are many and Intense.  We’ll take the chart apart soon, but in the interim we’ll give you some homework.  Make a list of the places in your Life where you don’t Believe that you have Choice.  That’ll likely turn out to be critical.  And, Think about all of the Abuse Stories you’ve heard in your Life; which one had the most Emotional Impact on you?

“Dark Days” 2

April 19, 2019

Here’s an excellent way to Lighten Up these “Dark Days” – Donna Eden’s free Energy Medicine & Healing Summit that lasts all week, 22-26 April, led by her daughter Dondi Dahlin, at…

https://energymedicinesummit.com/

I’m told that each session will be available for 48 hours after it plays live.  I’m looking forward to…

  • Donna herself speaking about The Assemblage Point (“The Power of this extraordinary Energy and how to Align with it; How it works with the Aura and the Heart Chakra; How figure eights keep it shining bright”) and
  • Judith Orloff on Balance as an Empath (“Identify if you’re an Empath and/or highly Sensitive person; Discover why you feel exhausted, anxious, and physically ill; Learn how to Set Boundaries and Trust your Intuition),

…both Tuesday morning.  While I think of an Ego Death as a Shift in our “Assemblage Point,” I don’t really Know what Castaneda’s Don Juan meant by that term.  I expect Donna, Seeing Energy as she does, will Know though, so I’m Excited to hear what she has to say about it.

Here’s our “Dark Days” Itinerary…

17-24 April (more or less) – Strong Compulsions, best not Resisted, though they can be Modified if necessary to Avoid Untoward Consequences, or “Surfed” for a Gravity Boost to your Orbit.  If lack of Alignment with your Self-Image or Social Mask seems like a problem, Allow your Image or Mask to Evolve, Gently.  (Pluto Stationary in 24 Capricorn, 11:30 am 24 April)

19 April to 3 May – Soulful Full Moon (see previous and future posts)

21-28 April – Watch closely for any sign of Self-Doubt, and rather than giving it any Credence, regard it as a Regression into the most Self-Sabotaging parts of your Childhood Programming.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’ve been Programmed into Doubting yourself, haven’t you.”  If your Inner Child doesn’t Show Up for a Hug and maybe a Chat, Pretend that they have.  (Chariklo Station in 25 Capricorn, 3pm 28 April)

22-29 April – We need to Stay Focused on One Thing here, and it needs to be The Most Important Thing.  For you in this context (ie, everything else that’s going on), that may feel like Rescuing Your Partner or Someone Else who’s Important to you, or Saving Your Relationship or Your Income or Your Domicile or some other Materially or Emotionally Important issue.  Which is Fine, but do Recognize that you’ll be Abandoning your True Self if whoever you’re Rescuing, or whatever you’re Saving, is Contrary to your Liberation or to your Soul’s Truth.

No Worries, you may just be Learning the last few Lessons that you need to Learn in order to be Truly Ready to Transcend.  This isn’t our only Opportunity to Ascend, after all, just our Most Powerful One, one where we’re Jet-Propelled.  Before we’re Jet-Propelled into our Liberation, we’re likely to be Jet-Propelled into our “Shit,” so Awareness is key here.  We Want to stay Conscious of the Difference between What We Want and What We Don’t Want, and focus on the former as much as we can.  (Saturn Stationary in 21 Capricorn, 5pm PST 29 April)

23-30 April – Yes, it may well Feel Awful, because you may be Face to Face with your Held Emotions, the ones you’d rather Die than Feel.  There are literally No Greater Opportunities to Liberate yourself from your Limitations and your Self-Sabotage – from your Karma.  Remember the story of Sisiutl, a two-headed Monster so Scary that It turns to Stone whomever Sees It.  But, if you Stand Still for It as It approaches you, Its two heads will See Each Other – and Sisiutl will turn to Stone!  (Saturn Merges with True South Node, Exact at noon PDT 30 April)

Which leaves us with a Pattern that looks like this…

In other words, it’s pretty much All At Once.  We might Feel greater Compulsion early, and greater Focus later, or we might just feel Heavy, or like Shit, for the whole two weeks – the Pluto, Chariklo, Saturn, and Saturn-South Node events are also all within a few Degrees of one another, increasing the likelihood of Merger.  When the Energies Merge, our Unconscious Reaction will likely be something like The Most Important Thing is to Stop This Persistent Feeling that I’m Dying, Compulsively using Food, Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, or whatever Crutches we’re accustomed to using.

A Conscious Response might be The Most Important Thing is to Take Advantage of this Incredible Opportunity to Liberate myself from these Karmic Chains that have become so Graphically Clear.  So how might we go about that Liberation?  Lots of Tapping.  Lots of Alternating Theta and Tapping to Distinguish our Anxiety from Reality (see https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava/theta/).  Lots of Poor-Sweethearting.  There’s Grace in the Full Moon chart that will Help; we’ll talk more about that soon.

It’ll help to have Buddies who understand what we Want and what’s likely to Block us from it, so they can Remind us at strategic moments what’s The Most Important Thing.  We can score the Chocolate or the Tequila after we ditch them, but meanwhile they will have slowed down our Self-Destruction.

A friend once said, “I know that This Too will Change.  But you, as an astrologer, know When it will Change!”  No matter how Crummy you Feel, know that your Work will bring an Abundance of May Flowers, and it’s not far away.

Ancestors Full Moon 3 (Boundaries VII)

February 18, 2019

A reader asks…

“Now how to come upon that ego death, what is that – and what does that look like?  I know it’s in the ‘literature’; the fine print!  And am I reading between the lines, perhaps, that seem to be about moving up and beyond karmic entanglement?  …it feels so weighted now.”

Yes, I realized last night that I should say more about Ego Death, but I’d already written so much that I didn’t want to stretch it out more.  So I appreciate the Question.

And yes, Ego Death is “in the literature,” at https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/identity/ego-death/.  The essence is Noticing that you’re feeling like “I’d rather die than go through that again,” and a key to becoming Adept with this “ED” is to reframe the Experience from “I’d rather Die than…” to “I would rather die than…”  Making that a PIAVA would also be a boon.  There’s much more “in the literature,” for instance, when you get lost in your own ‘hood or can’t remember your own phone number, those are signs that you’re Newly Reborn.

Ego Death is a Psychological Molt that needs to occur whenever we feel Overwhelmed and Recognize that we have to Change something in order to Enjoy going on with our Life, but we also feel Trapped by our Commitments (or lack thereof if we’re Feeling Isolated) and don’t know what we even can Change.  Making our Ego Death a PIAVA Surrenders all that Change mishmash about What and Why and How and Who to our Intuition, which Knows well What needs to be Changed, and How to do it.

We might PIAVA an Ego Death with something like “I Wonder what I need to be Happy” or “Great Spirit, Please Make My Life Enjoyable (Again)” or Asking yourself “What Do I Really Want?” and then spending some time with the Feeling you would have in your Body if you had the Luxury of Allowing Yourself to Receive Exactly That.  And certainly “You Poor Sweetheart, you Feel at your Wit’s End, don’t you” or “… you feel Anxious, don’t you” would be a quick way to Change the wallpaper.  Of course you’d Change the Subject after each PIAVA.

Folks say that all this “New Agey” stuff is just another excuse for putting off the Action that we need to take, but I differ adamantly about that.  Taking Action from our Dynamic Planning-Doing mindset Changes nothing, as our Inner Male can only perpetuate His Limitations.  We have to Appeal to our Inner Female to Change anything.  She Knows what must be done, and She Knows how to Motivate your Inner Male to Enjoy getting to Work when it’s Time and when it’s Right.

The whole idea behind PIAVA is that, sometime after you Change the Subject, you Wake Up and Notice that You Are Doing What It Takes to Solve the Problem, without even Noticing that you’re Doing it, because once you Changed the Subject you Changed your Perspective, and now the World is running on a whole New engine and transmission, and the words you used to use to describe your Frustration (if you even remember them, which often you won’t) aren’t even Relevant anymore.

Your Inner Lady IS your Heart, She Knows What You Want Intimately, and She Knows How to Get It, because She Knows the World Intuitively.  Your “Head” (really we’re talking about the Third Chakra, not the Sixth, so “Head” is a misnomer – your Inner Male comes out of your Solar Plexus) only Knows What You Think, and you’re Thinking that What You Want is Unreachable, and since He only Knows the World Empirically, He can only Act to Keep On Doing What He’s Been Doing, which Aint Working, or you wouldn’t be in need of an Ego Death.

And yes, Karma has been Dead for a long time now, except for our own Grasping of it.  As for the Weight,

there’s probably an Ego Death in there, and probably a Held Emotion (aka Karmic PTSD).  The quickest way to find out is to make yourself Comfortable, Locate the Heaviness in your Body, Warm It, Soften around It (Fear is Hard and Cold, Love is Soft and Warm), put your Full Attention into the Center of It, and Hold It there until the Heaviness Moves. Then Change the Subject.

Of course it will help to Give your Inner Child Permission to Blubber unashamedly and uncontrollably, and to Complain to friends – but only those who will understand that your Intention is to Let Go rather than to Bitch (a la RC – see https://www.rc.org/) or to Accuse anyone of anything.

By the way, do you know how to Complain without putting the load right on your Listeners?  You speak in I statements rather than You or They Statements, and you use Feeling verbs rather than Thinking verbs (“Feel Like” is a Thinking verb – a Feeling verb is always followed by an Emotion word such as Angry or Excited or Bummed).  This way your Listeners can Enjoy your Story, and to the extent they’re able, Empathize, without having to Take Responsibility for your Process.  If you want to study how to do this, see https://www.cnvc.org/.

Boundaries III

February 11, 2019

A we mentioned in Boundaries, “Other, of course, isn’t just Other Hupers.”  We’ve been writing about Libra and Pallas for several days without realizing till now that Other and Boundary are really the same concept or word, just seen from different Perspectives.  Without a Boundary there wouldn’t be an Other, and without Other we’d never have the notion of Boundary.  It’s all about Identity, which is a lot more Fluid than we usually think.  And about Duality, which is a lot more Limiting than we usually think.

We Hupers usually think of the Veil between us and the Other Side as more of a Limitation than a Boundary, but Boundary it is, and the Other Side is as much an element of Libra as your paramour.

“He was not wakened again by Alder, but he had a bad dream of his own.

“He was standing by a wall of stone near the top of a long hillside of dry grey grass that ran down from dimness into the dark.  He knew he had been there before, had stood there before, but he did not know when, or what place it was.  Someone was standing on the other side of the wall, the downhill side, not far away.  He could not see the face, only that it was a tall man, cloaked.  He knew that he knew him.  The man spoke to him, using his true name.  He said, ‘You will soon be here, Ged.’

“Cold to the bone, he sat up, staring to see the space of the house about him, to draw its reality about him like a blanket.  He looked out the window at the stars.  The cold came into his heart then.  They were not the stars of summer, beloved, familiar, the Cart, the Falcon, the Dancers, the Heart of the Swan.  They were the Other stars, the small, still stars of the dry land, that never rise or set.  He had known their names once, when he knew the names of things.

” ‘Avert!’ he said aloud and made the gesture to turn away misfortune that he had learned when he was ten years old.”  (Ursula Le Guin, The Other Wind, pp.12-13)

“We who have true names keep them when we die, it’s our use-name that is forgotten… This is a mystery to the learned, I can tell you, but as well as we understand it, a true name is a word in the True Speech. … When my master Aihal died, my wife was there with him; and as he was dying he said to her, ‘It is changed, all changed.‘  He was looking across that wall.  From which side I do not know.”  (ibid, p.45)

“Kalessin said: ‘Long ago we chose.  We chose freedom.  Men chose the yoke.  We chose fire and the wind.  They chose water and the earth.  We chose the west,  and they chose the east.’

“And Kalessin said: ‘But always among us some envy them their wealth, and always among them some envy us our liberty.  So it was that evil came into us and will come into us again, until we choose again, and forever, to be free.  Soon I am going beyond the west to fly on the Other Wind.  I will lead you there, or wait for you, if you will come.’ …

“Then Kalessin said, ‘Once we were one people.  And in sign of that, in every generation of men, one or two are born who are dragons also.  And in every generation of our people, longer than the quick lives of men, one of us is born who is also human.  Of these one is now living in the Inner Isles.  And there is one of them living there now who is a dragon.  These two are the messengers, the bringers of choice.  There will be no more such born to us or to them.  For the balance changes.’ ”  (Ibid, pp.167-68)

We can also compare our day-to-day Experience with that of Daphne Charters and her friends (Forty Years with the Fairies, pp.260-61)…

“This work, in which we all assist, is known as a transformation.  We seek and find a lost soul whose astral body, as well as the physical, has died, leaving no trace to normal Astral eyes.  However, because we cannot see a ‘dead’ person, owing to his faster rate of vibration, it does not follow that he has no body.  So it is with those whose vibrations have sunk through the years until only the Great Ones know where they lie.

“We find these people by their vibration, however slow and, although we are unable to see them when we reach them, we mark the spot and direct rays of power and love upon them until their vibrations are sufficiently raised for the bodies to become visible to us.  This is the first stage in the rehabilitation of ‘lost souls,’ as much power has to be directed to them over sometimes long periods before consciousness returns.

“In order to achieve even the first part of the transformation, it is necessary for many hundreds of people from the Astral to gather together.  By passing power through their bodies, it becomes sufficiently coarsened to be effective amidst very slow vibrating matter.  This is where Daphne is of use to us, for her physical body vibrates slower than those of us who live on the Astral, a higher plane, thus power which is passed through her coarsens the whole.

“Unless you are clairvoyant, you will not have seen a display of power so you cannot know the magnitude of the volume, or the intensity of light.  Fairies can naturally see this power for it is their life’s work to distribute it, but normally they know only the quantity which they can collectively produce in their own group.  Our own fairies, who always help us, are ever amused at the never-ending supply so we were interested to see how the delegates would be affected…”

“How different is the power which we witnessed today to that which is known by the same name on Earth.  Man ever seeks for power to overcome his neighbors, to add to his possessions, or to acquire authority over more people.  Today we were privileged to see the essence from which all these petty misnomers have their being.

“But this true-power, in its purity of purpose, performed a deed so wondrous that if men were told of it, they would not believe.  If only those who sought to misuse it understood the condition in which they will find themselves when their ridiculous, puffed-up physical bodies and accompanying personalities are no more, perhaps they would then use it to lift up instead of to crush, to comfort rather than exploit, and, in the happiness which they would at last know, they would find the key to a better world.”

So, I was Wondering about the Other planet in Libra, Makemake.  And it turns out that, at least for now, the Bottom Line of Makemake in Libra is that If we Want to Manifest What We Want, we have to Seek Out and Revert our Victim Postures.  Drawing up the Makemake chart for the moment when Juno enters Gemini – ie, when we are likely to be due for substantial Consciousness Expansion (8:30 pm PST 10 February)…

…Reveals two big Challenges (T-Squares)…

A Challenge to Manifestation itself (Makemake) between Making it a Value of ours to be Fully Responsive to our Survival Instincts (Venus-Pholus-Quaoar) and Choosing Consciousness over Fate (asteroid Moira).

Fate is what happens To Us when we’re not Conscious of what’s going on.  It’s not about Why but rather about What.  What’s the Pattern?  When our Repeating Bummers happen, what Precedes them?  When “bad luck” befalls us, there’s a sequence of events that leads up to it.  We aren’t talking Cause & Effect – that’s a left-brain dead end.  Useful if you’re Stuck in the 3D Dynamic Masculine Creative process, but Obfuscating if you want to use 5D Magnetic Feminine Manifestation methods.

PIAVA that you become aware of What Precedes your Self-Sabotage.  If you already knew what it was you’d have fixed it long ago.  It’s behind your Blinders, and you won’t see it without enlisting the Cooperation of the Unconscious – that is, using PIAVA.  For instance, “Lord Ganesh, Please Remove All Obstacles to my Realizing How I Stumble into Self-Sabotage.”  Once you get Conscious about these Patterns, you can Choose otherwise.  https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava-review/.

We’ve been working with Responding Fully (Pholus) to our Survival Instincts (Quaoar) – ie, Disallowing our Yes-Buts that try to Protect our Routines – for a long time.  We’re running out of Excuses.  It’s past time to Accept this as a basic Value.

The second Challenge is about Reframing the Beliefs Created by our Victim Postures (Vesta-OR10-Nessus) between Ego Death (Nemesis) and Sustainability (Ceres).

Like our Survival Instincts, we’ve also been working with our Abuse Memories for a long time now.  First we have to Retrieve them – or Allow them to Retrieve us (OR10), and Acknowledge their Reality.  Then we have to Empathize with our Real Victim, Revert any Blaming-the-Victim behavior we indulged or encountered, and Deal with our Real Emotions.  That usually takes a lot more than a few hundred Poor-Sweethearts, though they can be useful.  https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/poor-sweetheart/.

People talk a lot about Forgiveness, but in a real sense what we need is the Opposite of Forgiveness, as our original Tolerance was a form of Forgiveness to begin with.  We don’t Forgive; we Discover that we’ve Forgiven.  It’s an Observation, not an Action.  As with Self-Sabotage, we need to Discover what Preceded our episodes of Abuse, so we can Learn to Recognize the Pattern before it turns Abusive, and Choose Otherwise.  While Sharing all this increases the Pain, it’s often very difficult to do alone.

Yes, just about every step in the process of Clearing Abuse – Recall, Acceptance, Self-Empathy, Embracing our Real, Explosive Emotions, Opening to the Patterns – requires an Ego Death (Nemesis).  Our Resistance to Ego Death must be Reframed, so we Recognize when it’s happening and Learn to Celebrate it as the fastest route to Living a Better Life.

And as we move through Abuse, we have to Recognize that we’re likely to be Abused in some ways every day.  Every “trivial” unkind remark, Intentional or otherwise, can make us Feel Less-Than.  So we have to get very good at Recognizing it, Owning and Healing our Reactions, and approaching Ego Death as we would a Latte, in order to make this whole process Sustainable (Ceres).

And Sustainability-Ceres is the kingpin of the whole chart, as it is the head of a Kite that connects the two T-Squares.  A Kite is a Grand Trine (three planets equally spaced around the Circle) with a fourth planet halfway between two of the three.  The fourth planet – Ceres – becomes the Focus of the substantial Dumb-Luck Blessings served up by the Grand Trine.

So we have a Golden Opportunity to bring these Challenges – Cleaning Up our Manifestations by Choosing to Support our Survival Instincts, and Rooting Out the Limiting Beliefs that our Abuse History has left us with – into Resolution, where they Serve our Deepest Desires rather than Sabotaging them.

The three corners of the Grand Trine, or Big Grace, are Manifestation (Makemake), Ego Death (Nemesis), and The End of Karma (asteroids Atropos and Karma).  We’ve actually been working on the Death of Karma for a lot longer than we’ve been working on Abuse Memories or Responding to Survival Instincts.  The Realization in the Western World that Karma is about Inertia rather than Retribution has been with us since Alan Watts’s books in the 1950s.

A corollary is that Karma does not Grasp us, we Grasp it.  Like our Other Challenges, Letting Go of Our Karma involves Noticing when it’s recurring, Reverting our Belief that it’s Inevitable, Discovering the Patterns that led up to it, Noticing when those Patterns Begin the next time, and Choosing an Alternative.  The Death of Karma is a Given in this Drama; it’s not something we’re being Scheduled to work on, it’s something that we can use as a model for the Abuse and Survival Issues we are working on.

Dragon, of course, is a synonym for Karma, and as we saw, Dragons have gone to fly on the Other Wind.

Kegels 3

February 1, 2019

The other elements of Big Grace in the Juno-Sedna chart, and the upcoming Sedna Station chart, are two Diamond Stars.

A T-Square (drawn as a red triangle) is made up of two planets Opposite one another, with a third at their Midpoint (ie, three Signs from each).  It means a Challenge.  The ultimate aim is to become Adept at this Challenge, but it’s via the School of Hard Knocks.  If we haven’t Figured Out what we’re supposed to be Learning, we usually Experience a T-Square as Long-Suffering Frustration.

I mean, how would we know, if we didn’t have our chart drawn up?  And even then, an Ego astrologer would concur that we were screwed.  We’d just think it was horrible Karma!

That’s what I thought about my own T-Squares until I Realized that the Fourth Harmonic (a Square goes one Fourth of the way around the Zodiac) is about Dominion – Healthy Control, Mastery!  (Or, without the possible hidden implication of Slavery as the inverse of Mastery, Adeptness.)  Dominion is the Fourth Principle in the Tarot’s Major Arcana.

A natal T-Square is a Life-Long graduate seminar, where there are no real Answers, only better Questions, better because they lead to a fuller understanding of the Depth and Breadth of the Issue that the T-Square presents.  So when we Reframe it thus, each Bummer in our Life-Long series of Bummers, has taught us a new Principle, Subtlety, Corollary, Insight, or Breakthrough about the subject of our seminar.

Each time we thought we were going to get it “Right” this time!  We thought we could make External Reality match our Perfect Pictures.  And every time we Failed.  But each time we Learned more about it.  Each time we got a little closer to What We Want, though many times we’ve taken wide Detours into places we didn’t know were Related until we went there.  Truth is, we’ll never Achieve our Perfect Pictures, because Perfect Pictures are 2D Snapshots, while Real Life is a Hologram in an Infinite number of Dimensions.

Achieving our Perfect Pictures would be like trying to Grok the nature of a Butterfly by pinning it to a board.  The hardest thing about a T-Square is that we can’t give it up.  Dropping the class is not an Option, because What We Want is an Irrevocable Compulsion.  It’s What We’re Here For.  We often settle for an Addiction – we get so Frustrated by our Lack of Success, which we take as a Personal Failure, that we divert ourself with the small but Satisfying Pleasure that we can get from Sugar, Alcohol, MJ, Sex, or worse.  It’s Temporary, but by the time we Indulge, we forget our Frustration.

Let’s take an Example.  For instance, suppose we hypothesize someone who has a Life-Long Challenge (T-Square) to Figure Out how to set up Effective Boundaries (Haumea-Pallas-Aletheia) between their Soul (Uranus) and their Ego so they can Approach their LifeTime Mission (North Node).  Oh, gosh, that’s one of the T-Squares in the Juno-Sedna chart, isn’t it.  What a coincidence…

The North Node is symbolized by those earphones in the lower right.  The red triangle that points to the earphones is the T-Square.  Well, we know already that our Mission is like Differential Equations or Calculus – we never really get there, we just keep cutting the distance in half between us and it…

If What We Want is Water and it’s always just out of Reach, that’s the Picture of Frustration.  We need to Reframe it – we may never get any Water in this Lifetime, but we’re sure going to Learn everything there is to Learn about Striving for it.  And probably, literally, Die trying.  Which is Cool – we was gonna Die anyway, so why not Die for a Cause.  And there aren’t any Causes more important to us than What We Want.

So, this particular “Challenge to Figure Out how to set up Effective Boundaries between our Soul and our Ego so we can Approach our LifeTime Mission” isn’t Life-Long, it’s only temporary.  We’re using the Mean Nodes, and they move about a Degree-and-a-half per month, so this Uranus-Haumea-North Node T-Square will only be with us for a few months.  But meanwhile, here in the context of wresting Power out of Fear (Sedna Stationary), finding a Boundary  between Soul and Rebirth that Serves our Mission is a Challenge that Confronts us.

For instance, the best Boundary here between Soul and Mission might be no Boundary, and Surrendering our Sovereignty to that Degree might Scare the Living Daylights out of our Ego, not to mention how it could Frighten our Dependents, as we might be Compelled to Abandon them for some abstruse Project like Saving Antarctica for the Penguins.  Or it could Drive us to Drink.  Here’s how some folks might do these Boundary Games…

“Full of anticipation, we set off and when we had adjusted our consciousness to the high vibration, we found ourselves in the Fairy sector.  However serious the reason for our visit may be, first we must play.  This is a necessity and not a frivolity because, until we have rushed about as fast as we can, there remain clinging to us, Earth ideas, and until we are rid of them, we are unable to concentrate.  What fun this period is.

“We burst and reform only to disintegrate again almost immediately.  In this destruction, the atoms of our bodies change their positions and one of our amusements is to stop them from rejoining those of the person to whom they rightfully belong.  Of course we can never prevent them from doing this for long, but sometimes we keep them poised between the two of us, they look so funny that we begin laughing, our concentration vanishes until we are once more complete and ready to burst again.”

–Normus, “Travels,” in Daphne Charters, Forty Years with the Fairies, p.209.

So, that’s a T-Square.  But weren’t we supposed to be talking about Diamond Stars?  Oh, ok, I remember now.

See the two green lines rising from the North Node?  That’s called a Finger of God, and it means Pay Attention to this!!  Some folks also call it a “Yod.”  In these charts, red lines represent Challenge, green Curiosity, and blue Grace.  Notice that when we connect the Yod to the T-Square, a web of blue lines is created on the other side of the central Opposition – literally, a Bowl of Grace.

This is a Diamond Star, and it means that the T-Square is a Self-Resolving Challenge because of the Grace in the blue lines, which make a double Trine Bridge, or two Easy Alternative Paths, across the T-Square.  Like an escalator up the side of the Cliff we Expected to have to climb.  So our two escalators in this Diamond Star are Suspending Disbelief or Allowing our Beliefs to Shift (Klotho-Vesta), and Trusting our Forbidden Genius (Eurydike-Ixion), which will require a Shift in our Values (Venus).

If we are to Trust the Genius of our True Self, we’re probably going to have to Give Up some Obedience to the Values of our former Masters or Programmers.  Recognizing that they were Doing the Best They Knew How at the Time, we just know that this is the time when we have to substitute Self-Trust for the relative Security of their Truth.

This is a Diamond Square, so this just happens, it’s not something we have to work hard at, though we may have to work a bit at Surrendering our Resistance to it – at least enough to enable us to Notice the Difference.  After all, the overall Work this week is Growth of Consciousness – Juno-Sedna.

So the Bottom Line of this Diamond Star is that both our Beliefs and our Values will Shift, or have already Shifted.  Have you Noticed any of that in your own Experience yet?  This is a big Change in our Identity, since Values and Beliefs are the Foundations of Who We Are.  And an Effortless Shift.  We haven’t mentioned Nemesis or Ego Death once, and they aren’t involved.

Well, not in an obvious way anyway.  Nemesis is Octile (Adjustment) to Mars (Action) and Trioctile (Rebalancing) to Pluto (the Underlying Energy).  Without the Diamond Star that would be enough to create some Ego Death, and at any rate no Change of Identity takes place without some Ego Death.  Death doesn’t have to be Unpleasant, however, if we Take Ourselves Lightly, like the Angels do.  That Mars-Pluto Square is about An Angel with a Harp, recall.

If you’ve Noticed your Beliefs, Values, Identity Shifting in the last several days, have you Noticed any signs of Ego Death? Getting Lost in a familiar place, for instance, where it feels like part of you knows exactly where you are, but another part is Experiencing it as Brand New.  That’s an important kind of Shift to Notice as we Grow our Consciousness.

The second Diamond Star (notice the double green lines emanating from the point of the T-Square) is focused on the Stellium in Libra – Haumea-Aletheia-Pallas, or Rebirth of True Boundaries.  If our Boundaries are Out of Balance with our Soul or our Goals or our Mission, we won’t know Who to Trust, or what to eat for breakfast, or when to Meditate and when to Act.  So this is a Big Deal.

The roots of this Yod are Chiron (Despair/Miracles) and Juno-Sedna itself (Bringing our Fears into Consciousness).  As we’ve said, when our Fears are Unconscious, they Control our Life.  In order to Overcome them (or rather, Love them into becoming the Power that they really are) we need first to Bring them into Consciousness.  Despair is totally appropriate when our Unconscious Fears rule our Lives, because we’re Powerless against them.

But fortunately, Chironean Despair is easy to fix – alls we gotta do is Poor-Sweetheart ourself.  We say to ourself, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Overwhelmed, aren’t you.”  That statement Shifts our Identity from Despair to Compassion.  If we don’t Change the Subject afterwards though, we may get sucked back into Despair (though we could always Poor-Sweetheart ourself again).

Once we slip out of our stiff, scratchy Despair shirt and pull on our soft, warm Compassion hoodie, we can Change the Subject – do something else entirely, and divert our Attention.  That will allow the Overwhelming Challenges that Triggered our Despair to Resolve themselves on their own, without the Interference of our Anxiety.  After all, We are now Compassion, not Worry.

All Prayers are Answered, and a “You Poor Sweetheart…” is a Prayer of sorts, a Surrendering of the Overwhelm to your Higher Power.  It’s also a Loving Moment like Gary Craig talks about in his Unseen Therapist process (https://www.emofree.com/), which is a very Powerful Healing technique to Learn.  It’s also Easy to Learn if you’ve been PIAVAing for a while (https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava-review/).

We don’t talk about them often, but the seven short green lines are also important, and you can take advantage of them in any chart you find them in.  They’re called “Unxes” because an “Unx” is one twelfth of something.  The Twelfth Harmonic is about Pattern-Breaking.  That’s one of the most Powerful Skills we can develop.  After all, Karma is just Patterns, so if we can Break those Patterns, we’re Golden.

In fact, the South Node (Karma itself!) has two Unxes, one to Trusting our Forbidden Genius (Aletheia-Ixion-Venus), and the other to Suspending Disbelief (Klotho-Vesta).  The implication is that these two Intentional Acts will shake a good deal of our Karma and Self-Sabotage Loose.  We won’t turn that down.

The other Unxes and Opportunities for some relatively Easy Pattern-Breaking are…

  • Suspending Disbelief to Despair/Miracles (Chiron).  An excellent Example of that – when you encounter what feels like a familiar Bummer about to repeat, Suspend your Belief that it’s Inevitable.  It AintJust don’t Grab it.  Just slip out the back, Jack; just get off the bus, Gus – there must be fifty ways to Leave your Karma.  And don’t for a moment think that your Kinship with your Karma isn’t a Love Relationship – how long have the two of you been Joined at the Hip after all?
  • Despair/Miracles to your Soul (Uranus).  What keeps you from Uniting your Soul and your Ego?  You don’t even need to know it, you can just say to yourself, “You Poor Sweetheart, You aren’t Identifying with your Soul as much as you could be, are you.”  Then just Change the Subject and Enjoy!
  • Soul to Consciousness of Fear (Juno-Sedna).  I mean, what would your Soul have to Fear, anyway?  Certainly not Annihilation, it’s Immortal by definition.  Abandonment might Sadden Her, but even that’s Doubtful, as She surely knows that Getting Lost is the first stage of Getting Found.  We may have already Resolved all of our Sedna Station Issues with that last Poor Sweetheart.  Wouldn’t that be great!
  • Consciousness of Fear to Unlimited Potential (dwarf planet Chaos).  Of course we’ve already Kegeled our Fear into Power, but even then, Unlimited is pretty Scary.  Reminds us of when we used to Imagine walking off the Edge of the Flat Earth, or those Nightmares we used to have about the Grand Canyon.  Better to PIAVA our Unlimited Potential.  How else will we shake it free from our existing Limiting Beliefs?
  • Unlimited Potential to our Mission (North Node).  How does that Feel – Exciting?  If it doesn’t, Breathe.  Better?  You should be Feeling a Surge of Energy up your Spine.  We may even be Wondering, what the Hell is my Mission, anyway?  If so, great – Wonder is a hidden PIAVA (don’t try to Figure It Out though – that will Limit it).  You could make it PIVAWA if you want, or even WIPAVA.

It’s really pretty Simple math – Fear Plus Breathing Equals Excitement, Fear Plus Kegels Equals Power.  We’ll probably get lots of Opportunities to practice both over the next week.

Kegels 1

January 30, 2019

One of these days I’ll learn better.  Here again I thought we were getting a few quiet days, when Lo, another Biggie.  As Frank or Earnest (I never knew which was which), “I just get my budget in order, and along comes a big Surprise, like rent, or a weekend!”  So, on 8 February, Sedna (Converting Fear into Power) is Stationary (Strong), but gosh, that’s nine days away.  Not that nine days isn’t too long for a buildup to a Station, especially if it’s a Big Station, or we’re more Sensitive than the average Bear – or if there isn’t much else going on.

Buuut, I just Noticed that asteroid Juno (the Edges of Consciousness) crosses Sedna this morning (30 January, 9:30 am PST), so that’ll be giving us an early preview of the Sedna Station.  This should be a good test of our Misogyny – the crossing, and the Station, occur within a few arcminutes of Algol, the Star most associated with Catastrophe – Catastrophe from the Male Perspective, as to them it symbolizes Female Rage – Algol is the eye in Medusa’s severed head.  From the Female Perspective, it’s a whole different Story.  I mean, gee, what do women have to Rage about, anyway?

If you haven’t noticed any Disturbances in a Force near you, you may want to look more closely at the Gender Dynamics – you might be overlooking something.  And if you’re really Brave, you might want to bring up the subject with members of the Other Gender.  “Is there anything you’d like to talk about, Dear?  How do you think we’re doing on the Male-Female Equality thing?  Anything we could Improve upon?”  If there’s anything a Juno Angle begs for, it’s Expansion of Consciousness.

This isn’t the Initiation of a new Cycle; that was last mid-September, at 28 Taurus, “A woman, past her ‘change of life,’ experiences a new love.”  As if Love was reserved for Youth, or defined by Hormones alone.  This is what we call a “Confidence-Builder,” the third and last Conjunction in a series.  So we’ve already had practice with this Energy, in the first half of September and November last year, and now it’s time to Integrate what we’ve Learned.  A reminder in case you’ve forgotten – Kavanaugh’s Confirmation Hearing spanned 4 September to 6 October.

The chart of this third Juno-Sedna crossing is pretty busy…

The main feature of the Juno-Sedna Conjunction itself, though not the main feature of the whole chart, is our Challenge (Square, or red line) to Receive a New Timeline (Klotho) that will turn our Beliefs (Vesta) upside down and inside out…

You live on Earth as a human being, not as a transcendent, Angelic being or a mythical Sidhe.  However, you can unite your humanity with the Angelic and Sidhe part within you in a rooted and yet heavenly way.  This is your potential, no matter what kind of human you are. 

“How you do this is for you to discover as your journey to revelations opens to the adventure called reality.  The Angel and Sidhe in you speak to your inner core about the most gentle and magical power you are destined to be.  Unfold your wings and walk Mother Earth with tenderness and creativity so heaven can land in the world of manifested creation.” 

— Søren Hauge, The Wild Alliance: Awakening Your Inner Angel & Sidhe, p.7.

The most Exciting (Excitement Less Breathing Equals Fear) feature of the chart as a whole is the Challenge (T-Square, the red triangle pointing left) to see All Apparent Setbacks as the Opportunities that they really are (Chiron = Despair and Miracles).  One of the most important parts of 5D Manifestation is Trust (Eurydike).  We are actually already Manifesting in 5D, but we don’t Trust it.  Whenever our Plans and Expectations and other Intellectualizations about Mechanisms lead us away from our Intentions, Intuitions, and Visualizations about Results, our 5D Guides are likely to spill our paint pot or poke a hole in a tire.

When we see these Gifts as setbacks and Gremlins, and Persist with our preference for Method over Result, we revert to 3D.  If instead we, chuckling, Appreciate the Interruptions as Guidance, then we can lean back, close our eyes, Meditate on What We Want rather than How We’re Planning to Get It, and rejoin the Collaborative Co-Creation that we really Want.  Why struggle against the Unseen Energies when we can Cooperate with them.  We have seen the Enemy, and it ain’t them.

Their Objective is to follow our Lead, but they’re mapping out the Effortless path to Manifesting What We Want, not the Tiresome path of How we Planned to Claim it as Our Own Creation.  The Unseen Energies are taking their cues from our Soul, not from our Ego, and that’s an incredible Gift to us if we’re Open to Looking for it.

Did you notice that this is a Gender-Balance problem?  The intellectual Focus on Method is the Dynamic Male process of Creating; the PIAVAed (see https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava-review/) Focus on Desired Results is the Magnetic Female way of Manifesting.

Regardless of our external Gender, our Inner Female (Heart, Intuition) knows Where We’re Going and What We Want.  Our Inner Male (Intellect, Engineering) might know How To Get There or How to Get It, but he isn’t hip to Where or What or Why.  They need to Partner Up if we’re going to get to 5D.

The Deeper part of this Challenge/T-Square is the Gateway to our Forbidden Genius and our Unlimited Potential (dwarf planets Ixion and Chaos, in the Opposition at the base of the T-Square).  Both of these lie far beyond our Expectations and Understandings, and will Deliver Rewards that are as Exceedingly Surprising and Delightful.  This Gate is Open in this chart (ie, at this time), and the Treasures that lie beyond the Gate are Glorious.  All we have to do to Open to them, is to see Interruptions as Gifts, as hints that we were veering off course.

The big red square is a Grand Cross – four planets more or less equally spaced around the Zodiacal Loop.  It’s actually more Impactful than the T-Square we’ve been talking about, but the T-Square will give us more hassles, so we’ll probably Notice it sooner.  Not only is a Grand Cross a Big Deal (because it spans the entire chart), but this one includes the Nodal Axis, meaning that it’s all about our Journey from Karma to Grace, making it Foundational.

Bringing our Fear up into Consciousness where we can Breathe it into Excitement or Kegel it into Power, is an Easy Path (Trine Bridge, the blue lines) across the Chasm between our Karma (South Node, upper left) and our Mission (North node, lower right).  Our Helpers in Disguise (remember now, Disruptions are Gifts informing us that we’re getting off course) are our own Soul (Uranus, lower left), and our Rebirth (Haumea-Aletheia-Pallas, upper right).

Allowing the Rebirth (Haumea) of our Boundaries (Pallas) between Truth (Aletheia) and Fiction, aka Suspending Disbelief, is a big part of Reframing our Setbacks and Surrendering our Ego into Service to our Soul.  Uranus is on its way back into Taurus (Solid Materiality), after spending seven years in Aries (Creative Spirit).

♥ There is also much Grace in the chart (Grand Trines and Kites, Diamond Stars), but we’ll talk about that in Kegels 2.

Self-Judgment and Self-Love VI

January 20, 2019

Did we emphasize enough how we might Respond to encountering any Impediments to our Self-Love?  The Easiest would probably be Poor-Sweethearting.  All you have to do is say to yourself, silently or not, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Guilty, aren’t you.” for, e.g., Guilt.  You could plug in any other Self-Judgment, or a different verb, such as “Discouraged,” or even “you’d rather Die, wouldn’t you.”

But before we Poor-Sweetheart ourself, we may want to get Conscious of how we’re Identifying ourself.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’d rather Die, wouldn’t you” might be exactly what you need if you’re Identifying with Extricating yourself from a situation that has no other exits.  But we can make an intermediate step – Identifying with what we’re Feeling.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Hopelessness, aren’t you” Identifies that you’re dealing with an Emotion rather than hardcopy 3D Reality.

Emotions can be Crippling, we know that, but they aren’t the Whole Story.  There are always other Perspectives.  Just Acknowledging that we’re dealing with an Emotion, rather than a Complete Reality, Expands our Awareness because we can’t help but Realize now that there are other things in the Universe besides Emotion.  For many of us, our Emotions are our Bottom Line, but they aren’t Everything.  So doing your Poor-Sweetheart once again with Feeling is useful, but it’s not the real point of Poor-Sweethearting.

When you talk to yourself and address yourself as “You,” you Step Out of your former Identity.  When you talk to yourself Compassionately, you’re no longer Identifying with the Bummer you want to Leave Behind, you’re now Identifying with Compassion – you’re actually stepping into Self-Love.  As long as you aren’t saying it Sarcastically, by adding the Poor you also take a step toward Empathy.

Our Self-Talk and our Thoughts Reveal where our actual Identity sits in any given moment.  Becoming Aware that we’re Talking to Ourself and that we’re Thinking, is a major Expansion of Consciousness, especially if we can make it a Habit.  When we shift from “I’d rather Die” to “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Despair, aren’t you,” our Identity shifts first from Despair itself, to our Emotions.  We Create Miracles by taking the next step – we Change the Subject.

We’ve Poor-Sweethearted ourself, now we need to Step Aside so it can do its work.  If we continue to focus on Despair or Emotion after we’ve Poor-Sweethearted ourself, we aren’t using the Power inherent in it.  Think of a Bummer, even a tiny one, for a minute.  Then Poor-Sweetheart yourself about it, then look to see if your Mood or Vibration has shifted.  I always feel much Lighter afterward, and I suspect you will too.

Once we move our Attention away, the Magic can happen.  If we’re still thinking about the Bummer, nothing has Changed, and we may need to try another strategy, like Tapping.  Toggling back and forth from Poor-Sweethearting to Tapping, and back again, as many times as you need to, could be very Powerful.  Our Habitual Thoughts are Cages that stop us from entering the Dangerous (to the Ego) world of Growth.  Only by Changing the Subject can we allow the bars to re-form to Enclose a larger space.

A technical note: Feeling Like does not introduce an Emotion, it introduces a Thought.  The word Feeling must be followed by a word that indicates an Emotion, before you’re really dealing with Emotion.  If you’re Feeling Like Shit, you’re still in your Thoughts.  You’re Referring to neither your Emotions nor your Physical Body, but your Judgments about one or the other, or both.  Judgments are Thoughts.  Differentiating your Emotions from your Thoughts is a very Powerful Growth in Consciousness all by itself.

The chart of today’s (20 January 9:15 pm PST) 1 Leo Total Lunar Eclipse Vitality Full Moon, apart from the Grand Octile, is busy…

But if you look at the big blue triangle (Grand Trine, aka Dumb-Luck Blessings), you’ll notice that Chiron (it looks like a key) and Ceres (like an upside-down cuphook) are two of the three corners – Moon-Varuna-North Node (Instincts-Life Force-Mission) is the third.  Plus, by adding Sun-South Node-Karma-Atropos-Mercury (Essence-Held Emotions-Bad Habits-Endings-Awareness; it’s a story problem – make a sentence including all five of these concepts) we make a Kite (Directed Dumb-Luck Blessings).

So whatever else is going on here at the Sappho-Station Total-Lunar-Eclipse Vitality Full Moon, the route to making it all Effortless lies through Chiron (Despair, Miracles, Poor-Sweethearting) and Ceres (Sustainability) – making it a Lifetime Habit to Poor-Sweetheart yourself at the first sign of distress.  You aren’t Avoiding anything by Poor-Sweethearting it; you’re Stepping Out of the Way so your Heart (aka your Inner Female) can Love it to death without interference from the Limitations of your Present-Moment Ego.

Dr. Kim is on track with the Year of Self-Love as well – if like me you’re irritated by the constant movement of the camera, you may want to click to a blank tab so you can Listen without the distraction…

I wonder if it’d be easier to watch if I said to myself, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Irritiated, aren’t you.”  Let me give it a try…  Yup, complete transformation!

Self-Judgment and Self-Love II

January 15, 2019

Of course the “good news” of a Nemesis Station Square Nessus-OR10 (Ego Death from Embracing or Poor-Sweethearting our Intrusive Abuse Memories), is that it’s an Opportunity to Clear the very Held Emotions that constitute our Unconscious Resistance to migrating into 5D, aka What We Want.  It’s not as complicated as it sounds.  Originally, we set Boundaries against Memories that would Trigger Emotions that would Overwhelm us.

As we got good at this through Repetition, we pushed the Memories and their Emotions out of our Awareness and into Karma.  We made them Unconscious, which means they’re part of Not-Me.  In Real Life we’re Infinite Light Beings Fantasizing a Material Vehicle, and from this Light-Being Perspective nothing is Not-Me.  But when we Identify with our Fantasy Material (/Emotional/Intellectual) Vehicle, then from that Perspective our Not-Me can get Overwhelmingly large, large enough to Take Control of our Vehicle behind its back, without telling us, so to speak – Out of Our Awareness.

This is the Origin of all the Good-Versus-Evil stories you’ve been taught since Birth; “Good” is your Fantasy-Vehicle Identity, and “Bad” is the Not-Me which is the rest of your Light Being, which you don’t recognize as “Me.”  Hence the Classic Warfare Model of HisStory.  His many Stories become Religions or other Group-Thinks like Make-Rome-Great-Again aka Bring-Back-the-Slaves, which the pathologically clever among us exploit for their own Gain.

Moving into Identifying with our Light Body is not a process of Struggle, but a process of Surrender or Allowing or Vulnerability – HerStory.  The Lady Warrior Archetype misses the point, but it’s an intermediate step that might help with our Liberation, if we don’t get Stuck in it.

As we attempt to return our Identity to our Infinite Light Beingness, we find that our Fantasy-Vehicle Identity has to Break Out of a series of Shells, each one Opening us to a “new” (Revealed – Eris) segment of our Not-Me, which Manifests as an Introduction to a Held Emotion (South Node or Karma).  With each Broken Shell our Me Grows toward our 5D Light Being, and our Me Grows in Power – in the sense that we now have greater Healthy Control over our Life Circumstances.

Not the Power-Over which dominates HisStory, but the Power-With that works through Collaboration with the Unseen.  The more we can Delegate Power to the Unseen Energies that actually Carry it, the Easier our Life becomes.  Except of course for the potentially unpleasant “Ego Deaths,” or Molts, or Rebirths, or Embracing/Poor-Sweethearting of our Held Emotions, that occur when one of those Shells Break, because we Experienced those Shells as Security to our Fantasy Vehicle.  Like when Nemesis Acts Out, such as Now through 17 January.

Not to Lament, as Sappho (Self-Love) is also Stationary here, through 20 January.  Unconditional Self-Love is so Central to our Light-Being Self that we’re hardly Aware of it.  While Nemesis can suck out the Air that our Fantasy Vehicle likes to Breathe, nothing can suck out the Light that our Light-Being Self Breathes, though the Illusions of our Fantasy Vehicle like to blind us to that in its misguided attempts to Protect the next Shell.

When we can Experience the Breaking of a Shell as Liberation of a more Power-With-ful Me instead of the demise of a more Limited Power-Over-ful Me, our Growth into Full Collaboration with the Universe has Arrived.  Contrary to the usual Metaphor, there are no Destinations here; there are only More Shells to Break.  5D is not an event, it’s a process, and it’s the process of Enjoying Ego Death.

So let’s have a look at this Opportunity to Experience some serious Ego Deaths in the context of serious Self-Love…

For instance, there’s Marilyn Raffaele’s Channeling for 13 January…

http://www.onenessofall.com/newest.html

(If you don’t find the 13 January 2019 message there, check http://www.onenessofall.com/archives.html.)

“We are the Arcturian Group, a collective of ascended Arcturian beings from the eighth dimension here to assist Gaia and her people during these times of ascending consciousness.

“Know that these messages as well as others that may resonate with you are in reality your own state of consciousness manifesting as the particular message.  If this were not true, you would not be drawn to or be able to understand them.

“You, who are spiritually prepared to expand beyond the illusion and integrate truth are the forefront of the ascension process.  You chose to be on earth during these times of intense energetic chaos and change in order to complete your own third dimensional spiritual journey and become the first wave of ascension and example for those following.

“You are preparing the way for those of the second wave–individuals spiritually ready to awaken but who until now have resisted doing so.  Know that the Light of so many now awakening out of three dimensional sleep state, is shifting and dissolving the old paradigm, even when things appear to be getting worse.  Try not to give up hope but rather stand back as an observer for you are soon going to see much that will restore the hope you may have lost.

“You serve as living breathing examples of unconditional love for those around you when you realize and begin to live out from a consciousness that knows unconditional love is the only reality and that anything else simply represents conditioned beliefs about love.”

“Unconditional love can only ever be all there is because there is only ONE–one substance, one life, one reality, one law.  Love is the energetic glue connecting everything within this Infinite ONE and those who [naively] continue to believe in and live out from a consciousness of separation and duality create for themselves the illusory forms of these beliefs.

“You can ignore, but never change the reality of Oneness by judging from outer appearances as proof of its nonexistence.  Continuing to hold to the third dimensional belief system after outgrowing it only delays a person’s spiritual evolution because Oneness is the foundation of all reality and must be acknowledged at some point.  For some it may be in a future life, for you it is now.

“There are some who present a very religious face to the public, preaching ideas of love, but who do not practice them when confronted with experiences or opportunities that may result in personal inconvenience or lifestyle discomfort.  Unconditional love cannot continue being flowery words spoken or written, but must become an attained state of consciousness.

“Because Love/oneness is the only reality, all false concepts about love must be allowed to fade away and be replaced by a deeper realization of what love really is.  The third dimensional belief system has created and promoted hundreds of concepts of love, the grandest of them being romantic love.

“Romantic love is based in the belief that everyone is half of a couple.  This concept would be true if humans were simply physical, but they are not and never have been.  Although appearing to be just physical, the reality is that everyone is a whole and complete expression of Divine consciousness having the experience of being in physical form.

“Many, even the very evolved are reluctant to move past their favorite three dimensional concepts of love but as long as an individual continues to seek wholeness, happiness, and fulfillment from another, they remain just that– half of a couple.”

“Let go of concepts proclaiming that things need, should, or must be a certain way in order to be correct.  Most of the world’s ‘shoulds and shouldn’ts’ have been carried in collective consciousness from earlier times when they may have actually made sense for personal safety.  Others are nothing more than rules and regulations given by third dimensional thinkers, governments, and religious leaders often to promote their own agendas.

“You are ready to come out from under the bondage of three dimensional thinking because you have evolved beyond the need for someone to tell you what is right and what is wrong–you already know what is right and wrong.

“Allow yourselves to be who and what you are.  If family or friends think you have become a ‘weirdo’, simply laugh, bless them, and move on.  Does God need outer validation?  Where could it come from since IT is all there is?  …

“For some it takes a great deal of courage to live truth when it begins to unfold from within.  A person may be afraid to speak of these things to those of his old mindset be they family, friends, or church elders.  Living truth is not for the faint hearted especially in the beginning, but continuing to align with some organization or individual out of fear of criticism serves only to keep the person in energy he has outgrown and where he will continue to create experiences reflective of that energy.

“The choice is yours, dear ones.  Do you choose to be what you already are or do you wish to continue with the illusion of being a poor human constantly suffering third dimensional problems and continually seeking a savior, human or Divine, to save you?.

“Stop waiting for someone or something to change the world for you.  Only the awakened consciousness of the collective can and is shifting the three dimensional world out of illusion.

“Allow the real YOU to create your experiences.  You are your own Light should you choose to accept this fact.

“You are Divine Consciousness in expression.  Claim it.”

Or Dan Scranton’s Channeling for 14 January…

https://danielscranton.com/defeating-others-is-not-a-part-of-the-shift-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

“We are more than satisfied with the progress of humanity, and furthermore, we are certain that your progress will continue to impress us.  Now, we know that it is easy to find the faults with where you are as a collective and to focus on them because they are right there in your face, very loud and somewhat destructive.

“So your approach now to helping humanity as the lightworkers you are has to be aimed at changing the way you perceive those noisy, low frequency aspects of the human collective.  We invite you to see that humanity is getting all of this out of its system in preparation for the shift in consciousness.  There are very old disputes that you have on planet Earth, and they actually extend back even further than when human life on Earth began.

“You are there settling very old scores, and you have needed to try the old way of going about it for quite some time.  Again, you need to realize what works by first realizing what does not work.  Seeking to defeat the so-called enemy, no matter how bad they appear to be, will never work for humanity, and there’s a reason for that.  The reason is that you are there to bring together all aspects of you so that you can become your higher selves.

“You cannot bring together all of the parts if any of the parts are eliminated or destroyed.  Again, we invite you to see the attempts to destroy one group of humans by another as the last gasp, the last ditch effort for certain aspects of humanity to cling to the third dimensional ways.

“If you are receiving this transmission, you are not among those who wish to do this.  And so again, we urge you all to be the peace, and the sanity, be the calm at the center of the storm.  And in so doing, you will integrate yourselves, your human collective, and this beautiful galaxy of ours.”