Archive for the ‘Guilt’ Category

Someone Else’s Guilt

August 3, 2022

We’ve still got the Squares in the 31 July 2022 Uranus-Karma-Nodes T-Square to Examine, but in the interim we’re coming up on another important 3 August (4:38 pm PDT1) event about Guilt that we need to cover.2 You’d think after last week we’d get a rest, but the Universe has other plans.

As the Transformation Game says, “The hardest tasks are only given to the best people,” and since our Guilt event is Super Heavy anyway, the Benefit to us of dealing with the two events together is Immense, as we’ll be able to weigh the Scale of our Karmic Guilt against the Truth of our Soul and our Mission. This Guilt Trip is all about Rebirth, so it can also propel us out of our Deep Introspection and into a more Balanced Place.

There are two Big Opportunities for developing our Adeptness (formerly Challenges) in this Guilt Trip. One is our Adeptness at Managing Guilt itself, on a Cosmic level.3 The other is our Potential Adeptitude at Mutational Rebirth.4 Both of these are Triply Self-Resolving,5 so our job is to Watch them Unfold, and not try to “correct” them. A Higher-Dimensional Unfoldment is happening, and it may tap into some of our Least Favorite Stories, many so Least-Favorite that we Chose to Unremember them long ago (see notes 6 and 7 below).

If we’re Tempted to React to the Emotions that Arise, we want to Hold them at the level of Sensation – Where do we Feel this in our Body, and How does it Feel there. By Indulging in Making Up or Remembering Stories about them, or trying to “fix” them, we’ll just prolong the Agony. If you can put your Full Attention squarely into the Center of the Sensation and Hold it there, the Discomfort will diminish pretty rapidly. Once the Sensation Moves, you’ve Won. Follow it, just to see Where it goes next and if its Feeling Tone Changes, but you’ve done the Work now, you can move on to other things whenever you Feel Done or Bored.

The Argument (Opposition) which the Cosmic Guilt Resolves is between the Native Creativity or Greatest Superpower of our Suppressed True Self,6 and Our Intuitive Understanding of Our Limitless Potential.7 This Argument is so Heavy because for many of us The Creativity of our True Self was Suppressed by our Programmers, using Guilt and Shame as their methodology.

This planet (Ixion) in our natal planetheon is in charge of Changing the Moral Order of the Culture, and can only do that Work by Transgressing Social Norms. Since Social Norms are the Cultural Boundaries and Glues that our Programmers taught us to Obey, we have to Work Through and Get Past our Guilt about Betraying these Limits and Quagmires if we are to Change the Moral Order – for instance, Changing from Patriarchy to Equality, from Judgment to Respect, or from War to Peace.

The result was and is a Glorious Mess when 🦖T.rump Transgressed Social Norms about Belief in Consensual Reality. But a Glorious Mess is always the Transitional State between one version of Consensual Reality and another. Women’s Rights today are a Glorious Mess, as is Righteous War – they’re both in Transition. If you’re a Male who’s Earned Power and Expect that the result will be the free use of Women as Objects, as has traditionally been the case under the upper attics of the Patriarchy, the World now looks like a Glorious Mess.

When the Consequences of Actions become Unpredictable, it becomes Riskier to Express Yourself. Yet in the way that Nixon Opened China to trade (now a Glorious Mess), 🦖T.rump has Opened the US to Alternative Consensual Realities. To the extent that we hope to see the World Change – Acting to ameliorate Climate Change for example – we need this.

It’s mostly Fear that keeps us from Stretching into the Superpowers of our Limitless Potential, partly because it seems so Outrageous and Fantastic that we cannot Defend it when Asked Why are you doing this?!? The Expectation that you will be able to Defend yourself is a prominent method of Enforcing Social Norms, as is the Expectation that we will be willing to Give Up Childish Things, like Pretending we have Superpowers.

When we think it through, we see that Everything we think of as Stable and therefore refreshingly Manipulable to our Advantage, is actually a Glorious Mess. Take the Economy, for instance, or the very Concept of Employment or even Health. Or Nature. We were taught that Abe Lincoln Freed the Slaves, but it’s obvious now that it’s still a Glorious Mess a century and a half later, and in some states we aren’t supposed to mention that now, because it might make White Folks Feel Bad.

The second Opportunity in this Guilt Trip for developing our Adeptness is our Potential Adeptitude at Mutational Rebirth.8 We won’t get into Conscious Manipulation of our DNA9 here, because the underlying Argument that the T-Square Resolves seems more Psychological, not that this can’t be Epigenetic. If we were to appoint a subcommittee to Renegotiate our Relationship to our own Mutation and Rebirth, to bend it more toward Collaboration and away from Resistance, we’d have to include Our Compulsions, Our Conceptions of 👻Death, and Our Beliefs about Belief.

Most of us here are Compelled toward Liberation from our Karmic Limitations, or we’d be reading something more Fun. Are we Straight on all Levels about the differences between and the common symptoms of Physical Death, Ego Death, Ascension, Walk-Ins, Walk-Outs, and the Renegotiations of our Inner Menagerie? Do we still Think that Seeing Is Believing, or have we Understood Bruce Lipton’s assertion that Believing Is Seeing?

That’s good, but if it’s Thinking it’s probably still 2D. What does our Heart say about Belief. Have we Examined that on all Levels? Our Expectations tell us a lot more about our Actual Beliefs than our Thoughts or even our Emotions do. We’ll also be Examining our Beliefs about our own Role in all of this – whether it all Revolves around us, or we’re the Prompter behind the curtain, or one of the Extras in the Crowd Scene.

These are the Energies that are Changing this week, and Remember that our Task is to Observe Everything rather than Fix Anything, because the astrology tells us that these Changes are Self-Resolving. Where you see a Glorious Mess this week, Celebrate its Glory. Glorious Mess is to Social Growth as Confusion is to Growth in Consciousness – they’re the First Stages.

This whole Drama is complicated by the event and its Angles being bang on the Cusps. For instance, our Rebirth is in the last Degrees of Libra (Air or Mind, Tentative and New), but our Transmutation is in the first few Degrees of Scorpio (Water or Emotion, Deep and Frozen). These two Energies are Merged, yet their basic Dissimilarities Create Disharmony – that, overall, is Self-Resolving! Similarly, our Intuition is in Gemini (Flibbertigibbet, Dissociated ), but the Unlimited Potential it is Merged with is in Cancer (Nurturing, Involved ) – another Paradox for us to Avoid Anal-yzing, because doing so will turn Sparkling Multidimensional Gems into Flat Brown Cow-patties.

We’ll Learn more about Transmutation next week, when its pet asteroid, Ka’epaoka’awela, is Amplified a day before the Full Moon.10

The Moon moves Out of Bounds (Folks are more Vulnerable) to the South 12:05 am PDT 7 August in 9 Sagittarius (The Green Man, Serving Mystery and Forever Forbidden from Identifying with Anything on the Surface) till 9:47 pm PDT 10 August in 7 Aquarius (Overcoming the Critical Mind ).11

  • 1 12:38 am BST 4 August in London, 9:38 am AEST 4 August in Canberra.
  • 2 Station of asteroid Nemesis (Guilt ) in 1 Aries (Single-Minded, Hard-Working, Opinionated).
  • 3 T-Square to Nemesis from several Heavy planets.
  • 4 T-Square to Haumea (Rebirth) in 28 Libra (Integration of Extremes) and Ka’epaoka’awela (Transmutation) in 2 Scorpio (Hard Battles to Overcome Ego).
  • 5 Firstly because the T-Square is a Diamond Star, which means that the T-Square’s Focus is also the Focus of a Finger of the Goddess, or at the sharp end of Wedge of two Quincunxes. Doubly because this Focus is also one corner of a Grand Trine. And Triply because the two T-Squares Complement one another by virtue of being Quincunx to one another. Again, we’ll have to be Mindful not to Meddle, but a Shift in one T-Square will also Shift the other one.
  • 6 Dwarf planet Ixion (Our Forbidden Genius) Out of Bounds (Exaggerated ) in 2 Capricorn (A Rupture in the Structure).
  • 7 Dwarf planet Chaos (Our Unlimited Potential ) Out of Bounds in 1 Cancer (Surrender to Spirit) sandwiched between dwarf planet Asbolus (Intuition) Out of Bounds in 29 Gemini (Embrace of the Underwhere to Bring Light) and asteroid Hybris (Inappropriately Self-Focused) in 2 Cancer (Doomed to Reject Ego while Retaining Enough Humility to Teach Everyone Else).
  • 8 The Haumea-Ka’epaoka’awela T-Square (note 4) springs from the Opposition between Pluto (Compulsion) in 28 Capricorn (Letting Go of a Lifetime of Negativity) and the Conjunction of dwarf planet Cyllarus (Death) Out of Bounds (Amplified) in 2 Leo (BOTH Fully Engaged AND Fully Detached ) and asteroid Kassandra (to be Disbelieved ) in 3 Leo (Enthusiastic, Tripping on Life, Weak on Details).
  • 9 Partly because Vianna Stibal’s books on it are out of print and the few copies available are selling for three digits. She has many later books that cover and extend that territory, but I’m not familiar with them yet.
  • 10 Ka’ekaopa’awela (Transmutation) Stationary (Strong) 6:15 pm PDT 10 August in 2 Scorpio (Hard Battles to Overcome Ego). 2:15 am BST 11 August in England and 11:15 am AEST 11 August in (Colonizer) Queensland.
  • Full Moon (Illumination of Secrets) 6:36 pm PDT 11 August in 20 Leo (Intense Focus on the Shadow, for Good or Ill ). 2:36 am BST 12 August in the Shire and 11:36 am AEST 12 August in the bush of the Eastern Coast.
  • 11 8:05 am BST 7 August till 5:47 am BST 11 August on Cardigan Bay, and
  • 5:05 pm AEST 7 August through 2:47 pm AEST 11 August on the Great Barrier Reef.


July 26, 2022

Are we still Chopping Water and Carrying Wood?

Brenda Hoffman nicely covers our Soul’s Descent 1 and our Potential Guilt 2 in one Channeling…


“This is a time of great upheaval for the earth and those of the earth. You are feeling that earth turmoil at the same time you are clearing issues that no longer pertain to new you. A combination of unpleasant sensations that are a small indication of your Universal strength.

“Many of you question the concept that you are a god. But because of your actions over the past few months, you are beginning to understand the phrase you learned as a child that God/the Universes ‘knows every hair on your head.’ For you are sensing the pain and fear of others you have not met and never will. Sensitivities beyond what is expected of a 3D human.

“Your responsibilities no longer include sensing everyone and everything. Even though those feelings are a natural skill, that skill is not productive in your new world.

“You are not negating humanity or other earth beings. Instead, you are allowing yourself to focus on you. Your new Rubicon crossing is from caring for everyone and everything to acknowledging your needs. A concept that was touted as selfish in 3D but is a necessary element in your new world…

“In addition to negating the caretaking of those in your 3D circle of friends and relatives, you are now doing so globally. Letting go globally has been extremely difficult for you. Your recent exhaustion and/or bouts of rage indicate how complicated this phase has been.

“You trained for eons to help earth through this transition. And as you did so, you enhanced your caretaking skills beyond what would be expected of a 3D earth being. Not only did you care for family and friends, you felt the weight of the earth and its inhabitants.

” ‘Love thy neighbor’ – especially those who looked and acted like you. ‘Love and caretake your family’ – no matter what your home experiences were. Encouraging you to acknowledge internally that everyone, including the earth, was more important than you.

“Earlier in this transition, you discovered the need to allow family and friends to find their way. You are now doing something similar globally – causing your feelings of being a bad or selfish person to once again surface.

“If someone told you that you were responsible for the well-being and feelings of all earth’s inhabitants, you would ignore them. Yet, you have been enmeshed in that seemingly unattainable concept since your earth’s entrance in this lifetime…

“You are slowly realizing you cannot – and no longer want – to control everyone and everything. You are tired. You are ready to retire from parenting the earth and everyone and everything of the earth. This new earth and new you are topsy-turvy from every other earth life you experienced.

“Caretaking, with ensuing power grabs, was key to a successful 3D earth life. To shift the earth beyond 3D, you needed to play your god role of knowing what was best for the earth. Then you needed to morph again into not caretaking the earth or its inhabitants.

“You initiated that last phase by letting go of family and friends who refused to caretake themselves, and then, doing the same with the earth – a phase you are just ending. Allowing yourself to shine as a self-contained entity, knowing others are more powerful than they believe and that the earth has proved to be the same.

“It is time for you to see and sense the sun. Those following you have accepted their heavy-lifting roles. Yours are over. Relax. Play. Laugh. You have completed your challenging pieces. It is time to be a role model of contentment. No longer do you need to experience sleepless nights worrying that your family member or the earth is incapable of self-care. You are done. You have completed those roles.

“It is time for your new personal role. A role you have not accepted in any previous earth life – but one you experienced in thousands of other frequencies and dimensions. Enjoy. Play. Laugh. Your caretaking roles are over.”

A Shaperson Enlisting the Aid of the Egyptian Goddess Bastet to Restore the Capacity for Joy, Play, and Laughter in someone Suffering from Karmic Guilt

  • 1 26-27 July 2022, Uranus (Soul ) in 19 Taurus (Giving Up Self-Image) Initiating (Beginning a New Cycle with) the Moon’s North Node (Lifetime Mission) while the Moon’s South Node (Held Emotions) in 19 Scorpio (Driven by Spirit but Plagued by Doubt ) Merges with (Conjoins) asteroid Karma (Karma) Out of Bounds (Exaggerated ) in 20 Scorpio (Dedicated to the Path but Challenged by Spiritual Pride till Spiritual Guidance Reigns). 19 Taurus (South Node) is home to (Merged With) the Fixed Star Zuben Eschamali (Social Reform with Corruption or Need for Status by the Reformers).
  • As long as Light-Workers have 2D or 3D Expectations for What 5D Planetary Evolution should Look Like, the Evolution will in their Obstructed view be Corrupted. The Uranus-Karma Nodal Axis is Squared (Annoyed – it’s a Grand Cross, in Earth Signs) by the Opposition (Debate) between asteroid Arachne (Grandmother Spider Who Weaves the Web of Life) in 17 Aquarius (Maintaining Tradition) and Mercury (Awareness) in 15 Leo (Individuation). 15 Leo (Mercury) is adjacent to (Entangled with) the Fixed Star Accubens (Resurrection).
  • The Uranus-North Node Merger chart makes a Grand Unx – 12 planets more or less equally spaced around the Zodiac, or three Grand Crosses and four Grand Trines. An Unx is one twelfth of something; the Twelfth Harmonic is about Pattern-Breaking. A Grand Unx is Self-Resolving, meaning we need to sit back and Observe, and not try to Intervene, because the astroevents are occurring at a Higher Vibration than our Intervention would be, and we’d just Screw it Up.
  • Mars (Action) in 15 Taurus (Iterative Surrender) Conjoins Uranus and North Node, causing many astrologers to worry about Violence and Disruption. Yes, the Lower Vibration of Mars can be Violent; it you Encounter that, Raise your Vibration (try Kegels for starters). And yes, Uranus is Disruptive, but it only Disrupts that which the Soul no long has use for, so it’s Good Riddance. Thank it for its Service while it was Useful, and wish it Goddess-Speed. 15 Taurus is home to the Fixed Star Menkar (Eruption), which may increase the odds of Violent Cleansings.
  • 2 Till 3 August asteroid Nemesis (Guilt ) is Stationary (Exaggerated ) in 1 Aries (Single-Minded, Hard-Working, Opinionated ). The Exaggeration comes with two Big Challenges (T-Squares), first to Nemesis itself from Very Heavy Challengers – OOB Ixion (Forbidden Genius Amplified ), OOB Chaos (Exaggerated Superpowers), OOB Asbolus (Exemplary Intuition), Hybris (Pride, Hubris), and second, to our Transmutational Rebirth (Haumea Conjunct Ka epaoka awela) from Not-Insignificant quarters – Pluto (Compulsion), Cyllarus (Death), Kassandra (Disbelief ). But both are Doubly Self-Resolving, so No Worries if we Stay Out of Their Way. We’ll Flesh these Out in a later post.

Charts of the Portals XI

September 24, 2020

That Guilt and Self-Doubt we’ve been Feeling all day is a correlate of the Challenge (T-Square) to our Willingness to Notice when we’re Feeling Guilt or Self-Doubt (Nemesis) and Choose to Feel Otherwise.  Said Challenge (T-Square) is part of the Strong Temptation to Give Away Our Power (Station of Hylonome) that’s in today’s chart…

Of course one way to Choose to Feel Otherwise is to Own Up to whatever vile thing we did that we’re Feeling Guilty about, and Make Amends.

More likely though that we haven’t done anything vile, we’re just picking up on a random thread of our Karmic Guilt, or even Guilt on the airwaves from a neighbor.  Karma is a Muscle – the more we Work it, the Stronger it gets, and the more we Revert it, the Weaker it gets.  It’s just a Choice – following a Noticing.  The more we Choose Otherwise, the sooner we Notice, and the sooner we Notice, the easier it is to Choose Otherwise.  Reverting our Karma is a Virtuous Cycle.

So I’m guessing that for most of us, today was just about Practicing Responding to Guilt or Self-Doubt with Loving Kindness toward ourself.

The rest of the Challenge (the base of the T-Square) is Complicated – it has Trust and Respect for All Things (Eurydike-Hopi) on one end and Boundaries, Claiming our Power, and Expansion (Pallas-Stationary Hylonome-Jupiter) on the other.  While it’s been ten days since Jupiter was Stationary, it’s still moving at a slow walk, so it will hype up that Strong Power-Claiming quite a bit, while it will be much easier than usual for us to Notice it – that is, Set a Boundary between it and our usual Unconscious Tendency to Ego-Identify with it.

I keep waiting for someone who’s used to Ego astrology to ask, “Hey, wait a minute!  How can Hylonome be Giving Away Our Power in one paragraph and Claiming Our Power in the next??” – but no one ever has.  So I’ll answer it anyway.

The Observing Mind is Dual.  It specializes in Either/Or.  The Universe is Both/And.  If you can Think Of it, it’s going on somewhere, and that doesn’t count all the things you haven’t Thought Of yet, which are also going on somewhere.  That’s why we Enjoyed Hitchhiker’s Guide so much – it demonstrated what we actually already knew but weren’t allowed to admit because in Western Culture the Non-Dual is an SEP Field.  Otherwise we wouldn’t be able to so Enjoy huffing up our Ego Field with Judgment, would we.

So yes, astrology points out the Dimensions, not the Directions.  The Dimension of Hylonome is about Our Power, and either Claiming It or Surrendering It.  The Direction is Giving Away on one side, and Claiming on the other.  Direction is Either/Or, Dimension is Both/And.  Hylonome Exaggerates Our Power and What We Do With It.  Whether we Use it to Support Our Own Choices and Goals and Desires, Use it to Suck Up to someone whom we Believe might Support Our Choices and Goals and Desires, or just Squander It in “Oh, I’m sorry!” unnecessary Niceness, is our own Moment-to-Moment Choice.

This is why a Guideline of Manifestation is to Avoid Asking for anything using Negation.  To the Dualistic Observing Mind, the Yes-or-No part is what’s critical – Abundance or Scarcity for instance.  But to the Unconscious, which is the Source of our Power to Manifest Energy into Form, Abundance and Scarcity Live on the same Dimension.  A request for Less Scarcity may well register as a request for Scarcity, because the Genie behind the curtain is focused on the Dimension.

In the Jungian World at least, the Unconscious is also the seat of our Urge to Wholeness.  It’s an Original Blessing, not an Original Sin.  From this Perspective, which is the one we usually use, the Genie will hear our request for Less Scarcity as a request for a Curriculum on Scarcity, so we can Learn it’s Edges.  Long term, that’s probably the most effective approach to Abundance, but if What We Want is Abundance, we want to Ask For that end of the Dimension.

Of course, if we’re Expecting more Abundance than our Karma Reversion merits, the Genie will deliver an Illustration of the Karma that blocks the path.  That’s why the full PIAVA process requires that we first, PIAVA What We Want.  Then second, Change the Subject so our Old Patterns don’t contaminate our PIAVA with their usual Yes-Buts and What-Ifs.  And third, if we don’t get what we’ve PIAVAedPay Attention to What We Did Get, because it can Lead us through our remaining Karmic Impediments.

If we can manage to convert our Original-Sin Beliefs about a Universe that’s “red of claw and sharp of tooth”…

…as Marlin Perkins used to describe it, to a Universe that has our Best Interests at Heart, then we can Seek the Benefit in everything that befalls us.  It’s a Powerful Practice to PIAVA in reverse – when we’re Surprised by something we haven’t been Aware that we’ve been Asking for, we can PIAVA “who was that Masked Man” who Asked for that?

There’s an excellent chance that he or she or it is actually One Of Us, maybe a part of us we haven’t even met yet.

Which is basically what the other side of the T-Square base says, Trust in Respect for All Things (Eurydike-Hopi) – in a Benevolent Universe and a Wholeness-Seeking Unconscious, there are only Friends.