Shame and Healing

The Moon is back In Bounds now (less Excitability), till it goes Out of Bounds again (to the South) 4:42 am PDT 3 September 2022. Our next big astroevent should be Feelable already, as Converting Fear to Power (dwarf planet Sedna Stationary) is prominent till at least 11:33 pm 30 August. More about that soon.

Shame is one of, if not The, hardest Emotion to hide, and the hardest to Heal, and it has a prominent role in the 1:17 am PDT 27 August 2022 New Moon. While it may be hard, it’s surrounded astrologically in the New Moon chart by Supportive Friends.¹ The Guardian recently published a timely article about Exploring the Extremes of Shame…

.https://www.theguardian.com/music/2022/aug/24/oliver-sim-the-way-i-dealt-with-shame-in-the-past-hasnt-worked-at-all.

The other Prominence in the New Moon, which influences the next few weeks, is a Doubly Self-Resolving Superpower Transmutation to Enlightenment.² Can you beat that? Since it’s Doubly Self-Resolving, it’ll probably be a serious Challenge only if you have Afflictions to early Scorpio. On the other hand, many folks see Scorpio itself as an Affliction! Seen from Inside (from a Scorpio’s Perspective), Scorpio just means Fearlessness.

When Scorpio’s doing a Fearless and Searching Inventory of you, however, it can be a serious affront to your Boundaries. So folks with Vulnerable planets like Sappho (Self-Love) or an Afflicted Eurydike (Distrust ), or even Phaedra (Shame), in early Scorpio may be targets for Perp Instincts. If they Attack you, hold up your Garlic and Cross, keep your Head Up, and Back Away without losing eye contact, like you would from a snarling Dog. With a drooling Person, though, don’t look them directly in the eye, but keep a Diffuse gaze on their face, in case they lunge and you need to use your Cross as a Sword. People with Perp Instincts, even Strangers, can Attack without provocation or warning, so keep your Garlic handy.

Better yet, Protect yourself. While Vulnerability is the Ultimate in Protection, you may need something more Disinviting with Perpetual Perps, because they’ll Test your Vulnerability repeatedly until you Stand Up for Yourself. Today’s Perp may be one you know well Personally, or a Total Stranger that through their own Programming knows Instinctively where your Psychic Wound is, and How it Works. You could be just passing each other on the street. My First Teacher used to say, No One Can Invade Your Space When It’s Filled with Your Own Energy. If you know how to do it, “Running Your Energy” is an Important practice,³ as is “Using your Mirrors.”⁴

• ¹ In 5 Virgo (The Edge between Fear and Ego Death). That’s 9:17 am BST in Nottingham and 6:17 pm AEST in Eastern Oz. The New Moon Opposes minor planet Gonggong (Intrusive Memories) and asteroid Phaedra (Shame), both in 5 Pisces (Deep Deep Mystical Awareness Sheltered from Ego by Lack of a Need for Certainty). While the New Moon Chandra Degree Symbol suggests we’ll have work to do, the Gonggong-Phaedra Karmic Shame Chandra Symbol suggests we’ll plow right through it without great difficulty. The latter is also the home of Fixed Star Sadalmelek (Lucky One of the King). The Opposition is part of a Grand Cross, which implies helpful Balance. The other two partygoers are Mars (Action) in Gemini (Flexibility) Opposite Pandora (Hope) and Atropos (Natural Expiry of Karma) in Sagittarius (Letting Go) – more Boons.
• ² Minor planet Zhulong (Enlightenment ) in 6 Scorpio (The Edge between Self-Importance and Selflessness) and asteroid Ka’epaoka’awela (Transmutation) at 3 Scorpio (Addiction to Karma Till the New Energy Makes us Realize How Empty It Is) are at the Focus of a T-Square (Challenge or SuperPower) over Ceres (Sustainability) in 6 Aquarius (Learning to Surrender to the Mystery) and Lachesis (Karma that can be Consciously Let Go) in 5 Aquarius (Surrender to Merging the Chthonic with the Cosmic) Opposite the Stellium of Samadhi (Enlightenment ) in 4 Leo (Dedicated to Shadow Work and Breaking Through to Discovery), Cyllarus Out of Bounds (Focus on Death/Ego Death) in 3 Leo (Larger than Life, but sometimes Missing Important Details), Sisyphus Out of Bounds (Perpetually Perpetual Tasks) in 5 Leo (An Old Soul Who Discovers that the Old Rules No Longer Apply), and Varuna Out of Bounds (The Life Force Unchained ) in 7 Leo (Ready for Enlightenment ).
• Zhulong-Ka’epa are also the Focus of a Finger of the Goddess (first order Self-Resolution) from Mars (Action) in 5 Gemini (Expanding into Limitlessness) to Jupiter (Expansion) in 8 Aries (Acceptance of All without Judgment ). Mars in Gemini would work better with a Diversion than a Frontal Counterattack. Jupiter in Aries should provide plenty of Creativity for your Diversions.
• Second-order Self-Resolution is provided by a Zhulong-Ka’epa Grand Trine (Dumb-Luck Blessings) to Veritas (Truth of the Mind ) in 7 Cancer (Returning to Source) and Gonggong-Phaedra (see note ¹).
• ³ Something on the order of Moving Your Attention to the Center of the Earth, Picking Up Earth Energy like wrapping Spaghetti around a fork, Drawing that Energy as if through a Straw or Firehose Up through the Body of the Earth and into your Legs, and pouring it into the Vessel that is your Pelvis; Moving your Attention Up through the Top of your Head and Up through the Sky into Source, Collecting Source Energy as if Filling your Lungs with Air, Drawing that Energy Down into your Head, Neck, Torso, Belly, and Pouring it into your Pelvis and Churning it with the Earth Energy; Then Drawing that Combined and Mixed Energy Up the front of your Body and Back through each Chakra, Up to Chakra Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, however High you’re accustomed to go. There are a zillion variations, and none are right or wrong. You can make up your own version, in fact, you need to, so it Fits your own Energy Body like a glove, and so you can do the whole process rapidly. Practice till you can do it Instantaneously using only Intention.
• ⁴ When Confronted with Energy you don’t like, hold a Wardrobe Mirror up in front of you, facing outward toward the Source of the Energy, so that the Energy is Focused Back to its Source. If you aren’t sure of the Source, make a Guess and Test it by Holding the Mirror for several minutes to see if your Feelings Change. If they don’t, Guess and Test again. When they do, Hold the Mirror there till you Feel Safe. Your current Boss may be using the same Ports that your Uncle installed when you were a Child.
• This is not just a Protection, this is a Healing. Our Programmers left Holes in the Back of our Aura, where we couldn’t see them, so they could reach in Energetically and Manipulate us like a Puppet. Our Boundaries and Ego are Overwhelmed when a Perp Intuits these Ports and uses them for their own Purposes. This is Karmic, and the more you Allow yourself to be Manipulated, the more you Cement the Karma in place. The more you “Use your Mirrors,” the more you Strengthen New Habits and the more you Weaken the Old Karma. Eventually, Using your Mirrors will Seal Up the Holes in your Aura, so you can really Fill Your Body with Your Own Energy, without Leaks. Then you will seldom Encounter Energy you don’t like, because you’ll no longer be a Magnet for it. If you do Feel it again after that, just Use your Mirrors on it.
• We were Programmed to Feel Guilty when we Discovered these Holes and tried to Plug them. So we have to Expect to Feel Guilt when we Use our Mirrors. That’s the sign that you’re Healing your Energy Body. Embrace the Guilt, and Recognize that it Identifies what needs Healing and what’s Getting Healed. That Guilt is the Proof that you’re Catching the Embodiment or Generalization of “your” Perp In The Act, and Setting Firm Boundaries Against their Manipulation. As your Psychic Wounds Heal, you’ll Feel less Guilt, till you Feel Strong and Whole instead.
• Our Codependence is often based on Holes in our Aura which aren’t Odious to us. We may have been Programmed to Keep Our House Clean, or to be Morally Outraged by certain Characteristics or Behaviors of other people. We may even base our Relationships on having our Programs Matched. Even though you may have very well-developed Justifications for these Obsessions and Reactions to Other People, they’ll still Stand Between you and Enlightenment. When you Begin to Notice these Codependencies and are Inspired to Work on them, you can also Use your Mirrors on them.

New Project Week II

As we move into our New Self (asteroid Klotho Stationary 4:30 am PDT 7 June 2021 in 18 Libra), it will behoove us to Attend to our Relationships with Abuse and with Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus Stationary 9:24 am PDT 14 June in 16 Pisces). Though it’s only one of many Challenges that will Confront our Newbie shortly after our Rebirth, Unconscious and Conscious Changes in our Relationship with Abuse and Privilege is probably the biggest one. The intervening Challenges…

• Emotional Intensity (Moon moving Out of Bounds for four days starting 10:57 pm PDT 9 June in 18 Gemini). This hits a peak on 11 June (Moon Stationary in North Declination 25:39 and Longitude 11 Cancer at 9:08 pm PDT), and fades on 13 June (Moon moving back In Bounds at 6:19 pm PDT in 4 Leo).

• Ego Death(s) Required to Let Go of Karma (asteroid Karma moves into Virgo 2:34 pm 9 June). If you have a Journal, Karma was previously in the Sign of Ego Death (Virgo) between 1 December 2020 and 23 January 2021), before it backed back into Leo till 2 April. It’s been moving forward in its third Dance over the last five Duads (2½ Degrees) of Leo since then. This deserves a post of its own.

💥 For now we’ll just say that Virgo is what happens between the Cyclic Culmination of our Individual Identity (Leo) and Meeting Not-Us or Other (Libra). Just as Pisces is about Letting Go of Emotional Baggage so we don’t have to drag it with us into our next Adventure, Virgo is about Letting Go of Obsolete Identities so we don’t mess up our Relationships with Others by “Pretending” (usually Unconsciously) to be someone we ain’t. “Others” includes not just People, but since Everything in the Universe is Conscious, it also includes Everything that we aren’t Being or Owning in the Moment. For example, if you Identify with Loving Nature, prove it to yourself by Inviting a Bird to perch on your finger, without pooping on your hand or giving you Salmonella.

💥 We also need to say that our most troubling Karma is where We Would Rather Die than Feel That Again, aka our “Held Emotions” (South Node). Because most Hupers Believe that we’re Once-Born or Twice-Born, we misinterpret “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That” as “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That,” while it’s really “I’d Rather Die Than Feel That” – Ego Death. We’re just sawing through one of the legs of the three-legged stool we usually sit on. If we Want to minimize Pain, we’d stand up before we did that. But if you know what it means to Go Without an Identity (ie, stepping out of your Identity) for a few minutes, I’d love to know. The Emotion of Confusion is the closest we can come, and we regard Confusion as one of the best Emotions because it’s the Doorway to Evolution. We usually try to suppress it by Figuring Out What’s “Wrong,“ which is one of our most Self-Destructive Habits.

• Illuminations about the State of our Planet and the Likelihood of our Survival if we continue on our Current Trajectory (Annular Eclipse of the Sun 3:52 am PDT 10 June in 20 Gemini [Sabian Symbol “A modern cafeteria displays an abundance of food, products of various regions“], primarily impacting the several weeks following it). It will be visible if you happen to be crossing the North Pole (bring a Boat, that’s cold Water). An Annular Eclipse is one where the moon is far enough from the Earth that it doesn’t quite appear to cover the face of the Sun – an Almost-Total Eclipse. Consciousness Grows by Discovery, not by Invention, and under Eclipses we Discover what’s now missing, that we hadn’t noticed previously. For more details, see https://svs.gsfc.nasa.gov/4910.

• An Increase in Selfishness (Mars enters Leo 6:33 am PDT 11 June). Which is not always a Negative thing. We can’t Love Other Fully until we Love Ourself Fully. Given our Illuminations about the State of the Planet and its Huper inhabitants, though, the Greedheads will probably be making another Power Grab. If we Pray enough for it, they might Betray their Heartlessness and be met with Rotten Tomatoes, or better yet new laws about, say, voting, taxing, and legal theft, and new Cultural Norms about Worshiping Wealth. The few Greedheads who aren’t Sociopaths might even have Epiphanies about their own antisocial Greed. Mars will stay in Leo till the end of July.

While we usually just dwell on the Back-of-Hand/Palm dynamics of Abuse and Privilege, we should actually look at the Pros and Cons of each. For instance, having Privilege can make so many things so much Easier. Rather than Gloating about our supposed Superiority as the source of our Privilege, or arming ourself to the hilt to keep the Rabble from “stealing” back what we’ve stolen from them, or Resisting Privilege because we’re Conscious of the Abuse that results and Guilty about it, we might instead find our Gratitude for our Privilege. In 5D where Collaboration outduels Competition, we’ll no long be in a Zero-Sum World, but back in a Natural World where the Sum is Much Greater than its Parts. From a place of Gratitude for our historical Privilege we may be able to Share it or Teach Others how to Enjoy it without creating more Abuse – not like the Missionaries that enabled the Conquistadors, however. How would we avoid that?

As for Abuse, until enough people Unite against the Psychopaths and Sociopaths and Missionaries (which will require that we no longer Worship Wealth and Greed) and enforce a meaningful Equality, the most positive feature I can envision for Abuse, is for it to Inspire us to Delete our Abuse Karma. History of course was written by the Abusers, who were by and large proud of their Conquists, so the Horrors of our Karmic History may be Exaggerated by their Pride, though I’m not naive enough about the Cruelty and Sadism of our Species, or the extreme Privilege of the Abusers, to Believe that any such Exaggeration has been more than slight.

“Trust but Verify” is good advice. During the 1980s, when Pluto was in Scorpio and Recovery was all the rage, I Learned to Ask, “What color is the wallpaper?” to remind myself that most PTSD episodes are Flashbacks and not Present-Moment. The Jungle “wallpaper” of Vietnam, and the Bare Metal “wallpaper” of the Ships, contrasts with even unadorned wallboard, so we could distinguish hallucinations from real napalm, torture, anal probes, and implants. Grounding is always a helpmate (running an imaginary cable from the base of your spine to the center of the Earth), Eating, and Orgasm are reliable Grounders.

Mirrors are always useful, especially when you’re trying to Heal Feelings that aren’t yours, which is not possible. Mirrors are even useful as a first response – when you’re Feeling awful without obvious Triggers, take the first person who comes to mind, and for five to ten seconds hold a wardrobe Mirror between you and them, facing them. If your Feelings become more acceptable, you know you’re trying to run their Emotions through your Body – or, they’re Manipulating you. If you’re being Manipulated, even with the best Intentions, it’s never fun. Most folks are totally Unconscious that they’re Manipulating. Mirrors are a good strategy for dealing with Climate Deniers, Mask Objectors, Gun Freaks, folks who want to Deny your Vote and Control your Body, and other Antichrist Lovers. You won’t need to get into a hopeless morass of Conversation with them, and if you position your Mirror so it Reflects their Energy back at them, they’ll get a bit of their own toxic “Medicine.”

The Big Advantage of using “Then versus Now” tricks, Grounding, and Mirrors, is that they’re Habit-forming. When we’re Vulnerable to Manipulation by Other People’s Energy, it’s because our Programmers “Intentionally” (though probably Unconsciously) carved a Hole in the back of our Aura, so they could reach in and pull our strings whenever they wanted or needed to. It often looks and feels like Shaming. Habitual Manipulators “see” those Holes, usually Unconsciously, so we can be Manipulated by strangers we pass on the street. Our Programmers just thought it was good parenting, and you may do it yourself when your own kids threaten to drive you Batty. As these “tricks” become a Habit, the hole in our Aura actually Seals Up, so not only do the “tricks” become second-nature, they also Heal the Source of our Dis-Ease. When our Will is Healthily Self-Serving, Habitual Manipulators pass us by without a second glance, because we’re useless as an Object for their Power Games.

Issues such as these may Confront our Experiential Infant this coming week. It never hurts to recall that we’re actually an Eternal Energy Nexus (often called an “Immortal Soul”) borrowing a Material Body. Energy can never be Destroyed, only Transformed. Revelation of Denial (dwarf planet Eris) remains Out of Bounds through all of this (until 4:12 am PDT 18 July in 20 Cancer), so don’t be Surprised if New Information about your Personal or Karmic History or Herstory comes into your Consciousness during these Adventures. If you’ve noticed that almost everything above occurs in 16-20 Degrees of one Sign or another, you’ll be checking your natal chart to see what will be Lit Up for you, as your own Energy System meshes with the Planet’s.

All of this is Important, because as we get past the 14 June Exaggeration of Abuse and Privilege (Nessus Station), we drop into a week of very Intense Manifestation Energy, as three Big Energies are simultaneously Emphasized. When Energies Conjoin in Time, it’s as if they’re Conjoining in Longitude – and these Big Fellas are also actually in neighboring Degrees of their respective Signs. The three Energies are Manifestation Itself (dwarf planet Makemake Stationary 6:42 pm PDT 19 June in 6 Libra), Expansion (Jupiter Stationary 8:04 am PDT 20 June in 3 Pisces, and The Opportunity to Jettison Karma Early (asteroid Lachesis Stationary 2:42 pm PDT 20 June in 6 Scorpio).

If as is the case hereabouts, you’re Wondering why the Foundations of your Personal Infrastructure seems to be Falling Apart, each Failure is a Big Clue about the Unconscious Energies “you” are running but not Owning, that Block what you’re trying to Manifest. Take time to Sit with each Failure of Intention or Function, and Merge with it Energetically. The Objective is to Meet each of your Unconscious Blocks as Energy Clusters in the Unconscious, Meet them in Neutral territory without Bias or Judgment on your part, and with an Open Mind Ask the Question, “Is this Energy really My Own, but I’ve been Denying it?”

Held Emotions II

Our initiation into The Most Important Thing Is to Embrace our Held Emotions (Saturn Stationary Conjunct the South Node) is the 12 September, 2019 (8:30 pm PDT) Illumination of the symbol for Respect for All Things (Station of asteroid Hopi) in the same 14 Capricorn Degree.  These Conspirators are joined by the symbol for Becoming Aware of the Need for Self-Sovereignty (dwarf planet Hylonome, Stationary until 21 September) in 11 Capricorn.  That’s kind of a Knife Edge, Respecting All Things Without Giving Away Our Power to Any of Them.

The Self-Sovereignty issue is greatly Enhanced by a Challenge (T-Square) to the Expansion of our Awareness (Jupiter) from the symbols for Self-Sovereignty itself (Lilith) and Action/Anger (Mars).  Most especially, we’re Instructed by these “Stars” to Take Action to Get Neutral about Our Anger at The People Who Have Taken Our Power When We Gave It To Them.  We’re Angry at the People who have Taken Our Power, but it is Us – Unconsciously – who Gave It to Them.  Most of the time this happens because our Programmers installed Holes in our Auras that they could reach into and Pull our Puppet-Strings.

Here’s the chart…

If you’ve raised or otherwise worked closely with Children, you’ve probably Unconsciously or even Consciously done the same thing – found a place where you could Manipulate them, usually through Shame, in order to keep them under Control.   Especially in groups, they can be a handful…

Manipulating others for your own Gain isn’t the Travesty that it sounds like – we all do it to some extent.  There are two problems that arise when you Manipulate Children with Shame.

First, that Hole in their Aura doesn’t Heal on its own.  It stays with them into Adulthood until – and if – they Discover it and Heal it.  Till then they’re Compelled to Give Their Power Away to anyone who Discovers their Puppet Strings, and to their Frustration and Anger – and Shame, they won’t know why or how.

And second, that Hole wouldn’t be there unless it was part of their Karma, which makes it more Difficult for them to Discover and Heal it, because it was embedded in the Unconscious before they were even born.  These Huper Lifetimes are worse than Gollum’s Riddles!

There’s another Configuration that Illuminates this whole process – the symbol for Fate and Choice (asteroid Moira) and the symbol for Oath-Making and -Breaking (dwarf planet Orcus) are Merged (Conjunct) in the Hopi Station chart, and they volunteer to Help us with this Discovery (along with asteroid Veritas [Truth], they make a Double Trine Bridge [Easy Crossing] across the Nodal Axis).

Until we become Conscious of our Karma, and the Hole(s) in our Aura, we stuck with our “Fate.”  Once we Become Aware of it (Hylonome), we have Choice.  We were probably between a Rock and a Hard Place, but at some point lost in the Mists of Time, we Swore an Oath, and we Obeyed it, we Adopted it as part of our Identity, perhaps as the Core of our Identity.  Habits become Unconscious through Repetition, and in subsequent Lifetimes the Repetition was well established, but the Oath was Forgotten.  Bingo, Karma.  To Convert Fate to Choice we need to Break the Oath.  But we’ve long since Forgotten what is was.

That’s a fine Story for 3D Linear Time, but as you know, Time doesn’t really work that way.  If you’re like me, for the last week your “Random” Memories have been popping up all over the map, with little “rhyme or reason.”  That’s Real Time, with Bleedthrough from whatever Lifetime (which our Creative Memory usually inserts into the “Past” in our Current Lifetime) dripping through seemingly unpredictably, though we can often Discern Themes.

Creative Memory makes it seems like all these Random Tidbits and Recurrent Themes are part of “Us,” and they become our Identity.  But again, it doesn’t really work that way.  That’s 3D Ego-Level “Us.”  Shift your Identity to your Soul, and it looks very Different.  Karma is Personal only to the Ego, not to the Soul.  On the Soul Level, when we Choose to Slum it for a while on Earth, we pick a Project we want to help the Planet with.  The Karma is in the Energy Field of the Planet.  Other planets may not even contain the moving parts that “our” Karma is made from.

We come here to Help Convert some aspect of the Planet’s Fate to Choice, by contributing Replications of Alternative Patterns.  With enough Reps, by ourself and Others, new Habits are built into the Earth’s Energy Template.  Epigenetics, it’s called when Personalized to the Huper Level.  Project that back through Herstory.  Hupers used to be in the Habit of starving to Death in a bad winter following a poor Harvest.  Then Volunteers like you came and organized ways to store Food from one winter to the next, and ways to move Food from one valley that had a fortunate Harvest, to another that didn’t.  New Habits.

There was nothing Ego-Personal about all that; it was “just” Souls monkeying with the Energy Fields.  Death is no big deal to the Soul, it’s just another Experience.  The advantage of staying Alive longer was to build greater Knowledge and Wisdom.  A Hunter or Forager or Farmer with fifty years of Hunting or Foraging or Farming in their Winter Count is far ahead of one who flames out at twenty years.  Of course that’s just a Story too.  We as Hupers don’t generally have the Bandwidth to actually Grok what’s really going on in Dimensions (and Dementias) that we can’t even See or Touch.  But the more Metaphors and Stories and Perspectives we have, the more we can Intuit.

So how then do we actually Help Extinguish this Planetary Karma?  What if we could gather up enough Passion, Focus, and Power to just tell it to “Leave Now, and Never Come Back!“?

It’s too easy to Forget that Karma is not Present Moment, it’s not Real.  It’s a Paper Tiger, a Shadow Puppet.  Sméagol had to repeat his New Anthem three times before it took hold.  Your Attachment to “your” Karmic warp in the Force, the one you came here to Help Convert, may be a little stronger; it may take you up to ten Reps to gather enough Courage, Commitment, Passion, Confidence, Focus and Power to Banish it Forever.  The sooner you start, the sooner you finish.

We could even make “Leave Now, and Never Come Back!” another silent partner in PIAVA.  In the next post we’ll look at the other side of the coin, Healing the Holes in our Aura directly.

Gauntlet XII – More Con Games

Well, we get a couple of weeks without Stations, till the Ides of May.  That should be a relief.

In the interim, Action/Agitation meets Compulsion on 26 April (4am PDT) when Pluto Initiates Mars, beginning a new two-year Cycle at 22 Capricorn, “By accepting defeat gracefully, a general reveals nobility of character.”  As Alan Watts averred, it’s harder to Let Go of our “Good” Karma than our “Bad” Karma.  So we may be Asked to Let Go of our Attachment to Success over the next few days and the next couple of years.

Then on 28 April (12am PDT) Juno leaves Pisces and moves into Aries.  Since Juno represents the Edges of Consciousness, that should make Life a little Easier, as we’re likely to be Growing our Spiritual Consciousness more rather than our Emotional Consciousness.  While Held Emotions (the one we’d Rather Die than Feel) may not be so prominent, we’re still likely to be dealing with Death, as one of the more prominent elements of Spirit is its immutability.  If that’s an intellectual Concept for you rather than a Foundation of your Beliefs, you may be in for Surprises.

Chariklo is about Confidence, and we’ve just squirmed out of a fairly big Challenge to our Confidence, as Chariklo and Pluto shared their Stations over the last few days (Gauntlet IX to XI).  It turns out though that our Confidence Work isn’t quite done.  For the next week we’ll be Working on Confidence in our Self-Sovereignty, as Chariklo Initiates Lilith on 1 May, starting a new nine-year Cycle at 20 Capricorn – “A hidden choir singing during a religious service.”

The “hidden choir” could be our True Self telling us what we’d be Doing and Saying if we were Speaking and Acting from our Self-Sovereignty, or it could be the echos of the many Voices that, throughout our Life, have told us Who and How We Should Be and Do instead of Being and Doing Ourself.  As a Jungian I assume that the Unconscious is always trying to move us forward, even when it requires us to walk through the Swamp instead of around it. 

So I’m opting for the Hidden Choir being our Shoulds.  After all, would our True Self be Shoulding on us?  You know how it Feels when you ignore an Intuition, that “Still Small Voice”?  That’s more likely to be the Voice of our True Self.  Mine doesn’t come from over my Shoulder.  When we get talkback from over our Should-er, if we Notice and just Imagine turning our head to look, or listening for the tone of voice and accent, or just Asking, it will probably be pretty easy to Discern whose Shoulds we’ve Internalized as our own in the current case.

Then we can cycle through Anal-yzing, PIAVAing, and State-Changing (Tapping, Kegeling, Poor-Sweethearting, Cancel-Neutralize-Upgrading, and the like) to examine the Agenda of that particular Control Freak, to see if their input is still useful in our Present Life.

Which is kind of the Other Side of the Coin here, or the Other Side of the Mirror – when our own Control Freak comes out of its cave and we Notice that we’re wanting someone else to Act or Speak differently than they are, it would be of great value to our Evolution for us to cycle through Anal-yzing, PIAVAing, and State-Changing to get to the Roots of our own Distaste for whatever it is that they’re up to. 

It may contribute more to Confidence in our Self-Sovereignty to Work with the times when we Should Other, than it does to Work with the Internalized Voices that Should us!

Be Mindful that Shame and Guilt are primary tools that Control Freaks use to manipulate our Behavior, so be Aware that these Emotions may be your first indication that you’re being Shoulded.  Nothing wipes out Confidence and Sovereignty faster and more completely than Shame, and it takes a huge Effort to get Present with Shame.  The first step is Noticing, and if you’re lucky enough to do that, then Poor-Sweethearting will be worth trying, as well as Tapping and Kegeling.

Karma Station II

Well, as we said (more or less) at the end of the previous post, at the Karma Station, Rebirth (Haumea) was flying high and pointing Heavenward at the top of a Kite while Challenged (T-Squared) by the Dilemma (Opposition) of How Much Truth (Aletheia) can we stand to Integrate into our New Beginning (Klotho), while Grounded (the tail of the Kite) by Revelation of our Soul’s Purpose (Eris-Uranus).  Resolution of the Challenge is much aided (Diamond Star) by Cooperation (Sextile) between Fear (Sedna) and Self-Love (Sappho).

In the chart Haumea doesn’t look like it’s soaring much; it’s in the lower left.  The orientation of the chart is determined by the time zone and time of day.  On the Left Coast of North America, Haumea was overhead at 11:30pm PDT on 7 April, while the chart is for the moment of Karma’s Station at 6pm.  We focus on Energy, as embodied by the Angles and Configurations.  In this regard, Energy is Exalting Haumea, no matter where She is in the circle.

That’s an interesting concept, Fear Cooperating with Self-Love to midwife a Rebirth of our Soul’s Purpose into the Ego.  In fact, Fear Cooperating with Self-Love by itself is an interesting concept.  Remember though that it’s not any part of the Cosmos that’s Negative or Positive, it’s our Perception that can make that part seem one or the other.  And of course the Dualistic mind dearly Loves to Separate, Evaluate, and Pronounce, whereas in Real Life it’s just It Is As It Is, the Judgments are our own, almost always having to do with our Held Emotions.  We’ve been Learning lately how Fear is just Power, and a lot of it – as our Kegels have been demonstrating, eh? 

Let’s look at that Grounding Chord, Uranus-Eris.  This is a new Cycle that lasts almost a century.  The Initiation was 8 June 2016 (around 10pm PDT) at 24 Aries, “Blown inward by the wind, the curtains of an open window take the shape of a cornucopia: Openness to the influx of spiritual energies.”  With less than five Degrees of Separation, this Cycle is just beginning to burrow Underground.  It won’t emerge into mainstream Culture until 2039 (the Waxing Square), another two decades.

This illustrates one of the most important elements of Self-Sovereignty.  If we’re mirroring our Culture or copying our betters instead of following our Heart, we’ll be deep in Denial about the ongoing Influx of Spiritual Energies.  Like the sign on the wall where I used to work, “If you’re not part of the Solution, you’re part of the Problem.”  This first quarter of a Cycle is where Foundations are built – by those who Respect the Energy whether Weasel News promotes it or not. 

Which takes us back to the first chart in the previous post, the 15-19 Degree chart.  The Initiation of the Moon by Lilith occurred two hours after the Karma Station, only a Degree and a half from being exactly one Sign away.  Moon Cycles only last a month, but they’re very much In-Your-Face, as any woman can aver.  The Cycle was born at 17 Capricorn, “A repressed woman finds a psychological release in nudism: The escape from bondage to social inhibitions and a reliance upon the wisdom of the body.”  This symbol is about the Degree, not the Moon or Lilith – the reiteration of theme is as serendipitous as it is remarkable.

This foretells a major Letting Go of Unconscious Codependent Patterns over the next month, perhaps at the price of having to confront Held Emotions.  Held, or Forbidden, Emotions are those which guard the sanctity of our Karma.  They’re almost always Unconscious, since unless we’re one of those people who’s fond of saying “I’m not one of those people who…” then we repeat those Patterns without even noticing that we’re doing it; it’s just the Way the World Is to us.

The Angle between Karma and the Initiation, an Unx (one Sign – “Unx” means one twelfth), tells us that we’re peering into the doorway to the Unconscious.  As such, our most Powerful tool is probably PIAVA (Prayer, Intention, Asking, Vizualising, Affirming, plus several extensions – see https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava-review/).  When we’re dealing with the Unconscious, Dynamic or Masculine methods of Creativity just create the sort of messes Shakespeare and Homer loved to write about.  We need Magnetic or Feminine methods.

The Unconscious is in many many ways a Wild Animal, and we don’t tame a Wild Animal with a leghold trap.  We patiently Offer Her Food at a neutral location, and sit patiently quite a distance away, with our gaze perpendicular to the Critter, keeping our Expectations low.   Every several days we try moving a half-inch closer, while watching out of our corner-eye to see if our Intended is nervous.  If She is, we back off a little the next day. 

She knows we’re there, and our presence is a counterpoint to our Gift, a condition so to speak.  She knows that this is a Negotiation, and that She has the upper hand.  She makes these kinds of Negotiations every day, for Survival, with other Critters big and small, and She’s an Expert at the Art of the Deal.  So we follow the PIAVA recipe – Ask (Offer), Change the Subject (at least pretend to look the other way), and Pay Attention (did She accept my moving closer?).  Maybe something like…

“I Wonder What I might do to Prepare myself for meeting my Karma head-on.”

Or, using the more audacious Command version (https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava/theta/) because it has the advantage of instant feedback, so we can work in many iterations in a short amount of time…

“God/Goddess, Creator of All That Is, I Command that I meet my Held Emotions Bravely, Lovingly, and Gently.  It Is Done, It is Done, It is Done.  Thank you, God/Goddess.  …(deep Breath)…  Show me.”

The other end of the Opposition to the Stationary asteroid Karma is Asbolus – the sort of Intuition that leads us to Experiences which Create Wisdom.  That’s actually Perfect for dealing with Held Emotions, but remember that our Karma does not Grasp us, we Grasp it.  And, being Conscious, we have Choice.  So we can Choose to Encounter Wisdom Bravely, Lovingly, and Gently, even if – or especially if – we don’t know yet what it is we’re about to Encounter.

Using Theta Commands will give us clues so we can be better Prepared, though when we’re dealing with the Unconscious we always need to Expect Surprises.  Having our Surprises served with sides of Love and Gentleness, and Bravery, will be a boon.  When Theta gives us clues that trigger Emotion (as is likely in this case), don’t forget Tapping and Kegels, and of course Breathing. 

The Sabian Symbol suggests that Shame may be involved, as that’s a frequent Reaction to Nudity.  Shame is one of the most Difficult Emotions, if not the most Difficult Emotion, to stay Present for.  It’s highly skilled at totally overwhelming the Present Moment and the Ego.  We can be Hypnotized just by hearing the name that our Shamers called us.  It would probably behoove to Meditate on every recollection we have of Shame, and maybe include…

“God/Goddess, Creator of All That Is, I Command that I Bravely, Lovingly, and Gently stay Present, Grounded, and Strong when Shame threatens to Arise, and even more so when it actually does Arise.  It Is Done, It is Done, It is Done.  Thank you, God/Goddess.  …(deep Breath)…  Show me.”

Practice it, so you Recognize it instantly and Respond Lovingly to your Self and to the Stress in your Body.  It’s your Karma, it’s not something you haven’t Experienced before.  And you know in advance, if you remember, that this is a Flushback, not a re-enactment.  Karma is a movie.  You’re either in the audience, or sucked into the screen.  Let the Emotions wash over you, but stay in the audience this time, K?  The more you Practice, the Easier it gets.

Fear, Disconnection, Shame

Much Gratitude to a reader who has advised us that Attachment Parenting International has published an interview with Dr. Daniela Sieff on Fear, Disconnection, and Shame, at…

http://theattachedfamily.com/membersonly/?article=understanding-and-healing-emotional-trauma-interview-with-daniela-sieff-phd

Dr. Sieff calls the Lived Reality that results from literally Internalizing Childhood Trauma our “Trauma-World,” characterized by “Perceiving the World through a veil of Fear,” “Disconnecting from aspects of Ourself,” and  an “Identity that becomes interwoven with Shame.”  This Trauma-World is embedded in the “muscles, hormones, nervous system, and brain structure that underlie our Feelings and our ways of Perceiving and Engaging with the World.”  It Lives in our Cells.  In this article and in her book Understanding and Healing Emotional Trauma she nails much of what we usually refer to as Karmic Archetypes, Held Emotions, Abandoned Genius, Limiting Beliefs, and Self-Sabotage.

That’s the view from where we Are, looking backward.  There’s a good chance this view still holds homework for us.

The view looking forward is quite different…

http://suzanneliephd.blogspot.com/2017/05/threshold-to-fifth-dimensions.html

” ‘Where are you?’ you ask in a frustrated manner.  ‘If you are my fifth dimensional guide, why don’t I see you?’

“ ‘You cannot see me anymore than I can see you.  WE are ONE!  Can you see your heart beat?  Can you see your stomach digest, or your nervous system jumping from synapse to synapse?  I, your fifth dimensional self live within you.  In the same manner that I shine out from you.

“Take this sentence into your sleep.  Take this message into your daily life.  Take this message into your meditations and reflections.”

Time for more pirouettes.  Not really pirouettes, nor Semazen, but turning.  When you come out of a room and are about to turn right, instead stop, then turn in place counterclockwise (toward the left) three quarters of a full circle before you step forward.  To turn left, stop, then turn in place clockwise 270 Degrees before you step forward.  You’ll be just a tiny bit dizzy, not uncomfortable, but just a bit Detached from your usual “Reality.” 

When Pluto was in Scorpio, in the late 1980s and early 1990s, “The Way Out Was Through” – that is, we had to jump into the deep end of whatever we were Resisting.  From the mid-nineties to the mid-oughts, Pluto was in Sagittarius, and “The Way Out Was Through Letting Go.”  Now, until 2023, Pluto is in Capricorn – “The Way Out is to Just Do It.”  When we’re Stuck, sure, we’ll Need to go back and Retrieve the part of our Self that we Left Behind. 

Dan Scranton’s Channel today suggests…

“This is a moment for you to look at how far you’ve come, because the experience of your expansion depends upon your acknowledgement of yourself.  If you continue to see only the things that you need to work on, then you’re not going to enjoy the experience.  If you look for areas that need improvement because you think you must in order to make the shift, you’re not going to enjoy the experience.

“If instead you look at yourselves and you recognize how powerful the experience of awakening is, you will take yourselves to the next level joyously.  And this journey that you are on is all about finding the opportunities for joy within it.  It is inevitable that you will make the journey, but how you do it, whether you will go with ease and with joy in your hearts, or whether you struggle and strive and are hard on yourselves, these are the choices that are in front of you.

“Make the choice that supports what it is that you want to experience, both on the remainder of your journey here to the fifth dimension, and also, once you arrive.  Once you arrive, you will still have expanding to do.  So you might as well start enjoying this journey now.”

http://danielscranton.com/how-far-you-have-come-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

Bottom line: as usual, it’s Both/And.

Red Rutile (Titanium Dioxide) Crystals clustered like a fasces, going Both ways on a Matrix of Muscovite (Sodium Aluminum Fluoride) Mica Books going every which way, pirouetting, as is their wont.  Muscovite invites your Higher Self to join “you,” while Rutile sharpens your Attention.