Guilt that Ain’t 2

We got so swept away by Boundaries in the first Guilt that Ain’t post that we forgot to explain the title. Neptune should be Dominating the airwaves here, as it reaches Peak Vibes (Stationary) today 3 December 2022 4:14 pm PST (GMT 12:14 am 4th, IST 5:44 am 4th, AEDT Qld 10:14 am 4th), but I have to Reach to Detect it. Unusual. But as it Stands Still, asteroid Nemesis Merges with it, and we usually associate Nemesis with Guilt. But Neptune is a master of Subterfuge, so we could be Feeling sham Guilt, about things we have no reason to Feel Guilty about for instance. Or Regret that we didn’t follow through on Powerful and Meaningful Actions that would have Evoked Guilt, Inappropriately so in Retrospect. Or recalling places where someone else worked hard to make us Feel Guilty, when they were Power Tripping on us.

The 23 Pisces Degree Reading for the Neptune Station and Nemesis is intriguing – The Profoundly Impossible Search for Missing Soul Fragments When There Are No Clues, and the Miracle that Occurs When We Persevere with Our Intention to Embrace Them. Since we routinely interpret Neptune as Material Confusion and Spiritual Clarity, Neptune might just be trying to Confuse us. In the Neptune Station chart with three Degrees of Sensitivity or Orb, this Mysterious Neptune-Nemesis Energy Debates with a Strong Drive toward Resilience, and is Challenged by a Strong Need to be Aware of and Communicate Our Values.¹

¹ Neptune-Nemesis Debates (Opposes) Ceres-Sisyphus Out of Bounds (Emphasis on Resilience), which is Challenged (T-Squared) by Mercury OOB Merged with (Conjunct) Venus OOB (Emphasis on Awareness and Communication of Our Values). The Mercury-Venus OOB T-Square is Self-Resolving (a Diamond Star), and the root of the Self-Resolving Finger of the Goddess is the Sextile (Grace after Initial Huper Action) between Pan OOB (Spirit of Nature Embodied and Emphasized) and the Stellium (Group of Planets) of Veritas (Truth of the Mind), Black Moon Lilith (Self-Sovereignty), and Pallas OOB and Stationary (Boundaries Front and Center).

The latter, in my World at least, has been about Loosening my Boundaries with “Inanimate” Entities – Trusting Self-Sovereignty when it comes to Rejecting Codependence, but not when it comes to Rejecting Oneness With All. This evening I was cutting up Asparagus and Zucchini (literally, not just Vegetables A-to-Z) to steam when I realized that I needed to Apologize to the Asparagus for Treating Them like They were Inanimate, and then Ask for Their Permission to Merge, which They granted. But then a few minutes later I started cutting up the Courgettes without Remembering to Ask! So I had to apologize to Them and Ask for Their Permission. The Habits of Living Unconsciously Die Hard!

I hadn’t Connected till now that this was an Exercise in Respecting Pan and Becoming Aware of My Values in a Much Deeper Way. Thank you for the Loving and Gentle Teaching, Pan and Neptune! I’ve long been missing this kind of Deep Connection to the Natural World, without Seeing it as a Lost Soul Fragment that I haven’t been Owning! That blows the top of my head off, as I begin to Appreciate that my Muggletude may not be Terminal! What a Wonderful Epiphany!

Golden Barite (Barium Sulfate) is an Ancient Symbol for the Clarity and Integrity of Our Intentions.

Our Chief Astrology Officer has pointed out something we missed, that Mercury Out of Bounds (Emphasis on Communication and Travel) was Opposing Mars Out of Bounds (Emphasis on Action and Passion) on 29-30 November, and observed that such a Dance occurred less often than one would Expect. While the Outer planets like Neptune Strongly Influence our Inner Life, the Inner Planets like Mercury and Mars Strongly Influence our Outer Life and our Day-to-Day Surficial Reality. I did have some travel Challenges last week, which I’m hoping will Self-Resolve once this Energy fades. If I have time, I’ll write about this more before we get to the Full Moon.

The “Easy Button”

Brenda Hoffman nails it today…

https://lifetapestrycreations.wordpress.com/2018/02/05/when-youre-ready-select-the-easy-button/

“Many of you are stalling now because the knowledge that you are powerful enough to create anything is too frightening for you to contemplate.

“We are not chiding you, merely reminding you that you are much more powerful than you yet dare display.

“Many of you have past life traumas associated with displaying your skills in 3D.  So it is you are suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD) as are many who serve in the military or observe violent scenes.

“Such is neither good nor bad, merely how you evaluate your current phase.  Even though you wish to move through this phase rapidly, your reality is like that of a military veteran who fears gunshots whenever a loud noise disrupts his or her being.  Similar to the PTSD experienced by many, your need is beyond someone telling you that all is well.

“You have to discover you are well even though whispers of past fears float by and through your being when you feel the need to actualize your current skillset.

“For many, it is easier to ignore that skillset, for by doing so you are not forced to acknowledge how fearful those past lives were.  A bit like those terrified of 3D water activities discovering, in what you label a past life, one of their segments was forcibly drowned.  Even though that fear is no longer logical, the fear lingers.

“The result is that you are attempting to dislodge those fears from your being, for you feel you must move forward immediately.  Forcing you to be at odds with yourself by encouraging ailments and other means to slow you down.

“Of course, reading this information creates deeper feelings of loss, fear, and internal anger.  ‘Why can’t I just move on?  What’s stopping me?’  As always, the answer is you.  The difference this time is an acknowledgment of that fact.  For clearing issues is different and easier in 5D even though you have not yet grasped that concept.

“Request help from your segments, your council, your guides, or whoever feels most right to you as you read this piece.  You no longer have to live with fears for years or even days.

“Yet, you continue to clear frightening memories with the 3D format that used to be most beneficial for you.

“You merely need to request help in acknowledging and clearing your deeply hidden fears.  You need not rest, stay home, vent, or whatever you think you should do.  All that is required is to ask for help and then allow that help to smooth out your fearful rough edges.

“You no longer are of 3D.  So you do not need to fear others or more importantly, yourself.  For many of you remain concerned that you will say something wrong, react incorrectly, or stand out in some way that encourages others to punish you for your beliefs.

“You have transitioned to personal freedom including your inner voice of rightness.  So you no longer need to sift your words and actions through your cultural sense of rightness.

“You will not be punished for being yourself as you have been in the past.

“But then, you will not believe this until you allow your PTSD to float away, as it will once you ask for assistance.  This clearing consists of two actions.  First, allow yourself to experience and express your PTSD.  Then ask for help in clearing your PTSD easily and effortlessly.  You do not need to be in your home or sanctuary, nor do you need to create illness or exhaustion as you clear this.

“Many of you are so afraid of cultural shame or ostracism that it is easier to hide your true being from even yourself.  A need that is an extension of eons of living in 3D obscurity.

“To discover if you are afraid to let down your personalized PTSD fear barrier, merely ask yourself if you are fully ready to be yourself or if you wish to be of both 3D and 5D.  If you answer that you wish to hide behind 3D convention, it is time for you to reassess how much you wish to live in freedom.

“Most of you had extremely traumatic past life experiences when you attempted to display your true self with true power.  But that was then.  Do you wish to clear those fears or to continue them so you are no longer part of this transition?

“Many of you are quite upset with that last statement for in your mind you have proved over and over again that you wish to be an instrumental part of this transition.  That even though you have a definite role to play and you wish to play that role, those memories are too painful to ignore.  Which is little different from those of you who experienced physical, sexual, and emotional violence in this lifetime.  You have the choice of continuing to slow or stop your development because of that violence or to forge ahead knowing that such is part of your history but not a stopping point.

“You were almost certainly abused in many lifetimes for displaying your Universal powers in a 3D world.  But that was then.  So are you willing to receive help easily and effortlessly by merely requesting it, or do you wish to simmer in your internal fears for a bit longer?  That is your choice.  One that you have always had even though never before has clearing such a dramatic piece been this easy.

“You are in a different place with different skills and a different physical body.  Allow that to be part of your knowingness.  And then, know that fears from the past are no longer required because this is a different time with different needs.

“You are not of 3D, you are a 5D god or goddess who can easily clear that which stops you from being part of this New Earth/Universal tapestry if you so desire.

“But for many that desire is not yet there.  Allow yourself to move at the pace right for you, but know that when you are ready, that piece is easily cleared.

“Compared to your clearings while of 3D, this is a ‘piece of cake.’  The only part stopping you is fear of yourself and how you were treated by others generations, eons, or decades ago.”

Which sounds a lot like an Ego Death, Surrendering our Attachment to Struggling – that would feel like an Easy Button!  So, where is our favorite Ego-Death asteroid, Nemesis?  Remember it’s just finished crossing OR10-Nessus and dredging up our Abuse Histories and Herstories.  Well, looky here…

Neptune (Confusion) is about to Initiate Nemesis; it’ll get there on 12 February (8am PST), just in time for the Atropos Station.  Won’t that be Fun – Ego Death Dancing with Confusion!  Remember though that Confusion is the first stage of Growth, because in order to Grow we need to bust out of the Cage created by our current Concept Set, and our current Concept Set is what makes us Feel Safe, like we’re reasonably certain that the Tigers will be in their cages tonight when we go for our evening constitutional in Watermelon Sugar.

Their Union will be at 14 Pisces, “A Lady wrapped in a large stole of Fox fur: the use of intelligence and mental subtlety as a protection against storms and trials.”  Doesn’t that hit the target – just when we need our “intelligence and mental subtlety for protection,” it’s scheduled to fail.  Which is precisely the point – we’re shifting from intellectual and mental protection to Spiritual Protection, or rather, the Realization that Spirit needs no Protection, it Just Is, Indestructible and infinitely malleable Essence.

A good time to quote Frank Ostaseski…

http://www.dailygood.org/story/1813/frank-ostaseski-lessons-to-the-living-from-the-dying-awakin-call-editors/

“I had a difficult upbringing as a child. I always held up the hope that someday, someone would rescue me. I imagined that I would be saved by love coming toward me, but it was just the opposite.  I was rescued when love came through me.”

“When my son died in a motorcycle accident, I learned what being sick to death actually means.  I cried non-stop for weeks.  On one of those occasions I was outside in my garden.  I couldn’t take a deep breath and felt as if I was having a heart attack.  In a flash I felt something that I can only describe as a crack in my chest.  I could feel the earth moan and sob with me, and for a moment I thought I had lost my mind.  I could feel what all mothers who’ve lost a child feel, and I knew I was not alone in my suffering. 

“Shortly after I read a quote: ‘The heart that is open never breaks.’  In that instant, I believe, my heart was split wide open.  The loss of my son opened me to the suffering of all beings and I felt a strange peace.”

Neptune is a particular kind of Confusion, Confusion about the nature of the 3D World.  Conversely, it also signifies Clarity about the Realm of Spirit.  The Physical, Mental, Spiritual, and Emotional Realms aren’t Realms at all, they’re Perspectives.  Reality is Unitary and Multifarious.  You can use any one of those filters to view it – Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Emotional, and many many others.  Because Reality is All One, we can Heal “Emotional” issues using a Physical frame, and Change the “Physical” World using a Spiritual Perspective.  It’s what Allows Instantaneous Healing – of our Ancient Karmic PTSD, for instance.  The Easy Button!

Neptune also symbolizes Confusion because it represents the Edge between the Personal and the Transpersonal, our Relationship with Everything Larger than Ourself.  If we live in a Hostile World, then Anything Larger than Ourself is a threat.  But Hostility isn’t a property of the World, it’s a property of the Observer.  Another of those many many Perspectives, another filter that we can Choose to see the World through.  Or not.  A good time to re-read Watermelon Sugar.

How does Nemesis-Neptune relate to this week’s Main Effect, the Sedna Station?  Well, obviously Fear and Ego Death go hand in hand.  Otherwise we’d probably just call it Ego Growth.  Which wouldn’t be a bad synonym for Nemesis, actually.  But it’s more direct, as you can see in the gold lines on the chart; Nemesis-Neptune Trioctiles the ends of the Square between Aletheia/Truth and Haumea/Rebirth.  Trioctiles to the ends of a Square form a Mjōlnir or “Hammer of Thor,” signfying Epiphany.  Thor’s Hammer is actually more like Lightning than a Sledge.

We commonly refer to Sedna as representing Fear, but actually she symbolizes our Relationship to Fear.  If you Breathe or do Kegels while Fear is about, you see how Energizing it actually is.  And if you Tap Out your Archetypal Habitual Reactions to it and get Neutral, you see what sort of Response is actually appropriate in the Present Moment, divorced from our Karma.  Even if it’s only Relief, I often find that to be very Joyful.  Excitement, Energy, Joy – Fear is a Sheep in Wolf’s clothing.  Finding the Easy Button would be quite an Epiphany indeed!