Self-Empathy

Reader K says…

“I’m always happy to hear more (and again) about Poor-Sweethearting, Despair, and Miracles.”

This is Chiron stuff.  Most of youalls probably know Chiron as the Wounded Healer, or the Healer with the Unhealable Wound, Unhealable because it was caused by a Poisoned Spear thrown by another Centaur.  The “mental-physical-spiritual-emotional” correlate is the Held Emotions and Toxic chemicals that clog our Microtubules and block our Intuitions.

We put “mental-physical-spiritual-emotional” in quotes because while we’re used to thinking of the Mental and the Physical and the Spiritual and the Emotional (in astrology Air, Earth, Fire, and Water) as different Realms or different “Levels” of our Identity, they’re in fact different Perspectives on our Identity, which is actually Unitary (and of course simultaneously Multifarious). 

For example, if you try to Separate Thoughts from Emotions, you quickly Discover that they’re Circular, each reinforcing the other. 

In post-Boryshenko Medicine, the Mind and Body are so intimately intertwined that it’s counter-productive to try to Separate them. 

Ever seen Prayers work to Heal the Physical?  Body and Spirit are not Separate Entities, they’re just different ways of Seeing the Singular Identity.

The Centaur is half Huper and half Animal, and the Animal half – Horse – is very Strong.  That represents Consciousness and the Unconscious.  Who needs Tortoises and Hares; Imagine trying to outrun a Horse, and you can see how futile it is to try to outsmart the Unconscious.  Its weapons are Toxic, and there is no cure.  Just ask Shakespeare or Oedipus how easy it is to Overpower the Unconscious.  The Classical view is that it’s Hopeless.

We have a whole Technology for addressing the Unconscious – PIAVA we call it, for Prayer-Intention-Asking-Visualizing-Affirming – and it’s Magnetic or Indirect, not Dynamic or Direct.  It’s about Asking, not Telling (https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/manifestation/piava-review/), though there’s a special case for “Commanding.” 

Our aim here of course is to help us all Grow our Consciousness to include more of what is now Unconscious or Semi-Conscious.  On the Personal level (or Perspective), we refer to this as our Karma, Habits, Patterns, Archetypes, especially those that are Self-Sabotaging. 

There are Cultural levels as well; for instance, in the Midwestern US, it’s Culturally appropriate to be “Nice” instead of Honest, which can make a big dent in our Authenticity.  With enough repetition, we’re unable to tell what’s really Authentically us, and what’s been Programmed into the Unconscious.  Since Manifesting What We Want often requires Authenticity, that’s important.  We see the same process happening in the Culture’s Programming of women and minorities as inferior.

So, this notion that we’re Unhealably Slaves to our Karma and to the Unconscious, doesn’t fit with our goal of Growing our Consciousness.  Fortunately, there is a Savior to Rescue us, named Empathy.  Eugene Gendlin, of “Focusing” fame, studied a number of psychotherapeutic methods to see if any worked better than the others.  He found that method didn’t much matter; what mattered was whether the therapist was Empathetic.  Empathy Heals.

And does Empathy Heal the Unhealable?  Absolutely. 

We use a very simple process to Initiate Empathy – we say to ourself, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Unhappy, aren’t you.”  Or, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’ve been Wounded by a Poison Spear, haven’t you.”  Or even, “You Poor Sweetheart, you were really Helpless against your uncle’s Abuse, weren’t you.” 

There’s no exclamation mark, your voice drops at the end of the sentence, as if you were trying to comfort your best friend.  It’s not quite a Question, but say it tentatively enough that your friend (or in this case, “you”) can correct you.  “No, it wasn’t my uncle, it was my stepfather.”  “No, I’m not Unhappy, I’m Terrified.”  “No, Silly, not a Poison Spear, I Twisted my Ankle.”  You won’t always get an answer, but sometimes you will, and when you do, it’s Powerful.

Folks say it’s okay to talk to yourself, but when you answer, you’re on the Edge.  Yes, the Edge of Healing.  If a part of you Responds to your Poor-Sweetheart, and you can strike up a Conversation, that’s a Big Step toward bringing important parts of the Unconscious into your Consciousness.  Fritz Perls developed a whole School or Psychology around this process.

We refer to it as the Unconscious rather than our Unconscious because the Unconscious isn’t entirely Personal.  If we View it as partially Personal (Karmic, for instance), that’s useful, but it’s just a Perspective. 

If you were able to shift your Identity to include not just your Ego but also the Unconscious, you’d instantly Grok what’s meant by We Are All One.  It doesn’t really make sense to our Mentality, because it’s not Either/Or, and the mind knows only Duality.

You don’t need a Response to your Poor-Sweetheart from some hidden part of yourself.  In fact, if you just Change the Subject – do something else and forget about what you just did, that’s when Miracles will occur.

Let’s say you Notice that you’re Discouraged.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re really Discouraged, aren’t you.”  Then you do something else, preferably something that takes your Attention off of what you were thinking about or Feeling before you Poor-Sweethearted yourself.  You can still Feel Discouraged, but be Discouraged about something else.

A Day or so later, look to see what you’re Feeling.  I predict you won’t be Discouraged any more.

The poster child for Poor Sweethearing is Despair.  The Unhealable Healer is in Despair because he’s unable to see outside of his Despair.  There’s a whole World outside of his Despair, but he doesn’t know it because he can’t See it.  We’re in Despair when we no longer believe that What We Want is possible.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Despair, aren’t you.”

You’re doing something similar when you Tap Out your Unpleasant or Overwhelming Feelings.  You start by phrasing the Truth about the Emotion that you’re actually Feeling.  Then you Balance your Meridians, which Changes everything.  All Dis-Ease is just a symptom of being Out of Balance.  Balance is Ease.

Poor-Sweethearting is about Identity.  When “I am Feeling Despair,” that’s a statement of Identity.  You – your State of Being – and Despair are Merged.  Short of Enlightenment, we can’t step out of Identity.  But we can Change our Identity. 

When we step outside of our Despairing self, look back at who we were Identified with, and say Compassionately, “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Feeling Despair, aren’t you.” then we no longer are Despair, we’re now Identified with Compassion instead.  There’s the part of ourself that is/was Identified with Despair, and now we’ve created a new part of ourself that’s Identified with Compassion.  And you-as-Despair is now history, while you-as-Compassion is now Present Moment.

This sounds like a grammatical trick, but it’s not.  It’s a trick of Identity.  Once you’re Identified with Compassion, the walled-in World of Despair is no longer your World.  There are any number of new Possibilities that didn’t exist when you were in Despair.  This is the Miracle.  You’ve just Manifested the Possibility of things that were inconceivable in your previous Despairing World.  Miracles are just things that are routine in other Realities than the one you’re in.

Because of the depth of our Beliefs in the Illusion that the Physical World is Substantial and the other Worlds are relatively Insubstantial (there are Subcultures for whom each of the other three Perspectives are Substantial), and because this Illusion is Enforced so adamantly by Western Culture, it may take a lot of Practice to go from “I am Sick” to “You Poor Sweetheart, you Feel Sick, don’t you” to “I am Healthy.” 

It’s by no means impossible.  We could certainly do it in 5D, if we ever slipped out of 5D long enough to “be Sick.”  But we need to start small and build up our Belief that Poor-Sweethearting really works before we can shift our Identity so profoundly.  As Steven Levine used to say, “Don’t start with the 300-pound weight.”

The dwarf planet Chiron is the fulcrum around which our cup – half full or half empty – is measured.  At the turn of the current Century, Chiron was Initiated by Pluto in 12 Sagittarius, “A flag turning into an Eagle turning into a Rooster saluting the Dawn”: Narrow Identity turning into Broad Perspective turning into Enlightenment.  This is a 70-year Cycle.  The Energy “becomes Mainstream” (the Waxing Square) around 2030.

Chiron is now 66 Degrees ahead of Pluto; that’s two elevenths of the way ’round the Zodiacal loop.  A Decile is one tenth and an Unx is one twelfth, but I can’t find an English word that means one eleventh.  So we’ll have to Create one.  The German word for eleven is elf, so we’ll refer to two elevenths as a Bielfin Angle.  The Eleventh Harmonic symbolizes Strength, Lustre, Creativity, and the Second Harmonic Ritual.

This is fitting.  We have our Compulsion (Pluto) to convert Pain into Miracles (Chiron) on the road to Enlightenment by adopting a Ritual (Poor-Sweetheart) for Restoring our Strength and Creativity (Bielfin), and making us Shine again.

Ritual is dangerous, because it eventually morphs into Limiting Beliefs, especially when it’s passed down to new generations that weren’t involved in its formulation and so come to see it as “just the way the World Is.”  We’re not Swearing an Oath to uphold Poor-Sweetheart, so it’s a Both/And, not an Either/Or, so there’s some hope there that it won’t create a Cult.

Ritual is like any other Habit; it should be Consciously tested occasionally to see what alternatives there are, and to see if we’re actually Choosing the most appropriate alternative for the Situation at hand.