Archive for the ‘Abuse’ Category

Abundance Breakthrough New Moon

November 24, 2019

The most important Energy that bathes us for the next several days is Neptune – Material Confusion but Spiritual Clarity (Neptune Stationary).  That Energy increases through 27 November 2019 (4:30 am PST) and then diminishes.  That’s probably more important to remember than anything else we say about the 26 November (7am PST) New Moon, because that’s the context in which the New Moon occurs, and it’s terribly relevant to the New Moon chart.

We also need to recognize that at 5 Sagittarius the New Moon occurs in the same Degree Zone as the Abuse Patterns that the last week has been Encouraging us to Terminate.  The New Moon sits in between the Degrees of the Invasive Memories (Stationary OR10, 21 Nov.) Energy and the Choosing to End Patterns We Don’t Like (Stationary Atropos, 22 Nov.) Energy that still linger from last week (they’re both still moving very slowly, even though they’re past their Stations).

Last week (till 22 November) we were using a dozen Degrees of Sensitivity (4-9 Degrees ±3) because there were three planets very Strong (Stationary) in that Zone at almost the same time, so we couldn’t Separate their Energies.  This week (till 27 November) we have only one event in this space (the Neptune Station is at 16 Degrees), the New Moon, so our Sensitivity is much less (5 Degrees ±3).  Thus, this week the whole Abuse and Privilege (Stationary Nessus, 21 Nov., at 9 Degrees) thing that we were working with last week, is technically over, though barely.  But if you aren’t finished Letting Go Of Abuse Memories – which could be yours or someone else’s – they’ll have a Big Impact on the New Moon Energy as well.

I don’t Believe anyone ever actually “finishes” Letting Go Of Abuse, we’re just Always In Recovery.  We get Conscious of it, we Honor and Embrace the Held Emotions as they arise, we gradually Accept that it was a Challenge that we Endured and Learned from, we Accept that we aren’t Alone and that it has been going on for Millennia to more people that we can Imagine, and even though we have made a Commitment that It Stops Here and look forward to a World Without It in 5D, we know that it’s unrealistic to Expect that Huperity will Change overnight.  Where there is Privilege there is Abuse.

We usually consider New and Full Moon Energies to be Strong for at least two weeks.  We’re about to say that the primary Challenge in the New Moon Energy is an Opportunity to Let Go Of our historical and herstorical Blocks to Abundance and Security (it’s more complicated than just this, but the New Moon chart features a T-Square to Pholus-Quaoar-Venus-Ceres from Atropos Opposite Sappho-Makemake, abetted by a Neptune-Station T-Square to the Moon from Neptune Opposite Orcus).  Remember that Abundance means Having Enough to Share.  This is Big, so Listen Closely.

To summarize, during the next few weeks we have to be Mindful to Focus on the Spiritual, not the Material (Neptune).  We have to Be Open to Possibly Painful Emotions, Fully Embrace them, and Be Willing to Let Them Go (Nessus et al).  We have to Let Go of Victimhood and Recognize that “We” (not our Current Ego, but some version of “Us”), on some long-forgotten occasion for some long-forgotten reason, “signed up” for it (Orcus), and take Full Responsibility (Pholus) for Changing it.  If that last part is odious to you, you’re reading the wrong blog.

Your best bet is undoubtedly to Meditate on What You Want, being careful to Focus on the Outcome you Want, while carefully Avoiding Focusing on the Methods or Mechanisms, especially Methods or Mechanisms that you think might produce What You Want.  You can’t Manifest Miracles in the Future while dwelling on what hasn’t worked in the Past.  It’s especially important to be Aware of when you’re Focusing on Beliefs that it’s not Possible, or that it will never Happen For You, and Interrupt those Negative Thoughts.  Do Ask yourself Who is telling you that and when those Thoughts started though, so you can Revert their Curse.

Abuse Week IV

November 21, 2019

A visiting Angel disguised as an electroblast from the Sun, over Norway…

https://spaceweather.com/archive.php?view=1&day=21&month=11&year=2019

We’re now deep in the grip of three separate “Stations,” or times when the influence of a planet is particularly Strong.  The three Stationary planets are

  • Dwarf planet OR10, which doesn’t have an official name yet even after a dozen years since its discovery.  It’s about Intrusive Memories, generally (though not always) what we’re more Comfortable Forgetting.  21 November 2019 (noon PST) in 4 Pisces.
  • Dwarf planet Nessus, which is about Abuse and Privilege.  Abuse occurs only when the Perp feels Privileged, which allows them to regard their Victim as Less Than in some way.  Does Abuse always follow from Privilege?  Not always, but if you want to Learn more about Abuse, start by looking at Privilege.  It might Ask you to reconsider your definition of Abuse – for instance, isn’t Homelessness a direct result of the Privilege embedded in our Culture’s Worship of Hoarding Wealth, which in turn is partially caused by the Abusiveness of our Culture’s Failure to Embrace Unconditional Community?  21 November (4:30 pm PST) in 9 Pisces.
  • Asteroid Atropos, which is about the Ending of TimeLines, where a TimeLine can be a Lifetime, a Habit, a Relationship, a job, a place to Live, or any episode in one’s Life.  Atropos is especially active in Ending Karmic Patterns.  Most of us Experience Karma as if it was Fate, but if we can bring it into Consciousness, we can convert it to Choice instead.  22 November (2pm PST) in 7 Aries.

The Locations of the three Stations, only a few Degrees apart, and their Timing at only one day apart, tell us to Interpret all three as One Energy – we most likely won’t be able to Tell the three Energies apart.  Fortunately, the Energy is overwhelmingly Positive, so set your Intention that any Abuse Memories that arise Are Being Healed and Let Go Of (I avoid the term Release because I don’t want the Unconscious to think I want to Re-new my Lease).

The overall chart is Complex…

…so we’ll break it into more manageable chunks.  Even though it’s benevolent in this case, we’ll stick to our usual habit of starting with the Challenge (T-Square).  This first chunk, below, is not just Self-Resolving (Diamond Square), but also a Dumb-Luck Blessing (Grand Trine).  It’s all about the Life Force (Varuna)

Since Hidden Emotional Gunk underlies most or possibly all Physical Discomfort, if we Allow our Abuse Memories (no matter how we Perceive them) to be about Letting Go, we’re likely to Manifest Significant and potentially Miraculous Physical Healing.  Also, since our Abuse of our Home Planet is the direct result of Denying the Life Force and Consciousness of Earth’s multifarious plenitudes of Non-Human and even Inanimate Denizens, we could see a major Tripping Point in Earth Repair as well

Looks like a spaceship jetting toward Good Health and Vitality (Varuna), don’t it?

The second chunk is about a Huge Leap forward (Diamond Star and Grand Cross) in Grokking what we are actually Capable of Accomplishing (Moon-Juno-Makemake-Sappho) and Taking Responsibility for (Pholus-Quaoar-Ceres-South Node)

Not to mention Abandoning our Victimhood (Atropos-Chiron Opposite the Makemake Stellium).

Which leaves the jumble below, the most coherent piece of which advises us that Facing the Truth about Abuse and Choosing otherwise would be an excellent road for us to follow (Finger of God to Aletheia-Veritas-Sun-Pallas, which Squares the OR10 and Nessus Stations)

Plus the suggestion that, Evoking our Life Mission – without trying to Define It! (Quincunx) – will aid that process greatly (OR10-Nessus Square Aletheia Stellium Quincunx North Node Trine OR10-Nessus Tricolor).

A second suggestion also pops out – that we use Prayer or Intention or Intuition or other process of Focusing on our Desired Outcome (PIAVA – Quincunx) rather than Planning and Executing a Defined Methodology (PDSA or the equivalent) to determine the Actions we’ll take to Abandon our Victimhood (North Node Square Atropos-Chiron Quincunx Mars Trine North Node Tricolor).

Finally, we have a potentially Huge Blessing (Almost Grand-Sextile) which we can put into Action by simply Persisting in our Efforts, and Recognizing that our Journey is a Spiral – when we Return to a Place where we’ve been Before, it’s not an indication that we haven’t made progress, because in the interim We Have Changed.  So even if our Abuse Memories Feel as Painful as before, We Have Become More Conscious, and if we think about it for a moment we’ll Realize that we’re now able to Embrace our Wounded Self more Lovingly than before, and that is a Giant Leap forward (the Vacancy is 6 Virgo, “A merry-go-round”)!

If we can find the time, we’ll flesh these out more in subsequent posts…

Abuse Week II

November 18, 2019

An excellent example of Abuse and Privilege on the national scale…

https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/homeless/more-seattleites-are-housing-homeless-people-in-their-backyards-but-its-happening-slowly/

Abuse Week 1

November 18, 2019

Remember a while back when the symbol for Abuse and Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus) was crossing the symbol for Invasive Memories (dwarf planet OR10) and we were very busy Enduring, and hopefully, Letting Go of lots of old Abuse Memories?  (See https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/category/cycles/nessus-or10/.)  We get big-time flashbacks this week, as both of these dwarf planets are Strong (Stationary) on the same day again.  Fortunately, the symbol for Ending TimeLines (asteroid Atropos) is also Strong this week; that should help.  The schedule looks like this…

Up until 11am PST 20 November 2019 – Mercury (Communication, Analysis) turns Direct at 12 Scorpio.  We usually pretty much ignore Mercury because a primary thesis of ours is that the more frequently astroevents recur, the more practice we have with them, and the more Routine is our Experience of them – and Mercury does most everything frequently.  But this event stands out because Mercury has been Dancing in Scorpio (Diving Deep to Get to the Bottom of Things) at the same time as the Truth Twins (asteroids Aletheia and Veritas) were Diving Deep.

The Mercury Station chart very much introduces Abuse Week, as the symbol for Abuse and Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus) and that for Making Emotional Decisions (the Moon Merged with dwarf planet Orcus) are Challenged (Squared) by the symbol for Beginning New TimeLines (asteroid Klotho).  Meanwhile our Lifetime Template (the Nodal Axis) is Challenged by the need to Confront our Fate (asteroid Moira) and our Codependence (dwarf planet Hylonome).

On the plus side of the ledger, there is Great Emotional Grace available to us (Mercury-Nessus-North Node Water Grand Trine).

Up until noon PST 21 November, the symbol for Intrusive Memories (dwarf planet OR10) is Strong (Stationary) in 4 Pisces.

Up until 4:30 pm PST 21 November, the symbol for Abuse and Privilege (dwarf planet Nessus) is Strong (Stationary) in 9 Pisces.

Up until 2pm PST 22 November, the symbol for Ending Timelines (asteroid Atropos) is Strong (Stationary) at 7 Aries.

In addition to being close together in Time, these four Stations are all within a few Degrees of each other, at 4, 7, 9, and 12 Degrees.  That means we’re likely to Experience them as All One Event.  If we’ve been practicing at Becoming Conscious of our Karma so we can Choose Different Habits – as the astrology has been coaching us to do since at least the End of Time As We Know It and the Uranus-Pluto Square in 2012 – we can look forward to saying a final Goodbye to some old unpleasant Habits of being “in the wrong place at the wrong time” and getting Abused for it.

And if we’ve been practicing at Becoming Conscious of our Karma so we can Choose Different Habits, we can also look forward to getting Called Out on some old pleasant Habits of being in a position of Power and practicing Privilege.  Whenever you Exercise Privilege, someone else receives Abuse.

If we have NOT been practicing at Becoming Conscious of our Karma, we may well find ourselves in a “last straw” situation, “blowing up” at being Abused again, and finally setting a solid Boundary to prevent its recurrence.  Bravo!  May you be Bulletproof and Bullyproof!

And similarly, if we have NOT been practicing at Becoming Conscious of our “Good” (favorable to our Ego, that is) Karma or Privilege, we may find ourselves seriously shot down for Unconsciously Abusing someone.  These days that can have serious repercussions on our Reputation, Career, Relationships, and even Criminal Status.

For instance, the Billionaire Class is coming under fire for their Sociopathic Avarice these days.  Till recently they’ve been treated as if they were Gods.  The Occupy Movement and its Identification of the rest of us as “the 99%” was a necessary start, but you saw how quickly it faded into Obscurity.  This time may be more lasting.  Even some of the Billionaires are calling for a Jubilee.

Racism may be becoming more obvious as well.  A few years ago the media, the NFL, and the government conspired to take a protest against Open Season for the police to shoot to kill young black men, and Spin it into “disrespect for the flag.”  Masterful as PR, but unspeakably Evil as public or quasi-public policy, and as “journalism.”  Colin Kaepernick is becoming more visible again, with a public workout this last weekend.  Maybe there will be forward motion on Privilege and Abuse.

More on these themes and charts as the week progresses.

Karma Repair 5

May 21, 2019

A friend of mine recently intended to say “I’m Hungry” and it came out as “I’m Angry” – that’s how Subtle these Energies are.  They’re Opportunities; often our Karma is a lot more In-Our-Face, and it will be again if we continue to pass on the Subtle Opportunities.

Here’s the chart for the 23 May (5pm PDT) Station of Orcus in 10 Virgo, drawn in the lighter lines.  The heavier lines show the closely related 19 May Merger of Saturn with the Mean South Node in 21 Capricorn (see the previous Karma Repair posts)…

You can see that the T-Square (red triangle) containing Orcus is focused on asteroid Ceres (which would be called “Cup-Hook” if we named planets after their glyphs).  In other words, the main issue here is Sustainability.  Not just Can We Let Go of Our Karma, but also Can We Continue to Choose Otherwise?

The third corner of this T-Square triangle is dwarf planet Nessus – Abuse and Privilege.  So it’s not just Letting Go of Our Karma, it’s Permanently Letting Go of Abuse, which means Naming it what it is, and Setting Firm Boundaries around it.  And yes, asteroid Pallas (Boundaries – the diamond on a cross) is involved, in a very positive way (a Quincunx Bridge – green lines – across the Orcus-Nessus Opposition; a Quincunx Bridge means it’s Grace unless we try to Anal-yze it).

But who is this Orcus fellow?  He was a pre-Roman Etruscan God-figure whose job was to Punish Oath-Breakers.  Strikes Terror, eh?  How many times have we been threatened with Dire Consequences if we Break an Oath?  The Yangtegrity Patriarchy made a big deal of Oaths, but hereabouts we lean more toward Yintegrity, as does our 5D future.  Oaths are spawn of Duality, and we prefer to Relate to the Universe as Unitary and Multifarious.  It’s the Limited mind that has great difficulty getting past Either/Or Duality.  When we aren’t In the Flow and Living Intuitively, then Yangtegrity is useful.  But it keeps us in 3D; Either/Or is Political, Both/And is Spiritual.

It turns out that our Unconscious Limiting Beliefs have their roots in forgotten Oaths that we made a long time ago, often in other Lifetimes.  The All-or-Nothing, Unconditional nature of Oaths is a side-effect of Duality.  The rest of Life is Situational.  We don’t Vow never to cross the street, we Vow to look both ways and cross only when it’s Safe – we use the “rule” if it fits the Situation; if it doesn’t fit, we look for Alternatives.  One way to interpret the impact of Ceres in this T-Square, is that it Invites us to Let Go of our Unconditional Oaths – the last thing we want to do is Sustain our Self-Sabotage!

With Nessus involved, we have to consider examples involving Abuse.  When Uncle Andy violated us and warned that they’d kill Mom if we told anyone, of course we Vowed never to tell.  And of course we Forgot it, because we worked our butt off to Forget the whole Trauma.  So how does that Vow impact our Lives now?  What if we PIAVAed to Open up that Wound so we could Let it Go?  Would this Vow prevent that Opening from happening?  It would probably do its best to try.  Meanwhile, what Experiences does the Vow prevent us from Indulging?

Unfortunately, the Unconscious often agitates for its own Clearing.  So we may be attracted to Abusers, or to the Abused, and we may have difficulty Breaking this “Habit” until we Clear the origin.  We may not Trust other people, or we may need to keep them at a Distance.  We may have to deal with Suffocation issues that aren’t really “ours.”  These Limits may interfere with What We Really Want out of Life – our Souls are more than clever enough to set up Life circumstances where the only way we can get what we Want most is to Confront our Limits.  That’s the nature of the Nodal Axis.

But, the Orcus-Nessus Opposition (Reverting Oaths involving Abuse or Privilege) is also Bridged by blue lines, or Grace (the Trine Bridge to asteroid Nemesis, which symbolizes Ego Death). Ego Death doesn’t need to be Traumatic, though it depends on our Beliefs about how much of our Life is critically Dependent on that particular Ego.  But Trust me, there are a thousand other potential Egos waiting in the wings to take over, and most of them will do a fine job.

The Egos that won’t do a fine job, will connect you to ancillary issues that you also need to Clear in order to Liberate yourself.  You can even Modulate the pace of your Ego-Clearing – all you need to do is Ask.  “God/Goddess, please lead me Lovingly, Gently, Rapidly, and Completely through the process of Liberating myself from Abuse Memories and any resulting Oaths I (or a former Incarnation) may have made as a result,” for instance.  This is a Trine Bridge, it’s the Easy Path around the difficulty.  Asking for What You Want is a fabulous way to Accept Grace.

Gifts 1a

February 20, 2019

A reader writes…

“The last paragraph [of the Gifts 1 post] points to what I see as an impossible question: how can I have permission to be who I really am?  Certainly I cannot change all of society, that is ridiculous.  Yet, I do see myself as a victim of this scenario.  While interacting with others, I find that if I am to be fully honest, I pour out all of my pain and victimhood in an elaborate and epic story, which then only inevitably leads to more suffering.

“So my only choices are Be an Imposter, or Share my Truth that I am Experiencing as Pain.

“I try to ‘switch the channel’ but I have so much trouble keeping it there.  It makes my mood swings so bad sometimes that I exhaust myself and end up feeling quite hopeless.

“I would like to know how we can remedy this and receive Permission to Be Who we Really Are.  I am PIAVAing the question, and trying not to think about the answer while keeping myself distracted, which has been leading to the Impostor thing.

“At least I know that I am not alone in this and that there are others who are working on these same issues.”

You can say that again (that you aren’t alone in this)!

If there’s a Re-evaluation Counseling (“RC,” often called Co-Counseling) group in your area (https://www.rc.org/), that might be a good place to start; it’s a peer-counseling program that not only tries to give its peers the Opportunity to Practice being Themselves, but also aims to change “all of society.”

The Permission of course comes from yourself, not from outside, but it sounds like you’ve already given yourself this Permission, but you just haven’t found it satisfying, if I’m hearing you okay.  Those of us who never Received that Permission from outside when we were kids, are in the position where part or parts of our Personality are Frozen at the age when our Repression began or peaked.

At their age, there’s no Question that they were Victims, and giving our Inner Little One Permission to Indulge their Victimhood all day long is an important step.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you were seriously Victimized, weren’t you.  Do you want to talk about it?”  You may or may not be able to open a Dialog with your Inner Little One, but Letting them know that you’re Available and Willing to Listen to them is a big step.  This also establishes the Habit of Recognizing that your Little One and your Present Moment Self are not the same, and that’s a very important step.

When we crack open the door to the closet where that Little One still hides, we have to deal with a Personality of that age, which is usually difficult.  You can Practice talking about “Her” or “His” Feelings as distinct from Your Present-Moment Self’s Feelings.  A common syndrome that arises from Child Abuse is that the resulting Adult often Channels the Abused Little One without the Adult Recognizing that they’re Regressed.  If that Energy gets directed at someone who’s not actually Abusing the Adult in the Present Moment, it raises havoc with the Present-Moment Relationship.

I’m not a professional at this practice, but I have some Experience.  The World is a big place, and somewhere, quite possibly somewhere nearby, there are people, maybe more than one, who would Give you Permission to be your True Self, often with the Condition that you Reciprocate.  Hence, RC, as an example.  You could PIAVA to encounter one or more of them.  Non-Violent Communication (“NVC”) is also a possibility (https://www.cnvc.org/), but its program is more formulaic (though no less valuable) and hence harder to get fluent with.

One of the things that NVC (and Eugene Gendlin, as in Focusing) teaches is that Abuse emphasizes Duality, and we come out of it seeing the World as “black and white.”  So when given the Opportunity to Express our True Self, we hand the mic to our Abused Little One and Let it Go without Abandon.  We don’t see any Alternatives to Complete Repression and Complete Expression.  But there are a thousand stages in between, and we can Practice them.  Carefully distinguishing between the Present Moment and our Little One’s Experience, will Reveal many of them.

The point is, like anyone and especially any Little One, you need Practice.  For the first while you’ll see yourself (as others may or may not) as a babysitter’s Nightmare.  So you need a Safe Place to Let that happen.  Once you do you’ll be Surprised at how fast your Little One matures.  But, you’ll have a huge backlog of Self-Judgment, because that’s probably the only way you could keep your Little One Safe when She or He really was Little.

So you need to PIAVA, and thoroughly Train yourself, to Notice Self-Judgment as soon as possible when it arises – if it ever naps.  Part of Being and Expressing your True Self is Noticing and Expressing your Self-Doubt.  The faster you can Express that, even if just to yourself, the less you’ll Reinforce the Negative Patterns.  The process is about Noticing and Changing Self-Judging Habits, and replacing then with Self-Appreciating Habits.  And simply Noticing (and of course Reverting) a Self-Judgment is a Powerfully Self-Appreciating Habit!

Eventually you’ll stop beating yourself up for repeating a Negative Pattern, and start Congratulating yourself for Noticing that you’re repeating a Negative Habit.  This is a Virtuous Spiral, because each time you Notice, you’re likely to Notice Sooner next time, and the Sooner you Notice, the Easier it becomes.  We can climb out of a Karmic dungeon surprisingly quickly using this strategy.

And of course there’s again Poor Sweetheart.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Judging Yourself, aren’t you.”  Even if you Poor-Sweetheart yourself every three minutes all day long, I don’t think you’ll Regret it.

The best book I’ve ever encountered about Recovery from Abuse is Ellen Bass and Laura Davis’s The Courage to Heal.  It’s old (though since revised), but it arises from the Pluto-in-Scorpio 1980s when The Way Out Was Through and Recovery was at the tip of everyone’s minds.  Everybody who was Anybody anyway.

Ultimately we’re looking at Identity.  Who Am I Right Now? is always a good Question to Ask ourself, and the corollary “How Old Am I?” is even better.  If the Answer you get isn’t your actual current age, then you’ve stumbled into a Goldmine of Information about your Karma and Habits.  Switch your Identity to the Present Moment (for example, grasp any Physical Object) and sit down for a good long Interview with the person who Answered your Question.

As I’ve often suggested, the best book in the World about Identity – and about Ego Death, which is now so, and so Appropriately, Popular – is Steven Levine’s Who Dies? That book should be required reading for Everyone.  Steven’s other books also Explore Identity incisively, but Who Dies? is in a class of its own.  I bawled my eyes out all the way through it.

Plus, with the Ancestors now slithering out of their Dens and roaming the Planet, our Self-Judgments and particularly our Lethal Self-Judgments, are going to be on the tip of their tongues, and if we’re not Skilled on the Boundary issues that are so Lit Up recently, and don’t notice that it’s not our own Inner Tongue speaking, then we’re going to be dumped directly into Ego Death, aka Shame, aka Worthlessness, aka Hopelessness, aka Despair.

The Ancestors could even include the Souls of your historical Abusers, and just because they’re Dead (if they are) doesn’t mean that they’re any more Advanced than when they were Alive.  You could be Hearing their hissed “If you tell anyone I’ll kill your Mother” threats without Realizing that this is what’s Triggering the Present-Moment Feelings that aren’t really your Adult’s, but belong to a full-fledged Regression.  And which never really were your own to begin with.

It occurred to me recently that Shame and Pride would be good synonyms for Abuse and Privilege when Nessus is Lit Up – as it is in next week’s chart that we began discussed in Gifts 1.  But “A whole new (Klotho) and very Deep (Sun) Belief System (Vesta) about Abuse (Nessus)” is an incredible Opportunity.  Have I Inspired any of that here?

I’ll be otherwise engaged for the next few days.  Hang in there!

Self-Judgment and Self-Love II

January 15, 2019

Of course the “good news” of a Nemesis Station Square Nessus-OR10 (Ego Death from Embracing or Poor-Sweethearting our Intrusive Abuse Memories), is that it’s an Opportunity to Clear the very Held Emotions that constitute our Unconscious Resistance to migrating into 5D, aka What We Want.  It’s not as complicated as it sounds.  Originally, we set Boundaries against Memories that would Trigger Emotions that would Overwhelm us.

As we got good at this through Repetition, we pushed the Memories and their Emotions out of our Awareness and into Karma.  We made them Unconscious, which means they’re part of Not-Me.  In Real Life we’re Infinite Light Beings Fantasizing a Material Vehicle, and from this Light-Being Perspective nothing is Not-Me.  But when we Identify with our Fantasy Material (/Emotional/Intellectual) Vehicle, then from that Perspective our Not-Me can get Overwhelmingly large, large enough to Take Control of our Vehicle behind its back, without telling us, so to speak – Out of Our Awareness.

This is the Origin of all the Good-Versus-Evil stories you’ve been taught since Birth; “Good” is your Fantasy-Vehicle Identity, and “Bad” is the Not-Me which is the rest of your Light Being, which you don’t recognize as “Me.”  Hence the Classic Warfare Model of HisStory.  His many Stories become Religions or other Group-Thinks like Make-Rome-Great-Again aka Bring-Back-the-Slaves, which the pathologically clever among us exploit for their own Gain.

Moving into Identifying with our Light Body is not a process of Struggle, but a process of Surrender or Allowing or Vulnerability – HerStory.  The Lady Warrior Archetype misses the point, but it’s an intermediate step that might help with our Liberation, if we don’t get Stuck in it.

As we attempt to return our Identity to our Infinite Light Beingness, we find that our Fantasy-Vehicle Identity has to Break Out of a series of Shells, each one Opening us to a “new” (Revealed – Eris) segment of our Not-Me, which Manifests as an Introduction to a Held Emotion (South Node or Karma).  With each Broken Shell our Me Grows toward our 5D Light Being, and our Me Grows in Power – in the sense that we now have greater Healthy Control over our Life Circumstances.

Not the Power-Over which dominates HisStory, but the Power-With that works through Collaboration with the Unseen.  The more we can Delegate Power to the Unseen Energies that actually Carry it, the Easier our Life becomes.  Except of course for the potentially unpleasant “Ego Deaths,” or Molts, or Rebirths, or Embracing/Poor-Sweethearting of our Held Emotions, that occur when one of those Shells Break, because we Experienced those Shells as Security to our Fantasy Vehicle.  Like when Nemesis Acts Out, such as Now through 17 January.

Not to Lament, as Sappho (Self-Love) is also Stationary here, through 20 January.  Unconditional Self-Love is so Central to our Light-Being Self that we’re hardly Aware of it.  While Nemesis can suck out the Air that our Fantasy Vehicle likes to Breathe, nothing can suck out the Light that our Light-Being Self Breathes, though the Illusions of our Fantasy Vehicle like to blind us to that in its misguided attempts to Protect the next Shell.

When we can Experience the Breaking of a Shell as Liberation of a more Power-With-ful Me instead of the demise of a more Limited Power-Over-ful Me, our Growth into Full Collaboration with the Universe has Arrived.  Contrary to the usual Metaphor, there are no Destinations here; there are only More Shells to Break.  5D is not an event, it’s a process, and it’s the process of Enjoying Ego Death.

So let’s have a look at this Opportunity to Experience some serious Ego Deaths in the context of serious Self-Love…

For instance, there’s Marilyn Raffaele’s Channeling for 13 January…

http://www.onenessofall.com/newest.html

(If you don’t find the 13 January 2019 message there, check http://www.onenessofall.com/archives.html.)

“We are the Arcturian Group, a collective of ascended Arcturian beings from the eighth dimension here to assist Gaia and her people during these times of ascending consciousness.

“Know that these messages as well as others that may resonate with you are in reality your own state of consciousness manifesting as the particular message.  If this were not true, you would not be drawn to or be able to understand them.

“You, who are spiritually prepared to expand beyond the illusion and integrate truth are the forefront of the ascension process.  You chose to be on earth during these times of intense energetic chaos and change in order to complete your own third dimensional spiritual journey and become the first wave of ascension and example for those following.

“You are preparing the way for those of the second wave–individuals spiritually ready to awaken but who until now have resisted doing so.  Know that the Light of so many now awakening out of three dimensional sleep state, is shifting and dissolving the old paradigm, even when things appear to be getting worse.  Try not to give up hope but rather stand back as an observer for you are soon going to see much that will restore the hope you may have lost.

“You serve as living breathing examples of unconditional love for those around you when you realize and begin to live out from a consciousness that knows unconditional love is the only reality and that anything else simply represents conditioned beliefs about love.”

“Unconditional love can only ever be all there is because there is only ONE–one substance, one life, one reality, one law.  Love is the energetic glue connecting everything within this Infinite ONE and those who [naively] continue to believe in and live out from a consciousness of separation and duality create for themselves the illusory forms of these beliefs.

“You can ignore, but never change the reality of Oneness by judging from outer appearances as proof of its nonexistence.  Continuing to hold to the third dimensional belief system after outgrowing it only delays a person’s spiritual evolution because Oneness is the foundation of all reality and must be acknowledged at some point.  For some it may be in a future life, for you it is now.

“There are some who present a very religious face to the public, preaching ideas of love, but who do not practice them when confronted with experiences or opportunities that may result in personal inconvenience or lifestyle discomfort.  Unconditional love cannot continue being flowery words spoken or written, but must become an attained state of consciousness.

“Because Love/oneness is the only reality, all false concepts about love must be allowed to fade away and be replaced by a deeper realization of what love really is.  The third dimensional belief system has created and promoted hundreds of concepts of love, the grandest of them being romantic love.

“Romantic love is based in the belief that everyone is half of a couple.  This concept would be true if humans were simply physical, but they are not and never have been.  Although appearing to be just physical, the reality is that everyone is a whole and complete expression of Divine consciousness having the experience of being in physical form.

“Many, even the very evolved are reluctant to move past their favorite three dimensional concepts of love but as long as an individual continues to seek wholeness, happiness, and fulfillment from another, they remain just that– half of a couple.”

“Let go of concepts proclaiming that things need, should, or must be a certain way in order to be correct.  Most of the world’s ‘shoulds and shouldn’ts’ have been carried in collective consciousness from earlier times when they may have actually made sense for personal safety.  Others are nothing more than rules and regulations given by third dimensional thinkers, governments, and religious leaders often to promote their own agendas.

“You are ready to come out from under the bondage of three dimensional thinking because you have evolved beyond the need for someone to tell you what is right and what is wrong–you already know what is right and wrong.

“Allow yourselves to be who and what you are.  If family or friends think you have become a ‘weirdo’, simply laugh, bless them, and move on.  Does God need outer validation?  Where could it come from since IT is all there is?  …

“For some it takes a great deal of courage to live truth when it begins to unfold from within.  A person may be afraid to speak of these things to those of his old mindset be they family, friends, or church elders.  Living truth is not for the faint hearted especially in the beginning, but continuing to align with some organization or individual out of fear of criticism serves only to keep the person in energy he has outgrown and where he will continue to create experiences reflective of that energy.

“The choice is yours, dear ones.  Do you choose to be what you already are or do you wish to continue with the illusion of being a poor human constantly suffering third dimensional problems and continually seeking a savior, human or Divine, to save you?.

“Stop waiting for someone or something to change the world for you.  Only the awakened consciousness of the collective can and is shifting the three dimensional world out of illusion.

“Allow the real YOU to create your experiences.  You are your own Light should you choose to accept this fact.

“You are Divine Consciousness in expression.  Claim it.”

Or Dan Scranton’s Channeling for 14 January…

https://danielscranton.com/defeating-others-is-not-a-part-of-the-shift-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

“We are more than satisfied with the progress of humanity, and furthermore, we are certain that your progress will continue to impress us.  Now, we know that it is easy to find the faults with where you are as a collective and to focus on them because they are right there in your face, very loud and somewhat destructive.

“So your approach now to helping humanity as the lightworkers you are has to be aimed at changing the way you perceive those noisy, low frequency aspects of the human collective.  We invite you to see that humanity is getting all of this out of its system in preparation for the shift in consciousness.  There are very old disputes that you have on planet Earth, and they actually extend back even further than when human life on Earth began.

“You are there settling very old scores, and you have needed to try the old way of going about it for quite some time.  Again, you need to realize what works by first realizing what does not work.  Seeking to defeat the so-called enemy, no matter how bad they appear to be, will never work for humanity, and there’s a reason for that.  The reason is that you are there to bring together all aspects of you so that you can become your higher selves.

“You cannot bring together all of the parts if any of the parts are eliminated or destroyed.  Again, we invite you to see the attempts to destroy one group of humans by another as the last gasp, the last ditch effort for certain aspects of humanity to cling to the third dimensional ways.

“If you are receiving this transmission, you are not among those who wish to do this.  And so again, we urge you all to be the peace, and the sanity, be the calm at the center of the storm.  And in so doing, you will integrate yourselves, your human collective, and this beautiful galaxy of ours.”

Paranoid Thoughts?

June 5, 2018

We’re approaching 9 June’s Station of Nessus (3am PDT).  As most of you know, a planet’s Energy is Strongest at, and leading up to, its Station, and Nessus is about Healing Abuse and Privilege.  It’s in Pisces, which is all about Finishing Business and Letting Go of Excess Baggage, especially Heavy Emotions, so we can begin the next leg of our next Journey with a Light load.

Of course the quickest way to Heal anything is to Embrace it with Unconditional Love and Empathy, and to do that, we sometimes have to Re-Experience it in some form.  So all manner of Guilt, Veiled (or otherwise) Fear or Terror, and other Ugliness may arise between now and 9 June, including otherwise-unexplained unpleasant Experiences with other people that are Unconsciously Standing In as bit players in our Karmic Dramas.

Yes, they could be Reincarnations of our former Perps, but why not give them the Benefit of the Doubt and let them be Innocent, as in their Present Incarnation they’re likely to be.  After all, they could as likely be Reincarnations of former Victims or your own Abuse and Privilege, just with the roles switched for variety.

It’s important to be Aware that this is happening, so we can Respond positively.  It’s very easy to attribute such Flushbacks to the Present Moment, even though our daily Dramas are probably dime-novel Re-Enactments of our Karmic Traumas and all of Their previous attempts at Re-Enacting themselves, some of which could have Been or Felt very Real.

Remember that Consciousness pervades Everything, including our Karmic Traumas, and if we’re still in Separation (which to some extent we All are if we’re still Incarnate), then these Traumas are virtually “Entities” with a Life of Their own.  Until we Merge with Them, which can Be and Feel quite Horrible while we’re Transitioning into Their Experience. 

And once we’re Inside of Their Experience, we may need some or all of our Enlightened Consciousness (we All have at least some) to be Unconditionally Loving with Them.  Considering how many Lifetimes we’ve probably Lived (likely approaching Infinity), we have Seen It All Before, so it’s more about Being Loving and Gentle with all the Ickiness, once we get past being Horrified.  Maybe we should practice with Slugs.

When we mis-identify Karmic Flushbacks as Present Moment events, we’re very likely to make Decisions or Oaths like “I’ll never do that again” or “I’ll never talk to them again,” or far worse.  Decisions like this rapidly become Unconscious Limitations, and inhibit our Liberation.

We’ll draw up the chart soon, but suffice it to say for now that Orcus, the planet of Oath-Making and Oath-Breaking, Opposes the Stationary Nessus, forming the base of a T-Square to asteroid Moira.  Moira is about Fate.  Fate is what happens to us when we’re Unconscious; Choice is what we Choose to exercise when we’re Conscious.  So we’re Taking Our Power and Breaking an Ancient Contract with our Fate, potentially the one that equates Life with Suffering.

We tend to think of such Contracts as “Facts of Life,” but in fact they’re just Political Choices we made so long ago that we’ve forgotten that it was our Choice.  While the Resistance may be substantial, and the Implications may be complex, we can actually Choose Whatever We Want.  And if we Consider it carefully and boldly, we can actually also Choose trivial Resistance and simple Implications.  That’s on of the reasons why we recommend adding “Lovingly and Gently” to our PIAVAs.

There is also a T-Square to asteroids Nemesis and Lachesis in the Nessus-Station chart.  Nemesis is about Ego Death, while Lachesis is about Choosing to Shift a Karmic or Fated Timeline before it would Shift on its own.  So what we’re really doing here, should we Choose to Accept it, is Shifting our Approach to Ego Death, toward Love and Excitement rather than Fear and Resistance. The base of this second T-Square is the Nodal Axis, with Mars (Anger or Action) on the South Node (Held Emotions) and Aletheia (Truth) on the North Node (Mission in the Lifetime).

Here’s Daniel Scranton’s Channeling for today…

http://danielscranton.com/join-team-ascension-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

We are taking nothing for granted when it comes to our participation in the shift in consciousness.  There are so many beings in this universe who are working to ensure that the shift not only occurs, but that it occurs in the way that serves the most.  We invite any and all of you who want to be a part of this conscious creation to move beyond waiting for something to happen.

“We invite you to join us in ushering in the shift and bringing about an expanded consciousness throughout the entire universe.  You don’t have to wait for any major event to occur in order to participate.

“This is a shift in consciousness, which means nothing in the physical realm is going to be responsible for making it happen.  It is the true nature of consciousness to expand and evolve, and therefore, as you make it your mission not to do something in the physical realm, but instead consciously evolve, you are joining the team.  You have opportunities every single day. They come to you in the choices that you are being given.

“And you can help yourselves and help the entire universe at the same time by making the choice that is more inclusive than exclusive.  You can help by processing your emotions.  You can help by making eye contact with someone else and helping that person understand that he or she matters.  You can be kind instead of being right.  You can forgive.  You can send transmissions of love and compassion.  You can speak your truth, be true to yourself, and love yourself no matter what you have done, or said, or thought.

“As you make a commitment now to joining the team that spans the entire galaxy and all dimensions, you are helping to usher in the best possible shift that we can all experience.  We are inviting you to join us, and we know many of you already have, but as you make the declaration, you are automatically accepted onto our little team.

Healing Abuse Full Moon

March 30, 2018

The Paradox Yin Gate Full Moon will impact us strongly from a few days before 31 March (4:30 am PST), to several weeks thereafter.  It’s at 11 Degrees of Libra.  A Yin Gate (three Oppositions one Sign apart; the Power arises from the four Quincunxes formed by the ends of the Oppositions) Configuration symbolizes a Mystery School to Teach us how to Accept Paradox…

“The current composition of the Earth’s space comes into being through a very limited cooperation between the rational mind on one side and the consciousness of nature, including its life forces, on the other.  It is a result of a millennia-long process during which the [European-dominated] collective human mind has selected only those elements of the multidimensional reality that can be addressed through rational thought and causal logic.  We [in Cultures of European origin] currently perceive and live in space as a rationally structured extract of reality, not reality itself.” –Mark0 Pogačnik, Sacred Geography, p.13.

Communication (Mercury) Conjoins Essence (the Sun), indicating Insight, while asteroids Trust (Eurydike) and Endings (Atropos) are Merged with (Conjoin) the Goddess (Moon), signifying that we’re in the process of Letting Go of Barriers to Trust.  The Full Moon itself is one diagonal axis of the Yin Gate, while the Nodal Axis is the other – meaning that the Paradoxes that we’re Learning to Accept As They Are (rather than trying to squeeze them into Duality) here are Fundamental to Life.

Action (Mars), Focus (Saturn), and Letting Go of Obstacles to Self-Sovereignty (Hylonome) Challenge (T-Square) the Full Moon.  Bottom Line, this Full Moon (apart from the Paradoxes) is about Trusting that if we take the Risk to Express our True Self, the Universe will make a Safe Space for us.

We can Expect major Epiphanies around Fear, Truth, and Self-Abandonment (Mjōlnirs to Sedna from the Moon-Hylonome Square, to Veritas from the Sun-Hylonome Square, and to Hynonome-Saturn-Mars from the Veritas-Sedna Square; a Mjōlnir is formed when a third planet sits at the Far Midpoint between the two ends of a Square, Trioctile to each).  When Fear arises, and when you don’t feel Grounded, remember your Tapping, Breathing, and Kegels.

The crux (central axis) of the Paradox Lesson is the Opposition between Abuse and Privilege (Nessus) and Breaking Oaths (Orcus)Under the Duress of Abuse, we made Pledges to ourself such as “I can Never talk about this or they’ll Kill Mom,” and “This is too Painful or Weird, I have to Numb myself to it in order to Survive,” and “I don’t know how or when, but someday I’ll get even for this,” and the like. 

The Pledges may have been Conscious, Semi-Conscious, or fully Unconscious (made without our Conscious Awareness).  Abuse can take many forms – sexual, physical, mental, emotional, neglect or Abandonment, overfocus or Suffocation, Shaming, and many other processes, including Adults Expecting to be Parented by their Children.

These Oaths present major Lose-Lose Dilemmas.  By definition we were on the Losing end of Privilege, which means we lacked a context and language to put the Abuse into any sort of Framework or Context.  No matter how Obsessively we tried, we were never able to figure out “What did I do to Deserve this?” 

So we never had a way to Explain it to ourself, let alone talk about it, even if we could do so without disastrous consequences.  That’s still True today.  You can Justify neither your Victim nor your Outrage, and those two Mysterious and Powerful parts of yourself are still Arguing vehemently with one another inside yourself.

The Paradox is that It-Was-What-It-Was and there’s nothing we can do to Change it other than (starting by) Accepting our Confusion for the True Emotion that Confusion is, without trying to make Sense of it. 

It might help us get grounded if we open a journal and write out both sides of the Argument, one of the left-hand page and the other on the right-hand page.  The “Reasons” for the Abuse we received were not from the Current Lifetime, which Limits our ability to Grok What Happened and Why.  Give the Effort to Understand over to the Goddess, every time you’re Tempted to Indulge it.

Poor-Sweetheart your Abused Self, your Confused Self, your Angry Self, and any other Folk who show up.  Then Listen to see if they have anything to say to you.  Healing won’t occur till you Learn to Embrace every one of your Inner Denizens with Unconditional Self-Love.  Consistently and Permanently.  See if you can move in this direction while using as few words as possible.

Endings II

February 11, 2018

Another place where we get very Confused about Boundaries, is the Edge between Ego and Soul.  Most people I meet have a very hard time imagining anything except a solid, opaque wall between themselves and their Soul, and they don’t even expect Mexico to pay for it.  Daniel Scranton Channels some Pleiadian Wisdom about this…

http://danielscranton.com/mission-earth-%e2%88%9ethe-pleiadian-high-council-of-seven-3/

“Before you ever set foot on planet Earth for the very first time, you understood that this was a mission.  You understood that Earth had a very special place in the galaxy and that you were embarking upon a very specific mission for all of consciousness.

“You all saw this experience as the greatest possible challenge that you could embark upon.  And while you knew that there would be some very dark times, quite a bit of pain, and a little too much suffering, you stepped right up to it and decided that this was the only place for you to be.

“Now as you began your cycle of lifetimes on planet Earth, you also understood how far you would be able to expand.  You understood that the reward for being on planet Earth was like none other in the galaxy.  And so you feel that the pain and suffering was worth it.  You may not feel it now, from where you stand, but we guarantee you that you feel it on the level of your higher self and your oversoul.

“Your next mission on this journey will be to create a brand new Earthly experience for yourselves and for all future generations, and those experiences will not be about challenges.  The next mission is about experiencing joy and unbridled, unconditional love.  You have come this far in order to feel what it is like to move from the depths of darkness to the heights of ecstasy.

“Now when you decide to embark upon the new mission is up to you.  It is up to you how much longer you play with the third-dimensional rules and when you fully embrace the fifth-dimensional perspective, the fifth-dimensional frequency, the fifth-dimensional experience of reality.  We know that many of you feel ready, and we say to you that you are.  It is all just a matter of opening your heart, letting that be your guide, and forgetting everything that you think you have learned up until this point.”

The chart of the Atropos Station is relatively simple.  Atropos Conjoins – meaning that it’s Merged With (speaking of Boundaries) Eurydike, or Trust – still barely moving after it’s 4 February Station, and precisely Conjunct Atropos when the latter Stands Still.  Are we Scared to Let Go of What We Know So Well, this Karma, and Accept what lies beyond Endings, the Unknown?  That would be natural.  If you considered it carefully, you might well find you’d much rather Step Out of your Karmic Self-Sabotage Patterns than Stay In them.  But considering it carefully would mean you’d have to recognize that your Karma is your own Creation.  Most of the time most of us just Feel Victimized by our Archetypes, as if they were woven by Someone Else.

The ignorati refer to this as “New Age Guilt,” the idea that somehow I Chose to Manifest the Reality I Live in.  Why would I Choose Suffering?  They see it that way simply because they are unable to refer to their Soul as “I” – they see their Soul as Someone Else.  So this Adventure is about Trusting that we can End Habits that no longer serve us, and still Live Well afterwards.  If it was Someone Else who installed those Habits, do we Fear that they will Punish us if we End them?  If we still Live our Life as a Child subject to our Programmers’ rules, of course we do.  But we as a Soul Chose those Programmers, to set up situations that Mirror our Karma, so we can Recognize it and End it.  Part of our Mission.

Eurydike-Atropos Station in fact makes a Trine Bridge, defining the Easy Path, across the Nodal Axis.  The Nodal Axis is nothing if it’s not our map for getting from our Karma to our Mission.  Asteroid Sappho – Self-Love – sits on our South Node, which symbolizes the Karma that we’ve sown, the Patterns and Archetypes we took this Lifetime to Let Go of.  Do we Love Ourself in spite of our Karma?

Our Mission is not Letting Go of our Karma.  It’s just that the Hidden Skills which we need in order to Achieve our Mission, are hidden beneath our Held Emotions.  Held Emotions are the Emotions we cannot face because it would be too Scary, our cosmic PTSD.  Letting Go of our Karma, Letting Go of those Archetypes, those seemingly unshakeable Habits that Sabotage us over and over again, requires that we Feel those Forbidden Emotions, requires an Ego Death.  Yet the Ego’s job is to keep us Alive.  Which is the same error we all make – the Ego is supposed to keep us Alive, not to keep itself Alive.  How can it keep us Alive though, if it Dies?  Another Paradox.

Our Karmic Archetypes are Compulsive, or we’d be able to Let them Go easily.  In the map of the Station, Pluto, symbolizing Compulsion, makes a Quincunx Bridge to the Nodal Axis.  A Quincunx Bridge is like meeting Gollum.  But rather than Solve the constant stream of Riddles, we need to Zen them – leave them as Riddles, unanswered.  Anything that the Dualistic mind can conjure to Respond to them, will be a knife in the Heart of Mystery. 

That Fearless Child, in Awe at the marvelous things around Her, completely unprepared to try to make Sense of them, and, apart from trying to Understand the Abuse she so unfairly Received, having no need to make Sense of them.  That Child, pre-Abuse, is the one we need to Recover.  She holds the Ring.  The Abuse is the re-enactment of our Karma.  Who were we before we stumbled into these Patterns of Sabotage?  We’d need to go back to Lilith, to our Self-Sovereignty.  It’s a Mystery, but if you let “I” be your Soul for a few moments, you’ll Know Exactly what it is and Who You Are.

In the Station chart, Pluto is Conjoined by Chariklo, representing our Self-Confidence.  The two of them Square Atropos-Eurydike, symbolizing Mastery through Challenge.  Mastering the subtle Art of having Confidence that our Compulsions will lead us back to Awe, the subtle Art of Trusting that Ending our 3D Timeline will Liberate us to a Greater Mastery.  It’s the same as Sappho-South Node; Loving Ourself as our Karma.  Can you let “I” be your Karma for a few moments? 

When we drop all Self-Judgment then it doesn’t matter Who We Are, does it.  We are simply Unconditional Love, Personified.  If we are “just” Love, then what do Patterns and Habits and Archetypes matter?  They don’t even exist.  We can’t be “just” Love without being in the Present Moment, and in the Present Moment our Karma is undefined.  Habits by definition Remove us from the Present Moment.