Archive for the ‘Abuse’ Category

Karma Repair 5

May 21, 2019

A friend of mine recently intended to say “I’m Hungry” and it came out as “I’m Angry” – that’s how Subtle these Energies are.  They’re Opportunities; often our Karma is a lot more In-Our-Face, and it will be again if we continue to pass on the Subtle Opportunities.

Here’s the chart for the 23 May (5pm PDT) Station of Orcus in 10 Virgo, drawn in the lighter lines.  The heavier lines show the closely related 19 May Merger of Saturn with the Mean South Node in 21 Capricorn (see the previous Karma Repair posts)…

You can see that the T-Square (red triangle) containing Orcus is focused on asteroid Ceres (which would be called “Cup-Hook” if we named planets after their glyphs).  In other words, the main issue here is Sustainability.  Not just Can We Let Go of Our Karma, but also Can We Continue to Choose Otherwise?

The third corner of this T-Square triangle is dwarf planet Nessus – Abuse and Privilege.  So it’s not just Letting Go of Our Karma, it’s Permanently Letting Go of Abuse, which means Naming it what it is, and Setting Firm Boundaries around it.  And yes, asteroid Pallas (Boundaries – the diamond on a cross) is involved, in a very positive way (a Quincunx Bridge – green lines – across the Orcus-Nessus Opposition; a Quincunx Bridge means it’s Grace unless we try to Anal-yze it).

But who is this Orcus fellow?  He was a pre-Roman Etruscan God-figure whose job was to Punish Oath-Breakers.  Strikes Terror, eh?  How many times have we been threatened with Dire Consequences if we Break an Oath?  The Yangtegrity Patriarchy made a big deal of Oaths, but hereabouts we lean more toward Yintegrity, as does our 5D future.  Oaths are spawn of Duality, and we prefer to Relate to the Universe as Unitary and Multifarious.  It’s the Limited mind that has great difficulty getting past Either/Or Duality.  When we aren’t In the Flow and Living Intuitively, then Yangtegrity is useful.  But it keeps us in 3D; Either/Or is Political, Both/And is Spiritual.

It turns out that our Unconscious Limiting Beliefs have their roots in forgotten Oaths that we made a long time ago, often in other Lifetimes.  The All-or-Nothing, Unconditional nature of Oaths is a side-effect of Duality.  The rest of Life is Situational.  We don’t Vow never to cross the street, we Vow to look both ways and cross only when it’s Safe – we use the “rule” if it fits the Situation; if it doesn’t fit, we look for Alternatives.  One way to interpret the impact of Ceres in this T-Square, is that it Invites us to Let Go of our Unconditional Oaths – the last thing we want to do is Sustain our Self-Sabotage!

With Nessus involved, we have to consider examples involving Abuse.  When Uncle Andy violated us and warned that they’d kill Mom if we told anyone, of course we Vowed never to tell.  And of course we Forgot it, because we worked our butt off to Forget the whole Trauma.  So how does that Vow impact our Lives now?  What if we PIAVAed to Open up that Wound so we could Let it Go?  Would this Vow prevent that Opening from happening?  It would probably do its best to try.  Meanwhile, what Experiences does the Vow prevent us from Indulging?

Unfortunately, the Unconscious often agitates for its own Clearing.  So we may be attracted to Abusers, or to the Abused, and we may have difficulty Breaking this “Habit” until we Clear the origin.  We may not Trust other people, or we may need to keep them at a Distance.  We may have to deal with Suffocation issues that aren’t really “ours.”  These Limits may interfere with What We Really Want out of Life – our Souls are more than clever enough to set up Life circumstances where the only way we can get what we Want most is to Confront our Limits.  That’s the nature of the Nodal Axis.

But, the Orcus-Nessus Opposition (Reverting Oaths involving Abuse or Privilege) is also Bridged by blue lines, or Grace (the Trine Bridge to asteroid Nemesis, which symbolizes Ego Death). Ego Death doesn’t need to be Traumatic, though it depends on our Beliefs about how much of our Life is critically Dependent on that particular Ego.  But Trust me, there are a thousand other potential Egos waiting in the wings to take over, and most of them will do a fine job.

The Egos that won’t do a fine job, will connect you to ancillary issues that you also need to Clear in order to Liberate yourself.  You can even Modulate the pace of your Ego-Clearing – all you need to do is Ask.  “God/Goddess, please lead me Lovingly, Gently, Rapidly, and Completely through the process of Liberating myself from Abuse Memories and any resulting Oaths I (or a former Incarnation) may have made as a result,” for instance.  This is a Trine Bridge, it’s the Easy Path around the difficulty.  Asking for What You Want is a fabulous way to Accept Grace.

Gifts 1a

February 20, 2019

A reader writes…

“The last paragraph [of the Gifts 1 post] points to what I see as an impossible question: how can I have permission to be who I really am?  Certainly I cannot change all of society, that is ridiculous.  Yet, I do see myself as a victim of this scenario.  While interacting with others, I find that if I am to be fully honest, I pour out all of my pain and victimhood in an elaborate and epic story, which then only inevitably leads to more suffering.

“So my only choices are Be an Imposter, or Share my Truth that I am Experiencing as Pain.

“I try to ‘switch the channel’ but I have so much trouble keeping it there.  It makes my mood swings so bad sometimes that I exhaust myself and end up feeling quite hopeless.

“I would like to know how we can remedy this and receive Permission to Be Who we Really Are.  I am PIAVAing the question, and trying not to think about the answer while keeping myself distracted, which has been leading to the Impostor thing.

“At least I know that I am not alone in this and that there are others who are working on these same issues.”

You can say that again (that you aren’t alone in this)!

If there’s a Re-evaluation Counseling (“RC,” often called Co-Counseling) group in your area (https://www.rc.org/), that might be a good place to start; it’s a peer-counseling program that not only tries to give its peers the Opportunity to Practice being Themselves, but also aims to change “all of society.”

The Permission of course comes from yourself, not from outside, but it sounds like you’ve already given yourself this Permission, but you just haven’t found it satisfying, if I’m hearing you okay.  Those of us who never Received that Permission from outside when we were kids, are in the position where part or parts of our Personality are Frozen at the age when our Repression began or peaked.

At their age, there’s no Question that they were Victims, and giving our Inner Little One Permission to Indulge their Victimhood all day long is an important step.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you were seriously Victimized, weren’t you.  Do you want to talk about it?”  You may or may not be able to open a Dialog with your Inner Little One, but Letting them know that you’re Available and Willing to Listen to them is a big step.  This also establishes the Habit of Recognizing that your Little One and your Present Moment Self are not the same, and that’s a very important step.

When we crack open the door to the closet where that Little One still hides, we have to deal with a Personality of that age, which is usually difficult.  You can Practice talking about “Her” or “His” Feelings as distinct from Your Present-Moment Self’s Feelings.  A common syndrome that arises from Child Abuse is that the resulting Adult often Channels the Abused Little One without the Adult Recognizing that they’re Regressed.  If that Energy gets directed at someone who’s not actually Abusing the Adult in the Present Moment, it raises havoc with the Present-Moment Relationship.

I’m not a professional at this practice, but I have some Experience.  The World is a big place, and somewhere, quite possibly somewhere nearby, there are people, maybe more than one, who would Give you Permission to be your True Self, often with the Condition that you Reciprocate.  Hence, RC, as an example.  You could PIAVA to encounter one or more of them.  Non-Violent Communication (“NVC”) is also a possibility (https://www.cnvc.org/), but its program is more formulaic (though no less valuable) and hence harder to get fluent with.

One of the things that NVC (and Eugene Gendlin, as in Focusing) teaches is that Abuse emphasizes Duality, and we come out of it seeing the World as “black and white.”  So when given the Opportunity to Express our True Self, we hand the mic to our Abused Little One and Let it Go without Abandon.  We don’t see any Alternatives to Complete Repression and Complete Expression.  But there are a thousand stages in between, and we can Practice them.  Carefully distinguishing between the Present Moment and our Little One’s Experience, will Reveal many of them.

The point is, like anyone and especially any Little One, you need Practice.  For the first while you’ll see yourself (as others may or may not) as a babysitter’s Nightmare.  So you need a Safe Place to Let that happen.  Once you do you’ll be Surprised at how fast your Little One matures.  But, you’ll have a huge backlog of Self-Judgment, because that’s probably the only way you could keep your Little One Safe when She or He really was Little.

So you need to PIAVA, and thoroughly Train yourself, to Notice Self-Judgment as soon as possible when it arises – if it ever naps.  Part of Being and Expressing your True Self is Noticing and Expressing your Self-Doubt.  The faster you can Express that, even if just to yourself, the less you’ll Reinforce the Negative Patterns.  The process is about Noticing and Changing Self-Judging Habits, and replacing then with Self-Appreciating Habits.  And simply Noticing (and of course Reverting) a Self-Judgment is a Powerfully Self-Appreciating Habit!

Eventually you’ll stop beating yourself up for repeating a Negative Pattern, and start Congratulating yourself for Noticing that you’re repeating a Negative Habit.  This is a Virtuous Spiral, because each time you Notice, you’re likely to Notice Sooner next time, and the Sooner you Notice, the Easier it becomes.  We can climb out of a Karmic dungeon surprisingly quickly using this strategy.

And of course there’s again Poor Sweetheart.  “You Poor Sweetheart, you’re Judging Yourself, aren’t you.”  Even if you Poor-Sweetheart yourself every three minutes all day long, I don’t think you’ll Regret it.

The best book I’ve ever encountered about Recovery from Abuse is Ellen Bass and Laura Davis’s The Courage to Heal.  It’s old (though since revised), but it arises from the Pluto-in-Scorpio 1980s when The Way Out Was Through and Recovery was at the tip of everyone’s minds.  Everybody who was Anybody anyway.

Ultimately we’re looking at Identity.  Who Am I Right Now? is always a good Question to Ask ourself, and the corollary “How Old Am I?” is even better.  If the Answer you get isn’t your actual current age, then you’ve stumbled into a Goldmine of Information about your Karma and Habits.  Switch your Identity to the Present Moment (for example, grasp any Physical Object) and sit down for a good long Interview with the person who Answered your Question.

As I’ve often suggested, the best book in the World about Identity – and about Ego Death, which is now so, and so Appropriately, Popular – is Steven Levine’s Who Dies? That book should be required reading for Everyone.  Steven’s other books also Explore Identity incisively, but Who Dies? is in a class of its own.  I bawled my eyes out all the way through it.

Plus, with the Ancestors now slithering out of their Dens and roaming the Planet, our Self-Judgments and particularly our Lethal Self-Judgments, are going to be on the tip of their tongues, and if we’re not Skilled on the Boundary issues that are so Lit Up recently, and don’t notice that it’s not our own Inner Tongue speaking, then we’re going to be dumped directly into Ego Death, aka Shame, aka Worthlessness, aka Hopelessness, aka Despair.

The Ancestors could even include the Souls of your historical Abusers, and just because they’re Dead (if they are) doesn’t mean that they’re any more Advanced than when they were Alive.  You could be Hearing their hissed “If you tell anyone I’ll kill your Mother” threats without Realizing that this is what’s Triggering the Present-Moment Feelings that aren’t really your Adult’s, but belong to a full-fledged Regression.  And which never really were your own to begin with.

It occurred to me recently that Shame and Pride would be good synonyms for Abuse and Privilege when Nessus is Lit Up – as it is in next week’s chart that we began discussed in Gifts 1.  But “A whole new (Klotho) and very Deep (Sun) Belief System (Vesta) about Abuse (Nessus)” is an incredible Opportunity.  Have I Inspired any of that here?

I’ll be otherwise engaged for the next few days.  Hang in there!

Self-Judgment and Self-Love II

January 15, 2019

Of course the “good news” of a Nemesis Station Square Nessus-OR10 (Ego Death from Embracing or Poor-Sweethearting our Intrusive Abuse Memories), is that it’s an Opportunity to Clear the very Held Emotions that constitute our Unconscious Resistance to migrating into 5D, aka What We Want.  It’s not as complicated as it sounds.  Originally, we set Boundaries against Memories that would Trigger Emotions that would Overwhelm us.

As we got good at this through Repetition, we pushed the Memories and their Emotions out of our Awareness and into Karma.  We made them Unconscious, which means they’re part of Not-Me.  In Real Life we’re Infinite Light Beings Fantasizing a Material Vehicle, and from this Light-Being Perspective nothing is Not-Me.  But when we Identify with our Fantasy Material (/Emotional/Intellectual) Vehicle, then from that Perspective our Not-Me can get Overwhelmingly large, large enough to Take Control of our Vehicle behind its back, without telling us, so to speak – Out of Our Awareness.

This is the Origin of all the Good-Versus-Evil stories you’ve been taught since Birth; “Good” is your Fantasy-Vehicle Identity, and “Bad” is the Not-Me which is the rest of your Light Being, which you don’t recognize as “Me.”  Hence the Classic Warfare Model of HisStory.  His many Stories become Religions or other Group-Thinks like Make-Rome-Great-Again aka Bring-Back-the-Slaves, which the pathologically clever among us exploit for their own Gain.

Moving into Identifying with our Light Body is not a process of Struggle, but a process of Surrender or Allowing or Vulnerability – HerStory.  The Lady Warrior Archetype misses the point, but it’s an intermediate step that might help with our Liberation, if we don’t get Stuck in it.

As we attempt to return our Identity to our Infinite Light Beingness, we find that our Fantasy-Vehicle Identity has to Break Out of a series of Shells, each one Opening us to a “new” (Revealed – Eris) segment of our Not-Me, which Manifests as an Introduction to a Held Emotion (South Node or Karma).  With each Broken Shell our Me Grows toward our 5D Light Being, and our Me Grows in Power – in the sense that we now have greater Healthy Control over our Life Circumstances.

Not the Power-Over which dominates HisStory, but the Power-With that works through Collaboration with the Unseen.  The more we can Delegate Power to the Unseen Energies that actually Carry it, the Easier our Life becomes.  Except of course for the potentially unpleasant “Ego Deaths,” or Molts, or Rebirths, or Embracing/Poor-Sweethearting of our Held Emotions, that occur when one of those Shells Break, because we Experienced those Shells as Security to our Fantasy Vehicle.  Like when Nemesis Acts Out, such as Now through 17 January.

Not to Lament, as Sappho (Self-Love) is also Stationary here, through 20 January.  Unconditional Self-Love is so Central to our Light-Being Self that we’re hardly Aware of it.  While Nemesis can suck out the Air that our Fantasy Vehicle likes to Breathe, nothing can suck out the Light that our Light-Being Self Breathes, though the Illusions of our Fantasy Vehicle like to blind us to that in its misguided attempts to Protect the next Shell.

When we can Experience the Breaking of a Shell as Liberation of a more Power-With-ful Me instead of the demise of a more Limited Power-Over-ful Me, our Growth into Full Collaboration with the Universe has Arrived.  Contrary to the usual Metaphor, there are no Destinations here; there are only More Shells to Break.  5D is not an event, it’s a process, and it’s the process of Enjoying Ego Death.

So let’s have a look at this Opportunity to Experience some serious Ego Deaths in the context of serious Self-Love…

For instance, there’s Marilyn Raffaele’s Channeling for 13 January…

http://www.onenessofall.com/newest.html

(If you don’t find the 13 January 2019 message there, check http://www.onenessofall.com/archives.html.)

“We are the Arcturian Group, a collective of ascended Arcturian beings from the eighth dimension here to assist Gaia and her people during these times of ascending consciousness.

“Know that these messages as well as others that may resonate with you are in reality your own state of consciousness manifesting as the particular message.  If this were not true, you would not be drawn to or be able to understand them.

“You, who are spiritually prepared to expand beyond the illusion and integrate truth are the forefront of the ascension process.  You chose to be on earth during these times of intense energetic chaos and change in order to complete your own third dimensional spiritual journey and become the first wave of ascension and example for those following.

“You are preparing the way for those of the second wave–individuals spiritually ready to awaken but who until now have resisted doing so.  Know that the Light of so many now awakening out of three dimensional sleep state, is shifting and dissolving the old paradigm, even when things appear to be getting worse.  Try not to give up hope but rather stand back as an observer for you are soon going to see much that will restore the hope you may have lost.

“You serve as living breathing examples of unconditional love for those around you when you realize and begin to live out from a consciousness that knows unconditional love is the only reality and that anything else simply represents conditioned beliefs about love.”

“Unconditional love can only ever be all there is because there is only ONE–one substance, one life, one reality, one law.  Love is the energetic glue connecting everything within this Infinite ONE and those who [naively] continue to believe in and live out from a consciousness of separation and duality create for themselves the illusory forms of these beliefs.

“You can ignore, but never change the reality of Oneness by judging from outer appearances as proof of its nonexistence.  Continuing to hold to the third dimensional belief system after outgrowing it only delays a person’s spiritual evolution because Oneness is the foundation of all reality and must be acknowledged at some point.  For some it may be in a future life, for you it is now.

“There are some who present a very religious face to the public, preaching ideas of love, but who do not practice them when confronted with experiences or opportunities that may result in personal inconvenience or lifestyle discomfort.  Unconditional love cannot continue being flowery words spoken or written, but must become an attained state of consciousness.

“Because Love/oneness is the only reality, all false concepts about love must be allowed to fade away and be replaced by a deeper realization of what love really is.  The third dimensional belief system has created and promoted hundreds of concepts of love, the grandest of them being romantic love.

“Romantic love is based in the belief that everyone is half of a couple.  This concept would be true if humans were simply physical, but they are not and never have been.  Although appearing to be just physical, the reality is that everyone is a whole and complete expression of Divine consciousness having the experience of being in physical form.

“Many, even the very evolved are reluctant to move past their favorite three dimensional concepts of love but as long as an individual continues to seek wholeness, happiness, and fulfillment from another, they remain just that– half of a couple.”

“Let go of concepts proclaiming that things need, should, or must be a certain way in order to be correct.  Most of the world’s ‘shoulds and shouldn’ts’ have been carried in collective consciousness from earlier times when they may have actually made sense for personal safety.  Others are nothing more than rules and regulations given by third dimensional thinkers, governments, and religious leaders often to promote their own agendas.

“You are ready to come out from under the bondage of three dimensional thinking because you have evolved beyond the need for someone to tell you what is right and what is wrong–you already know what is right and wrong.

“Allow yourselves to be who and what you are.  If family or friends think you have become a ‘weirdo’, simply laugh, bless them, and move on.  Does God need outer validation?  Where could it come from since IT is all there is?  …

“For some it takes a great deal of courage to live truth when it begins to unfold from within.  A person may be afraid to speak of these things to those of his old mindset be they family, friends, or church elders.  Living truth is not for the faint hearted especially in the beginning, but continuing to align with some organization or individual out of fear of criticism serves only to keep the person in energy he has outgrown and where he will continue to create experiences reflective of that energy.

“The choice is yours, dear ones.  Do you choose to be what you already are or do you wish to continue with the illusion of being a poor human constantly suffering third dimensional problems and continually seeking a savior, human or Divine, to save you?.

“Stop waiting for someone or something to change the world for you.  Only the awakened consciousness of the collective can and is shifting the three dimensional world out of illusion.

“Allow the real YOU to create your experiences.  You are your own Light should you choose to accept this fact.

“You are Divine Consciousness in expression.  Claim it.”

Or Dan Scranton’s Channeling for 14 January…

https://danielscranton.com/defeating-others-is-not-a-part-of-the-shift-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

“We are more than satisfied with the progress of humanity, and furthermore, we are certain that your progress will continue to impress us.  Now, we know that it is easy to find the faults with where you are as a collective and to focus on them because they are right there in your face, very loud and somewhat destructive.

“So your approach now to helping humanity as the lightworkers you are has to be aimed at changing the way you perceive those noisy, low frequency aspects of the human collective.  We invite you to see that humanity is getting all of this out of its system in preparation for the shift in consciousness.  There are very old disputes that you have on planet Earth, and they actually extend back even further than when human life on Earth began.

“You are there settling very old scores, and you have needed to try the old way of going about it for quite some time.  Again, you need to realize what works by first realizing what does not work.  Seeking to defeat the so-called enemy, no matter how bad they appear to be, will never work for humanity, and there’s a reason for that.  The reason is that you are there to bring together all aspects of you so that you can become your higher selves.

“You cannot bring together all of the parts if any of the parts are eliminated or destroyed.  Again, we invite you to see the attempts to destroy one group of humans by another as the last gasp, the last ditch effort for certain aspects of humanity to cling to the third dimensional ways.

“If you are receiving this transmission, you are not among those who wish to do this.  And so again, we urge you all to be the peace, and the sanity, be the calm at the center of the storm.  And in so doing, you will integrate yourselves, your human collective, and this beautiful galaxy of ours.”

Paranoid Thoughts?

June 5, 2018

We’re approaching 9 June’s Station of Nessus (3am PDT).  As most of you know, a planet’s Energy is Strongest at, and leading up to, its Station, and Nessus is about Healing Abuse and Privilege.  It’s in Pisces, which is all about Finishing Business and Letting Go of Excess Baggage, especially Heavy Emotions, so we can begin the next leg of our next Journey with a Light load.

Of course the quickest way to Heal anything is to Embrace it with Unconditional Love and Empathy, and to do that, we sometimes have to Re-Experience it in some form.  So all manner of Guilt, Veiled (or otherwise) Fear or Terror, and other Ugliness may arise between now and 9 June, including otherwise-unexplained unpleasant Experiences with other people that are Unconsciously Standing In as bit players in our Karmic Dramas.

Yes, they could be Reincarnations of our former Perps, but why not give them the Benefit of the Doubt and let them be Innocent, as in their Present Incarnation they’re likely to be.  After all, they could as likely be Reincarnations of former Victims or your own Abuse and Privilege, just with the roles switched for variety.

It’s important to be Aware that this is happening, so we can Respond positively.  It’s very easy to attribute such Flushbacks to the Present Moment, even though our daily Dramas are probably dime-novel Re-Enactments of our Karmic Traumas and all of Their previous attempts at Re-Enacting themselves, some of which could have Been or Felt very Real.

Remember that Consciousness pervades Everything, including our Karmic Traumas, and if we’re still in Separation (which to some extent we All are if we’re still Incarnate), then these Traumas are virtually “Entities” with a Life of Their own.  Until we Merge with Them, which can Be and Feel quite Horrible while we’re Transitioning into Their Experience. 

And once we’re Inside of Their Experience, we may need some or all of our Enlightened Consciousness (we All have at least some) to be Unconditionally Loving with Them.  Considering how many Lifetimes we’ve probably Lived (likely approaching Infinity), we have Seen It All Before, so it’s more about Being Loving and Gentle with all the Ickiness, once we get past being Horrified.  Maybe we should practice with Slugs.

When we mis-identify Karmic Flushbacks as Present Moment events, we’re very likely to make Decisions or Oaths like “I’ll never do that again” or “I’ll never talk to them again,” or far worse.  Decisions like this rapidly become Unconscious Limitations, and inhibit our Liberation.

We’ll draw up the chart soon, but suffice it to say for now that Orcus, the planet of Oath-Making and Oath-Breaking, Opposes the Stationary Nessus, forming the base of a T-Square to asteroid Moira.  Moira is about Fate.  Fate is what happens to us when we’re Unconscious; Choice is what we Choose to exercise when we’re Conscious.  So we’re Taking Our Power and Breaking an Ancient Contract with our Fate, potentially the one that equates Life with Suffering.

We tend to think of such Contracts as “Facts of Life,” but in fact they’re just Political Choices we made so long ago that we’ve forgotten that it was our Choice.  While the Resistance may be substantial, and the Implications may be complex, we can actually Choose Whatever We Want.  And if we Consider it carefully and boldly, we can actually also Choose trivial Resistance and simple Implications.  That’s on of the reasons why we recommend adding “Lovingly and Gently” to our PIAVAs.

There is also a T-Square to asteroids Nemesis and Lachesis in the Nessus-Station chart.  Nemesis is about Ego Death, while Lachesis is about Choosing to Shift a Karmic or Fated Timeline before it would Shift on its own.  So what we’re really doing here, should we Choose to Accept it, is Shifting our Approach to Ego Death, toward Love and Excitement rather than Fear and Resistance. The base of this second T-Square is the Nodal Axis, with Mars (Anger or Action) on the South Node (Held Emotions) and Aletheia (Truth) on the North Node (Mission in the Lifetime).

Here’s Daniel Scranton’s Channeling for today…

http://danielscranton.com/join-team-ascension-%e2%88%9ethe-9th-dimensional-arcturian-council/

We are taking nothing for granted when it comes to our participation in the shift in consciousness.  There are so many beings in this universe who are working to ensure that the shift not only occurs, but that it occurs in the way that serves the most.  We invite any and all of you who want to be a part of this conscious creation to move beyond waiting for something to happen.

“We invite you to join us in ushering in the shift and bringing about an expanded consciousness throughout the entire universe.  You don’t have to wait for any major event to occur in order to participate.

“This is a shift in consciousness, which means nothing in the physical realm is going to be responsible for making it happen.  It is the true nature of consciousness to expand and evolve, and therefore, as you make it your mission not to do something in the physical realm, but instead consciously evolve, you are joining the team.  You have opportunities every single day. They come to you in the choices that you are being given.

“And you can help yourselves and help the entire universe at the same time by making the choice that is more inclusive than exclusive.  You can help by processing your emotions.  You can help by making eye contact with someone else and helping that person understand that he or she matters.  You can be kind instead of being right.  You can forgive.  You can send transmissions of love and compassion.  You can speak your truth, be true to yourself, and love yourself no matter what you have done, or said, or thought.

“As you make a commitment now to joining the team that spans the entire galaxy and all dimensions, you are helping to usher in the best possible shift that we can all experience.  We are inviting you to join us, and we know many of you already have, but as you make the declaration, you are automatically accepted onto our little team.

Healing Abuse Full Moon

March 30, 2018

The Paradox Yin Gate Full Moon will impact us strongly from a few days before 31 March (4:30 am PST), to several weeks thereafter.  It’s at 11 Degrees of Libra.  A Yin Gate (three Oppositions one Sign apart; the Power arises from the four Quincunxes formed by the ends of the Oppositions) Configuration symbolizes a Mystery School to Teach us how to Accept Paradox…

“The current composition of the Earth’s space comes into being through a very limited cooperation between the rational mind on one side and the consciousness of nature, including its life forces, on the other.  It is a result of a millennia-long process during which the [European-dominated] collective human mind has selected only those elements of the multidimensional reality that can be addressed through rational thought and causal logic.  We [in Cultures of European origin] currently perceive and live in space as a rationally structured extract of reality, not reality itself.” –Mark0 Pogačnik, Sacred Geography, p.13.

Communication (Mercury) Conjoins Essence (the Sun), indicating Insight, while asteroids Trust (Eurydike) and Endings (Atropos) are Merged with (Conjoin) the Goddess (Moon), signifying that we’re in the process of Letting Go of Barriers to Trust.  The Full Moon itself is one diagonal axis of the Yin Gate, while the Nodal Axis is the other – meaning that the Paradoxes that we’re Learning to Accept As They Are (rather than trying to squeeze them into Duality) here are Fundamental to Life.

Action (Mars), Focus (Saturn), and Letting Go of Obstacles to Self-Sovereignty (Hylonome) Challenge (T-Square) the Full Moon.  Bottom Line, this Full Moon (apart from the Paradoxes) is about Trusting that if we take the Risk to Express our True Self, the Universe will make a Safe Space for us.

We can Expect major Epiphanies around Fear, Truth, and Self-Abandonment (Mjōlnirs to Sedna from the Moon-Hylonome Square, to Veritas from the Sun-Hylonome Square, and to Hynonome-Saturn-Mars from the Veritas-Sedna Square; a Mjōlnir is formed when a third planet sits at the Far Midpoint between the two ends of a Square, Trioctile to each).  When Fear arises, and when you don’t feel Grounded, remember your Tapping, Breathing, and Kegels.

The crux (central axis) of the Paradox Lesson is the Opposition between Abuse and Privilege (Nessus) and Breaking Oaths (Orcus)Under the Duress of Abuse, we made Pledges to ourself such as “I can Never talk about this or they’ll Kill Mom,” and “This is too Painful or Weird, I have to Numb myself to it in order to Survive,” and “I don’t know how or when, but someday I’ll get even for this,” and the like. 

The Pledges may have been Conscious, Semi-Conscious, or fully Unconscious (made without our Conscious Awareness).  Abuse can take many forms – sexual, physical, mental, emotional, neglect or Abandonment, overfocus or Suffocation, Shaming, and many other processes, including Adults Expecting to be Parented by their Children.

These Oaths present major Lose-Lose Dilemmas.  By definition we were on the Losing end of Privilege, which means we lacked a context and language to put the Abuse into any sort of Framework or Context.  No matter how Obsessively we tried, we were never able to figure out “What did I do to Deserve this?” 

So we never had a way to Explain it to ourself, let alone talk about it, even if we could do so without disastrous consequences.  That’s still True today.  You can Justify neither your Victim nor your Outrage, and those two Mysterious and Powerful parts of yourself are still Arguing vehemently with one another inside yourself.

The Paradox is that It-Was-What-It-Was and there’s nothing we can do to Change it other than (starting by) Accepting our Confusion for the True Emotion that Confusion is, without trying to make Sense of it. 

It might help us get grounded if we open a journal and write out both sides of the Argument, one of the left-hand page and the other on the right-hand page.  The “Reasons” for the Abuse we received were not from the Current Lifetime, which Limits our ability to Grok What Happened and Why.  Give the Effort to Understand over to the Goddess, every time you’re Tempted to Indulge it.

Poor-Sweetheart your Abused Self, your Confused Self, your Angry Self, and any other Folk who show up.  Then Listen to see if they have anything to say to you.  Healing won’t occur till you Learn to Embrace every one of your Inner Denizens with Unconditional Self-Love.  Consistently and Permanently.  See if you can move in this direction while using as few words as possible.

Endings II

February 11, 2018

Another place where we get very Confused about Boundaries, is the Edge between Ego and Soul.  Most people I meet have a very hard time imagining anything except a solid, opaque wall between themselves and their Soul, and they don’t even expect Mexico to pay for it.  Daniel Scranton Channels some Pleiadian Wisdom about this…

http://danielscranton.com/mission-earth-%e2%88%9ethe-pleiadian-high-council-of-seven-3/

“Before you ever set foot on planet Earth for the very first time, you understood that this was a mission.  You understood that Earth had a very special place in the galaxy and that you were embarking upon a very specific mission for all of consciousness.

“You all saw this experience as the greatest possible challenge that you could embark upon.  And while you knew that there would be some very dark times, quite a bit of pain, and a little too much suffering, you stepped right up to it and decided that this was the only place for you to be.

“Now as you began your cycle of lifetimes on planet Earth, you also understood how far you would be able to expand.  You understood that the reward for being on planet Earth was like none other in the galaxy.  And so you feel that the pain and suffering was worth it.  You may not feel it now, from where you stand, but we guarantee you that you feel it on the level of your higher self and your oversoul.

“Your next mission on this journey will be to create a brand new Earthly experience for yourselves and for all future generations, and those experiences will not be about challenges.  The next mission is about experiencing joy and unbridled, unconditional love.  You have come this far in order to feel what it is like to move from the depths of darkness to the heights of ecstasy.

“Now when you decide to embark upon the new mission is up to you.  It is up to you how much longer you play with the third-dimensional rules and when you fully embrace the fifth-dimensional perspective, the fifth-dimensional frequency, the fifth-dimensional experience of reality.  We know that many of you feel ready, and we say to you that you are.  It is all just a matter of opening your heart, letting that be your guide, and forgetting everything that you think you have learned up until this point.”

The chart of the Atropos Station is relatively simple.  Atropos Conjoins – meaning that it’s Merged With (speaking of Boundaries) Eurydike, or Trust – still barely moving after it’s 4 February Station, and precisely Conjunct Atropos when the latter Stands Still.  Are we Scared to Let Go of What We Know So Well, this Karma, and Accept what lies beyond Endings, the Unknown?  That would be natural.  If you considered it carefully, you might well find you’d much rather Step Out of your Karmic Self-Sabotage Patterns than Stay In them.  But considering it carefully would mean you’d have to recognize that your Karma is your own Creation.  Most of the time most of us just Feel Victimized by our Archetypes, as if they were woven by Someone Else.

The ignorati refer to this as “New Age Guilt,” the idea that somehow I Chose to Manifest the Reality I Live in.  Why would I Choose Suffering?  They see it that way simply because they are unable to refer to their Soul as “I” – they see their Soul as Someone Else.  So this Adventure is about Trusting that we can End Habits that no longer serve us, and still Live Well afterwards.  If it was Someone Else who installed those Habits, do we Fear that they will Punish us if we End them?  If we still Live our Life as a Child subject to our Programmers’ rules, of course we do.  But we as a Soul Chose those Programmers, to set up situations that Mirror our Karma, so we can Recognize it and End it.  Part of our Mission.

Eurydike-Atropos Station in fact makes a Trine Bridge, defining the Easy Path, across the Nodal Axis.  The Nodal Axis is nothing if it’s not our map for getting from our Karma to our Mission.  Asteroid Sappho – Self-Love – sits on our South Node, which symbolizes the Karma that we’ve sown, the Patterns and Archetypes we took this Lifetime to Let Go of.  Do we Love Ourself in spite of our Karma?

Our Mission is not Letting Go of our Karma.  It’s just that the Hidden Skills which we need in order to Achieve our Mission, are hidden beneath our Held Emotions.  Held Emotions are the Emotions we cannot face because it would be too Scary, our cosmic PTSD.  Letting Go of our Karma, Letting Go of those Archetypes, those seemingly unshakeable Habits that Sabotage us over and over again, requires that we Feel those Forbidden Emotions, requires an Ego Death.  Yet the Ego’s job is to keep us Alive.  Which is the same error we all make – the Ego is supposed to keep us Alive, not to keep itself Alive.  How can it keep us Alive though, if it Dies?  Another Paradox.

Our Karmic Archetypes are Compulsive, or we’d be able to Let them Go easily.  In the map of the Station, Pluto, symbolizing Compulsion, makes a Quincunx Bridge to the Nodal Axis.  A Quincunx Bridge is like meeting Gollum.  But rather than Solve the constant stream of Riddles, we need to Zen them – leave them as Riddles, unanswered.  Anything that the Dualistic mind can conjure to Respond to them, will be a knife in the Heart of Mystery. 

That Fearless Child, in Awe at the marvelous things around Her, completely unprepared to try to make Sense of them, and, apart from trying to Understand the Abuse she so unfairly Received, having no need to make Sense of them.  That Child, pre-Abuse, is the one we need to Recover.  She holds the Ring.  The Abuse is the re-enactment of our Karma.  Who were we before we stumbled into these Patterns of Sabotage?  We’d need to go back to Lilith, to our Self-Sovereignty.  It’s a Mystery, but if you let “I” be your Soul for a few moments, you’ll Know Exactly what it is and Who You Are.

In the Station chart, Pluto is Conjoined by Chariklo, representing our Self-Confidence.  The two of them Square Atropos-Eurydike, symbolizing Mastery through Challenge.  Mastering the subtle Art of having Confidence that our Compulsions will lead us back to Awe, the subtle Art of Trusting that Ending our 3D Timeline will Liberate us to a Greater Mastery.  It’s the same as Sappho-South Node; Loving Ourself as our Karma.  Can you let “I” be your Karma for a few moments? 

When we drop all Self-Judgment then it doesn’t matter Who We Are, does it.  We are simply Unconditional Love, Personified.  If we are “just” Love, then what do Patterns and Habits and Archetypes matter?  They don’t even exist.  We can’t be “just” Love without being in the Present Moment, and in the Present Moment our Karma is undefined.  Habits by definition Remove us from the Present Moment.

Timelines IIa

January 21, 2018

With much appreciation, a rich trove of excellent Perspectives from Undeniably Sara…

 https://undeniablysara.com/author/undeniablysara/

“Draining boiled pasta water into the sink is a trigger for me – every time.  Chopping onions, doing laundry, mopping the floor, planting a garden and driving – these are just some of the mundane everyday activities that start a movie playing in my head.  I hear every word, see each expression, smell the scents, and experience all the fear as if it were happening again right now.  Even after all these years the memories still give me pause, and I must consciously stop the movie playing and add a narrative that explains these events are in the past.  Remembering past events is not my choice but my reaction to them is, and I choose to see the ridiculousness of the people who hurt me.  It makes them seem small and less threatening which helps me keep moving forward.”

“My upbringing encouraged me to hold in my emotions and deny my secrets.  While this muting was not malicious, it resulted in devastating consequences for my life.  A strong person, I was taught, was one who did not react to emotional situations.  Only strong people restrain themselves and their feelings.  Love was one of the emotions kept under wraps encompassing the physical and verbal expressions.  In the end, hiding the abuse my children and I suffered at the hands of their father/my ex-husband resulted in physical and emotional illness, job loss and financial ruin.  I can’t help but wonder how different things would be if I was encouraged to share my thoughts and feelings.  It is difficult and many times uncomfortable to share my story or ‘sing my song’ but I know the process is healing and I am determined to prevail.”

5febdd90740aeae8a9fc5d828ccfbcad

“I have repeated many things I was too ignorant to repair.  At one point I merely thought I just had bad luck with relationships.  Many times I was told relationship failures were solely my responsibility.  In truth, healthy boundaries were nonexistent in my life, and it took lots of pain and loss for me to see that.  Now I understand that because I did not respect myself, I allowed others to disrespect me.  So, there is some validity to the statement that my failed relationships were my fault.  I failed to repair my broken pieces and that invited manipulative, abusive people into my life.  The process of repairing is well underway but still incomplete making me fear any new relationship.  I am hopeful that someday I will be well enough to have a healthy relationship.  Until then being single and focusing on raising my children is more than enough to fill my days while the repairs continue.”

Healing Flame

From https://alexhousemn.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/letting-your-light-shine-teens-healing-from-abuse/ via Undeniably Sara.

Timelines II

January 20, 2018

Before I go on to the Saturn-Klotho Initiation and the Haumea Station charts, let me annotate the previous post a bit more; I had to hurry it out the door because of engagements otherwise…

As Dan & Friends, and others including us, have frequently pointed out that we Feel our way into New Timelines…

https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/2018/01/17/having-it-all/

https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/2017/10/09/piafa-ii/

https://astrobuss.wordpress.com/2018/01/02/world-peace-timeline-ii/

The Saturn-Klotho 4-Capricorn Initiation (“Capricorn 4 is ‘A group of people prepare a large canoe for a journey by water’ – starting another Timeline, an Emotional one,” 5pm PST 21 January), points us in that direction…

The chart isn’t as messy as it looks.  Put your thumb over OR10-Nessus-Nemesis at the upper right, and what we have left is a Diamond Star Enhanced by a Grand Trine…

That’s a pretty Exalted chart!  It’s all about Boundaries (Pallas).  The would-be Challenge (the T-Square) is about whether your Boundaries Enhance your Life Force or Drain it (Varuna-Aletheia), and whether your Values Serve your Self-Love or Diminish it (Venus-Sappho).  Which are pretty Fundamental, and Serious, Challenges. 

But it’s a Diamond Star – the “Bowl of Grace” under the T-Square includes What We’re Manifesting (Makemake), and Which Among Our Beliefs are Archaic (Vesta-Karma).  These are “free clues” that, if we’re Open to the Information they provide, will Facilitate our Letting Go of Values that Diminish our Self-Love and Boundaries that Drain our Life Force. 

By PIAVAing Clarity about the Disconnect between What We Want and What Actually Is (Makemake), we can see where we need to go next with our Tapping and Poor-Sweethearting.  And by PIAVAing Loving Awareness of our Archetypes, we can see where we need to Learn new Responses to the World (Vesta-Karma).

Then we have that fat Earth Grand Trine (Dumb-Luck Grace) in the center, promising Great Blessings between our Boundaries (Pallas), our Truth (Veritas), and our New Timeline (Saturn-Klotho-Quaoar).

But where are the promised Emotions?  None of these twelve planets are in Water Signs.  They’re under your thumb – OR10-Nessus-Nemesis in Pisces.  OR10 signifies Intrusive Memories, Nessus represents Abuse, Nemesis symbolizes Ego Death, and Pisces is about Finishing Business with Emotional Baggage.  Yes, that’s all very Threatening, but it’s a zit on the side of a well-organized chart full of incredible Grace. 

So yes, by all means Feel and Embrace any Fear that the Threat of Revisiting your PTSD evokes.  That step is critical, as without it you may have to Re-Experience the Trauma rather than Revisit it.  What to do with Fear?  Certainly Tap it Out (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzVd6Ww0as4), Breathe (Fear + Breathing = Excitement), and do your Kegels (which in combination with Fear cause Time to slow down so it’s more manageable). 

You may want to enlist an Ally to help keep part of you in the Present Moment.  We Heal first by first Holding our Traumatic Regression and our Present-Moment Safety in our Awareness at the same time – which is why we’ve been practicing Cognitive Dissonance (Holding Contradictory Beliefs without Competition between them) all these years.  And second, by enlisting our Present-Moment Self to Poor-Sweetheart our Regressed Self as a start toward Loving Her Unconditionally and Lovingly Reparenting Her.  Or Him.

We’re describing this as if it’s an easy mechanical process when in fact it’s an Overwhelmingly Emotional process.  But maybe not as Overwhelming as we Fear.  Karma is Dead.  We know that Karma does not Grasp us, we Grasp our Karma, only because it’s a Habit we have.  Our Present-Moment Self and/or our Ally need to Give us Permission to Let Go of the Habit.  Yes, we drop into the Void when we drop that Habit, but Emptiness is the Womb that precedes Rebirth – another important reminder for our Guides to Give us.

And the chart is full of Grace.  Healing our Emotional Baggage is only the Rider; the Enhanced Diamond Star is the Horse.  The Horse can carry you much farther, and with much greater Ease, than you can travel on your own.  And the Timing is Gloriously Right.  Grand Septiles are rare, and if we can use this one to Let Go of Emotional Baggage that stands between us and our Liberation, it’s a phenomenal Blessing.  You know from Experience how Effortless something is when the Time Is Right, and how Impossible the same task can be when the Time Isn’t Right.

One more boon.  Nessus-Nemesis (Letting Go of Trauma) is part of a second T-Square, with Vesta-Karma (Archaic Self-Sabotage) and Veritas (Present-Moment Truth).  This T-Square is Trine-Bridged by Pallas/Boundaries – the primary Benefactor of the original Enhanced Diamond Star…

So, what would happen if there was an additional planet Opposing Saturn-Klotho, at 4 Cancer?  We’d have another Diamond Star, which would greatly Ease the whole Letting-Go-of-Emotional-Baggage process.  A Vacancy in an almost-Major-Configuration becomes the Power Point of the chart, because if we can Consciously provide that Energy, we Complete the Configuration and Balance the Energy – the astrological equivalent of Tapping. 

Cancer 4 is “A cat arguing with a mouse.”  That’s our Doubt, Anxiety, and Lack of Trust.  Arguments are Either/Or contests, Energy-wasting Diversions.  So we need to be Hypervigilant for these Mental Noises, Poor-Sweetheart them, Tap Out the Anxiety, thank them for attempting to contribute, Chuckle at them Tenderly, and send them away with instructions to return when they’ve Negotiated Win-Win.  They’re likely to come back with the password to Smaug’s hoard.

Abundance New Moon

January 17, 2018

The 16 January New Moon itself is more prosaic.  The Moon is the Focus of a Challenge to Mastery (T-Square), implying that we’ll be Challenged over the next few weeks.  In what way?  Well, we know our Values will be Confronted (Venus on the New Moon), and we usually have a lot of Identity Attached to our Values, so that’s a Threat.  We also know we’re up for Rebirth (Haumea on one side of the base of the T-Square).  That should be a Joyous occasion.  Oh.  Well, yeah, I guess we might hesitate to give up some of what we’re being Rebirthed from.  Hmm.  Like what? 

Well, there’s a part of our Life that we just sort of Accept as “The Way It Is” because we’ve just never seen how it might be otherwise (Moira-as-Fate et al on the other end of the base).  We’ve even set up probably-by-now-Unconscious Boundaries against the Disappointment we’ve become Resigned to (Pallas/Boundaries too).  Um, it looks like those Boundaries are Breaking Down (Eris-Uranus/Revelation of the Soul Self as well).  We know it’s Time for something Big (previous post), and the Arcturians have advised (in the post before that) – “don’t wait” for it…

Feel the vibration of that which you want to be living, and then open your heart to access the stream of Source Energy that comes to you from your heart center.  Use that energy to create the experience you want to be feeling.  Let yourself have the experience now.  Don’t wait.  Don’t even wait for what you have created to come to you before you start living it, experientially.”

Kinda Scary.  What have you been thinking, “Wouldn’t it be nice to…”?  So, what stops you?  Oh, that.  Something about Survival?  Like, say, Doubt?  Lack of Trust?  Doesn’t feel like we’re making that up, but I guess we are.  Usually-Reliable Sources tell me that “there is no Universal Law of Scarcity” – there’s only misinterpreted Fear (that makes sense – Sedna makes a Quincunx Bridge to the T-Square). 

“To think prosperously in spite of appearances to the contrary is worth every effort, because it produces rich results…  Another way to invoke the law of increase, and thus to avoid the pettiness and destructiveness of the law of decrease, is by training your mind never to be disappointed.  If certain things do not come at certain times in the way you wished, do not consider it a failure. 

“Since you have not received that thing, you can instead stand firm in the faith that something much better is on the way and will appear at the right time.  When you seem to fail, remind yourself that you have not asked big enough.  Expand your viewpoint and expectation, and a larger answer than you originally anticipated will surely come.  Failure is nothing but success trying to be born in a bigger way.” 

— Catherine Ponder, The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity, pp.126-7.

Guess we better Locate this Fear stuff and Tap it Out.Besides having our Values Challenged, it looks like the Fear and the Rebirth should be where we put our Attention (the green-wedge Fingers of God).  Any other Friends in the chart?  Hmmm, looks like our Forbidden Genius may bail us out, if we’re Responsive to it (the Ixion-Pholus Trine Bridge), and our Survival Instincts should help Guide us (Quaoar Conjoining as well), though that could be a little tricky.  Remember those Boundaries against Disappointment?  They’ve been disguised as Survival Instincts all these years.  We’ll have to finesse that.

Oh my, there must be some Trauma holding up those Boundaries against What We’ve Always Wanted but Wasn’t Possible (Chiron Quincunx-Bridging the T-Square).  What if we could Choose to Neutralize the Trauma (Lachesis Conjoining, in its Guise of making the Choice to End a Timeline early – the only requirement is knowing that Fate and Karma are Paper Tigers)?  Starting by Poor-Sweethearting it maybe (it is Chiron, Master of Making Miracles out of Despair)?

Okay, forewarned is forearmed.  If we can Avoid Regressing and forgetting everything we’ve Learned in the past half-century when that Trauma revisits, we have a tentative Strategy.  I still Believe that All Prayers Are Answered sooner or later, so I think I’ll PIAVA now that I Remember.

Hmmm.  We might have a clue about when and how this Trauma (in the singular, we hope, though Traumas are known to breed) crawls out of the Mud.  Remember asteroid Nemesis, the one that we associate with Ego Death because the Goddess Nemesis was in charge of remediating Guilt?  It entered Pisces (Emotional Detox) on 15 January (4:30 am PST), and during the course of this Moon Cycle will dance with OR10 (Intrustive Memories) on 22 January (12am PST) and with Nessus (Abuse and Privilege) on 27 January (5pm PST).  That’s as good an excuse for revisiting Trauma as I can imagine.

OR10 Initiates Nemesis in 4 Pisces, “Heavy car traffic on a narrow isthmus linking two seashore resorts.”  Rudhyar’s take is “The mobility and intensity of interchanges which make possible and characterize complex social processes.”  Translate that from Sociologuese to English (“it’s a Jungle out there”) and we can end up revisiting any number of possible Trauma situations in our Personal Histories and Herstories, including episodes of Abuse.  If you have Heavy Dreams or Hallucinations around 22 January, tough it out; it’s just your Inner Child calling for you.

Nessus Initiates Nemesis in 6 Pisces, “A parade of army officers in full dress.”  I consulted for a federal agency in DC for a while back in the ’80s, and many of the denizens were ex-military.  The ex-Army people wouldn’t do anything without being told to.  The ex-Navy people were obviously trained to think for themselves, and did so.  Full dress implies Full Compliance with orders.  This conjures up the classical protocols that #MeToo is combatting.  Expect ongoing big #MeToo news toward the end of the month, and your own Abuse memories to surface.

Abuse is often associated with Sex and Violence, but it’s far more pervasive than that.  For instance, one nasty sort of Abuse is when the significant adults in your childhood never Inquire about who you are, they’re totally absorbed in Programming you to look like their portrait of what kids are supposed to look and sound and act like.  Growing Up without an accurate or caring Mirror leaves long-lasting scars in our Ego structure.  The Suffocation you may have received from overbearing adults, and the Abandonment you felt from uncaring adults, are both serious Abuse scars, whether you would use that word for them or not.

New Province VI-2b

January 7, 2018

Here’s an “I second the Yintegrity motion” from the Arcturians, channeled by Cherie Frances this time…

 https://roserambles.org/2018/01/04/the-arcturians-mother-earth-will-take-her-seat-amongst-the-galaxies-of-the-universe-jan-4-2018/

“Let us speak a little of what it takes to release the tension of the new beginnings upon your Earth realm.  Feel yourselves grow, change envelop the new tidings of love and joy – and heartfelt displeasure at what it was that took you so far to get here to this stage of love, joy and unity.  Feel yourselves expanding, growing and maturing evermore into the unfolding and refolding and back and forth, like the tides, into the ever more complex multidimensionality of your Selves and cells. 

“We are here to bring you the upmost of important of messages.  It is: Be who you are.  Not what others believe or expect of you.  You are who you are for a reason.  For the Earth realm.  Not for the Higher realms or any other realm.  You are on planet Earth, in and on the heart of Gaia for a reason.  Embrace it, acknowledge it, share it among yourselves. 

“There is so much escaping and expectation, and mourning and loss and it saddens us kinfolk among you to see you are not living up to your expectations of what it actually means to be on the Earth realm.  Changing, obscuring, desensitising and obfuscating the Truth for realities of unknown measure.  We understand it is difficult to live the realities of who you are, why so many cling to un-realities, driven by ego and greed… yet find within yourselves the measure of the ‘small’ person you are, the smallest most secret and hidden part of yourselves that have been closed up and hidden for fear of being trampled on and exposed. 

“Bring them out in full force.  Expose them for the greatness and beauty of all their honour.  This is the smallest most vulnerable, most magnificent part of your Selves that must expand in consciousness.  Stretch out and reach for the stars, planets and galaxies that long to realise the strength of your muster.  Earth will take its seat amongst the galaxies of the universe as one of its allies of strength and unity in the Federation of Light.”

Of course one of the first Yes-Butts about Yintegrity is, How do we Survive doing Yintegrity when the rest of the World is doing YangtegrityThe Yes-And is that we minimize our Commitments, Renegotiate often, and, when we don’t have an opportunity to Renegotiate and the Relationship is valuable, Make Amends.

A more consequential Yes-But is What if I have parts of myself that for very good reasons I don’t like?  And worse, parts of myself that I know very well others don’t like, because they’ve told me so, loud and clear?  Sure, we can “Prescribe” more Self-Love and more Self-Sovereignty, but really, how do you Respond to that? – “Easy for you to say?”  I mean, we’ve been working with that Energy all our Life, and have we found Resolution yet?

Now that our Forbidden Genii are pushing to the fore, we’ve got some real homework to do.

These Energies have three feet in the Unconscious – if they were Conscious we’d have Dismissed them long ago – and we don’t Change the Unconscious with Prescription.  We’ve spoken often about how to use the combination of PIAVAing, Poor-Sweethearting, and Tapping, iteratively to Liberate ourselves from Archetypes.  But what if, Nevertheless, They Persist?  And what if we don’t yet have enough Clear Consciousness about them to know how to proceed?

Let’s take an example.  This is the approximate birth chart of one of the long-time Perps of Abuse of Power, currently a “Victim” (not that they haven’t worked hard to earn this dubious distinction) of #MeToo…

We find a serious Challenge (T-Square) to Self-Love (Sappho) and to Ending their Resistance (Atropos) to same (the Houses aren’t accurate).  If you knew who this is, you’d see instantly how they’ve made a fortune by Acting Out that Challenge.  Though this may or may not have been a Conscious choice on their part, it’s an example of how Recovering our Forbidden Genius can pave our Yellow Brick Road.  That’s one way to put our Forbidden Genius to work – Act it Out in a way that seems like you’re making a parody of It. 

A parody of It in others of course – few of us have a Forbidden Genius that’s so unique that others won’t understand our Pain, and appreciate the opportunity to make Light of it.  That’s likely to feel very Vulnerable – of course your audience will think you’re talking about yourself, which will likely Retrigger the Shame that drove your Genius underground in the first place.  Our “Native” (that’s what astrologers call the person whose chart they’re reading – the one with the “Nativity”) may have been able to pull this off because of Intuitive Memories of Trust (Asbolus Opposite Mnemosyne-Aletheia in the base of the Sappho-Asbolus T-Square).

So we have a Perp who’s been Abusing Power.  So where is their Nessus, the dwarf planet that we associate with Abuse and Privilege?  Okay, it’s seriously Challenged by (T-Square to) Compulsion (Pluto) and Action (Mars).  Anybody with a Nessus-Mars-Pluto T-Square has dialed up a very serious Karmic Lifetime.  Most folks with this Configuration, if they haven’t gotten very Conscious and very Practiced with this Energy, are probably in prison.  If this is your Forbidden Genius, prison counselors aren’t very well paid, but there’s a huge and lucrative market for Hollywood crime scriptwriters.  

Ah, the T-Square is Completed, by Venus, making a Grand Cross.  A Grand Cross is more Balanced than a T-Square alone (even though a Grand Cross is composed of four T-Squares), probably making our Native less Out of Control.  And Venus would soften the whole Energy – though worse case it could make for an Unconscious person who Values (Venus) Active Compulsive Abuse of Power.  So far we have a person who might do well as a Detective, since they’d know quite well what Motivates many scofflaws.

And, our Perp’s Nessus is at the focus of a Pay-Attention (Finger of God – the green wedge).  That will raise the probability that our Native gets Conscious of their Compulsions.  And if they don’t get Conscious, it’ll raise the probability that Trouble will find them, and it’ll Escalate its prodding until they do figure it out.

Ah again – look at all those blue lines!  Those represent Blessings.  The big blue triangle is a Grand Trine, symbolizing Dumb-Luck Grace, the kind of Luck that can make us Arrogant till we figure out that everyone has a Unique Skill.  It’s in the Earth Signs, so our Native will be very Grounded, and that includes Mars, so they’re likely to be less reckless in their Actions than they otherwise might be. 

And there’s more – the shorter blue lines trace out five sides of a hexagram or Grand Sextile.  A Grand Sextile makes the results of their Actions likely to be successful, but theirs is one corner (labeled with a “V” in a circle, for “Vacancy”) short of Complete, so they’ll need to contribute that Energy Consciously to make their Endeavors work out.  That corner is occupied by a Star, however – Markeb, signifying Steadiness in the course of Movement – and Good Fortune followed by Disgrace.  But, as it’s in a Grand Sextile, the Disgrace may not be as complete as it has been with some #MeToo Perps.

I made a quick check on five other #MeToo Perps relative to their natal Nessus, and found…

Nessus-Lilith Square Mars-Pluto Square Jupiter Square Chiron
Nessus Square Pluto
Pluto T-Square on Nessus Opposite Mars
Nessus-Jupiter Square Pluto
Nessus Opposite Jupiter

So, what’s our point?  When our Development of a particular Skill is Frozen st some age, our Psychological Age with that Skill remains the same as it was at the time the Skill was Frozen.  In addition, when the Issue arises, we Regress to that Age, and lose track of ALL of the Skills we’ve Learned since.  In a Culture that’s very screwed up about Power and Sex, when either or both are Strong in a chart they’re likely to be driven underground, producing many adults whose relationship to Power and Sex remains Infantile or Adolescent, and who lose most of their Adult Skills when Issues of Power or Sex arise.

Power and Sex are additionally complicated in some cases by Genetic and Socially Conditioned Patterns that differ from the Cultural Norms.  There may be Unconscious Archetypes or Conscious Strategies operating that are perfectly Healthy in some Cultures, just not in the Culture that the person happens to be operating in. 

For instance, in some Cultures and Species it’s appropriate for Survival that the alpha males do most of the mating – and in practice that’s often what happens in Human society.  The rest of the males shift to the Yin Masculine as Genia Haddon calls it, as the equivalent of “Worker Bees.”  When an alpha male is a Bully, or when a beta or omega male has a high Sex drive and low Consciousness, problems arise.  The #MeToo Perps fall mostly in the latter category.

What’s True about Power and Sex will also be True about any other aspect of our Forbidden Genius, whatever Skill that involves.

So, what do we do about this?  Well, of course the first thing we need to do is get Conscious of what’s Frozen.  Since we Regress when it comes up, we’re very likely to be Frightened by it; it’s as Overwhelming now as it was then, because we are then.  It’s also almost always Karmic, so we’re also Regressed to “Previous” Lives where the Issue was unresolved, so it’s probably Traumatic, and may well have led to our Death in those Lifetimes.  So there are Strong barriers to a straightforward Recovery. 

We need to start with any kernel we can get hold of – which is probably easy, since it’s likely to be something about what we’ve always Craved but have never given ourselves Permission to Receive.  Which may look like something we’ve been trying hard to Achieve all our Life but never successfully.  Nevertheless, we Persisted.  We never had a choice.

Bessel van der Kolk’s Experience and Research (The Body Keeps the Score) shows that one of the most reliable ways to overcome PTSD is Theater.  We don’t need to move to Hollywood or get involved with our local theater group; all we need is a Trusted Collaborator or two.  We let our Creativity loose and Dance around the kernel we have.  This may or may not shake loose the Held Emotions so we can endeavor to Heal them, but it will give us practice.  Our primary need is to advance the age of our Frozen Skillset, and we do that the same way we would have done it at the age of its Freezing – we practice.

Once we are able to put and keep our Current-Moment Adult and our Regressed Child in the same room at the same time, the many additional Skillsets that our Adult can contribute will be a tremendous aid to advancing our Frozen Skillset beyond the age of the Regressed Child.