It will behoove us to have a quick Review…
What was different in your Life last week, relative to the week before?
What Feels different today than it Felt in the middle of last week?
Was there anything you had to strongly Resist last week, or that you Regret this week? Anything you felt Guilty about? Any free-floating Apprehension?
If there was anything you Felt like you had to strongly Resist or Felt Guilty about, it was probably either an important Latent Talent that you were taught was rude, or Selfishness and Pride, and probably both. There’s still time for you to Reconsider. You were doing things last week that you seldom do, and you were doing them with Confidence. And if you Felt afterward that someone was likely to “cut you down to size,” you’re on the right track. The more subtle it was, the more important it is.
For instance, I was in an all-day meeting with 60-70 people, and I was much less shy, more talkative, and more Confident than I usually am in groups. I didn’t speak out of turn or make jokes or otherwise (gently) disrupt, as I can do at times; instead I had many satisfying one-on-one encounters. Afterward I didn’t Regret anything, but I did Feel a vague sense of unease that I couldn’t “pin” on anything in particular. It was all very subtle; if I didn’t know what to look for I could easily just disregard it.
This was Ixion (our Latent Genius) and Sappho (Self-Love) at work. My father grew up during the Depression, where as he often said there were dozens of people waiting to take your place if you weren’t the best at your task. He often advised us to keep a low profile, work quietly and well, and not give anybody any reason to shoot us down. One of the worst things we could do was to be “too big for our britches.” Excellent Self-Protection, but mediocre Self-Love. Good work Skills, but lousy to absent Self-Promotion.
The subtlety is important because the more low-key the effect, the more Unconscious the material, and the more important it is to Recover, by bringing it fully into Consciousness. Consciousness means Choice. When my Self-Respect is Conscious, I can make moment-to-moment Decisions about whether and how to speak up. I won’t be inspired to clam up, or disrupt, by vague undetermined urges. I’ll have more Choice over whether and when and how to speak well of myself.
Can you make any sense of the five questions above and how they fit into your own Life?