One thing certain about Ego Death; we have no idea where it will lead, or who will be meeting us – that is, who we’re going to be – on the Other Side. But we have to be Open to finding out, as the alternatives are not positive.
If we succeed in that alternating Tapping-Out and You-poor-Sweethearting process, our Wounded Child (or Hiroshima-Survivor) might Grace us with an interview. After another epic Sleep, I found my own Survivor in the fetal position at the back of a closet with their arms over their head. They couldn’t uncurl to talk about whatever Horror they were trying to protect themself from, but at least they let me approach and put a hand on them tenderly, that’s Progress.
There are a load of niggling little Irritants in the Full Moon chart, in addition to the other major Configurations that we shouldn’t leave out, starting with the role of Orcus and Oaths.
After we mention that of course this is also a Pallas-Mars Full Moon, with Pallas-Mars firmly locked in the Fear-of-Burning-at-the-Stake Trust Configuration we’ve talked about.
Pallas-Mars still Opposes Eurydike (Trust), both of which T-Square (Challenge) the Opposition from Lilith (Self-Sovereignty of our Inner Female) to Sedna (Breathing into Terror and Panic) in the Central Spine of our Yin Gate and Golden-Rectangle and Full-Moon Abandoned-Genius Recovery. Nothing trivial here.
Orcus, which represents the Oaths we have sworn over the course of our Personal and Karmic history and the Consequences of Breaking them (mostly Enduring Guilt), is still very much Lit Up, first and second in its own right, and third as part of the whole Full Moon Complex.
Orcus was Stationary only three days ago, meaning that it’s very much still Standing Still (Strong).
Also, it’s still Conjunct the North Node (our Mission in the Lifetime) Opposite Neptune on the South Node (Loss of the Veil over our Karma, among other things).
And third, it’s the focus of a Mjolnir across the Square from Lachesis (Measuring the Length of an Ego-Lifetime) to Uranus-Eris-Ceres-Mnemosyne (Yintegrity and Memories that must be Healed to achieve it).
A Mjolnir, Norwegian for Hammer of Thor, is about Epiphany, as Thor’s Hammer represents Lightning or Sudden Illumination. It’s a third planet at the Far Midpoint of a Square between two other planets.
As if that isn’t plenty, this makes Neptune-South Node (Naked Karma) the focus of the resulting Mjolnir Kite. And Us the smoldering cinder at the bottom end of the Lightning bolt.
Bottom Line, we could see Orcus-Oaths as the key to this whole Complex. There’s something we’re desperately clinging to, some Personal characteristic that, were we to see ourselves as that, we would be a complete and utter Failure in the Lifetime. Just to make it easier to talk about, let’s choose an arbitrary name for that Personal characteristic. Suppose it was “Liar.” In context, that epithet may be appropriate for many of us, Striving as we are toward the Truth of our Yintegrity.
How does it feel to be called a Liar? Has your mother or your father, or your Lover, every called you a Liar in Anger?
Or maybe Failure – how does it feel to be called a Failure? Who besides yourself has ever Angrily or Disgustedly called you a Failure? How does that Feel, when you call yourself a Failure?
Those are the kind of Bottom-Line Ego Issues we’re dealing with here. And those are just Words – they won’t be “Breaking any Bones.” We’re dangling over a cliff by one hand, and when we look up what are we clinging to? A Word. Wile E. Coyote Are Us. Maybe Words can Break Bones. Those old cartoons are more profound than we ever imagined – that’s why they’re still captivating.
Now, who do we know that’s both a Liar and a Failure – at least in the eyes of many, if not their own – and who flaunts it for their own Glorification? Person of the Year? Can we Empathize with that Person? Merge with them and Feel good about it? Yet we’re All One. They are Us. Maybe this is the Final Exam after all.