Okay, so “where does Eris seem to be leading me next?” What Masks are being pulled upon for me?
Well, about 45 years ago I realized that dentistry was a treadmill that required more effort than payoff, and about 35 years ago I discovered that mainstream medicine wasn’t worth the money either. Originally, I just didn’t want to devote my Life to buying someone else a new Mercedes every few years, without getting much in return. As the years have gone by, I’ve seen many more reasons to eschew for-profit medicine and its master Big Pharma, particularly where it does more harm than good in the name of quarterly profits, inflated Lifestyles, and vested interests.
So a week ago, I woke up with a swollen face and neck from an infected tooth. I’ve been through several abscesses, Healing them with other means, but never anything like this. Plus, it freaked out my wife. So we went to her dentist. Turns out that sort of swelling can close the windpipe without much notice, so I ended up spending the weekend in the hospital getting a course of IV antibiotics and steroids. After a third of a century of abstinence, stepping into the dental, mainstream medicine, and pharmaceutical worlds in one leap was certainly a huge Ego Death.
But it didn’t feel like it. There was no clinging, no hesitation, no doubt. My traditional self-Healing methods weren’t working, it felt like something I couldn’t just tolerate or adapt to, and, just one “easy” step after another, here I was in the hospital sucking up the drugs that destroy the first third of one’s immune system. Of course I was hyperalert for the many unnecessary doctor visits and irrelevant tests that you read about hospitals using to exploit the unwary, and ready to be defensive about my choices if they tried to “diagnose” me. Diagnosis is a label with enormous baggage attached to it.
But it didn’t happen. The tests and docs all seemed pretty central to the issue at hand, the people were very nice, mostly genuine, educated, caring, and sharp. So there’s the first piece of Eris intel – that our Eridean edification may arrive through witnessing that our accustomed Judgments aren’t valid. Our Judgments are certainly Limiting Beliefs. And mainstream medicine is powerfully good at dealing with emergencies.
Turns out I’m healthier than I thought I was. Doc after doc, nurse after nurse, most of them said something like “70-plus, no medical history, no medications, relatively good health – how do you do it? I’m on four meds already in my 50s.” By the third time, I realized it was a serious question, so I started answering. I told them to look up Functional Medicine, whose creed is from Aristotle – “Let Food be thy Medicine, and Medicine be thy Food” – and of course why and how to avoid Glyphosate. Many of them were already partway there in their personal Lives. Functional Medicine is new, but I’ve been following its precepts pretty faithfully for 35 years.
There’s the second piece of Eris intel – that the World is educable. I’m sure it will take a looong time before hospital “food” gets up to snuff – there was nothing on the menu that I could eat, even after they dismissed surgery and allowed that it was Safe for me to eat. Even the Broth – they had no list of ingredients for it, it just “came in a pouch.” So I got my first-ever two-day Fast, which was easy and felt good. More potential Ego Bullets dodged.
Once I got out of the hospital I had to start thinking about having the tooth pulled, and a friend inadvertently reminded me that Mercury was about to go Retrograde. I don’t usually worry much about Retrogrades, but then, I don’t sign a lot of contracts. The timeliness of the reminder gave me pause. I didn’t think it would be possible to get it out before Mercury went Retrograde; could I wait till after it turned Direct again? I didn’t want to revisit it again and again.
Differences of opinion among the docs – some said no way to wait, some said finish the antibiotics first (I’m still on followup oral antibiotics). The oral surgeon’s office said he was booked for the next three weeks – maybe waiting was my answer. But the surgeon offered his consulting services two days after I got out of the hospital. At the consultation he proposed pulling the tooth at 9:30am on 28 April. Mercury turned Retro at 10:20am – problem solved.
And with it another piece of Eris intel – don’t waste your time trying to Do and Plan – go straight to PIAVA instead. That one’s BIG.
Of course, now that I’ve had the offending tooth extracted and had to go two more days at home with only liquid Foods, I see that fasting isn’t as easy when you’re feeling better and surrounded by all of those tasty treats that dance and sing and wave their tentacles every time you walk by. So now we’re getting in a little deeper with this fourth piece of Eris intel – I’m intellectually Conscious that I eat to dispel Anxiety, but I haven’t scratched the surface of the Emotional Discernment that will be necessary to Change that Pattern.
As I’ve said many times, the Noticing is the hardest part, the Acting differently will be a Challenge, but once the effort begins, the process is self-reinforcing. So it’ll probably be easier than I imagine. But this use of Food for Emotional Control, rather than Nutrition or Celebration, certainly qualifies as one of those things that “we will discover in the way of unknown Beliefs, or long-standing Limits that we’ve misinterpreted as Irritations or social norms, and which are likely to come into Focus as Self-Sabotage.” And that we’ll be clinging to, in an addictive sense.
Multiple personalities – the folks who have cancer in one personality and not in another, for instance – is a heavier situation than most of us are in. But we all have multiple subpersonalities that may relate to each other only in passing. In some mind-spaces I have no difficulty at all passing up a candy bar – why would I want to do that to myself? In other spaces, it’s Sure, I can do that! In yet others it’s Whoa, have you tried that new Ocho Dark Coffee organic-chocolate organic-coffee bar? It’s incredible!
These three people kinda know each other, but not well. It’s almost as if they’re independent of the overall director of the Vehicle. They kind of take turns running the show, and when one is in charge, the others may be distant witnesses, but it almost seems like they don’t care. Of course tooth pain calls forth sub #1 (why would I do that to myself?) fairly reliably, because the negative feedback is immediate.
The fifth potential Ego hit will be around how to pay the hospital bills when they arrive. And I can see another, sixth piece of Eris intel – once I’m back on my feet, will I withstand the pressure to give in to the dental treadmill? I’ve yet to see dentistry really working – they wail on your mouth and checkbook, and the only result is that they want to see you again in three months, or sooner. Or will I submit eagerly, if I can scrounge up the money, because it might seem easier than self-Healing?
Time will tell about this one. The Eris-Uranus Initiation is still a month off. We don’t know what will Change, or how we’ll Change.