Wanna and Shooda

The Most Important Thing at this Full Moon (and for two weeks after) appears to be Paying Attention to anyplace in your Life where you feel Doubt or Conflict or Resentment – an Either/Or, maybe one that you’ve been struggling with for several years now.  The Either/Or probably boils down to Wanna versus Shooda.  On one side, “I Want to…” (phonetically, “I Wanna”), on the other side “You Should…” or in the case of a Regret, “You Should Have…” (pronounced “You Shooda”).  We already have a huge clue, don’t we.  “You Should” isn’t our voice talking to us like “I Want” is.  “You Should” is someone else’s voice that we’ve Internalized, Merged with, making their Energy a part of our own.

We don’t even care whose voice it is, though when we spend a few seconds Being that person it’ll be obvious.  We may know who it is before we even do that, but it’s good to check just to make sure.  It could be a composite of several people.  Wanna/Shooda is the quintessence of our Mask-Dropping Uranus-Pluto Yintegrity Issues.  What an incredible waste of Energy, source of Stress, and ultimately cause of Dis-ease.  So how to Heal it?

Well, it’s a natural for Fritz Perls’s two-chairs strategy.  Wanna sits in one chair, and Shooda in the other.  “You” bounce back and forth between the two chairs.  Wanna starts the game by asking Shooda, “What is it you Want?”  (Want is kind of Wanna’s specialty.)  Then you move to Shooda’s chair, pull on Shooda’s Personality-jammies, and try to answer honestly.  Keep trying until you find a positive Want for Wanna, something you both can get behind.  It’ll probably start by having something to do with reducing Shooda’s Anxiety (“I was afraid you’d get hurt”), and gradually move toward something to do with Wanna’s Safety or Comfort (“I Want you to be Happy!”).

Problem is, if we follow Uranus-Pluto’s siren song, we’re going to run up against all of the Yes-Buts that have ruled our Life – and Limited our Joy and Genius – so far.  Yes you Want to be an Artist, but do you know how many Artists starve to death?  Uncle Xavier was an Artist, and you know what happened to him.  Look how comfortable and confident Aunt Bee, the Engineer, is.  She was able to retire at 40!  Or maybe you really Enjoy solving complex mechanical problems, but Shooda only respected starving musicians.  Shooda may never have looked to see what you Enjoyed, or what you had effortless aptitude for.  Or they may have known what you had natural Skill and Joy for, but had no respect for it.

Wanna more or less personifies your “Pathological Genius,” the Unique Skill that of all the Entities on the Planet, only you can Master.  It’s not a Competition between you and all the other Wannabe Masters; Competition is Shooda-think, us versus them, Either/Or.  It’s about the Unique Skill that only you can contribute to the Collaborative Teamwork that will rescue the Planet from the waterfall a decade or two downstream.  Wanna-think is Both/And.  If we follow Fritz’s Gestalt far enough we may get to the place where Wanna and Shooda work together Win-Win.  That’s Power, Ease, and Health.

You’ll probably also need additional work – rewrite Dawson Church’s Tapping sequence to extend the theme, “I Seem to Believe that I Should Do Different Things than I Want to Do” or “…I Should Be Different than I Want to Be.”  Some well-thought-out PIAVAs probably wouldn’t hurt either, such as “I Wonder what it would be like to have my Shoulds Support my Wannas.”  And a few well-placed “You poor Sweetheart, you’re really Shoulding on yourself, aren’t you” Self-Empathy sessions with your Wannas wouldn’t hurt.  Follow-through is important.  Eliminating Self-Sabotage and Self-Limitation are well worth the Perseverance.  Think of the “Successful people” you know.  You could be like them.  If you Wanna.

Asteroid and dwarf planet Ceres completes a Grand Trine with the Moon and Mars-Makemake in the Full Moon chart, which creates a Kite focused on Sun-Saturn-Mercury.  So, as CAO Elizabeth points out, the Full Moon chart is one of those Maximum Power charts – a chart with a Grand Cross providing strong Motivation and Energy, while a Grand Trine provides strong Grace.  So the strongest planet in the Chart is Saturn – The Most Important Thing.  But, what is it that’s The Most Important Thing?  That would be the Opposition from Orcus to the Conjunction between Neptune and 2007 OR10.  Which is to say, the apparent Conflict between Confusing Material irrupting from the Unconscious, and Oaths we made in the Past.

Merging with another Huper – the source of our Shoulds – is the equivalent of an Oath, and probably involved Oaths directly at some point.  The major beneficiary of the chart is the Venus-Uranus Opposition, with it’s back-to-back Mjolnirs.  So the Confusing (ie, Growth-Oriented) Material is likely to be closely related to our Yintegrity.  Our Yintegrity-defying Masks are the embodiment of our Shoulds, and our Pathological Genius (which is a close cousin to our Yintegrity anyway) “contaminates” the irrupting Unconscious Material through a Novile (Occult) to Ixion.

Since the Venus-Uranus Opposition combined with the Grand Cross yields six eighths of a Grand Octile, we can say that the chart will be much easier than it could be, because Octiles are about Adjusting and Rebalancing, rather than big Challenges, or having to start from scratch – which is appropriate since we’ve already completed our freshperson, sophomore, and junior years at Yintegrity U.  The Vacancy between Sun-Saturn and Neptune-OR10 is 20 Capricorn, “A hidden choir singing during a religious service.”  The Moon-Orcus Vacancy is 21 Leo, “Intoxicated chickens dizzily flap their wings trying to fly.”

We can Consciously facilitate the process of Reforming our Shoulds, so they’re on our side, by Listening for the quiet voice of Intuition, and by developing a sense of humor about our Efforts.  For instance, it’s consistent that the more I hear my own Shoulds saying “Oh, this is bullshit” while I’m writing, the more people respond that what I’ve written has touched a chord for them.  So I’m better off seeing myself as an intoxicated Chicken singing hymns, than I am trying to act like a serious scholar of the Stars.

4 Responses to “Wanna and Shooda”

  1. soulspeak2013 Says:

    Reblogged this on At the Table, On my Plate.

  2. Arlan Says:

    I luv u ms chicken

  3. alchemist0310 Says:

    Chicken and egg are pathological genius to the grand scheme of things. Deep metaphors in “egg” mythology… need chickens, yintegrity, and on to produce eggs. The great mother; divine feminine, moon… seat of the soul; birth… intoxicated chickens lay beautiful and soulful eggs xo

  4. Grandtrines Says:

    Reblogged this on Lost Dudeist Astrology.

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